


All You Needed Was Me

by xcaellachx



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, M/M, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-07
Updated: 2014-08-07
Packaged: 2018-02-12 05:29:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 35
Words: 111,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2097417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xcaellachx/pseuds/xcaellachx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt attends the all men's college Dalton Academy in New York. He meets Blaine, an insensitive, insulting, first class jerk. Who just happens to be drop dead gorgeous. When Blaine decides Kurt should be his, will Kurt be able to resist him? Kurt has more secrets than anyone guesses, and when Blaine finds out, the jerk in him leaves and the protector emerges.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Glee or any of its characters.

Kurt couldn’t believe the magnitude of the place. It was the most palatial, sophisticated building he’d ever been in. And he had the chance to go to college here. Dalton Academy was a private men’s college who had a very slim acceptance rate. He’d already been pre-accepted and this tour was merely a formality before he began his freshman year. The sun was shining down through the domed skylight and he couldn’t help staring up as he tried to maneuver the stairs beneath him. The sight was breathtaking, but finally he looked down as he realized he couldn’t hear the annoying tour leader anymore.

“Shit,” he muttered. Figures that he would get lost before he’d even started.

Just then a young man came barreling down the stairs beside him, knocking him into the banister.

“Excuse me, can I ask you a question?” Kurt asked politely, stumbling and catching himself.

When the young man turned around, Kurt’s breath caught in his chest. The man was breathtaking. His black curly hair framed his face perfectly without overwhelming him. His mouth, dear god, his mouth was the kind of thing Kurt only dreamed about. His top lip had a deep dimple in it that made Kurt’s mouth water thinking of kissing it. But it was his eyes that caught Kurt’s attention the most. His eyes were the most spectacular shade of gold. He supposed they were probably considered hazel, but right now they were a deep golden color and Kurt was lost. The young man was a tad shorter than him but had broad shoulders that hinted at a muscular physique.

“Jesus, you done staring at me, princess?” the man said, his tone scathing.

Kurt blushed to the roots of his hair. “I, I, I’m sorry. Um, please forgive me. I can’t seem to find my tour party, I was wondering if you could point me in the direction of the library,” Kurt stuttered, barely able to remember the tour’s itinerary.

“What’s your name?” he asked abruptly.

“K, K, Kurt,” he finally got out.

“Well, k, k, Kurt, do I look like a fucking directory to you?” He glared at him for a minute and Kurt wondered if was actually waiting for an answer. “Stupid, fucking newbies,” he finally muttered, making his way down the rest of the steps and disappearing down a hall.

Kurt’s mouth hung open at the rudeness of the man. What the hell had crawled up his ass? He cursed himself for not popping back with a snappy comeback, but as was his luck, he ended up thinking of several choice phrases minutes _after_ the incident. Why did such a gorgeous guy have to be a dick? Well, Kurt guessed it was good anyway. He wasn’t here for romance or relationships, he was here to learn and learn from the best. This was what he’d worked toward all those hellish years in high school. The opportunity to escape Lima and travel to New York to attend school. It may not be NYADA, but it was a top school in New York and he’d earned a scholarship that gave him a full ride.

Hearing a high pitched, irritated voice, he realized he’d found his group and rushed to catch up. They finished the tour and Kurt signed on the dotted line to become an official member of the Dalton alumni. The very next week he was moving into his new dorm room, anxious about meeting his roommate. Those who didn’t have people they wanted to bunk with were assigned to a room with an upper classman who would be nice enough to help out with adjustment and questions.

Knocking hesitantly on the door, he twisted the handle and peered inside. There was a tall man sitting at a desk looking like he was putting together a model car.  He looked up and smiled at Kurt.

“You must be Kurt Hummel,” he said, rising up and up from his chair and holding out his hand. “I’m Jason McClure.”

“Yes, I am and it’s nice to meet you,” Kurt said, relieved to see the welcoming expression on his face. They shook hands and Kurt took a quick look around the room. Jason had picked the right side of the room which he saw was nearest the bathroom they would share. Kurt had the entire left side of the room which included a bed, desk, wardrobe, and a window. He had no problem getting the window side, he loved staring outdoors anyway, so maybe he’d move the desk right up to it.

“I hope you don’t mind that I already picked a side,” Jason said apologetically. He had warm brown eyes and medium brown hair and was very tall. Kurt figured he had to be around six foot five inches. He had a beautiful dimple that peeked when he smiled.

“I don’t mind at all. I was just nervous to meet you and hoped we’d get along,” Kurt said honestly.

“I hear you,” Jason replied. “I’m pretty easygoing, so if you are too, we’ll get on just fine.”

Kurt grimaced. “I’m not always easygoing, but I’ll try,” he said with a hopeful smile.

Jason laughed, making his dimple reappear. “Why aren’t you easygoing?”

“I’m a bit of a diva. I like things a certain way. But since it’s mostly my belongings that I’m anal about, I’m sure you won’t hate me right away,” Kurt said, grinning.

“No problem. You’re cute so I’m sure that will buy you some leeway,” he said with a saucy wink.

Kurt’s mouth fell open. Was this guy gay? “Uh, are you?” Kurt managed.

“Gay? No, I just appreciate beauty when I see it,” Jason laughed. “I don’t care about that kind of crap. There’s more important things in life than worrying about who people love.”

Kurt sighed in relief. This guy really was going to be the perfect roommate. “I’m gay,” he announced, just to test his roommates resolve.

“I know,” Jason snorted. “And you’re beautiful, so there, all of it’s out there. Do you need any help unpacking?” At Kurt’s sideways look. “Oh right, diva. Okay, well if you need anything I’ll be over there,” Jason said with another grin.

Looking more closely at the model car he was carefully piecing together, Kurt smiled. “Is that a 1967 Impala?”

It was Jason’s turn to gape at him. “You know cars?”

Kurt sniffed delicately and put his nose in the air. “I may be a diva, but I do have other interests,” he said haughtily then grinned to take the sting out of his words.

Cracking up, Jason pointed at him. “I like you, Diva. And yeah, it’s a ’67 Impala. Love this car. I wish I had one. But alas, all I get is the model. How did you get into cars?”

Kurt’s face abruptly shut down. “My dad.” He pointed at the door on the right side of the room. “Is that the bathroom?”

Jason nodded, his expression curious.

Kurt grabbed his bathroom bag and left the room. The bathroom had two sinks with two sets of shelving and mirrors. Kurt was grateful as he started setting out his products. He truly needed a bathroom all to himself, but if he had to share, at least he got his own individual space. Pausing to look at his reflection, he sighed deeply. He could do this. He had to do this.

Several minutes later, he emerged from the bathroom and saw they had company. A good looking guy with olive skin and a well kept mohawk was talking with Jason. Jason introduced him to Noah Puckerman or Puck as he preferred to be called.

“I gotta head out soon. Warbler practice is already starting,” Puck said, checking his watch.

“Warbler’s? Isn’t that your glee club slash choir?” Kurt asked excitedly. This was part of what he’d been looking forward to. He already knew all about the Warbler’s. They were known as one of the best college choirs in the country.

“Yeah, do you sing?” At Kurt’s nod, Puck grinned. “Dude, you should come and try out today. It’s the perfect time to get in there since this is the first meeting of the year.”

“That would be great,” Kurt said, his grin wide. “How do I look?” He asked, turning to Jason.

“Divine, dahling,” Jason drawled.

“Like you have any real clue,” Kurt joked.

“True,” Jason admitted. “Hey good luck. They’d be lucky to have you.”

“You don’t even know if I sing well,” Kurt said, though he was grateful for the encouragement.

“I’m sure you sing just fine,” Jason said and smiled as Kurt left the room with Puck.

They traded pleasantries as they walked. Puck was a sophomore and had been with the Warbler’s since the second semester of his freshman year.

“It took me a while to get the guts to try out. It can be pretty intimidating,” he said, then noticed Kurt’s face turn pale. “Oh shit. Sorry, dude. I’m sure it’ll be fine. Just picture them all in their underwear. That’s what I do.”

“Uh huh,” Kurt said, swallowing hard.

“Do you know what you’re going to sing?” Puck asked, hoping the change of topic would cover his slip up.

“Yeah. ‘Defying Gravity’ from Wicked,” Kurt said. He’d had this audition piece picked out and practiced to perfection for over a year. It showed his range from the lows to the highest highs. If this didn’t get him in the Warbler’s, nothing would.

“Oh okay. I think I’ve heard that one,” Puck said. “What range do you sing?”

“I’m a counter tenor,” Kurt said, unable to keep the pride from his voice. He knew his voice was unique and he hoped that would bode well during the audition.

“Damn,” Puck said with a low whistle. “The Warbler’s haven’t had a true counter tenor in years.”

Kurt already knew this as well, but he just nodded and said that was interesting.

“Well, Kurt, I’m pulling for you, so just relax and do your best,” Puck said as they approached the choir room.

Walking in, Kurt was again staggered by the architecture. The deep dark wood covering every surface, the red leather couches, the marble floor; it was spectacular.

Puck introduced Kurt to Wes, the captain of the team. Wes shook his hand warmly and gave a delighted cry when Puck told him Kurt was a counter tenor.

“Well, we’ll have some opening words and then we’ll have you and any other newbies audition. Sound good?”

Kurt nodded and smiled. He sat next to Puck and watched as the room began to fill up. When the last of the stragglers had come in, Wes introduced himself and David, the co-captain. He asked the official members of the group to come forward and introduced each of them. Kurt looked around and saw that besides him there were three other guys waiting to audition. He was happy to note that he felt a lot less nervous than some of them looked. One looked like he might vomit, his shaggy blonde hair falling over his face.

After the last member had been introduced, the large doors suddenly flung open. With a haughty grin, the gorgeous man who wouldn’t give Kurt directions came into the room, singing.

 

_Oh yeah_

_Oh yeah_

_So scared of breaking it that you won't let it bend_

_And I wrote two hundred letters I will never send_

_Sometimes these cuts are so much deeper then they seem_

_You'd rather cover up, I'd rather let them be_

_So let me be, and I'll set you free_

The rest of the men’s choir joined in and Kurt was stunned by the power of their voices mixed together. He wanted to jump up and down he was so excited to join. Even if it meant he had to spend time around the asshole. He had a beautiful voice which Kurt knew would only make him more conceited. But maybe he just needed another chance. If they were teammates, maybe he’d be nicer to Kurt. Kurt admitted to himself that he’d love to get to know him better, those eyes could melt his Doc Marten’s right off his feet.

_I am in misery_

_There ain't nobody who can comfort me_

_Why won't you answer me?_

_The silence is slowly killing me_

_Girl you really got me bad, you really got me bad_

_I'm gonna get you back, gonna get you back_

_Your salty skin and how it mixes in with mine_

_The way it feels to be completely intertwined_

_It's not that I didn't care, it's that I didn't know_

_It's not what I didn't feel, it's what I didn't show_

_So let me be, and I'll set you free_

_I am in misery_

_There ain't nobody who can comfort me_

_Why won't you answer me?_

_The silence is slowly killing me_

_Girl you really got me bad, you really got me bad_

_I'm gonna get you back, gonna get you back_

_Say your faith is shaken, you may be mistaken_

_You keep me wide awake and waiting for the sun_

_I'm desperate and confused, so far away from you_

_I'm getting here, don't care where I have to go_

_Why do you do what you do to me, yeah_

_Why won't you answer me, answer me yeah_

_Why do you do what you do to me yeah_

_Why won't you answer me, answer me yeah_

_I am in misery_

_There ain't nobody who can comfort me_

_Why won't you answer me?_

_The silence is slowly killing me_

_Girl you really got me bad, you really got me bad_

_I'm gonna get you back, gonna get you back_

At the end of the song, the small group stood and applauded as the Warbler’s high-fived each other.

Wes pulled the gorgeous man forward and had him face them. “This is our main soloist, Blaine Anderson. Blaine, these are our potential new teammates.”

“Fan-fucking-tastic,” Blaine sneered. “I didn’t know we let girls into Dalton,” he said, glaring at Kurt.

Kurt felt his face go red.

“Blaine, give him a chance, just like we gave you one,” David warned, something implied in his words that Kurt didn’t understand.

“Alright, princess, let’s see what you can do,” Blaine retorted and the Warbler’s resumed their seats.  Kurt got up and gave the CD for his accompaniment to the Warbler nearest the stereo. Kurt thought his name might be Trent, but he wouldn’t lay money on it.

“Your name, range, and title of your audition piece, please,” Wes said.

“I’m Kurt Hummel, I’m a counter tenor and I’ll be singing ‘Defying Gravity’,” he said over the murmurs that erupted when he announced his range. He crossed everything he had on him and nodded to the guy at the stereo. Hearing the familiar strains of the Broadway classic, he closed his eyes and lost himself in the song.

 

_Something has changed within me_

_Something is not the same_

_I'm through with playing by the rules_

_Of someone else's game_

_Too late for second-guessing_

_Too late to go back to sleep_

_It's time to trust my instincts_

_Close my eyes... and leap!_

_It's time to try_

_Defying gravity_

_I think I'll try_

_Defying gravity_

_Kiss me goodbye_

_I am defying gravity_

_And you won’t bring me down!_

_I'm through accepting limits_

_'cause someone says they're so_

_Some things I cannot change_

_But till I try, I'll never know!_

_Too long I've been afraid of_

_Losing love I guess I've lost_

_Well, if that's love_

_It comes at much too high a cost!_

_I'd sooner buy_

_Defying gravity_

_Kiss me goodbye_

_I'm defying gravity_

_I think I'll try_

_Defying gravity_

_And you won’t bring me down!_

_I'd sooner buy_

_Defying gravity_

_Kiss me goodbye_

_I'm defying gravity_

_I think I'll try_

_Defying gravity_

_And you won't bring me down!_

_bring me down!_

_ohh ohhh ohhhh!_

Kurt filled his lungs to capacity for the final notes, singing them flawlessly, the high F causing him no problem at all.

When he finished, he opened his eyes and looked around. The room was silent and his stomach sank.

“Holy shit,” Puck said, his eyes wide.

“What he said,” David muttered.

“Welcome aboard, princess,” Blaine said, admiration plain on his face.

Kurt clapped his hands, unable to contain his joy. The Warbler’s gathered around him and shook his hand, slapping him on the back.

Blaine stood back, his eyes glued to the porcelain face colored with pleasure at the attention. The voice that had come out of him had hit Blaine like a brick straight to his stomach. The purity and beauty of it had opened something in him and he knew one thing. He had to have Kurt. And soon.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

The next day, Kurt was still flying high on his success with the Warbler’s. He and one other singer had gotten accepted. They had their first assignment that he was currently working on. Wes had said to find a song that represented someone they cared about. A round-about way of getting to know one another. Scrolling through his iPod, he threw around a few options. Getting personal was fine, but the song still had to sound good, so he was being picky. His first night in the dorm had been surprisingly peaceful. He and Jason had talked for a little while, but both of them settled down to sleep and it was quiet for the rest of the night. Jason had left early this morning to hang out with Puck and some of his other friends, but had exchanged cell numbers in case Kurt needed anything. He now had all the Warbler’s cell numbers and they all had his. It was part of the way they communicated to get last minute rehearsal notifications out. It made Kurt feel more connected, even though he was still the new guy. Everyone had been very welcoming after his performance, congratulating him and praising his voice. All except one. Blaine had stood off to the side, glaring at him the entire time. He had no idea what he’d done to piss the guy off, but something had. Kurt had made up his mind to just avoid him and have minimal contact when he had to. He was stuck between two songs when he heard a faint knock on the door. Getting up, he figured it would be a friend of Jason’s since he didn’t have any friends yet. Though Jason was proving to be a great guy.

Opening the door, still staring at his iPod, he glanced up and froze. Blaine stood there, leaning against the doorframe, a classic pose of bad-boy nonchalance. Kurt swallowed down his gasp before it could escape him. The look on Blaine’s face was desire, plain and simple. Kurt had seen it before, aimed at other people. He wondered why he was seeing it now.

“Um, Jason’s not here,” he mumbled, grabbing the door to close it.

“If I was here for Jason, I wouldn’t be talking to your nancy face, now would I?” Blaine said, blocking the door and walking in the room. He took a cursory look around. “Let me guess, this is your side,” he said, pointing to Kurt’s bed with its elegant deep blue comforter with matching pillows.

“What do you want, Blaine,” Kurt asked, taking his earbuds out. This wasn’t good. Never get closed in with your enemies. He knew that and he hadn’t acted quickly enough.

“Disgustingly enough, I want you. I have no idea why, but your freaking voice turned me the fuck on and now I need to get you out of my system. Come here,” Blaine said, sitting at the end of Kurt’s bed, patting his lap.

Kurt's eyes went wide. “Are you out of your fucking mind?” he demanded, incredulous at the man’s daring.

“I must be. Now come here. I know you aren’t getting it anywhere else and I’ll make sure you get off, don’t worry,” Blaine said, his voice and face casual as if they were talking about the weather.

“Get the hell out of my room! I don’t want anything to do with you. You’re a prick and I wouldn’t screw you if you were the last guy on the face of the earth,” Kurt exploded. He knew his face would be bright red from the emotion, but he didn’t give it much thought. All of his instincts were screaming to get this guy out of the room. He’d learned long ago to listen to those instincts.

Blaine stood and stalked toward him. Kurt’s heart was racing with fear and rage and he didn’t move fast enough before Blaine had him trapped against the wall. His well muscled arms were caging Kurt in and he leaned close until his hips rubbed against Kurt’s. Kurt gasped at the feel of Blaine’s hardened cock resting against him. He closed his eyes and wished it would just be over.

“Open your eyes,” a gentle voice demanded.

Kurt’s eyes flew open and he was shocked at the tender look in Blaine’s eyes. “I’m not going to hurt you, princess. I just need a taste.” With that, he lowered his lips to Kurt’s keeping those soft golden eyes on him.

Soft, dry lips brushed lightly against Kurt’s. Like a brush fire, heat blazed through Kurt at the gentle touch. His eyes fluttered shut with the shock of the sensation. He’d expected to feel disgust, not this sweet exploration of his lips. Blaine’s lips moved over his mouth with practiced motions, nibbling on his upper lip, his bottom, the corners of his mouth. Kurt started when he felt Blaine’s tongue lightly touch along the seam of his lips. He gasped at the desire that coursed through his body at the sensation. Blaine took the opportunity to slip his tongue inside Kurt’s mouth. His hands moved to Kurt’s face, holding it still as he explored his lips, teeth and tongue. As their tongues rubbed against each other, Kurt let out a soft moan. He had never known that kissing could be like this. This was intense and magical.

Blaine let a sound escape him as Kurt’s tongue hesitantly massaged his. The sound broke the spell and Blaine stepped back suddenly, not caring that Kurt stumbled. The younger man’s face was flushed and his eyes were glassy with desire as he staggered to hold his place against the wall.

Kurt stared at him, unsure of what had just happened. Had he done something wrong? Kissed wrong? He knew he was inexperienced, but judging from the size of Blaine’s arousal as it had pressed against him, he figured he was holding his own.

“Blaine,” Kurt muttered, wondering what was going on.

“Don’t get your panties in a twist, princess. I got what I wanted. Now I can go find something more attractive to fuck. Anything to get your pasty face out of my head,” Blaine said scathingly. He refused to be affected by the hurt and shame on the man’s pale face.

Kurt watched Blaine stalk out the door, slamming it behind him. He stumbled to his bed and curled up on his side, letting the tears fall. He felt used, dirty, and disgusting. The kiss had started out as one of the most beautiful moments of Kurt’s entire life and had ended as a humiliating experience. He’d felt this before, it was like an old friend returning to say hello. This friend was sharp and painful, though. But he knew how to handle it.

Rolling off the bed, he walked into the bathroom, his sight clouded over with shame and pain. Reaching under the sink for the small black box, he opened it. Sighing at the sight of the shiny metal, he knew relief was just a few moments away. Unbuttoning his pants, he bared his hip. Biting his lip, he took the razor blade and pushed it into his skin and dragged. Immediately, he felt the endorphins kick in as blood bubbled up over the small cut. He sighed in relief. He knew it would work. It always did. Maybe just one more, he thought. One more to make him forget.

 

. . . . .

 

Blaine knew he was an asshole for what he’d done. But he really had just wanted a taste, to see if Kurt’s mouth was as beautiful as his voice. He would never tell Kurt he thought he was so gorgeous it was nearly painful just to look at him. And he would never tell him that the kiss had shaken him to the core of his being. He was an experienced kisser, he knew what he was doing. He could kiss someone into orgasm and not even be affected. Yet with Kurt, he’d hardened as soon as he’d opened the door. Then the kiss. Blaine rubbed his hands over his face. That kiss had been the sweetest, most pure and honest kiss he’d ever shared. Kurt tasted the way heaven must look. Blaine knew he would be able to kiss the man forever and never grow tired of it. When he’d moaned, he was grateful for interrupting himself. Otherwise he may not have stopped. He may have continued until he had the soft pale man underneath him. His biggest fear was that even that might not have been enough. Insulting him like that was purely instinct. He always let his tongue run when he was nervous or caught off guard. It had become a protective reaction to his parents at a young age. They insulted him and talked about how he was a piece of crap. He had learned how to give back as good as he got. They never knew he cried in his bed at night, all of their words running like monsters through his young mind. Now his parents left him alone. They paid for anything he wanted, giving him unlimited funds, as long as he left them alone in return. He would contact them via email or letter if he needed something. Money always arrived within hours of the request. It had made life comfortable. He’d gotten over the hurt his parents had caused years ago. Sex, pot, alcohol, all got him through the toughest of times. He’d discovered singing almost by mistake. David had heard him one afternoon when he was singing along with a CD. He’d invited him to visit the Warbler’s and see what it was all about. He’d auditioned and joined the same day. It was the first time he’d felt like he wasn’t alone. He would never be weak enough to admit it to his teammates, but they’d saved his life. With singing and performing to keep him going, he’d laid off the drinking and drugs. He still drank at parties, but it wasn’t something he _had_ to do anymore. That was one of the things that worried him about Kurt. Kurt felt like he was something Blaine _had_ to do, _had_ to be around, _had_ to have more of. Blaine responded the only way he knew how, insults. He felt like a class A prick, but he’d learned long ago that if he didn’t put himself first, protect himself, he’d only end up being the one hurt.

 

. . . . .

 

Jason came back to the room with a smile for his roommate. Kurt was a cool kid and it was promising to become a real friendship if things kept on as they were. His smile faded when he saw the pale, drawn expression on the smaller man’s face as he lay on his bed.

“Kurt, you okay?” he asked with concern.

“Fine,” Kurt replied, a weak smile pulling his lips up as he sat up. “I think I’m hungry.”

“Come on, I’ll head to the café with you. I can always use more coffee,” Jason said, even though he’d just left there.

Kurt stood and stumbled. Jason caught his arm and helped steady him. “Kurt, when’s the last time you ate?”

“Yesterday, I think,” he said. “I just need some protein. You know that is the most important part of the meal,” he told Jason as they headed out of the room.

“No way. Gotta side with the carbs,” Jason kidded, keeping a close eye on Kurt.

Kurt got on his soapbox about nutrition and Jason let him, noticing it brought some color back to his pale cheeks. Maybe the kid really was just hungry. As they entered the doors of the café, someone brushed past Kurt, shoving his shoulder roughly into the door. Kurt stumbled again. Jason saw Blaine look back and continue walking. He was going to have to have words with that asshole. He wasn’t about to let his roommate get bullied by that prick. Though with the amount of money Blaine’s folks threw at the Academy, Blaine would never get in trouble. He’d just have to handle it himself.

Kurt wasn’t surprised it was Blaine. He’d expected as much. He’d been wrong though. It hadn’t taken just one more cut of the blade to make him feel better. He should’ve known better. One more was never enough.

Jason had his arm around him as they walked to the salad bar. Concerned for his roommates health, Kurt started in on him again, pointing out the nutrition value of certain vegetables.

 


	3. Chapter 3

 “Blaine,” Jason called, seeing the curly haired tenor at the end of the hall.

Blaine turned a lifted a hand in greeting. His smile faded at the look on Jason and Puck’s faces. “Uh, what’s up guys?” Too late he realized they had backed him into a corner.

Both men, taller and towering easily over Blaine, stepped into him until all three of them were toe to toe.

“I don’t know what your fucking problem is with Kurt, but you will leave him alone. Is that understood?” Jason said, his eyes spitting fire.

“Kurt is our boy now, we protect him, we back him up. If you continue giving him problems, we will become _your_ problem, got it?” Puck growled, getting right in his face.

Blaine knew he could hold his own in a fight, but he knew he deserved this. “Yeah, I got it,” he mumbled.

“Good deal,” Jason said, giving him a grim smile. “It’s too bad, too, Kurt’s a really great guy. You would have been lucky to have him as a friend.”

Jason and Puck turned and walked away, leaving a thoughtful Blaine behind. That afternoon, Puck just happened to stop by as Kurt was getting ready for Warbler practice. Giving Jason a grateful smile, Kurt straightened his sweater and hurried after Puck.

As they assembled, Puck stayed by Kurt’s side, and though he didn’t make it look obvious, Kurt could still tell. The other new singer who had auditioned the day before came up and introduced himself to Kurt.

“I’m Colton Evans,” the new baritone said. He was the smallest guy on the team by far. He could have only been 5’6”, maybe. He had lovely strawberry blonde hair that was more strawberry. It was a lovely color that Kurt knew many women paid top dollar to achieve from a bottle. His eyes were a crystal blue, and filled with friendliness.

“Kurt Hummel. I liked your audition piece,” he replied, shaking the smaller man’s hand with a smile.

Colton blushed at the compliment. “I loved yours, too. I’ve never heard a voice like yours before,” he stammered shyly.

“Unless it was on a girl,” Blaine said snarkily as he walked by. Puck stood and walked after him, looking like he was going to threaten or even hurt Blaine. Kurt was fine with that. He was beyond appreciative of Puck and Jason looking out for him. He’d never had that before.

“Even girls don’t sound like you,” Colton said, his crystal eyes shooting daggers in Blaine’s direction.

Kurt glanced at him curiously. He wondered if Colton had had a run in with Blaine’s insults. It wouldn’t surprise him in the least. Poor kid.

“Hey, do you want to sit with me?” Kurt invited.

Colton’s smiled ear to ear. “Yes, thank you. It’s hard being new around here. It’s so intimidating, but I’m so glad to be here.”

“Same here. It was worth the weeks of nerves leading up to the audition. But we’re here now. So are you excited to perform?” Kurt asked.

“Yeah. I want to hurry up and get it out of the way, so if they’re taking volunteers, I’ll be up there. I don’t think I could live through an entire week just waiting for my turn,” Colton said, looking pale.

Kurt patted his knee. “You’ll be fine. We both will. I’ll be up there today too, if I get the chance.”

Colton’s face flooded with color. Kurt felt for him. They both had complexions that showed their every emotion.

Wes called the room to order. He really seemed to enjoy using that gavel of his. It brought everyone’s attention to him, that was for certain. He announced that the order people would perform in was chosen randomly. Reading out the list of ten singers that would perform that day, Kurt was relieved to hear his name. As the last name was read, he heard Colton sigh in relief. Both of them would be able to get their performances done today. He refused to acknowledge Blaine would be singing two people ahead of him. These performances were supposed to have some sort of emotional meaning and he doubted Blaine had an emotional bone in his body.

Over the first three performances, Kurt found that the Warbler’s were a loving group who treasured their family and friends. He wasn’t the only one to surreptitiously wipe tears from his cheeks. A glance to where Blaine was sitting showed he was at least being respectful, if not moved.

“Blaine, you’re up,” Wes said. “Just like the others, name your song and tell us the meaning of it in your life.”

Blaine walked up to the front of the room. Kurt saw him actually wipe his hands on his jeans as if he was nervous. The king asshole nervous? There had to be something else behind it.

“So, uh, I usually don’t take these assignments of Wes’s too seriously. No offense, Wes,” he said, giving the other man an apologetic smile. “But I did with this one. It’s called ‘He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother’. We all know I don’t have any brothers, not in the blood sense, anyway. But, um,” Blaine coughed and Kurt could swear his golden eyes were shining with suppressed emotion. “When I first came to Dalton, I was a mess. I don’t know if many of you knew this, but I was into drugs and drinking just to get through each day. After I joined the Warbler’s, you guys, uh, you guys became my family.” He ran his fingers through his curls, looking uncomfortable but determined. “You’re acceptance and openness and true friendship changed who I was. Now you get the charming, loving guy you see standing before you,” he said with a cocky grin as everyone laughed. Someone yelled some other choice names and Blaine just smiled and nodded. “That too. So, this song is for you guys. My brothers.” He looked down as his music started.

Kurt’s eyes were already tearing up. He couldn’t believe those words had just come from this guy’s mouth. He seemed like he’d always had it together, but maybe there was a human under there after all.

 

_The road is long_

_With many a winding turn_

_That leads us to who knows where_

_Who knows when_

_But I'm strong_

_Strong enough to carry him_

_He ain't heavy, he's my brother_

_So, on we go_

_His welfare is of my concern_

_No burden is he to bear_

_We'll get there_

_For I know_

_He would not encumber me_

_He ain't heavy, he's my brother_

_If I'm laden at all_

_I'm laden with sadness_

_That everyone's heart_

_Isn't filled with the gladness_

_Of love for one another_

_It's a long, long road_

_From which there is no return_

_While we're on the way to there_

_Why not share_

_And the load_

_Doesn't weigh me down at all_

_He ain't heavy, he's my brother_

_He's my brother_

_He ain't heavy, he's my brother..._

 

The room was filled with genuine applause. Blaine’s performance had moved everyone there and several members walked up to give him handshakes and hugs. Kurt was gazing at him, thoroughly impressed. Trent was leaning over to hug him and Blaine met his eyes over the Warbler’s shoulder. The smile he gave Kurt looked truly genuine. Kurt smiled back, willing to give as good as he got.

Several performances later, it was Kurt’s turn. He took a deep breath, appreciating the encouraging pats on his back from Puck and Colton, and went to the front.

“My name is Kurt, for those of you who don’t remember. My song is ‘I Want To Hold Your Hand’. When I was eight, my mom died,” he began, seeing several members gasp. “She had cancer and went pretty quickly. But when they were lowering her body into the ground, I remembered I needed something from my dad. A word, something, to let me know that my whole world wasn’t falling apart. I looked up and all he did was take my hand. Seeing that strong hand holding mine let me know that I wasn’t alone in the world. When I was sixteen, my father died from a heart attack,” he said, unable to hold back the tears that had built up. He stared at the floor and had to get it out. “Dad always supported my desire to come to school in New York. I think he’d be pretty proud of me. I miss him every minute of every day. He was my best friend,” Kurt said, a smile curving his lips as he looked out at the sympathetic eyes. Colton was crying, Puck patting his back. Even Blaine looked like he was in shock. “Anyway. Whenever I sing this song, it reminds of my mom and dad. This is for them.”

 

_Oh yeah, I'll tell you something_

_I think you'll understand_

_When I'll say that something_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_Oh please, say to me_

_You'll let me be your man_

_And please, say to me_

_You'll let me hold your hand_

_Now let me hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_And when I touch you I feel happy inside_

_It's such a feeling that my love_

_I can't hide_

_I can't hide_

_I can't hide_

_Yeah, you've got that something_

_I think you'll understand_

_When I'll say that something_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

_I wanna hold your hand_

 

He ended the song, not bothering to try and be strong. He let the tears fall, not caring what people thought. The next thing he felt were several hands on him, his back, shoulders, waist. Looking up, he saw he was surrounded by all of the Warbler’s. He smiled wobbly at them. Feeling a hand rubbing at his waist, he looked over and his gaze was caught by the golden eyes of Blaine. He gave Kurt a truly sympathetic smile, patted his waist, where his hand had been resting, and walked back to his seat. Kurt exchanged hugs with several others, Puck and Colton included. Then Wes called them to order and went on with the performances. Kurt felt drained from the song, but happy too. He felt accepted into the fold of the Warbler’s. It felt safe and that was something Kurt hadn’t felt since his dad had last held his hand.

 

. . . . .

 

Warbler’s were still wandering around, hanging out after practice. Kurt had talked to the other singers, congratulating them on their performances. It was a good opportunity to get to know the others, hoping he would make some friends.

Colton asked him if he wanted to get a cup of coffee and he agreed. Puck told him to call Jason if he had any problems. Kurt thanked him again and went to the café. Getting his regular non-fat double mocha, he and Colton sat in a corner near the windows. They talked about their childhoods. Colton had both parents who were still married. He’d had a near picture-perfect childhood. He told Kurt his performance made him appreciate his folks even more.

“Did your dad know you’re gay?” Colton asked, sipping his tea.

Kurt didn’t even question how he knew. His own gaydar had gone off when he’d first met the small redhead. “He did. He says Mom suspected from the time I was three. Apparently all I wanted for Christmas was a pair of sensible heels,” he said and they both chuckled. “He was really great about it. I know he wished I had been different just so I didn’t have to deal with the bullying, but I think that’s just part of being gay these days.”

Colton shook his head. “No, it’s not. At least not where I grew up. In Seattle, everyone accepted me. There was a ton of kids out of the closet in my high school. It wasn’t a big deal. If you were bi or gay, it was just as accepted as being a geek or jock.”

Kurt knew his jaw was hanging open.

Colton colored again. “I’m sorry. I hope I don’t sound like I’m bragging. I’m really not. But I wanted you to know that prejudice isn’t a national problem. I think growing up in the Midwest had to be the absolute worst place to be gay.”

“It wasn’t pleasant, that’s for sure,” Kurt said lightly. He knew he had to change the subject if he wanted to continue liking Colton. Knowing someone like him had grown up with both parents _and_ a community that accepted him made him want to hate the guy, irrational as that may be. “So what do you like to do for fun?”

They discussed music and clothes and the couple of sports teams that Colton liked. Colton looked out the window and his eyes went wide.

“Crap, what is that guy’s problem?” he asked, his face pale.

Kurt looked and saw the back of Blaine’s curly head disappearing around the corner. “He’s just an asshole. Don’t let him get to you. He’s been giving me crap since I met him. I figured he hated gays until I realized he _is_ gay,” Kurt mused.

“That guy is gay?” Colton asked, incredulous.

“As a two dollar bill,” Kurt said, smiling at the shock on the other man’s face. “Just keep your distance. He should leave you alone. If he doesn’t, let me know. My roommate has taken a dislike to Blaine since he started giving me a hard time.” At Colton’s questioning look, Kurt grinned. “My roommate is six foot five inches. Very intimidating if he wanted to be. Though he’s really just a teddy bear.”

 

. . . . .

 

“Holy shit, Anderson, what is your problem?” Darik shouted, holding his nose. “We never go for the face, you know that.”

“Go whine to someone who gives a shit,” Blaine growled, ripping his boxing gloves off and beginning to unwrap his hands. He’d just spent the last hour pummeling anyone who would take him on in the ring and he was still filled with rage. A couple of the guys had collapsed and been drug out by fellow members of their Fight Club.

“Keep this up and you’ll be out of the club. I know you’ve been warned before,” Darik said, sopping up the blood running down his face. “I think you broke my fucking nose,” he muttered, heading off to the locker room.

Blaine sighed, knowing he’d gone too far. Damn his temper! He had to keep it in check or he’d lose this outlet and he knew he needed it. Beating the crap out of others and getting his own ass kicked was a stress reliever he couldn’t give up. Moving to the heavy bag, he began throwing punches at it, timing the swing of the bag with his body weaving. Each punch landed with a solid thud and the sound and answering pain in his ungloved hands was comforting to him.

Finally, knowing he’d have the shower to himself, he went into the locker room. He didn’t want to listen to Darik whine anymore. He didn’t even know why the guy had crawled in the ring with him. He’d gotten his ass kicked by everyone in the club and had still volunteered to go at it with Blaine, who was known to be one of the toughest.

Stripping and stepping under the hot blast of the shower, he leaned his hands against the tile. The water beating down on his shoulders was soothing and he relaxed into it as much as he could. What had set him off? He’d done fine through the Warbler’s practice. His performance had gone off without a hitch and his teammates had gotten the message that he cared. He’d joined in the love fest for the princess after he sang. Truly feeling sorry for the guy had surprised Blaine, but at least he had his parents, whether they gave a shit or not. The princess had lost both of his parents who had actually seemed to like him. Thinking of Kurt’s pale face, he made the connection. The princess and that little redhead in the café. Maybe the new kid had looked at him funny? It wasn’t true, not if he was going to be honest with himself. It had bothered him to see the princess laughing it up with another guy. Though why it bugged him, he couldn’t figure out.

Finally getting dressed, he headed toward the dorms. Coming around a corner, he ran smack into Kurt. They backed away, staring at each other. Blaine was freaked out, having just been thinking about the thin man. Kurt was worried, being alone with a bully was never good. Seeing Blaine walk back toward him made him cringe down and close his eyes. A hand on his chin and a warm pair of lips against his shocked him into opening his eyes. Warm golden eyes met his surprised blue gaze. The kiss was short but gentle and sweet. Kurt was still staring at him in shock as Blaine backed away.

“Great job today, Kurt,” he said softly and continued on his way.

Kurt stood there for a long time, gently touching his mouth. It didn’t occur to him until he was in bed that night that that was the first time Blaine had said his name.  As sleep took him over, he smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I Want To Hold Your Hand - The Beatles
> 
> He Ain't Heavy - The Hollies


	4. Chapter 4

Blaine watched Kurt talking to Colton in the hall after Warbler practice. That feeling of hate and rage filled him again. When Kurt walked away, his feet moved on their own accord to stand next to the redhead. Blaine was glad that in this instance he was taller than the other man, though not by much.

“Stop talking to the princess,” he growled softly.

“Um, I’m not,” Colton pointed out, his eyes big.

“I mean period, smartass. Do not talk to him anymore, do you understand me?” Blaine’s eyes blazed with the intensity of his emotions.

Colton swallowed loudly, clutching his messenger bag closer to his body. “Why does it matter to you who I talk to. You don’t own me,” he said bravely.

“I don’t give a flying fuck who you talk to as long as you keep the hell away from the princess. I will not warn you again. Next time, my fists will do the talking for me,” Blaine threatened, taking a step toward Colton, who ducked back. He began walking away and froze when he heard Colton’s muttered question.

“Why the hell does it matter?”

“Because the princess belongs to me,” Blaine replied without meaning to. He put his head down and kept walking. He couldn’t believe he’d just said that. Judging by the shocked look on Colton’s face before he’d turned away, he was just as surprised. Shit.

 

. . . . .

 

“Colton, right? Are you okay?”

Colton turned and looked up and then up some more. “Um, yeah. Jason right? Kurt’s roommate?”

Jason smiled. “Guilty. Hope he hasn’t told too many lies about me. I saw you and Kurt having coffee yesterday. Anything special brewing?” He asked as they walked toward the dorms. He’d seen Blaine walking away from Colton and had a suspicion their conversation hadn’t been about song choices. Kurt had mentioned Colton to him and how Blaine seemed to be giving him a hard time. There was no harm in seeing the kid to his dorm building.

Colton blushed. “I had hoped so, but he seems kind of oblivious to me. He treats me like a kid brother or something. But that’s okay. I just think he’s gorgeous and wouldn’t have minded a date or something.”

Jason paused outside Colton’s building. He grinned at the much shorter man. “Yeah, Kurt’s a looker alright. But I wouldn’t worry. You’re pretty damn hot yourself. Later, blue eyes,” Jason said with a wink. Turning, he didn’t see Colton freeze in place as a smile covered his pink face.

 

. . . . .

 

“Okay, guys, we were assigned the seventies, a rather sad decade for music. The more we can change up the song, the more points we get. Remember the winners get tickets to a Broadway show, so let’s pick a great song and kick the other teams’ asses!” Jeff said, shaking a fist in the air, his blonde hair shaking into his face.

“The seventies were not a sad decade; there were some awesome songs,” Nick disagreed, reaching over to gently push the hair back behind Jeff’s ear. “I was thinking about ‘Black Water’ by the Doobie Brothers. Funky band name, but the song is great.”

Kurt grinned as his thoughts were confirmed. He’d had a suspicion those two were closer than teammates. And as Jeff gave Nick a special smile at his gesture, he knew they were in love.

“Um, I have an idea,” Kurt interjected, hoping they wouldn’t shoot him down immediately.

“Go ahead,” Nick said, reaching between him and Jeff to take his hand, trying to be subtle and failing miserably.

“Well, I saw a couple of the other groups talking with the band members, so most or all of them are using accompaniment. What if we did ‘Black Water’ a capella? With all the rounds near the end of the song, it would sound pretty amazing,” he suggested, a hesitant smile on his face.

Trent, the friendliest of all the Warbler’s clapped him hard on the back. “Fantastic idea, Kurt! Hey Jon, you used to beat box at your high school, didn’t you?”

The shy brunette nodded. “Yeah, I really enjoyed it.”

Jeff slapped his knee. “Done! ‘Black Water’ a capella. Let’s get down to some arrangements. Kurt, do you have some ideas on that?”

Kurt glowed under the question. Their group worked steadily for the next three hours, Kurt supplying ideas for choreography and division of lines. They were given two days to prepare for the decades contest. Each group was given one decade from the fifties through the nineties. They would be performing in decade order. He was just relieved that Blaine had been put in the sixties group. As long as he didn’t have to work with him, the better. He didn’t understand the man. He yelled at and insulted Kurt, then turned around and kissed him so sweetly. The first kiss had left him feeling used and dirty. The kiss from two days ago he wished had been his first kiss it was so tender and almost innocent. He still got tingles in his stomach at the thought of Blaine’s lips on his. Since then, though, other than the occasional glare and confused stare, Blaine hadn’t had any contact with him. Puck had even stopped guarding him during Warbler rehearsal because it appeared that the bullying had let up. Kurt hoped so. Classes would be starting in a little over a week and it would be nice to be able to relax and enjoy his college experience. As it was, he was attending his first party at the end of the week. The Holman House dorm was sponsoring the first party of the year. All the guys were in a frenzy as a neighboring college would be joining them and there were apparently a lot of girls. Kurt was glad he didn’t have to worry about that, though he might be able to make some new friends. He got along fabulously with women. They always made better friends. No chance of any sexual tension or misconstrued emotions. That always made things awkward. After the final Warbler decade performance, he was meeting Jason, Puck, and Colton and they’d all walk over together. Colton had become a regular visitor to their room, practicing songs and helping Jason with his model cars. Those two were getting along very well. Kurt could tell Colton was developing feelings for Jason and it was almost time to have a talk with one of them. Jason wasn’t holding back on his flirty comments and the glow Colton got every time Jason said something was a telltale sign of a crush. Kurt sighed. He didn’t know either one of them well enough yet to butt in like that, but he didn’t want to see their friendship end because of miscommunication.

Walking down the hall to his dorm room, he was running through his lines in the song. Jeff and Nick would be sharing the lead, but the sound of all their voices during the rounds was going to sound amazing. One more day of practice would give them the edge he was sure would win them the competition. He didn’t see someone come out of the bathroom across the hall, until they stepped in front of him. Blaine looked wonderful in his tight faded jeans and black v-neck shirt. The black seemed to make his eyes glow and Kurt was staggered for a moment under the intensity of his gaze.

“Hey princess,” Blaine said, his voice low, and damn sexy.

“Blaine,” Kurt acknowledged, his chin tilting up at the insulting nickname. If Blaine would be nice and use that tone on him, Kurt could listen to him all day long. But not when he was being an ass. That thought led to thoughts of Blaine’s ass, and he mentally shook himself. He needed to think around this guy, not daydream about his perfectly round, tight… shit!

“Hope you guys are gonna bring it for the decade contest,” Blaine said.

Kurt stared at him. Were they attempting an actual conversation? “Um, yeah. We’ve got a great number picked out. What about you?”

“We’re going to win. I mean, with me singing lead, how can we fail,” His eyebrow tilted up arrogantly.

Kurt gave him a genuine smile. “We’ll see about that.”

Blaine looked at him funny and Kurt could swear Blaine was staring at his mouth. Nervously, Kurt wet his lips with a quick swipe of his tongue. This time there was no question. Blaine’s golden eyes turned dark as he watched the motion. Kurt took in a shuddering breath. The tension between them was so thick, Kurt felt like he wouldn’t be able to take a step if he tried. Blaine was able to move, however, and stepped closer to him until Kurt could smell his sweet orange scented breath against his cheek. Slowly, with an expression like wonder, Blaine reached out with a finger and traced Kurt’s bottom lip. The calloused finger tip felt like a torch against his flesh. Kurt knew Blaine played the guitar and hadn’t been able to watch him the last time he played during rehearsal because his body had become so inflamed, he would have embarrassed himself. Now, feeling that finger lightly touching him made Kurt harden in his tight jeans. Without realizing what he was going to do, he let the tip of his tongue reach out and dance along Blaine’s finger. They both gasped at the sensation.

Blaine was stunned at the feeling of Kurt’s tongue and lips. He was so soft and sweet smelling. Blaine had the sudden desire to wrap himself around Kurt, to take in as much of him as he could. Kurt’s long lashes were fluttering over his excited blue eyes. Seeing the answering desire in those eyes made him lean in and replace his finger with his lips. Gently, he brushed their lips together, loving the feel of Kurt’s full mouth. This time Kurt took the lead and swept his tongue along Blaine’s lips until he opened his mouth. Their moans mingled in their mouths as they slowly explored each other with hot tongues and lips. Blaine had slowly been backing Kurt up until they were hidden in a doorway. When Kurt’s back touched the wall, Blaine moved his mouth along Kurt’s jaw line and down the smooth skin of his neck. Blaine had never been into necks particularly, but Kurt’s was long and elegant, inviting him to nibble and lick his way down. When he ran into Kurt’s collar, he made his way back up. Reaching the soft underside of Kurt’s jaw, Blaine latched his lips around his skin. He felt Kurt’s hands tangle in his hair, holding him closer, as he sucked and licked at the tender flesh. Knowing he had to stop before he threw Kurt over his shoulder and ran to his room, he quickly sealed his mouth back on Kurt’s lips. He thrust his hot tongue into his mouth, holding Kurt’s head still with his hands. Over and over he swept his tongue over Kurt’s teeth, tongue, the roof of his mouth, trying to memorize his taste and smell. Finally, he broke away, resting his forehead against Kurt’s chin as they took gasping breaths. Blaine didn’t know if he’d be able to make it back to the dorm as hard as he was. A side trip to the restroom might be called for, especially while he was still able to taste Kurt on his tongue.

Moving his mouth to Kurt’s ear, he whispered. “Go to the party with me.”

Kurt stilled under him. Had Blaine just asked him out? His mind was such a fog of desire and emotion, he couldn’t figure out how to answer. “Going. After Warbler’s. Colton,” was all he could get out. He knew there were other people going too, but he couldn’t seem to make his brain cooperate with his well-kissed mouth.

Blaine tensed and moved back from him. Kurt couldn’t help reaching out to try and pull him back. He looked at Blaine, trying to figure out what happened. Whatever happened, Blaine had left and the asshole was back. His eyes were cold and mean, his mouth twisted in a sneer.

“You actually thought I was asking you out, princess?” he laughed cruelly, bending over and smacking his knee. “I just wanted to see how far I could get you to go with a little kissing. Shit, like I’d want to be seen in public with your pasty face. Give me a break,” he said, turning away, the sneer immediately dropping off his face.

“Yeah, like I’d want to hang out with someone who stinks like Craig’s List!” Kurt yelled after him, filled with hurt and anger.

Blaine smiled grimly at Kurt’s insult. It was a good comeback. He just wished it hadn’t been called for.

Kurt slammed into his dorm room and grabbed his iPod.

“You okay, roomie?” Jason asked from his bed where he was reading.

“Fine. Gonna take a shower,” Kurt bit out, heading to the bathroom and locking it behind him. He put his hands against the sink and stared at his reflection. Pasty was a good description of his face, he guessed, blinking back the tears burning his eyes. Tilting his chin up, he saw a small bruise under his jaw. His first hickey. A physical sign that he had been used, yet again. Reaching under the sink, he pulled out the small black box.

 

. . . . .

 

“We’re changing the song and that’s final,” Blaine shouted in Thad’s face. They’d been arguing for several minutes after Blaine announced the change in song choice. He knew this left them very little time to practice, but he knew this was what he had to do. Singing was always easier than talking.

 

. . . . .

 

Kurt shifted uncomfortably during the group singing a song from the fifties. He should’ve known it was too soon to wear the skinny jeans. His hips were aching, little patches of scabs pulling and pinching. Taking a deep breath, he welcomed the discomfort and rose above it, using it to his advantage. Blaine’s group would sing next, then Kurt’s. After everyone was done, he could go change into something more comfortable for the party.

Blaine and his group took their place on the stage in the auditorium they’d gotten use of for the performances. The band switched some of their instruments around, several horns coming out. Kurt loved the saxophone and was intrigued to hear what they would be singing. A bluesy melody began and Blaine took the mike, looking right into Kurt’s eyes as he sang. Kurt could have been mistaken, but he was sitting off by himself and nobody else was near him. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the other Warbler’s glancing at him questioningly. Kurt suddenly felt like he had a neon arrow pointing at the hickey on his jaw, though he’d covered it up as best as he could. Blaine began singing, his soulful voice running over Kurt like a soothing river.

 

_If you ever change your mind_

_About leaving, leaving me behind_

_Oh-oh, bring it to me_

_Bring your sweet loving_

_Bring it on home to me, yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah)_

_I know I laughed that day that you left_

_But now I know I only hurt myself_

_Oh-oh, bring it to me_

_Bring your sweet loving_

_Bring it on home to me, yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah)_

As the horns took over, Blaine jumped off the stage and came up to Kurt, kneeling down next to him. Kurt knew his face was on fire, but the intense look on Blaine’s face kept him transfixed.

_You know I'll always be your slave_

_'Til I'm buried, buried in my grave_

_Oh honey, bring it to me_

_Bring your sweet loving_

_Bring it on home to me, yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah)_

_I say one more time, one more time_

_If you ever change your mind_

_About leaving, leaving me behind_

_Oh-oh, bring it to me_

_Bring your sweet loving_

_Bring it on home to me_

Kurt was staring wide eyed at Blaine as he finished singing. Blaine actually looked timid as they looked at each other. Finally, Blaine stood, and offered Kurt his hand.

“You’re up prin- Kurt,” he said softly.

Kurt took his hand and stood, making his way to his teammates, feeling dizzy. What did it all mean? Was Blaine apologizing for last night? Damn him, why couldn’t he just come out and say whatever the hell he meant? Kurt tried to push Blaine out of his hand as he and his group took to the stage. The watching Warbler’s looked at them askance as the band members left the stage and took a seat in the audience. Kurt smiled inside, knowing that doing this a capella was going to give them an edge. Jon started them off and they all joined in after Jeff took the lead, creating magic out of the old Cajun lyrics.

 

_Well, I built me a raft and she's ready for floatin'_

_Ol' Mississippi, she's callin' my name_

_Catfish are jumpin'_

_That paddle wheel thumpin'_

_Black water keeps rollin' on past just the same_

_Old black water, keep on rollin'_

_Mississippi moon, won't you keep on shinin' on me_

_Old black water, keep on rollin'_

_Mississippi moon, won't you keep on shinin' on me_

_Old black water, keep on rollin'_

_Mississippi moon, won't you keep on shinin' on me_

_Yeah, keep on shinin' your light_

_Gonna make everything, pretty mama_

_Gonna make everything all right_

_And I ain't got no worries_

_'Cause I ain't in no hurry at all_

_Well, if it rains, I don't care_

_Don't make no difference to me_

_Just take that street car thats goin' up town_

_Yeah, I'd like to hear some funky Dixieland_

_And dance a honky tonk_

_And I'll be buyin' ev'rybody drinks all 'roun'_

 

As they repeated the rounds, Kurt could see the audience was impressed, clapping along and lifting arms in support. He knew there were still several more teams, but he had a feeling they had this in the bag.

 

. . . . .

 

After the final team performed and the team leaders consulted in another room, Kurt’s team was announced the unanimous winner. As they were being congratulated, Kurt felt a warm hand rest on his waist. He knew who the hand belonged to. He didn’t know if he was ready to deal with more of Blaine’s crap, but he turned to him, keeping his expression even.

“You guys definitely deserved to win. Nick said going a capella was your idea, that was smart thinking,” Blaine said sincerely.

“Thanks,” Kurt said shortly. He’d fallen for Blaine’s casual conversation before and was tired of being treated like garbage.

Blaine took his hand and gently pulled him a few feet away from the rest of the group. Puck stood by, a warning look on his face. Blaine held a hand up to him, his face asking for a moment.

“What do you want, Blaine? I want to celebrate with my team and get ready for the party,” Kurt said, his tone revealing how tired he was.

“Look, Kurt. I know I fucked up last night. I _was_ asking you out. When you said you were going with Colton, I got defensive and acted like a prick. I’m sorry. And if you aren’t too pissed at me still, maybe you’ll save me a dance at the party,” Blaine said, looking down at his hands.

“I never said I was going _with_ Colton. He is in the group of people I’m going with, but that’s it,” Kurt said, confused. Then he realized with how he’d said it the previous night, it had sounded like he was going with only Colton. “I, uh, wasn’t exactly thinking clearly when you asked me,” he said quietly.

Blaine looked up, his eyes bright. “Really?” he said, though he looked like he hadn’t intended to let the word out.

“I’ll save you a dance, Blaine. See you tonight,” Kurt said with a small smile and walked to rejoin his teammates.

 

Bring It On Home To Me – Sam Cooke

Old Black Water **–** Doobie Brothers


	5. Chapter 5

Kurt gave his hair one last spritz of hairspray and nodded at his reflection. Not bad. The bruise under his jaw was still noticeable, but he didn’t bother to try and cover it up. It would most likely be dark at the party and it didn’t matter if people noticed. Thinking of how he got it made him close his eyes. Finding out Blaine had yelled at him out of jealousy made the whole experience sexier. He had been playing the scene of that kiss over and over in his mind, even in the shower. He grinned at the thought. After he’d promised a dance to Blaine, he’d come back to the room to shower and change. The image of Blaine kissing and licking his neck in the shower had been too powerful for him to resist as he’d stood under the hot spray. He’d palmed himself with a soapy hand and stroked himself to the thought of Blaine’s hot tongue against his skin. It had taken only moments before he was coming in the shower, a whisper of Blaine’s name escaping his lips.  That had only been an hour ago and here he was, thinking about it again. Shifting his hips against his body’s reaction, he gave himself a last critical look. The deep blue of the straight cut jeans hugged his shape just enough to show his shape without being constricting. Perfect for dancing, he thought with a smile. He’d paired it with a short sleeved white Henley and a black vest. Add in his most comfortable boots and he was set for a fun night. Hearing Colton and Puck talking to Jason outside, he left the bathroom and the four set off for the party.

 

Walking through the campus, the first thing sign of the party was the thumping music. The lights outside the dorm were bright, but it looked almost black inside with small flashes of neon. Puck said they usually handed out glow-in-the-dark necklaces at the door to add to the atmosphere. Jason, doing his protector part, made them all promise to call or text someone if they were leaving or needed help. It would ensure they all made it home safely. Colton and Kurt promised, Puck just smirked at him and they went into the dorm. As Puck said, they were given a choice of a necklace or bracelet and Kurt picked the bracelet, but instead of putting it on his wrist, he attached it to a belt loop on his jeans. Puck, using his alcohol radar, swiftly led them through the throngs of dancing people to the bar where he handed them each a cup of something fruity smelling. Jason sniffed it and took a taste.

“Mmm, somebody got creative. Tastes like Sex on a Beach. Go ahead,” he waved to Kurt and Colton. “Give it a try.”

Kurt took a tentative sip and smiled appreciatively. He’d never liked the taste of alcohol but the fruity flavors overpowered it and made it taste good. He took a longer pull on it and Puck slapped his back.

“Go Hummel! Alright, gents, I’m off to meet some girls. Don’t get too upset if I take them all. I’ve been known to handle entire sororities before, so fair warning.” Looking between Colton and Kurt, he laughed. “Sorry, forgot who I was talking to.” He took off, grabbing another drink on his way.

“You guys wanna dance?” Colton asked, looking eagerly at the crowd of writhing bodies. “I mean, sorry, Jason, I wasn’t um, I was just, um,” he stuttered, realizing Jason might be uncomfortable dancing with a guy.

“Sounds good, lead on, Shorty,” Jason said, putting his drink down and taking Colton’s hand. Kurt saw the delighted smile on Colton’s face as they made their way to the dance floor. Kurt walked around until he found an open section of wall to lean against. People watching had always been a fun past time and he was quickly finding that a drunken dorm party was even more fun. Women were dancing on tables surrounded by starved looking Dalton guys. There was a game of spin the bottle going on in the far corner. It looked like if the bottle landed on you, you were required to try and swallow someone else’s face whole. Kurt laughed and finished his drink. He found a garbage can, though it didn’t look like anyone else was using it and decided to join the dancing. Jason found a girl to dance with and at the sad look on Colton’s face, Kurt danced with him to a couple of songs. Another guy interrupted them and asked Colton to dance, who immediately said yes, after Kurt nodded.

Kurt found the bar and the fruity drink, taking a breather. The party was a lot of fun. It had no threatening undertones, no obvious homophobes. It was a truly good time. He sat out the next full song until Jason and Colton came and found him.

“Come on, Kurt,” Jason said, tugging him toward the dance floor.

“No standing around, it’s time to dance again,” Colton agreed.

Kurt laughed and gave in. A new song was starting, Kurt recognized it as “S.E.X.”  by Nickelback. It had a great beat and he closed his eyes and let his body lead the way in the dance.

 

Blaine watched Kurt dance, trying to keep his jaw from hanging open. Kurt looked amazing tonight. The jeans were hugging his ass just right and with the glow-in-the-dark circle hanging from his hips, Blaine was unable to tear his eyes away. The way he circled his hips to the beat, the glowing bracelet making designs in the air, the undulating and spinning was so fucking sexy, Blaine was getting hard in his jeans. He’d been keeping a general eye on Kurt all evening, half nervous to claim his dance and half wanting to make sure he was okay. Seeing him dance with Jason and then Colton, he realized the three were all just friends, though he was sure Colton would jump on Jason if he weren’t straight. Now, though, he knew he was going to claim his dance. He wanted those hips up against him. Going to the DJ, he whispered in his ear and handed him a fifty dollar bill. The guy smiled and nodded and started searching through his music.

Blaine made his way to Kurt as the song ended and his song choice began. He tapped him on the shoulder and gave him a smile.

“Mind if I have this dance?” he asked, trying to keep the plain lust out of his eyes.

Kurt grinned, his eyes bright from the fruity drinks he’d been having all night. “Sure.”

Blaine took his hand and pulled him to the corner of the dance floor. They both started moving slowly to the beat.

“Having fun?” Blaine asked, inching closer.

“Yeah, this is the funnest party I’ve ever been to,” Kurt said. He didn’t know if he was intoxicated by the alcohol in his system or the smoldering gaze of Blaine’s golden eyes. He was dressed in his typical tight v-neck t-shirt and jeans that looked like he’d been poured into. It left very little to the imagination and Kurt had to keep his eyes on Blaine or he’d give away his own thoughts.

“You haven’t been to many parties, then, have you,” Blaine asked with a grin, moving even closer.

“Not really,” Kurt said, watching Blaine as he moved in on him. When Blaine wrapped his arms around Kurt’s waist, he put his hands around Blaine’s neck. Swaying together, Blaine moved one of his legs in between Kurt’s as he dipped them lower, undulating, pressing their hips together. Kurt inched in until his face was buried in Blaine’s neck, taking in his unbelievable scent. They were both half hard and were both aware of the other’s arousal. Kurt took in small shuddering breaths as they grinded against each other. The sensation of his cock rubbing against Blaine’s through their jeans made him want to cry out with the pleasure.

 

_Hello, welcome to the show_

_Somebody's gotta be on top_

_And that's the way it goes_

_Oh yeah, lights off time to_

_set this party off baby pull_

_Down the shades they're gonna_

_Be like down for days clothes_

_Off for a private dance tonight_

_I wanna take you down naughty_

_Street tonight_

_Baby let's keep it private cause_

_Were getting ready to ride it_

_Ecstasy on the balcony going down_

_For more on the kitchen floor_

_Slipping and sliding I want you_

_To ride it on my knees I'll have_

_You screaming wait, wait, wait_

_Don't let it go_

_Don't you wanna come along for the_

_Ride of your life (somebody) somebody's_

_Gotta be on top coco butter skin I can't_

_Wait till I get in your body somebody's_

_Gotta be on top_

_Right now I think I I'm gonna shut this_

_Party down. There's a sequel to the show_

_Come on i gotta let you know admission_

_Can't be paid at the door stroke, stroke,_

_Poke, joke gonna blow it out sugar ain’t no_

_Doubt I'll be stroking that's what I'd be talking_

 

“Kurt,” Blaine muttered, digging his hands into Kurt’s back pockets, grabbing his ass and pressing their pelvis’s even closer.

Kurt was watching a drop of sweat trail down the side of Blaine’s neck and he couldn’t resist reaching out with his tongue and lapping it up, enjoying the shudder that went through Blaine’s body. Keeping one hand on Kurt’s ass, Blaine reached up and took the back of his head with the other hand, smashing their lips together. Pure heat spread between them as their tongues danced and thrust against each other to the beat of the song.

 

_Looking for the softest place on earth_

_Someone to break me off let’s stick it_

_To the bed get it nice and wet never_

_Do it from the side just kiss the chest_

 

Kurt had never thought he could be this turned on. If they kept this up, he might just come in his jeans. Ripping his mouth from Blaine’s he heard Blaine cry out in protest. Spinning quickly, Kurt backed up until his ass was flush with Blaine’s cock. They both yelled, not caring who heard them, as their bodies made contact. Blaine approved of the new position, wrapping his around Kurt’s slim waist, holding his hips against his own as they began swaying to the beat. Kurt reached over his shoulders and put his hands around Blaine’s neck, pulling his lips down to his neck. Blaine obliged and began sucking, nipping, and licking at Kurt’s sweat streaked skin, grinding his hips into Kurt’s soft ass.

 

_Looking for the softest place on earth_

_Someone to break me off I'll kiss you on_

_Your neck than down your back doing it_

_All night long like insomniacs lookin_

_For the softest place on earth someone_

_To break me off take the pillows off the_

_Couch put them on the floor give it to you_

_Nice and strong make you scream for more_

_Lookin for the softest place on earth_

_Someone to break me off if you’re feeling me_

_Like I'm feeling you get on top of me_

 

The song ended, but neither of them noticed. Blaine couldn’t believe how close he was to orgasm. There had never been such an intense dance as this one before, never a man like Kurt. He was feeling things beyond arousal, that  made his chest ache. Lightly, he brushed a hand down Kurt’s flat stomach, intrigued at how he was both firm and soft at the same time. Skimming his fingers over Kurt’s arousal, he heard a desperate whimper escape the other man’s throat.

“Let me make you feel good, Kurt, please. No sex, just let me make you feel good,” Blaine breathed heavily in Kurt’s ear, nipping at his neck.

“Yes,” Kurt muttered.

As soon as the word left his mouth, Blaine was dragging him out of the room by the hand. After knocking on several doors, he found an empty room and shoved Kurt inside. Turning the light on, he pushed Kurt up against a wall and stared at him for a long moment. “You are so beautiful,” he murmured. Kurt's skin was glowing from arousal, drinks, and the dance. He’d never seen anyone so breathtaking as this man in front of him. He could have brought Kurt to orgasm in moments, but he wanted to make it special for him, even if it was in a strange room at a dorm party.

At his compliment, Kurt’s eyes fluttered closed and a small smile lifted his full mouth. Blaine leaned in and pressed his lips softly to Kurt’s. For several minutes, he went no further, just moving their mouths together, listening to the small pants escaping Kurt, each sound sending shivers through his body. Kurt apparently didn’t like his pace as he suddenly thrust his hot tongue into Blaine’s mouth, wrapping his arms around Blaine’s neck, locking them together. They lapped hungrily at each other, Kurt trying to press his hips tighter around Blaine.

Blaine reached around and grabbed Kurt’s ass, easily lifting him against the wall. Kurt took the hint and wrapped his legs around Blaine’s waist. Nothing could have prevented their loud cries as the position lined them up so Blaine’s cock was rubbing at Kurt’s ass.

“Blaine, please,” Kurt whimpered.

“I know, baby, me too,” Blaine muttered. He began grinding his hips into Kurt’s ass, feeling Kurt’s hard cock against his stomach. Harder and harder they pushed into each other, the sensations pushing them over the edge.

“Blaine!” Kurt cried out, his head falling back against the wall as he came.

Feeling the subtle throbs of Kurt coming against him pushed Blaine to orgasm, shouting out Kurt’s name with one final thrust against his ass.

They rested there for a moment, breathing heavily against each other. Blaine eased Kurt down gently, unable to resist kissing lightly at his chin and lips.

“That was,” Kurt sighed, unable to come up with the right words.

“It was,” Blaine simply agreed. “Come on,” he said and gently took Kurt’s hand. He led them slowly from the room and to a bathroom. He nudged Kurt inside. “You clean up, I’ll wait for you here.”

Kurt’s eyes sparkled with pleasure. “I’d like that.”

“Me too,” Blaine said, sounding half surprised.

As Kurt went into the bathroom, Blaine leaned weakly against the wall. That had been the most intense orgasm of his life and with his experience, that was saying something. There had been no bare skin, only the intensity of their bodies together. Blaine knew he wasn’t much for emotions and such, but there was no way he was letting this boy out of his life. He’d find a way to buy himself a filter for his mouth so he wouldn’t fuck it up. All he knew was that Kurt was his now and he’d do whatever it took to keep him that way.

 

**“Somebody’s Gotta Be On Top” by Joe**

**“S.E.X.”  by Nickelback**


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’ll just apologize now…. Sorry readers. Stay strong. When Blaine sings, please listen along at http://www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=dljAhxeH_uE The song is so perfect for the scene. It’s called Never Gonna Be Alone by Nickelback. Still don’t own Glee or their characters.

Kurt finished up in the bathroom, not even trying to keep the delirious smile off his face. He didn’t care if his boxers were wet or that he could really use a shower. What they’d done, the feelings he’d felt… it had been as close to perfect as Kurt thought it could get. And the man who’d invoked all those feelings was standing right outside waiting for him. Wiping his hands on a paper towel, he chucked it in the trash and walked out. Blaine was standing right where he’d left him, a hesitant smile on his face.

Kurt grinned shyly. “You’re turn. I’ll wait right here for you.”

Blaine leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips, loving the sigh that escaped Kurt’s mouth. “I’d like that.”

After the bathroom door closed, Kurt sank back against the wall, closing his eyes. Life felt perfect right now. He had friends at his new college, he was in the best singing group in the country, and there was a man who felt something strong for him. He wasn’t quite sure what yet, but it seemed since Blaine’s song, their odd relationship had turned a corner. Hearing a familiar voice, he looked down the hall towards the party. Jason was coming toward him, looking concerned. He met him halfway, enjoying the slight wobbly feeling in his legs.

“Hey, what’s up?” Kurt said with a grin. He knew he must look dopey, but he didn’t care.

“Have you seen Colton? I’ve been looking for him and he’s not answering my texts,” Jason said, his eyes worried.

“I haven’t seen him for a while. I know he was dancing with a blond guy for a while. I’ll let him know you’re looking if I see him,” Kurt assured him. Jason was a born protector; he’d probably been a mother bear in another life.

“Thanks, Kurt. I’m glad you came, you look better than you have since you got here,” Jason noted with a small smile. Then his eyes clouded with worry again and he rushed off.

“I don’t know about the looking better part, but from this view I’d say you are damn sexy,” a low voice drawled behind him.

Kurt turned and looked up at the man who was standing uncomfortably close. He had medium brown hair and green eyes. He had a cocky smirk on his thin lips.

“From your coloring and the colorful accessories you’ve obtained on your neck, I’d say you’ve been one busy little cockslut, haven’t you?” The man continued, stepping even closer.

Every flag in Kurt’s protection arsenal began waving frantically. This was not a good situation and he needed to get away, now. He quickly debated the distance back toward Jason and the party or behind this guy and Blaine, who was still in the bathroom.

“Leave me alone,” he stated, looking directly into the man’s eyes. He’d been accused of ‘asking for it’, so he knew he had to be clear. “I don’t want you near me.”

“I don’t think so. Kurt, right? That’s what your friend called you. I’m Sebastian and I’m thrilled to make your acquaintance,” he said, stepping into Kurt until their toes were touching.

Kurt realized he’d been backing away when his back hit the wall. Not good, not good, he thought. Can’t be trapped, that’s not good. Opening his mouth to yell for Blaine, Sebastian slapped his hand over Kurt’s lips so hard his skin ripped under the pressure and blood leaked into Kurt’s mouth. The guy was scary strong and Kurt felt cold dread fill him. He struggled and the guy managed to keep one hand on his mouth and one hand on his chest. Please, please let Blaine come out of the bathroom, he begged the universe. Or Jason, or anyone, send anyone to help me. Opening his mouth, he tried to bite the hand holding his mouth.

Sebastian’s eyes widened and filled with lust. “Ooh, a biter. I like it. I’ve got something else you can get your lips on,” he said and slammed Kurt’s body harder against the wall. He quickly replaced his hand with his mouth, shoving his tongue into Kurt’s mouth. Kurt screamed around the invasion, pushing against the guy for all he was worth. He couldn’t get his knee up, he felt helpless as his mouth was violated. The old feelings were filling him and he began to lose the fight. He dropped his hands and let his mouth go slack, hoping the guy thought he was giving in. It worked and Kurt tried to remain calm.

“There you go, sexy, I know you’ll like it,” Sebastian said, grinning at him.

“Blaine!! Blaine, help me!” he screamed at the top of his lungs. Almost immediately he heard doors opening and people coming to investigate the sound.

“Kurt?!” he heard Blaine yell and the sound was so sweet, his eyes filled with tears of relief.

“You little slut, I’m gonna get you for this,” Sebastian growled at him, his eyes narrowed, before he turned and walked away.

Someone touched Kurt’s shoulder and he shrieked in fear as he turned. “Kurt, it’s me. What’s going on? Why the hell is your mouth bloody?” Blaine’s eyes were cold with rage.

Kurt pointed at Sebastian’s retreating back. “That guy. Sebastian. Kissed me. Couldn’t fight,” he whimpered. “I didn’t want him to. He called me a slut. I’m not, Blaine. I didn’t want him to kiss me,” he said, sobs beginning to shake his thin frame.

“I know you didn’t, Kurt. Stay right here. You,” Blaine said, pointing at two girls staring from across the hall. “You two stay here with him.” At his sharp tone, they just nodded, coming to stand next to Kurt, patting his back awkwardly.

Blaine ran down the hall, pure fury burning through his veins. The haunted look of fear and violation in Kurt’s eyes would stick with him for the rest of his life. “Sebastian,” he yelled, not clear on who he was exactly. A tall guy with sharp features turned and grinned at him before slipping into the crowd. The man’s face was imprinted in Blaine’s mind and he ran full out, not caring who he ran into. As Sebastian crossed the threshold of the dorm leading outside, Blaine leaped onto his back, knocking him to the ground. With a grunt, they hit the ground. Without a pause, Blaine pushed the guy over and sat on his chest, throwing his fists into his face so hard, blood immediately began pouring from the guys nose and mouth.

“Stupid motherfucker, you don’t touch someone if they don’t ask you to. And you especially don’t touch my man,” Blaine growled, punctuating each word with another punch.

“Blaine, security is coming,” someone from the porch yelled.

Standing up, Blaine swung his booted foot into Sebastian’s ribs. The moan of agony wasn’t nearly loud enough, but he’d quit for now. He needed to get back to Kurt. He yelled a quick thanks to the guy who had warned him and sped back through the house to the hallway. The girls were still standing there, talking quietly.

“Where is he?” Blaine demanded, looking up and down the hall.

“I don’t know,” one girl slurred.

“He ran off that way,” the other one said, pointing to the opposite side of the house. Blaine sighed and ran toward the other end, but couldn’t find Kurt. Going back to the main party, he looked around for Kurt’s roommate. Spotting the tall man wasn’t hard and Blaine made his way toward him.

“Jason, Kurt got attacked and I can’t find him. He’s okay, but I’m going to go check your guys’ room. If he texts you or you see him, call me okay?” Blaine said in a rush.

Jason’s eyes narrowed. “Who attacked him?”

“A guy named Sebastian. Right now he’s doing an imitation of a lawn ornament out front after I kicked his ass,” Blaine told him, a grim, satisfied smile on his face.

“Shit, I’ve heard of that guy. Likes to go after small guys. Okay, I’m gonna grab Colton and we’ll be there as soon as possible. I don’t want him here if Sebastian is around,” Jason said, looking to where he’d finally found him earlier. Colton waved with a drunken grin and Jason crooked his finger, his expression serious.

“You guys look around here and I’ll check your room. Call you in ten minutes,” Blaine said. Jason nodded and Blaine dashed from the house, seeing Sebastian had either left or, hopefully, was dragged off by wild dogs. Fury was still pumping through him and he kept a steady sprint going as he went to Kurt’s dorm. Taking the stairs two at a time, he made it to Kurt’s room. He tested the door, found it unlocked and stepped inside. A quick glance told him Kurt wasn’t there. He was turning to leave, wracking his mind for ideas of where he could look when a sound made him pause. It sounded like a wounded animal, the noise piercing Blaine’s heart like a dull knife. A cold brick seemed to drop in his stomach as he approached the bathroom door.

“Kurt?” he said quietly, opening the door. He stepped inside and froze, his eyes wide and his heart breaking.  “Oh Jesus, Kurt, what have you done to yourself?”

Kurt was sitting on the floor, sagged against the wall. His shirt was pulled up and his pants were unbuttoned and pushed down, exposing his abdomen and hips. Blaine couldn’t make sense of the different colors all over Kurt’s pale skin at first. Seeing a flash of silver in Kurt’s hand, he darted forward, but not soon enough. Kurt dragged the razor blade against the flesh of his stomach, moaning as blood began seeping out of the shallow wound.

“Kurt, stop, please baby, stop,” Blaine pleaded, on his knees beside Kurt. He took Kurt’s hand forcibly and removing the razor blade, throwing it in the sink nearby. Closer up he could see each individual slice in Kurt’s skin. There were at least ten fresh ones, judging by the ones that were bleeding. There were many more that were scabbed over. And surrounding those were innumerable fine white scars. Blaine felt tears well up in his eyes and he blinked them back. “Kurt, why?” he whispered.

“It won’t get out of me, Blaine,” Kurt whispered, poking the bleeding wounds. “It’s still in there.”

“What’s still in there, baby?” Blaine said, taking Kurt’s hand gently in his, desperate to help.

“The dirt. I try to get it out so it won’t build up in me, but it won’t come out this time. Blaine, why isn’t it leaving?” Kurt’s dull blue eyes were glazed over as he stared up at Blaine.

“Kurt, baby, there is no dirt in you,” Blaine said helplessly.

“Yeah there is. I can feel it in me. Makes me feel sick. They put it in me. I don’t want them to, but it just keeps happening,” Kurt muttered, closing his eyes, looking exhausted.

Blaine had never felt so lost. “Who put it in you?”

“All of them. Karofsky, Azimio, Blaine, and Seb-Sebastian,” Kurt hiccupped. “I didn’t want them to, but they did it anyway.”

Blaine blanched at his name being included in the list. Staring down at Kurt’s ripped up body in horror, he finally made the connection. He’d kissed Kurt several times and it hadn’t ended pleasantly most of the times. Had he been the cause of some of these scabs?

“My god. Kurt, I am sorry,” he whispered, staring down at the man he was pretty sure he was falling in love with. “I’m so sorry I hurt you.”

“S’okay. Tonight was nice. I didn’t know I could feel so nice. And good. You are magic, Blaine,” Kurt said, giving Blaine a tremulous smile. “I just wish the dirt would get out. It always feels better when it gets out.”

“It’s out, Kurt, it is, you can trust me,” Blaine said, rising and going to the sink. Grabbing a clean towel, he searched the cupboards for ointment and bandages. He wet the towel and lowered himself back down to Kurt. Being slow and careful, he cleaned each of the small wounds, grateful that at least they didn’t look like they needed stitches. He rinsed the towel out several times, trying to ignore the pink water swirling down the sink. He dabbed ointment onto all of the cuts, even the scabbed over ones and put band aids over the worst of them.

“Come on, let’s get you into bed,” Blaine said, gently helping Kurt stand. Kurt wobbled and Blaine swept his arm behind Kurt’s legs and picked him up. Nuzzling into Blaine’s chest, Kurt sighed. Tears escaped Blaine’s  eyes as he looked down at Kurt, cuddled into him so trustingly. Sitting him on the bed, he helped him take off his shirt, pants, and boots. Kurt pointed out his drawer of pajamas and Blaine picked out the loosest looking pants and a baggy t-shirt. Pouting at the plain clothes, Kurt let Blaine help him get dressed. Pulling the blankets back, he got Kurt settled in and covered up.

“I’ll be right back,” Blaine said quietly. “I just need to wash my hands.” He went into the bathroom and cleaned up the specks of blood on the floor and the bandage wrappers. Washing his hands in the sink, he stared at the silver razor blade that was stained with Kurt’s blood. He wrapped it in toilet paper and stuck it in his pocket. Knowing that Kurt had obviously been cutting for some time, he realized there had to be more blades somewhere. It didn’t take him long to find the small black box that was filled with silver razor blades, some loose, some still in packages. He leaned against the sink, letting the tears fall for a moment. All this time, he’d been a prick to Kurt, having no idea that Kurt was hurting himself in response. Regret, hurt, and guilt ate at his heart. That beautiful, generous, compassionate, talented man was slowly torturing himself in response to other people’s acts against him. Sticking the box in his back pocket, he went back to see if Kurt was still awake. His eyes were closed and he was breathing slowly, so Blaine started to leave.

“Sing to me,” Kurt said quietly before he reached the door.

“Um. Okay. What do you want to hear?” Blaine asked, coming back to sit on the edge of the bed. Kurt looked so small, so childlike in that moment.

“Anything,” he muttered, reaching out  and taking Blaine’s hand in his.

Blaine reached over and ran his hand over Kurt’s face, tracing it’s shape. He opened his mouth and sang the first words that came to him.

_Time, is going by, so much faster than I,_

_And I'm starting to regret not spending all of it with you._

_Now I'm, wondering why, I've kept this bottled inside,_

_So I'm starting to regret not telling all of this to you._

_So if I haven't yet, I've gotta let you know..._

_You're never gonna be alone_

_From this moment on, if you ever feel like letting go,_

_I won't let you fall..._

_You're never gonna be alone_

_I'll hold you 'til the hurt is gone._

Kurt smiled sweetly at him, opening his eyes for a moment before letting his lashes flutter shut. Blaine kept singing, realizing he was telling Kurt the truth.

_And now, as long as I can, I'm holding on with both hands,_

_'Cause forever I believe that there's nothing I could need but you,_

_So if I haven't yet, I've gotta let you know..._

_You're never gonna be alone_

_From this moment on, if you ever feel like letting go,_

_I won't let you fall._

_When all hope is gone, I know that you can carry on._

_We're gonna see the world out,_

_I'll hold you 'til the hurt is gone._

Blaine could see Kurt had fallen asleep, his hand going loose in Blaine’s and his face relaxed. Pushing Kurt’s hair back, needing to touch him, he continued to sing, tears streaming down his face.

_You've gotta live every single day,_

_Like it's the only one, what if tomorrow never comes?_

_Don't let it slip away,_

_Could be our only one, you know it's only just begun._

_Every single day,_

_Maybe our only one, what if tomorrow never comes?_

_Tomorrow never comes..._

The words couldn’t be truer. What if tomorrow never came for Kurt? What if he pushed his body too far? Blaine felt sick at the thought of losing the best thing that had ever happened to him. Why? Why did this have to happen to Kurt? Why couldn’t Blaine have treated him decently?

_Time, is going by, so much faster than I,_

_And I'm starting to regret not telling all of this to you._

_You're never gonna be alone_

_From this moment on, if you ever feel like letting go,_

_I won't let you fall._

_When all hope is gone, I know that you can carry on._

_We're gonna see the world out,_

_I'll hold you 'til the hurt is gone._

_I'm gonna be there always,_

_I won't be missing one more day,_

_I'm gonna be there always,_

_I won't be missing one more day._

 

He promised these words to Kurt. He wouldn’t miss one more day of life without Kurt in it. He would do whatever he had to ensure Kurt’s safety and happiness. Staring down at that angelic face, he knew that as long as Kurt would let him, he’d be here for him. Taking out his phone, he texted Jason, knowing it had been longer than the ten minutes he’d promised. He told him Kurt was home and in bed. Jason replied back that he was going to stay in Colton’s room that night. The other man had drunk too much and was sick, so Jason would stay and take care of him. Blaine shot another text back saying he’d be staying in the room with Kurt, just in case he needed anything. Jason thanked him and promised to be back in the morning. Blaine sat there, looking at Kurt. His Kurt. His hands flexed unconsciously. He would kill Sebastian if he ever saw him again. He would hurt anyone who gave his man even a split second of unhappiness. Standing, he grabbed Kurt’s jeans off the floor and found his keys. He locked Kurt’s room and ran out of the dorm, not wanting to be gone too long. He found the Dumpster and threw the black box and the wadded up tissue into it. Saying a silent prayer that this would be the end of it, he hurried back to Kurt. Coming in the room quietly, he saw Kurt was looking restless, a worried look on his face. Blaine lowered himself down next to Kurt, pulling him into his arms. Kurt took a deep breath in through his nose, like he was sniffing Blaine. Then his arm wrapped around Blaine’s waist and his head nuzzled closer until he was tucked into Blaine’s side. A contented sigh left him as he settled back into sleep. Blaine smiled down at him for a moment.

Now came the question. What did he do? Did he tell someone? Did Kurt need to get help? He had no idea. He decided to talk to Jason in the morning. He was a trustworthy guy who really seemed to like Kurt.  Satisfied that he had at least that much planned, he closed his eyes, holding Kurt closer to him, trying to wrap as much of himself around Kurt as possible.

“I’m so sorry, Kurt,” Blaine whispered to the sleeping man. “I promise you that I will never hurt you again.”

Kissing the top of his head, Blaine closed his eyes and let himself drift to sleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I guess we could call this chapter The Aftermath. I’m going to play around with my OC’s to start. Let me know what you think; if you’d like to hear more of their story, along the sidelines of the MC’s.

Jason woke in the dark, hearing a strange sound. For a moment he wondered where he was. The bed under him was bare, no sheets, and the only thing covering him was a throw blanket. It came back to him quickly. Colton had gotten drunk and when Jason had walked him home, he’d gotten sick so Jason had stuck around to help him. Colton had no roommate, so he crashed on the extra bed instead of going back to his room. He had never trusted Blaine, but the look in the other man’s eyes when he’d been looking for Kurt told him there was another side to him. Jason trusted him to care for his roommate until he could get back to him in the morning. Hearing the noise again, Jason realized it was coming from Colton. He was whimpering in his sleep, thrashing around, obviously in the throes of a nightmare. Something in the shorter man brought out all of his protective instincts and he couldn’t help going over and sitting on the edge of his bed. Sweeping his red hair out of his face, he murmured comforting words, telling Colton he would be okay. Colton sighed in his sleep and grabbed hold of Jason’s hand. Turning over, Jason was forced to lean over the other man, just to keep his arm in his socket. Being put in an odd position, he shrugged to himself. Slipping under the covers, he stretched his long body out next to him, letting Colton keep his arm tucked around his chest, his hand resting over the younger man’s heart. Jason slid his other arm under Colton’s pillow and settled in. Colton gave a contented murmur and snuggled his body backward into Jason’s warmth. Jason realized he was spooning another man. While he had no problem with who people loved, he himself had never felt any stirring toward other guys. Women were his thing, blondes and redheads preferably. Since he’d met Colton, they’d been hanging out so much Jason hadn’t had as much time to date, not that he minded. Colton was sweet, funny, and loved model cars as much as he did. They spent hours putting together the plastic cars. Jason loved to watch him paint the tiniest parts of the engines, his small hands sure and steady. He was amazingly talented. Whenever they had coffee or went out for lunch, their size difference became laughably noticeable, causing comments and chuckles from people around them. Colton was almost an entire foot shorter than he was. It was very obvious now as Colton continued to try and cuddle closer to him. His head was now resting on Jason’s bicep, and his ass was tucked against his stomach. It would make an interesting problem if they ever had sex. Jason froze as he realized what he just thought. Had he seriously just thought about having sex with Colton? He wasn’t gay. But yes, his body was now responding to the idea, the thought of being with the small man tucked in his arms. He had to remind himself that it didn’t matter about gender, it mattered who you cared about. He knew he cared about Colton and he knew that Colton cared for him. And apparently he was attracted to Colton as well. Snuggled up like this felt strange and different, but somehow right. Shaking his head, he decided the middle of the night wasn’t the time to figure out what was going on in his head. Leaning over, he rested his head against the back of Colton’s head, enjoying the scent of his shampoo. He allowed his body to sink into Colton’s until it seemed they were one. Strangely comfortable, he quickly fell asleep, not seeing the sleepy sweet smile on Colton’s face.

 

. . . . .

 

The sun was just coming up when Blaine awoke, Kurt still wrapped around his body. One of his thighs was resting across Blaine’s crotch. Being morning meant some interesting sensations were going on. He was hard as a rock due to morning and the man he was snuggled up to. Kurt was so warm, soft, and he smelled amazing. When the full memories of the night before came back to him, he wanted to slap himself. He couldn’t be horny after watching this boy slice himself up, partly because of him! Sick bastard, he told himself. He took a few minutes to control his body until it was calm and behaving again. Gazing into Kurt’s face, he wondered when he’d stopped hating Kurt. Things had seemed to change so quickly. He’d been insulting him regularly and then he was thinking about him all the time. He knew he’d hurt Kurt after the kiss and made his singing team change songs just so he could apologize to him. That must have been when his feelings changed from irritation to caring. And last night, before the attack. That dance. The moments in that room. Kurt had given so freely of himself, undemanding, pure in his feelings. The way he’d shared himself with Blaine had been amazing. Blaine couldn’t even imagine how mind blowing it might be if they made love. As much as his cynical side hated it, yes, it would be making love, not having sex. This boy deserved the best of everything Blaine could offer. And if they ever had the chance to be intimate, he deserved to be cherished, adored, and worshiped. He gently brushed his lips over Kurt’s forehead, enjoying the tiny smile that lifted his full lips in sleep.

Now, he had to talk with Kurt about what happened. He knew it was early and Kurt needed to sleep, but he had a feeling he wouldn’t talk as freely if Jason was here. They would need to have this conversation soon and he had no idea how it would end up. He could only hope Kurt would open up to him and let him help. Blaine was used to knowing what to do in any situation. Add a touch of cynicism to anything and it usually worked out. But this time, he was at a loss. For a moment he wished he was closer to his mother, a psychologist. She would probably know exactly what to do. But she wanted to deal with Blaine about as much as he wanted to deal with her.

Laying there, he let Kurt sleep another hour, watching his shallow breathing, enjoying the small noises he made and how he constantly tried to cuddle closer to Blaine. He would never get tired of his scent, the feel of his body next to his. Blaine was falling in love, no matter how much he might have mocked himself even a week ago. Everything changed, he changed. His life was not just about him anymore, it was about Kurt and him. Kurt’s needs mattered to him and he would do whatever it took to make him happy.

When he knew the time was coming when Jason might come home, he began lightly kissing Kurt’s forehead and cheeks.

“Kurt,” he said gently. “Time to wake up, baby,” he continued. Since when did he call Kurt baby? And why did it feel totally natural to him? Man, if he knew what he’d be saying a week ago, he would have kicked his own ass for sure.

“Mmm,” Kurt moaned. “Not yet. Comfy.” He burrowed his head into Blaine’s chest, breathing deeply.

“Come on, Kurt. Time to wake up. Open those peepers,” Blaine smiled at him. He was too adorable for words in the morning. A slight flush on his pale cheeks, his eyes blinking drowsily at him, his hair for once a tangled mess, standing up in places. Blaine wanted to run his fingers through his hair and kiss him. “We need to talk, Kurt.”

Kurt woke up fully at those words, not wanting to confront the emotions and actions of the previous night. “I don’t want to talk about it, Blaine.”

“I know. I, I just need to know. How long has this been going on?” Blaine asked, hoping the questions wouldn’t push him away.

“About a year,” he whispered, keeping his head tucked into Blaine’s chest.

“How did it start,” Blaine whispered back.

“A guy at my high school, Karofsky, started bullying me. Shoving me, name calling, the normal stuff I was pretty used to. I confronted him one time and he kissed me. I fought him off and after that the bullying got worse,” Kurt said all of this in quiet tones. Blaine’s blood was on fire and it took everything in him to not leap up and find the asshole and rip him limb from limb. He didn’t say anything though, Kurt was opening up and this was what needed to happen. “One day, him and Azimio, both of them were on the football team, they cornered me after school. Azimio took my pants. I was crying and saying no, but they didn’t listen. Azimio held me down, Karofsky tried to, tried to. He almost got it in, but then someone came along. He told me I’d asked for it. I didn’t though. I never wanted anything to do with those guys. I never told that Karofsky kissed me. I figured he was in the closet and just confused. But then after what they tried to do… I felt so disgusting, so dirty. Karofsky’s voice kept going through my mind, telling me I’d asked for it. I was in the shower and saw my uncle’s razor. I just did it. One little slice. It felt so good. Cleansing in a way. The pain of it took away from the pain of, of what happened. I didn’t intend to keep doing it, but every time I would think of it or when Karofsky would bully me again, I just did it. He threatened to kill me if I told and I did then, too. It was my way of coping and it has been ever since.”

He stopped talking and just lay there breathing against Blaine. He’d never told anyone this. It felt nice to get it all out in the open. He was just afraid that now Blaine would jump out of the bed and run. Kurt couldn’t blame him.

“Kurt, I’m so sorry this all happened to you. You know that none of that was your fault, right? It was those guys who did wrong, me who did wrong, Sebastian who did wrong. We were the perpetrators. You were the victim,” Blaine said forcefully, taking Kurt’s chin and forcing their eyes to meet. He despised the fact that his name had to be added in, but it was true. It would never be true again, but it didn’t make up for what had already happened.

“Do you still like me?” Kurt asked hesitantly, his eyes full of fear and doubt.

Blaine’s heart broke. “Of course I still do. I like you even more for being honest and sharing with me. I admire you so much, Kurt. You’ve been through so much. You’re so much stronger than anyone I know,” Blaine said. It was the truth.

“Kiss me,” Kurt whispered.

 “You sure?” Blaine wanted nothing more, but needed to know he gave his full consent.

“Yes. Kiss me, please, Blaine,” Kurt said, lifting his chin toward Blaine.

Blaine stared at his full lips for a moment, soft, slightly open. He could deny him nothing and he leaned down and gently kissed him, a soft brushing of lips, before sitting back.

Kurt took his arm and tugged. “More kisses,” he said, a smile on his lips.

Blaine groaned. He took Kurt’s mouth with a bit more force, but still tried to keep it light. The man had just been forced the night before and Blaine didn’t want to trigger any thoughts of it. But there was no way he could resist tasting his lips.

Kurt lightly brushed his tongue along the seam of Blaine’s lips, moaning softly. Blaine gave in and opened his mouth, allowing Kurt to take it where he wanted. Sighing heavily, Kurt slipped his hot tongue in Blaine’s mouth and immediately began massaging their tongues together. Before he realized what happened, Blaine found Kurt laying out on top of him, Kurt’s hands holding the sides of his head. Blaine’s hands had wandered down and rested gently on the small of Kurt’s back. They continued kissing, Kurt dipping, thrusting, and exploring Blaine’s mouth. A groan escaped one of them and Blaine had no idea who. All he knew was this soft, beautiful boy on top of him was driving him crazy.

“Blaine,” Kurt muttered roughly. He spread his legs over Blaine’s waist and suddenly he was rotating his hips, undulating against Blaine’s now hard cock. He could feel Kurt’s hard on and he groaned at the sensation. “Let me make you happy,” Kurt said.

Blaine tried to think clearly. Would it harm Kurt to do something sexual after being attacked? What about his cuts? Would Blaine hurt him?

“No thinking,” Kurt whispered against his ear with a thrust of his hips. “Just feeling. No sex. Let me make you happy.”

“Yes,” Blaine said, hoping it was the right decision and wondered at them repeating each other’s lines. He refused to admit it was cute.

Kurt grinned down at him, triumphant. He reached for the buttons on Blaine’s jeans, quickly undoing them. Rising up on his knees, he and Blaine slid his pants down to his knees, kicking them off onto the floor before sliding his shirt over his head. With some creative maneuvering, Kurt managed to get his shirt and pants off without leaving the warmth of Blaine’s body. At the same time, they seemed to realize they’d never seen each other naked. They took a moment, just staring at each other.

Kurt took a gasping breath, his gaze taking in the deep olive toned skin stretched over taut muscles. His abs were clearly defined as was the V between his hip bones. He traced that line and was pleased when Blaine cried out.

Blaine couldn’t believe the utter beauty of the man above him. He was perfection. Pale skin, flat, but nicely defined stomach. He tried to look past the bandages and scars and took in his long, pink cock, resting against Blaine’s thigh. It had a dew drop of liquid at its tip and Blaine wanted nothing more than to lap it up. He settled for reaching down and swiping his fingers over Kurt’s cock and quickly putting his fingers in his mouth. The salty taste was heavenly and totally Kurt. Kurt had gasped and moaned deep in his throat when Blaine had tasted him.

Kurt watched Blaine sucking his fingers dry of Kurt’s taste and was astounded by the lust that seemed to burn through his veins. He wanted to taste Blaine as well, so without asking, he slid down and took Blaine’s long, thick length into his mouth. Never having done it before, he worked on pure instinct, swirling his tongue around the head of his cock.

“Kurt, my god!” Blaine grunted. “You don’t have to do that, baby, come here,” he said, pulling Kurt away from his cock, so freaking close to coming it was ridiculous.

“I wanted to taste you too. I like your taste,” Kurt said, his eyes glazed with passion.

Blaine moaned at his honesty and brought their mouths together. They lapped at each other, tasting themselves on their tongues. Kurt had left enough moisture on Blaine’s cock so when their cocks rubbed together, they slid against each other effortlessly. Their mouths broke apart as they both moaned. Kurt rose up a little and began undulating his hips against Blaine’s, their eyes never leaving each other. More moisture came from their cocks creating enough lubrication to make it pleasurable. Kurt’s hips were magic, the way he could rotate and swivel on Blaine’s body. The erotic vision of their cocks sliding together and Kurt moaning above him proved too much. He cried out Kurt’s name and came between them, spraying them both. Kurt watched him come, fascinated. He leaned down and licked through one of the white streaks on Blaine’s chest. When he sat back up, he stared into Blaine’s eyes, licked his lips and came hard, crying out as his come mingled with Blaine’s. Uncaring about the mess, Kurt collapsed on Blaine’s chest, breathing hard.

“You are amazing,” Blaine muttered.

“Right back at you,” Kurt said, moving his head to nibble at Blaine’s neck.

“We need a shower,” Blaine said and Kurt whined at the thought of moving.

Blaine hesitated, knowing the bathroom might make Kurt remember too much of last night. Maybe they could create a new memory. He eased Kurt to the side and stood before sweeping Kurt into his arms, reminding them both of the night before.

He ran them a shower and they took turns washing each other. Kurt even let him wash over his cuts, trying to be gentle. Kurt didn’t even blink at the sting he must have been feeling. It told Blaine how used to the pain he was and he felt sick. Nobody should have to torture themselves just to deal with how other people treat them.

Kurt couldn’t believe how gentle and caring Blaine was being. He’d always been terrified of the thought of being naked in front of someone else. But the way Blaine seemed to accept him and support what he’d been through had pushed him to do what he’d really wanted to do. And it had been beautiful. Blaine was beautiful. Strong, protective, sweet, all of the things Kurt wanted in life. He didn’t know what this made them. Boyfriends? Friends with benefits? He didn’t know, but as long as Blaine played some part in his life, he’d be happy. He left Blaine in the shower to rinse off and stepped out of the shower. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he went to the sink and wiped the steam off of it. Reaching into the cupboard underneath for his moisturizer, he saw that something was missing. It took him a moment before he realized that the black box was gone. His stomach seemed to drop out of his body.

“Blaine,” he said evenly.

Blaine had just shut the shower off and was stepping out to grab a towel. “Yeah?” he said with a soft smile at Kurt, which he didn’t return.

“Where is it?” Kurt demanded.

“Where is what?” Blaine asked, his head tilting.

“You know damn well what, Blaine. The box. Where is the box?” Kurt said loudly, just short of a full yell.

Blaine sighed. “I threw it away. I thought it would help you stop if they weren’t so readily available.”

“Who said I needed to stop? And who the hell asked you to butt into my business and decide what was best for me?” Kurt was yelling now.

“Kurt, listen to me,” Blaine said, coming over, wrapping a towel around his hips. Kurt refused to let his attention wander to the streams of water still dripping down his muscular chest. “Kurt the cutting isn’t good for you. Let me help you find other ways to deal with your feelings. I want to help you.”

“I didn’t ask for your help! How dare you! I trusted you, Blaine. I thought you cared about me, even just a little,” Kurt said, tears forming in his eyes.

“Kurt, please. I do care about you. More than a little. Don’t do this. We’ll find another way, you don’t have to do this to yourself,” Blaine pleaded helplessly.

“If you cared, you wouldn’t have thrown that box away. Damn you! Get out of my room,” he yelled pointing toward the door.

“Kurt, please,” Blaine said, coming toward him.

Kurt shook his head and backed away. “Get out. I mean it, Blaine.”

Blaine knew that Kurt needed to see that his wishes would be respected so he nodded and went to the bedroom to pull on his dirty clothes. He shoved his boxers in his pocket and left the room. He closed the door and promptly took a seat on the floor next to the door. He still intended to talk to Jason and wouldn’t miss his chance to do so. Hearing Kurt’s stereo come on, he listened to the song he picked. Kurt didn’t seem to be the rock type, but the Evanescence song was a good one. As he truly listened to the lyrics, though, his blood ran cold.

 

_I tried to kill my pain_

_But only brought more_

_So much more_

_I lay dying_

_And I'm pouring crimson regret and betrayal_

_I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming_

_Am I too lost to be saved?_

_Am I too lost?_

_My God my tourniquet_

_Return to me salvation_

_My God my tourniquet_

_Return to me salvation_

_Do you remember me?_

_Lost for so long_

_Will you be on the other side_

_Or will you forget me?_

_I'm dying, praying, bleeding and screaming_

_Am I too lost to be saved?_

_Am I too lost?_

_My God my tourniquet_

_Return to me salvation_

_My God my tourniquet_

_Return to me salvation_

_I want to die!!!_

Kurt had been singing along quietly but that last line, he yelled along with the song. Blaine felt tears running down his face. How the hell could he fix this?

_My God my tourniquet_

_Return to me salvation_

_My God my tourniquet_

_Return to me salvation_

_My wounds cry for the grave_

_My soul cries for deliverance_

_Will I be denied Christ_

_Tourniquet_

_My suicide_

 

Blaine’s shoulders shook with the force of his sobs and his fear. He knew what he had to do now. As much as he didn’t want to. He heard footsteps approaching and looked up to see Jason coming toward him. He jumped up and met him halfway.

“We need to talk before you go in there,” Blaine said, uncaring that he still had tears on his face.

Jason took in his appearance and nodded. They walked to the stairwell and sat down. Blaine began to talk. He told Jason everything, promising him to silence. He asked him to not talk to Kurt about it, but to please keep an eye on him. Jason, in shock, promised and asked Blaine what he intended to do. Blaine told him he would get Kurt help.

Later, in his room, Blaine took out his phone with a heavy sigh. This is for Kurt, he reminded himself and dialed the number.

“Yes, Blaine?” Her voice was always so proper.

“Mom?” Blaine’s voice broke.

“Blaine? What is it?” her voice showed actual concern.

“Mom, I need you,” Blaine said through tears.

**.....**

**My Suicide - Evanescence**


	8. Chapter 8

Blaine spent over an hour on the phone with his mother. They discussed nothing but Kurt and his situation, but Blaine could honestly say it was the best conversation they’d ever had. His mom had listened intently and given concise and caring advice. When she said she was glad that he’d thought to call her, he knew that was her way of saying she was proud of him. He sat there in his room for a few minutes, soaking it in. Knowing there was a way to help Kurt gave him hope, knowing his mom was supporting him gave him strength. The one thing she said would help Kurt the most is him having someone to talk to. Someone outside his personal life. Cutting was usually attributed to the need for an outlet for emotions and feeling like there is none. It sounded exactly like what Kurt was dealing with. He felt shame from the way he was abused and had no way to get out the feelings, other than to make himself bleed. She had also told him she’d look into some counselors in their area that he could take Kurt to, if he’d go. Blaine was determined that he’d either go or he’d carry his ass there. Either way, he would get help. For now, he would just be whatever Kurt needed. But even if Kurt needed him to be away, he would stay close. Jason had already texted him reporting in that Kurt had eaten breakfast, though not much. He quickly responded asking for updates through the day. He had somewhere to be, business to take care of. He made a couple of phone calls, thankful for once at the money that was readily available to him. Smiling grimly, he left campus to watch his dollars put into action via video phone.

 

. . . . .

 

“Hey Kurt, didn’t you grow up in Lima, Ohio?” Colton asked from Jason’s bed where he was painting a tiny engine. “They’re talking about it on the news.”

“I did. Turn it up, would you?” Kurt said, curiosity breaking through the haze his mind had been in all afternoon.

Colton turned the volume up on the TV and they saw the news anchor talking about a gang attack in Lima, Ohio.

“Several sources claim that a large gang of men, all in dark hooded sweatshirts, came out of nowhere and began beating the two college freshman. David Karofsky and Azimio Adams lived through the brutal attack, though they will both most likely have lasting effects. Adams hands were crushed beyond recognition and Karofsky experienced a severely fractured pelvis, among many other injuries. When asked if they recognized the assailants, both victims and neighbors in the area were unable to identify a single perpetrator. ‘It was like they were ghosts who came, beat the crap out of the guys, and disappeared again,’ one man said. Police are asking for anyone with any information to please come forward. In other news,” the anchor continued.

Kurt was staring at the TV, his face pale. Getting up, he rushed from the room. Having never been to Blaine’s room before, he had to stop and ask for directions a couple of times before reaching the room. Banging on the door, he jumped back when Wes opened the door.

“Kurt, what’s up?” Wes asked, seeing the man’s pale face.

“Um, does Blaine live here?”

“Yeah. He’s not here right now. He’s been gone all day as far as I know. Want me to tell him you stopped by?” Wes offered.

Kurt shook his head. “No thank you. I’m sorry to bother you,” he said and turned away. He didn’t feel like returning to the room right away so he made his way to the café, hoping coffee would warm him up inside. After paying for his drink, he left the building and began walking the grounds of the college. It was freezing outside, but he didn’t seem to feel it. Something told him Blaine knew exactly what happened to Azimio and Karofsky. And how crappy of a person did it make Kurt if he was secretly celebrating that now those two would have nightmares to relive every day of their lives? If Blaine had been home, would he have yelled at him or thanked him? He had no idea. Kicking some leaves around, he knew he was definitely grateful in a way. Nobody had ever made such an effort to protect or defend him. It was a nice feeling, a safe feeling. He sipped his coffee and smiled. Who knew how long Blaine would be nice to him, but he would enjoy it while it lasted.

“Kurt! Wait up!”

Kurt turned, still smiling to see Blaine jogging toward him. He couldn’t hide how happy he was to see the other man. He tossed his coffee cup in a nearby trashcan and went to meet Blaine.

“How are – ooph!” Blaine got out as Kurt wrapped his arms around him and squeezed hard.

“Thank you,” Kurt whispered in his ear.

“Not that I don’t love the fact that you’re grateful, cuz I do, but what for?” Blaine asked, hugging him back, enjoying the slim frame resting safely against his.

Kurt stepped back and looked him in the eye. “You know what I’m talking about. It was on the news, Blaine.”

Blaine’s eyebrows went up. “Shit. No kidding? Huh. Well, officially, I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said. The news? Holy crap. Let’s hope his mom didn’t hear about this. She might make the connection after he’d just gotten done telling her about Kurt’s history in Lima.

“Unofficially?” Kurt asked softly.

“Unofficially, I would do anything to protect you,” Blaine said fiercely. He brought Kurt in for another hug and they just stood there for a moment, sharing in each other’s warmth. “Kurt, about this morning,” he began.

“Don’t,” Kurt muttered. “I don’t want to ruin this moment by getting mad at you again. I like how I feel right now too much.”

Blaine smiled into his hair. “Gotcha. How would it feel if I kissed you?”

Kurt leaned back and smirked at him. “Depends on how well you do it.”

Blaine laughed, seeing a familiar spark in his beautiful blue eyes. “Well, I’ll do my best,” he said and brushed his lips against Kurt’s. They both sighed at the contact. Their lips moved softly against each other for a moment until Blaine realized Kurt was shaking.

“Kurt? Baby, you’re freezing!” he said, realizing Kurt was there in nothing but a shirt and a thin cardigan. He slipped his coat off and threw it around Kurt’s shoulders.

“I had to get out, I didn’t think I’d be going outside,” Kurt said through chattering teeth. He slid his arms gratefully into the coat, taking a moment to inhale Blaine’s warm, masculine scent.

“That was a dumbass thing to do,” Blaine chastised.

“I forgot a coat while you pulled together a gang beating and _I’m_ the dumbass?” Kurt covering his harsh words with a grin.

Blaine laughed. “Fine. I’m the dumbass. You’re just dumb, now let’s get you inside,” he said, keeping an arm around Kurt as they walked.

“I’m not dumb,” Kurt mumbled, throwing his hip into Blaine’s, making him stumble.

“You little shit,” Blaine said with a laugh as Kurt danced away from him.

Kurt giggled, feeling free in that moment. He ran the rest of the way to the building and let Blaine catch him as they got inside the doors. Blaine’s cheeks were pink from the cold air, his golden eyes sparkling like gems. He wrapped his hands around Blaine’s neck and pulled him in for a kiss. Their lips finally began warming up against each other, tingling with the temperature change. It made the kiss that much more interesting. Blaine wanted to sink his tongue into Kurt’s warm mouth, but everything for now had to be on Kurt’s timing. He’d just make sure he was ready and waiting for whatever he wanted. And he hoped Kurt wanted some tongue because he was dying for another taste of him. After a few more minutes of kissing, their breath coming hot between them, Kurt moaned and pulled his head away.

“Am I doing something wrong?” he asked, looking frustrated.

“No, baby, why?” Blaine responded. Kurt was doing everything right as his tight pants could attest to.

“You aren’t, I mean, you haven’t,” Kurt stammered, his face turning bright red. “You aren’t French kissing me,” he whispered, leaning into Blaine so he could hear.

Blaine held back a chuckle. Kurt was so innocent and adorable. “Baby, I’m just letting you take your time is all. I don’t want you to feel rushed or pressured into anything. No big deal. If you want French kissing, I’ll give it to you,” he said honestly.

He wasn’t prepared for Kurt’s hand in his hair, tugging his head back in. “Then give it to me,” he growled.

Blaine gasped in shock at the sensation and the sound of Kurt’s voice so deep and throaty. He didn’t hesitate but slanted their lips together, plunging his tongue deep into Kurt’s mouth. Kurt kept his hand buried in his hair lightly pulling and pushing against Blaine’s head as their mouths moved together. Their tongues danced, writhed and swirled against each other until both men were breathless, leaning their foreheads together as they tried to calm down.

“Blaine?” Kurt breathed.

“Yeah?”

“What am I to you?”

Blaine hesitated, unsure how to answer. “You’re mine,” he finally said with a shrug.

Kurt sighed happily. “Yours,” he agreed.

Blaine kissed him tenderly. “Only if you want to be.”

“More than anything,” Kurt whispered, his eyes shining with emotion.

“Good. I want you to be,” he replied quietly.

“Yours,” Kurt repeated, bringing their lips back together. The kiss was soft and unbelievably tender.

Kurt heard his phone beep and dug it out to read the text. “Oh! Blaine?”

“Yeah?” Blaine said, wondering at the delighted look on his face.

“I completely forgot about this! Will you, um, would you like to be my date? My team has tickets to see Wicked tonight and I’m allowed one extra ticket. Will you go with me?” his eyes were suddenly unsure.

Blaine took his chin and kissed him gently. “I would love to.”

“Really?” Kurt said ecstatically.

“Really,” Blaine chuckled. It took so little to make Kurt happy and it at once delighted him and broke his heart, knowing he hadn’t had much chance for joy in his short life.

“Oh my gosh! There’s only three hours until we leave!” Kurt said, sounding panicked.

“What are you talking about? What do you mean only?” Blaine asked, confused and worried.

“I only have three hours to figure out what I’m going to wear!” Kurt wailed and began racing up the stairs toward his room. “Pick me up at seven, okay?”

Blaine let out the breath he was holding and smiled. “See you at seven,” he called, though Kurt was already around the corner. A thought occurred to him and he ran back out the door.

. . . . .

Blaine knocked on the door precisely at seven and Jason opened it with a smile. “Looking good, Anderson,” he said, letting him in.

“Thanks man. Is he ready?” he asked, not seeing Kurt in the room.

“Yes, I am,” Kurt announced from the bathroom door. He was dressed in a stunning black and red suit that was tailored to perfection.

“Wow, Kurt, just wow,” Blaine muttered. Kurt was radiant under the praise and gave him a brilliant smile. “Um, here,” Blaine said, holding the single rose out.

“Oh, Blaine, that’s so sweet,” Kurt exclaimed, sniffing delicately at the flower. “It smells amazing. Colton, do you think you could put this in some water?” Colton nodded and took the rose from him. “Blaine, I had no idea you cleaned up so well, you look amazing,” Kurt complimented him. Blaine was in a thin cut black suit, simple but very elegant.

“You guys look wonderful together,” Colton agreed, coming back in the room with the rose in a glass. Kurt took it and put it on his night table.

“Thank you,” Kurt said, coming to take Blaine’s hand.

“Hey, hold on you crazy kids,” Jason said, pulling out a camera. He snapped a couple pictures of them before shooing them out the door. Blaine helped Kurt back into his jacket, which didn’t go with his suit, but Kurt looked like he couldn’t care less.

“I swear he was a mom in another life,” Blaine commented with a smile.

“I agree. I’m surprised he doesn’t check behind my ears when I get out of the shower,” Kurt said, his voice more light and carefree than Blaine had ever heard.

As they reached the bottom of the stairs, the other winning Warbler’s and their dates were chattering excitedly and pointing at the door.

“What’s going on?” Kurt asked, trying to see.

“Well, I know I always ragged on you about being a princess, and I won’t anymore. But I figured you should have at least one ride in a chariot,” Blaine said, walking through the group and opening the door. A black stretch Hummer was waiting for them outside. Kurt gasped and couldn’t prevent himself from hopping up and down, clapping in excitement.

“Blaine, it’s perfect, thank you!” he said, going to him and kissing him on the cheek before rushing out to the limo.

The whole evening was perfect in Kurt’s estimation. They all had dinner together and rode to the show, delighting over New York from the windows of the limo. Blaine held his hand or had an arm wrapped around him at all times. Kurt had never felt so cherished. The show was extraordinary, as he’d always known it would be. He’d seen it in Columbus, but somehow, seeing it actually on Broadway brought a new magic to the performance. Blaine squeezed his hand when he teared up during his favorite songs and shocked him by offering him a handkerchief. The ride back to campus was more subdued as people got snuggly with their dates. When they got back, everyone thanked Blaine, who looked embarrassed at the attention.

Blaine walked Kurt to his room, where they spent several minutes kissing outside. “Would you spend the night with me? Just to sleep,” Kurt asked.

“I’d love to,” Blaine said, brushing his lips over Kurt’s forehead.

Kurt beamed and put his finger to his lips as he quietly unlocked the door. They snuck inside, bumping into each other in the dark, trying not to laugh. Kurt turned his lamp on, hoping the dark shade would keep it from waking up his roommate. He turned to Blaine whose mouth was wide open. He turned to Jason’s side of the room and gasped. Jason was asleep, wrapped around Colton, his arm and leg draped over the smaller man. Kurt’s gasp made them stir, but only to move in closer to each other.

“I wonder how long this has been going on,” Kurt breathed at Blaine.

“At least they’re dressed,” Blaine whispered in his ear. Kurt nodded in agreement. They stripped and put pajamas from Kurt’s drawer on and slid into the bed.

“This has been the best day ever,” Kurt whispered, snuggling into Blaine’s chest.

“Well, then I know what I have to top now,” Blaine replied, kissing Kurt’s head.

“I know what you could top,” Kurt said suggestively, turning to look up at Blaine with a grin.

Blaine groaned quietly. “Go to sleep, Kurt.”

Kurt giggled quietly, but tucked himself back into Blaine and quickly fell asleep.

Thanks to Kurt’s comment, it took Blaine several moments to take control of his body before succumbing to sleep, a content smile on his face.

 

 

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

Hands grasping, clawing at him, at his face, his skin. They were laughing at him, taunting him for thinking he could get away from them. Hazy faces pushing at him, enjoying the pain pulsing through his body. He cried out, screaming at the top of his lungs, but he knew it would do no good. This was where he would spend eternity. There would be no escape.

“Kurt,” they taunted, pulling at him.

“Come on, Kurt,” voices kept calling as they were pushing at him, hurting him.

“Kurt, baby, wake up!”It sounded like one of his attackers, it couldn’t be trusted.

“Kurt, it’s Jason and Blaine, come on, buddy, you gotta wake up,” a familiar voice said.

“Jason?” he asked, wondering what was going on.

“It’s me, bud, open those peepers for me,” Jason said warmly. He sighed in relief as Kurt’s eyes fluttered open. “Hey there good looking, you had us pretty worried. Helluva nightmare you were having, huh?”

“Are you and Colton screwing?” Kurt asked blearily, his mind a haze.

He heard a choked off chuckle, a gasp, and a half shriek.

“Um, well, the answer to that is no. But I thank you for showing us that you are, indeed, awake,” Jason said diplomatically, his face fire-engine red.

“I’m sorry, Jason. Colton. My brain’s kinda fuzzy,” Kurt mumbled.

“It’s okay, baby, we knew it would be awkward this morning, we just didn’t realize it would be you making it awkward,” Blaine said, rubbing his arm.

Kurt’s brain was still fuzzy and all he knew was the familiar asshole tone of Blaine’s voice and the unfamiliar touch on his arm. He screamed and was out of bed, cowering in the corner, in a matter of seconds.

“Kurt!” Blaine cried, his face shocked and horrified. “Are you alright?”

“Kurt, nobody here is going to hurt you, okay?” Jason said, coming toward him with a hand raised.

Kurt saw Colton’s wide blue eyes over on Jason’s bed, staring at him as if he were an alien. Jason looked like he was approaching a wild animal and Blaine looked like he’d been sucker punched.

“Blaine?” His mind was clearing and his face lit on fire as he realized what he’d done, how far he’d overreacted. “Oh my god, Blaine, I’m so sorry.”

Taking a deep breath, Blaine blinked slowly and a smile appeared on his face. “No harm, no foul, Kurt. As long as you’re okay. You’ve been through enough and I freaked you out.”

Kurt scrambled to his feet and threw himself in Blaine’s arms. “I’m so sorry, Blaine,” he whispered in his ear. “I’m still yours, right?”

“You’re still mine,” Blaine confirmed.

Kurt let the tears that had built up spill over. He was shivering from the aftermath of the nightmare and the  fear that he might have driven Blaine away. It shocked him how quickly Blaine had become an integral part of his life.

“We’re gonna go get some coffee for everyone,” Colton said quietly.

Kurt felt Blaine nod, and the door closed behind them. “Blaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Please forgive me?” Kurt pleaded, not wanting to ruin the beautiful beginning that it seemed they were having.

“Kurt, there is nothing to forgive,” Blaine said gruffly.

“But I screamed and ran from you,” Kurt muttered, embarrassed to even have to repeat what he’d done.

“And there would have been no call for you to do that if I hadn’t bullied you. If this is anyone’s fault, it’s mine, Kurt, okay?” He put a finger and tilted Kurt’s chin up until he was staring into his watery blue eyes. “Okay?”

“Okay,” Kurt said. “Blaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Kiss me?”

“Okay,” Blaine said with a small smile and gently put his lips to Kurt’s. As their lips moved against each other, it seemed to heal something in Kurt. It made the nightmare move back into the recesses of his mind where it might not haunt him as badly as it would have otherwise.

“I liked falling asleep next to you,” Kurt said quietly when their lips parted.

“Me too. You’re soft,” Blaine said, his gold eyes twinkling.

“I am not,” Kurt said defensively. He lifted his arm and showed Blaine a truly impressive bicep that he’d had no idea was hiding in there.

“Okay, I take that back. Your skin is soft. Not like mine,” he said, rubbing his calloused hand over Kurt’s soft forearm.

“Only because you play the guitar and box. Blaine?” Kurt said, his eyes lighting up.

“Yeah?”

“Will you teach me how to box? To fight? Like self defense kind of stuff?” Kurt asked hopefully.

Blaine saw merit in giving Kurt some confidence in himself if he learned how to really fight. And maybe Blaine could teach him a corrupt move here and there in case anyone tried to pull any crap with him. Then the thought of Kurt being topless, working out, lifting weights, made him harden. “Absolutely. I’ll teach you anything you want to know,” he said, swallowing hard. _You pervert, the guy just woke up from a nightmare, for which you are partially responsible and you’re picturing him half naked, sweaty, needing to shower, naked, soap suds…. Jesus, Anderson, get a grip_ , he lectured himself.

Colton and Jason came back in with coffee and the four of them made small talk as they let the caffeine work its magic.

“So, Kurt, there was something we wanted to talk to you about,” Blaine said, after a nod from Jason.

“Okay,” Kurt said curiously.

“My mom knows some people in this area. People to talk to when you’ve been through something hard, like you have been. Only to talk and listen, nothing more,” Blaine said, hoping he got it out right.

Kurt stiffened. “Like a psychiatrist or something?”

“A counselor. Someone trained to listen to whatever you want to talk about. It’s not about deciding sanity or drugs or anything like that. Just someone to talk to,” he tried to reassure Kurt.

“I think it would be good for you, buddy,” Jason said gently and Colton nodded from his side.

Kurt’s eyes watered. “Do you guys think I’m crazy or something?” His voice broke.

“God, no, baby! You’ve been through hell, though, and I think it would help to talk to someone. Someone who doesn’t have pre-formed opinions of you, someone outside your personal life who can be objective and maybe have some words of wisdom for you,” Blaine said, holding his hand, rubbing the soft skin on the back of it.

“Just to talk to?” Kurt affirmed.

“Just talking,” Blaine, Jason, and Colton nodded.

“What if they are mean to me?” Kurt asked, almost as if he were testing them.

“Then you stop going,” Blaine said, not mentioning the fact that they would just find someone else.

“Okay,” Kurt said quietly.

“Okay?” Jason asked?

“Yeah, okay, I’ll go. I’ll give this person a chance. Is it a guy or a girl?” he asked nervously.

Since Blaine’s mom had specified that a female would be more non-threatening to Kurt, that helped them make the decision of who to send Kurt to. Blaine had found the name in his email and was doing some background work on the woman on his phone when Kurt had starting having the nightmare that morning.

“A lady. Her name is Juliet Clark,” Blaine told him.

“Juliet, huh? Well, I hope she doesn’t start whining about her Romeo, cuz this is on my dime,” Kurt said, his nose in the air. Blaine was delighted by the show of attitude. He would also leave out the key fact that he was covering the cost of the counseling, not Kurt. If this was one way he could make up for what he’d done, than he would gladly pay millions.

“Would you feel up to seeing her today? Before Warbler’s?” Blaine asked, hoping it wasn’t pushing him too fast.

“Ugh. I guess so. She better not make me cry, because if I have to sing with a blotchy face, I’m going to _very_ irritated,” Kurt said in his bitch tone. Everyone laughed because they knew he was speaking the truth.

 

. . . . .

 

“Do I have to do this?” Kurt asked nervously, staring at the building in front of them.

“I would like it if you gave it a try,” Blaine said carefully.

“Nice way to hedge, there, Blaine,” he said dryly, causing Blaine to laugh.

“I just really think it could help you is all, Kurt,” Blaine said, smiling gently at him.

“Alright. And you’ll wait for me, right?”

“Right here,” Blaine reassured him.

“Okay. Here I go. Into the lion’s den,” he said morosely, smiling as the sound of Blaine’s laughter followed him out of the car. He twisted his hands together nervously, trying not to think about what this person was going to think of him. Juliet. What kind of name was that anyway? Some teenage girl missing her heartthrob decides to become a counselor? Shit, maybe he should just keep cutting for all the use this would do him. He mentally shook himself. Blaine had asked him to give it a try and he would. For Blaine. Even if it proved completely useless and pointless. Could this lady have him committed? Oh crap, what was he getting himself into? He steeled himself and went through the front door.

 

. . . . .

 

Jason: Is he out yet?

Blaine: Not yet.

Jason: Do you think it went well?

Blaine: How the hell am I supposed to know Jason? I’m not a fucking fly on the fucking wall!

Jason: Nervous?

Blaine: A bit. Yeah. Oh crap, there he is!

Jason: Has he been crying?

Blaine: Looks like he might have a little. But he’s smiling a little too. Text you later.

Jason: Okay.

Blaine dropped his phone and reached over to open the passenger door. Kurt got in and Blaine was blown away by the elegance and grace Kurt always exuded. Even a motion as simple as getting into a car was made beautiful.

“You look more nervous than I did when I went in there,” Kurt said with a grin.

“I am not,” Blaine snapped.

“Uh huh. Okay, well if you’re not nervous, than I really don’t need to tell you what happened, now do I?” Kurt retorted.

“You damn well better tell me,” Blaine said threateningly, before seeing the wicked gleam in Kurt’s eyes.

“Juliet says that people threatening me in my personal life isn’t a good thing, Blaine. Maybe you aren’t good for my recovery,” Kurt deadpanned.

“I’m the best damn thing for your recovery,” Blaine bit out, yanking Kurt to him, kissing him roughly. Kurt’s giggles interrupted the kiss and Blaine sat back in disgust. “Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been out here?”

“I’m sorry,” Kurt chuckled. “It went well. Juliet is really nice and more importantly, she doesn’t think I’m crazy. She just thinks I need someone to talk to. I’m going to see her again in a couple days and she gave me her number in case I need to talk to her in between visits.”

Blaine held back a cheer, settling for a wise looking nod. “Good. I’m glad it went well. Ready to sing?”

“I am,” Kurt said, cheerily.

Blaine thanked everyone and everything he could think of that it had been successful. He only hoped it would continue and maybe even be able to stop someday.

He turned the stereo up and drove back to campus. They rushed into Warbler’s practice only a few minutes late. Blaine waved to Kurt to find a seat and had a quiet word with Mr. Schuester. He nodded and said he understood when Blaine told him Kurt might be late to practice a couple times per week. He then asked another question and Mr. Schue agreed with a smile.

“Looks like Blaine is going to start us off today,” he announced.

Blaine bounded up on the stage, for once looking excited to sing and not just being there out of habit. He went to the microphone and smiled at Kurt.

“This is for you, baby,” he announced. At the hoots and catcalls, he flipped his teammates off, and motioned to the band.

 

_This time, I wonder what it feels like_

_To find the one in this life, the one we all dream of_

_But dreams just aren't enough_

_So I'll be waiting for the real thing, I'll know it by the feeling_

_The moment when we're meeting, will play out like a scene_

_Straight off the silver screen_

_So I'll be holding my breath, right up 'til the end_

_Until that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with_

_Cause nobody wants to be the last one there_

_Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares_

_Someone to love with my life in their hands_

_There's gotta be somebody for me like that_

_Cause nobody wants to do it on their own_

_And everyone wants to know they're not alone_

_There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere_

_There's gotta be somebody for me out there_

Blaine points at Kurt and tries to put all of his rusty emotions to use in his voice. At some cue, Puck, Trent, Colton and Wes jumped on the stage and began singing backup.

_Tonight, out on the street, out in the moonlight_

_And dammit this feels too right, it's just like déja vu_

_Me standing here with you_

_So I'll be holding my breath, could this be the end?_

_Is it that moment when, I find the one that I'll spend forever with_

_You can't give up, (when you're looking for) a diamond in the rough (cause you never know)_

_When it shows up, (make sure you're holding on)_

_Cause it could be the one, the one you're waiting on_

_Cause nobody wants to be the last one there_

_And everyone wants to feel like someone cares_

_Someone to love with my life in their hands_

_There's gotta be somebody for me, oh_

_Nobody wants to go it on their own_

_And everyone wants to know they're not alone_

_There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere_

_There's gotta be somebody for me out there_

_Nobody wants to be the last one there_

_Cause everyone wants to feel like someone cares_

_There's somebody else that feels the same somewhere_

_There's gotta be somebody for me out there_

 

 _I am yours_ , Kurt mouthed to Blaine, blinking through tears. Blaine mouthed back _Mine_ before breaking into a wide grin.

 

. . . . .

 

“Jason?”

“What’s up? Need some more help on your French homework?” Jason offered from his desk, looking over at where Colton was studying on his bed. He tried not to think about how they hadn’t talked about sleeping together last night, but had simply laid down together. It had been the best night of sleep he’d had in ages.

“Jason, sorry, but your French sucks. When I asked you how to say ‘I can’t come to work today’, you told me ‘I have a green rash in my socks’. Now, I don’t know if you have a history with STD’s in your feet, but that’s some pretty crappy French,” Colton said, chuckling.

“Well, then why’d you even bother to ask,” Jason mumbled.

“Because I was trying to flirt with you,” Colton declared shamelessly. “Now, what I really wanted to know is if you wanted to head down for a bite to eat or if we should order in.”

“What is this?” Jason asked, turning fully around and looking Colton in the eye.

“What is what?” he asked.

Jason motioned between them. “This. Us. Studying, putting models together,” he coughed. “Sleeping together.”

Colton was quiet for a moment. “Does it have to _be_ anything?”

Jason sighed. “I guess not. But it feels like _something_.”

“What does it feel like?”

“I don’t know,” the tall man said.

He was usually so expressive and sure of himself; it made Colton curious. He moved to the edge of the bed. “Well, when we spend time together, studying or painting models, how do you feel? Good or bad?”

“Good,” Jason said without hesitation. “I’ve never had a friend interested in models before. It’s been awesome.”

Colton smiled. “Good. Now, how does it feel when we, when we sleep together,” he asked, a bit more hesitant. He didn’t want to force Jason into any sort of life choice he wasn’t willing to make. But he’d be lying if he admitted he wasn’t staking his heart on Jason’s answer to this question.

Jason sighed heavily and ran his long fingers through his hair. Colton had come to know this frustrated movement, just like he knew that he hummed a little in the back of his throat when he was content. He first heard that sound when they’d snuggled together and it had thrilled him to no end.

“Okay. If I think of it as two guys sleeping together, I’m a bit uncomfortable. If I think of it as you, Colton, and me, Jason, enjoying our time together, than I guess I like it,” he said honestly.

Colton closed his eyes for a moment, trying to contain the joy he felt at Jason’s words. “Alright. Now that’s out of the way. If there ever comes a time when one of us doesn’t enjoy… spending time together, then we won’t.”

Jason nodded, looking like he was giving it some serious thought. “Okay. Then I want to order in Chinese. I, uh, want to enjoy spending time together tonight.”

Colton grinned and reached for his phone. He held out hope that someday, maybe ‘spending time’ would mean more than snuggling. But for now, it was more than enough.

. . . . .

“Are you sure Wes will be gone all night?” Kurt asked as Blaine let them in his dorm.

“Yeah, I’m sure. He’s at his girlfriend’s until tomorrow. Jason’s text said he needed some time with Colton, so we aren’t going to disrupt that.”

Kurt colored. “Do you think they’re doing it?”

“Doing it? Really, Kurt? How old are you again? Five?” Blaine teased, then realized his tone might have been a bit sharp. “Maybe they are.”

“Yes, Blaine, doing it. Sheesh. Making love. Having sex. Fucking. It’s all the same thing as doing it. So, shove it up your cute ass,” Kurt bit out.

“I know something you could shove up my cute ass,” Blaine said, wiggling his eyebrows at Kurt, reaching for him and wrapping his arms around him.

“What. Ever,” Kurt said, leaning in to kiss him. “You know what?”

“What?” Blaine asked, nuzzling his neck.

“I asked Juliet about sex.”

Blaine coughed. “You did what?”

“I asked her if she thought it would be bad for me to have sex. You know, bad for recovery and whatnot,” Kurt said.

Blaine tried to not swallow his own tongue waiting for the answer. “And she said?”

“Oh, she said, I can do whatever I feel comfortable with. As long as whomever I’m with knows that I may need to stop at any point,” Kurt said, smiling at him sweetly.

Groaning, Blaine leaned his head against Kurt’s. “And what do you feel comfortable with, Kurt?” he asked, feeling like he might die before the end of this conversation.

“Fucking.”

Blaine actually stumbled back. Kurt laughed loudly at the shocked look on Blaine’s face.

“Well, I could have said I wanted to do it. Or make love. Or have sex. But you seem to like being pretty straight forward about things. So, yes, Blaine. I’d like to fuck if you aren’t too busy,” Kurt said, a haughty look on his face.

Taking a couple of steps, Blaine collapsed on his bed. Kurt giggled again, holding his hand to his mouth when he heard how high pitched he was. He went over to Blaine and crawled on top of him, straddling his hips. “What do you say, Blaine? Busy?”

“Hell yes, I’m busy,” Blaine growled, jerking Kurt off his lap and rolling them until Kurt was underneath him. He slanted his mouth over Kurt’s and immediately began stroking their tongues together. Suddenly, he pulled back. “All you have to do is say no or stop, okay, baby? Or push me or punch me, whatever. I will stop the moment you need me to, okay?”

Seeing the utter determination and sincerity in Blaine’s eyes touched Kurt. He put his hand on Blaine’s cheek and smiled sweetly. “Thank you.”

Blaine leaned down and slowly kissed him, drawing each touch out, every motion deliberate and meant to inflame. Kurt was panting in seconds as Blaine drew his bottom lip into his mouth and sucked on it before letting go. Slipping his tongue in Blaine’s mouth, Kurt was determined to get some sounds out of him. Thrusting his tongue against Blaine’s until he responded, Kurt quickly sucked Blaine’s tongue into his mouth. He moved his head back and forth, fucking against Blaine’s tongue until a hoarse moan broke from his throat. Kurt congratulated himself. He may be a virgin, but he wasn’t incapable.

Within minutes they divested themselves of their clothes and come together again. They both cried out at the heat of their bodies touching. Blaine dragged his tongue up the side of Kurt’s neck, loving the salty sweet taste of him. Plunging his tongue into Kurt’s mouth, he explored every hot recess available to him before leaving his heat. He rose up on his knees and nibbled his way down Kurt’s neck, loving each and every gasp and high pitched moan escaping his man. “Mine,” he muttered, kissing and licking his way to Kurt’s nipples. The man bucked under him as Blaine suckled at his nipple, puckering the skin before paying the same loving attention to his other nipple.

“Blaine,” Kurt whimpered.

“Okay?” Blaine gasped.

“Okayyyyy,” Kurt affirmed, undulating his hips under him.

“Ah fuck,” Blaine muttered at the sensation. Kurt’s hips had always done something to him and were more than doing something to him now. Trying to ignore the desire to plunge into him now, he licked his way down to the small puddle of pre-come resting on Kurt’s abdomen. He lapped it up, a satisfied sound echoing out of his throat. Kurt gasped and rotated his hips again, desperately seeking friction. In one sure stroke, Blaine licked the entire length of Kurt’s cock, loving the shudder it produced.

Kurt couldn’t take anymore. He knew Blaine wanted to take his time, but he needed something and he needed it now. He reached down and forcefully grabbed Blaine’s cock before stroking it. Blaine had to stop what he was doing, the sensations overwhelmed him so much. Kurt pumped him for a moment before bringing his wet fingers to his lips and loudly sucking each one clean. Blaine watched him and groaned, not allowing him to finish before thrusting his tongue between Kurt’s hot lips, tasting himself on the other man’s tongue.  It was a heady taste and it made his cock throb in response.

“More, Blaine. Please more,” Kurt whimpered.

“Yeah, okay,” Blaine agreed, dizzy with desire. He reached over to his side table drawer and pulled out a bottle of lube and a condom. He left the condom on the table within easy reach. Even in his aroused state he didn’t want Kurt feeling pressured.

He expertly lubed up his fingers while kissing Kurt. “You sure, baby?”

“Fingers, now, Blaine,” Kurt grunted against his lips.

“You just say the word…,”

“Blaine,” Kurt growled, his voice a full octave lower than normal.

“Fingers, right,” Blaine muttered, kissing him deeply for a moment. “Try to relax, okay, baby?”

“I’ve fingered myself before, Blaine, don’t worry, I know what to expect,” Kurt gasped out.

Blaine groaned loudly at the pictures that produced. That was fodder for a lifetime of jerking off at least. He lightly touched Kurt with one finger, causing him to buck. At his insistent movements, Blaine pushed his finger in up to the second knuckle. He paused, allowing Kurt’s tight, hot heat a moment to adjust. Kurt uttered that he was ready and Blaine slowly eased a second finger in before pausing again. This time Kurt took control by thrusting himself down onto Blaine’s fingers. They both cried out loudly, before Blaine smashed their mouths together. Kurt kept up his rhythm and the feel of his hips moving under him nearly drove Blaine mad. Kurt whispered for another finger and Blaine slipped a third finger into him and gasped as Kurt immediately plunged himself down fully onto all three fingers. He fucked himself down onto Blaine’s fingers until they were both sweating and crying out against each other.

“Baby,” Blaine moaned against his mouth.

“I’m ready for you, Blaine,” Kurt whispered. He knew Blaine needed to hear the words from him. And he was ready. He wasn’t afraid, wasn’t having any flashbacks or worries. The moment was perfect.

Blaine looked into his eyes and saw such naked desire, he had to swallow. He stared for a moment, looking for any sign of fear or hesitation before he nodded.

He rose up and was surprised when Kurt slid the open condom onto his thick length. Kurt smirked at him before wrapping a lube covered hand around him and stroking several times. Blaine was close to losing it when Kurt finally let go.

Taking a deep breath, he lined himself up against Kurt’s hole. Biting his lip to retain control over himself, he eased into Kurt’s hot, extremely tight depths. His sight actually dimmed for a moment with the pleasure coursing through his body.

Kurt keened loudly at the feeling of being utterly filled. Blaine’s thick length was more than his fingers had ever prepared him for. But other than a slight burn, it didn’t hurt. It just felt incredible; full, hot and incredible.

“Okay?” Blaine breathed in his ear.

Kurt could hear the strain in his voice and thrilled at the thought that he was causing the sensations driving him crazy. “Okay,” he whispered back, before rotating his hips.

Blaine gripped his hip tightly. “Holy crap, I almost just came,” he gasped out. “Let me move. You and these hips will kill me before we can really enjoy this.”

Kurt smiled through his desire. “’kay.” He reached his arms around Blaine and rested his palms on his ass, massaging the round, tight flesh. He’d always been a huge fan of Blaine’s ass and it did not disappoint.

Blaine moaned again and began a gentle rhythm of pushing and releasing. Feeling it from the inside and through Blaine’s ass on the outside was an intense sensation for Kurt. Though Blaine claimed Kurt’s hips would kill him, Blaine’s undulating hips were nothing to miss out on.

“Look at me,” Blaine said.

Blue green eyes met gold ones in the dim light. Their eyes stayed on each other through each plunge of Blaine’s cock into Kurt. Every stroke, every tightening of Kurt’s nails on Blaine’s ass. Through every moment, their eyes stayed on each other. Blaine was about to lose it when Kurt’s eyes widened and he cried out, coming between them. Feeling the pulsating in the tightness surrounding him pushed Blaine clear over the edge and he yelled Kurt’s name as he came with more force than he ever had before. He was sure he’d get complaints from his neighbors, but they could all fuck off. The throbbing went on for several long seconds, milking him dry. The feel of Kurt’s body around him, the way he welcomed Blaine into him brought tears to his eyes, it had been so intense. He came to rest gently against Kurt, who wrapped his arms and legs fully around Blaine. Blaine’s breath shuddered out of him and he kissed Kurt’s damp temple.

“Thank you,” he whispered, leaning up to look into the contented blue eyes below him.

“For what?” Kurt asked with a lazy smile.

“For trusting me,” Blaine said gruffly. “For letting me be your first.”

“I do trust you, Blaine. And thank you for making it the most intense, beautiful experience anyone has ever had,” Kurt responded.

“Kurt, I, I think I love you,” he whispered, fear suddenly churning in his gut. He’d never said those words to anyone before. Even his parents hadn’t heard the words since he was a tiny kid.

“I love you, too, Blaine,” Kurt said, kissing him softly.

Blaine stared at him, blinking rapidly for several moments. Finally back in control of his emotions, he gently eased out of Kurt, who winced at the discomfort.

“Come on baby, let’s get you into the shower,” he said, quickly disposing of the condom and lifting Kurt from the bed.

“Okay,” Kurt whispered happily.

 

**Gotta Be Somebody – Nickelback**


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I offer this very short Jolton interlude. For those of you who don’t like Jolton, don’t worry, you won’t miss any of the main story if you skip this.

Jason stared down at the man lying in his bed. He’d never thought he’d be seeing this sight much less experiencing the feelings coursing through him. This need to not only protect, but to feel romantic toward another man. Something about Colton called to him, brought something out of him that he never knew was there. It wasn’t about being gay, he knew that. He could still look at a woman and the curves of her body and feel attraction. It was Colton himself. That light red hair, those crystal blue eyes, his voice, his mannerisms, his easy going acceptance of the world around him. All of these things plus the fact that they had so much in common made Colton easy to be around all the time. That first time he’d held Colton while he’d been having a nightmare had been a fluke. He’d snuggled his little brothers and sisters plenty of times while they were growing up. It had seemed instinctual to hold the smaller man, to make him feel safe. But it had felt like more after he’d lain down fully. It had felt right. Different, but so very right. And that is how it had felt since then. When they’d sat so closely their legs brushed against each other as they studied. When their hands brushed reaching for different paints and model parts. When Colton tried to steal the last wonton tonight and Jason had swiped it back by sticking Colton’s fingers in his mouth. The feel of his fingers on Jason’s lips had been a turning point. It had made him realize that not only could he care about this man, but he could be physically attracted to him as well.

Watching him now, his small mouth parted slightly as he breathed in his sleep, Jason realized how beautiful he truly thought the other man was. The soft blush of his cheeks, his hands clutching one of Jason’s to his chest. Jason was fascinated by it all. Everything was so different than when he was with a woman and yet, it wasn’t. Easing his hand out of Colton’s, he smiled at the pout that turned his lips down. Making a comforting sound in his ear, he brushed Colton’s hair from his forehead. Colton reacted, turning his face slightly into Jason’s hand. He liked the feel of his hair, his skin. He used moisturizer, he’d told Jason, because it had a built in SPF that he needed for his skin tone. When he’d felt embarrassed about it, Jason had shown him Kurt’s shower caddy that contained nearly a dozen different bottles of products. They’d laughed and Jason had told him that he liked his skin and it was good that he protected it. Colton had blushed and Jason had caught himself thinking how pretty he looked with a rosy hue to his cheeks.

Curiosity continued to build with his thoughts and he leaned down, pressing a light kiss to Colton’s hair. It smelled nice. Much nicer than his own generic shampoo. It didn’t feel bad though, so as Colton would suggest, he wouldn’t freak out and maybe see if something else felt good. He brushed a his lips against the smaller man’s forehead, feeling a tingle in his lips that ran through his entire body. Colton sighed contentedly, seeming to tilt his head closer to Jason, inviting him in for more.

Jason decided now was as good a time as any for some uninterrupted exploring. He laid gentle kisses on Colton’s nose, cheeks, chin, before staring down at his rosebud mouth for long seconds. Biting his lip, he asked himself if he was ready for this. If it went as he thought it might, it would change everything. He knew that if he enjoyed this kiss, he wouldn’t stop. He would let the relationship progress to where it deserved to be. He would claim Colton as his own. He would tell his parents he had a boyfriend, if Colton would have him.

Finally, gathering all of his courage, he leaned down, and pressed his lips to Colton’s. His lips weren’t as soft as a girl’s but they felt nice and warm. Backing away, he gasped lightly at the electric shock that seemed to run through his body at the contact. Had he been rubbing his feet on wool before bed? Had it been their lips or had he indeed been shocked? Only one way to find out, he decided, and leaned down for another kiss, putting a little more pressure into it. It was their lips. Definitely their lips. Colton’s lips. Colton. Jason couldn’t prevent the tiny moan that escaped his mouth as he touched their lips together again. It seemed like Colton’s mouth was shaping itself to his and he leaned back.

“Are you awake?” he breathed, just in case he wasn’t.

“Guilty,” Colton said quietly, smiling with his eyes still closed.

Jason moaned. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

Colton opened his eyes and looked at Jason seriously. “I wanted you to have the chance you needed to find out how you feel. I hope you don’t think that was wrong of me.”

“No, I guess not. I feel kinda creepy like I was preying on the sleeping kid, though,” Jason muttered.

“Hey, if I hadn’t been enjoying it, I would have said something. Despite my being horizontally challenged, I am a man and I know how to say no,” Colton said, giving him a gentle smile.

“Mind if I try something since you’re up?” Jason asked, butterflies erupting in his stomach at the thought of kissing while Colton was awake.

“Of course not,” Colton said, his eyes wide and accepting. He seemed to know this was a pivotal moment for them both.

Jason leaned down hesitantly. Colton simply tilted his chin up, letting Jason take the initiative. Softly, Jason let his lips brush against Colton’s, once, twice, a third time. Colton sighed contentedly in the back of his throat. That tiny sound did something to Jason and he began putting more pressure into the motion of his lips. Soon their lips were moving against one another almost hungrily, but hesitant to make the bold move into passion.

Jason sat back, staring down at Colton, his brown eyes wide with the surprise he felt over his feelings. Colton looked breathless, his lips darker pink from being kissed. It turned Jason on, knowing he’d done that to him.

Moving back in, Jason kissed Colton, slanting his lips just a bit more so he could lightly run his tongue along the seam of Colton’s mouth. Colton couldn’t hold back a gasp of pleasure. Feeling his lips open, Jason let his tongue dip hesitantly into Colton’s mouth. Both of them moaned at the sensation. Jason had had no idea he could feel this way, about anyone, male or female. Their lips moved more confidently together, their tongues exploring hotly, learning one another.

When they finally parted, breathing heavily, Jason smiled down at him. Colton beamed back at him, his cheeks rosy with passion.

“Colton, I, uh, don’t know if this works the same with guys as it does girls…,” Jason hedged.

“What is it?” Colton asked, smiling gently.

“Will you.. uh, will you be my.. uh boyfriend?” Jason stuttered, blushing deeply. He felt like an ass and if Colton laughed at him, he didn’t know if his ego could handle it. He closed his eyes against the giggles he was expecting. Instead a soft hand brushed his cheek. Opening his eyes, he stared down into Colton’s brilliant eyes, shining with emotion.

“I would be honored,” he whispered.

Jason grinned, knowing he probably looked like an idiot, and not giving a damn. “Excellent. Though I do think we need to practice some things in order to make our relationship work.”

“I would agree,” Colton said wisely, a twinkle in his eyes.

Jason cupped his hand against his cheek and lowered his lips to kiss his boyfriend.


	11. Chapter 11

Kurt couldn’t imagine being happier. College had started three weeks ago and though classes were challenging, life just couldn’t get any better. Blaine was a huge part of that happiness. His boyfriend, which he still thrilled at being able to say, had rescued him in a way he’d never thought he needed to be. When he’d been into cutting, he thought it was the only way to get through his life. Now that he had Juliet and Blaine in his life, he had ways of getting his emotions out in a much healthier and productive manner. Juliet and all of her tests and consultations with other doctors had determined that other than Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, he was not suffering from any other underlying issues. He was working with her on the PTSD and he was working with Blaine on how to feel safer and more secure. A few times each week, Blaine had been taking him to work out in the gym, teaching him defensive moves and other boxing basics. He’d been so cute at first, so afraid to spar with Kurt, not wanting to hurt him. Kurt, on the other hand, knew Blaine could take it and had hauled off and punched him in the gut. His boyfriend had been shocked not only at the punch but by Kurt’s strength. He may be lean, but Kurt had always carried strength in his body. Now he was learning how to use it. They had both been surprised at the ease with which he was picking up on boxing. He’d always been limber and quick on his feet; years of running from bullies had made him fast. But now he was quick at dodging jabs and delivering his own before getting out of the way again. It was fun. Blaine didn’t think so when he got punched, but it made Kurt’s day. He always made Blaine feel better. They’d figured out when the gym was unoccupied and had found that being hot and sweaty did things for them both. The shower had been the location of many a tryst, especially because they both had roommates.

Jason was still a wonderful friend who had come to depend on Kurt in a new way since he came out as Colton’s boyfriend. Jason didn’t know if it made him gay, but he wasn’t concerned about a label. He just knew he loved Colton and that’s all that mattered to any of them. But he did have questions and concerns about dating a guy and Kurt was more than willing to help out as much as he could. A lot of the time he simply needed to direct him to ask his boyfriend, even if it embarrassed Jason. Kurt couldn’t be expected to know what might be a turn on to Colton. That was something Jason had to discuss with Colton. But he did help Jason do some shopping. Jason had said that Colton dressed well and he didn’t want to embarrass his boyfriend. He’d been so cute about it all, Kurt had been more than willing to give some advice. Colton had later thanked him profusely, saying he loved his boyfriend, but flannel only did so much for him. They’d both had a good laugh. At least he didn’t have to worry about that with Blaine. Blaine didn’t put up any kind of a fuss when he’d cleansed Blaine’s closet of clothes that didn’t suit him. Especially when he’d stay the night and see that the t-shirts Kurt had said he’d donated had actually been donated to himself. Blaine said it definitely turned him on to see Kurt in his shirts. Kurt was more than happy to oblige him.

Blaine had slept over every night that first week after the party. Kurt had tried to sleep without him one night and had had such bad night terrors that Jason had called Blaine to come over. They didn’t do anything during the night, all Kurt needed was Blaine’s comforting warmth. It eased him immensely. He no longer reacted badly to Blaine’s voice or presence either when he did awaken from a bad dream. His subconscious finally got the point that Blaine was a good guy; that he was there to take care of and protect Kurt.

Kurt could only hope Blaine could protect him now. He fiddled with his sweater again, straightening it against his pants. A warm hand took his hands and held them still.

“You look great, baby. No worries. It’s not you she’ll nitpick about, it’s me,” Blaine said with an encouraging smile.

“She better not,” Kurt said, using his bitch tone. “You are the best thing in my world and if she knows what’s good for her, she’ll be nice.”

Blaine laughed, loving the attitude Kurt had adopted. Many times he felt like he was in recovery like Kurt was. Not for anything serious, though, just some sort of twelve step program for recovering assholes. He still caught himself wanting to call people names, even Kurt, and he’d have to bite his tongue or take a moment to count to ten or even one hundred depending on the person. A few times, he’d failed and had to apologize to people. Kurt was used to it at this point and would just stare at him if he threw out a random insult. Blaine would realize what he had said and apologize. Kurt would kiss him sweetly and forgive him in an instant. He loved that about his boyfriend. Kurt had the most amazing heart, compassionate, gentle, and full of passion. He’d thought Kurt would be hesitant in them having a physical relationship with what he’d been through. Quite the opposite. Kurt was eager to make out in random hallways or sneak off to find somewhere to be together. Blaine had taken to carrying lubes and condom everywhere he went, just in case he got lucky. And with Kurt, luck came around a lot. Now that they worked out together and he was able to see what his boyfriend was physically capable of, they’d taken to trying out different positions. Kurt was beyond flexible and Blaine had a hard time seeing him do the splits when they would stretch and not rush him off to the locker room. Kurt had developed a quick confidence in himself that Blaine fed into. He was a strong, beautiful person and he deserved to know that he was.

“Well, let’s just hope for the best, shall we?” Blaine said. “Here we go,” he said, standing and putting a welcoming smile on his face.

His mother, Elyse Anderson, came through the door of the café. He felt Kurt stand beside him and he reached down to take his hand, squeezing it reassuringly. She made him nervous without trying, he hoped Kurt would handle it better. She had an imposing sense of self, knowing she was better than everyone else, just give her a moment to tell you why. Taller than Blaine, she had the same curly black hair. Her eyes were a dark brown that could bore through you given any moment of weakness.

“Hello, Mother,” Blaine said, leaning over and giving her a brush of lips on her cheek. “This is my boyfriend, Kurt Hummel.”

He was relieved when she turned a sweet smile to Kurt. “It’s lovely to meet you, Mrs. Anderson,” Kurt said politely, but confidently.

“You as well, Kurt. Shall we sit?” She said, staring at the chair in front of her. Blaine took the hint and pulled it out for her.

“What would you like to drink, Mother?” Blaine asked. She wanted black coffee and he gave Kurt a sympathetic glance and went to the counter. He’d prepared his boyfriend to spend a couple of moments alone with her and he’d seemed fine with it.

“How was your trip, Mrs. Anderson?” Kurt asked, folding his hands on the table.

“Elyse, please, dear. It was tedious to be honest. But I’ve never liked traveling. How are you, dear? I know my son thinks I’m the Wicked Witch of the East, but I assure you, I’m not,” she said with just a hint of a smile and a twinkle in her dark eyes.

Kurt returned her smile. “I am great, honestly. I wanted to give my sincere thanks to you for finding Juliet for me. She has been a literal life-saver. Between her and Blaine, I know I’m going to get well and stay well.”

“That is wonderful, Kurt. I know Blaine has a great deal of strength and gifts to share. He’s already shown such a change just since you came into his life. I haven’t heard a foul word leave his lips in weeks,” Elyse said with a gentle smile. “You are quite a good influence on him.”

“Honestly Mrs., um, Elyse, I don’t think it’s me. I just let Blaine be himself. He doesn’t have to have his protective exterior on around me. He is allowed to be who he is, not who he thinks he needs to be when we’re together,” Kurt told her.

Elyse raised an eyebrow at him. “Ever thought of going into the psychiatric profession, Kurt? I know his father and I haven’t been there for him emotionally as much as we should have been. That is our largest downfall as parents.” She smiled at him warmly. “Maybe you will be the glue that binds us all together.”

Kurt was giving her a brilliant smile when Blaine came back with a tray of drinks. “I certainly hope so, Elyse.”

 

. . . . .

“What kind of magic did you work on my mom,” Blaine demanded as they left the café after Elyse had left. “First she lets you address her by her first name which does NOT happen. Then she’s complimenting me on my clothes and my academic accomplishments. That is not the woman I grew up around.”

“Well, we aren’t the only ones who can find a better way of being,” Kurt told him gently. “Give her a chance. I think you might be surprised.”

“If she is going to act decent toward me, I’ll return the favor,” Blaine agreed. “That was probably the most civil conversation I’ve ever had with her. We’re going to have dinner before she leaves for home tomorrow. I know what it was,” Blaine said, stopping them and pulling Kurt in his arms.

“What was it,” Kurt asked, wrapping his arms around Blaine’s neck.

“It was you,” Blaine murmured, leaning into him. “You are magic.” He kissed him lightly, but as they’d both discovered, light kisses never stayed light.

“Get a room!” a voice behind them yelled. Blaine turned to glare before pasting a smile on his face.

“Oh hey, guys,” he said, bummed that they were being interrupted and by people he liked so he couldn’t tell them off.

“Kurt, you really have done wonderful things for this guy. He didn’t call us a single name,” Nick said as he and Jeff caught up to them. They were holding hands, no longer trying to hide their relationship from anyone. Not that anyone had doubted it anyway.

Blaine slid his hand in Kurt’s back pocket as the four started toward Warbler practice. “Shit head. Dumbass. Nimrod. Dweeb extraordinaire.”

Kurt giggled and whacked Blaine on the arm. “Be nice, honey.”

“I do believe he was,” Jeff said, grinning. “You guys ready for your duet?”

Blaine snorted. “Duh. We’re gonna wipe the floor with you guys.”

“Not everything has to be a competition,” Nick said and Kurt nodded.

“Yes it does,” Jeff and Blaine said at the same time.

“I said it first,” Blaine cried.

“No, I did!” Jeff claimed, running toward the shorter man. The two chased each other the rest of the way to the auditorium. Nick and Kurt shook their heads and made amicable conversation about the lunacy of their loved ones as they followed along.

“Hey, before the other two catch up, did you hear about Sebastian?” Jeff asked as he and Blaine caught their breath outside the auditorium.

Blaine’s face darkened perceptibly. “What?”

“Hey, chill out, don’t hit me,” Jeff said, holding his hands up. “It’s no big thing. Somebody saw him behind that club, Screamers, buying what looked like heroin. Judging by his appearance, he’s into it pretty heavy now.”

“Maybe we’ll all get lucky and it’ll kill the bastard,” Blaine muttered. Seeing Kurt approaching, he erased the frown from his face and plastered on a smile. He didn’t have to fake it completely. Seeing Kurt always made him want to smile.

They got settled in to listen to the first few couples sing. Most just sang whatever pop song they could figure out. Only Jeff, Nick, Kurt, and Blaine were able to really get away with singing love songs. Jeff and Nick made everyone sick with their rendition of “Anyone Else But You” from the Juno soundtrack.

“We’ll definitely out-cute them,” Kurt whispered.

“We don’t even have to try, babe. Look at you. You make us win just by being here,” Blaine said, kissing Kurt’s knuckles. Kurt beamed at him. That was Blaine’s goal in life. To see that smile on his face every day for the rest of his existence. It had shocked him, the depth of his emotion for this man. He thought in terms of forever now. Thoughts he’d never even entertained before; marriage, family, settling down. And now he did, almost on a daily basis. Sometimes it scared at him. Then he would see Kurt’s smile or feel his soft touch and would know that nothing would ever make life as perfect as Kurt would.

“Ready?” he asked, standing and offering Kurt a hand when Mr. Schue told them they were up.

“Always,” Kurt grinned.

They took their place on the stage and the music began. Kurt and Blaine turned and sang every word to each other. They never turned to the audience, letting themselves get caught up in the moment, the words, and each other.

 

(Kurt)

_When I see your smile_

_Tears roll down my face I can't replace_

_And now that I'm strong I have figured out_

_How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul_

_And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one_

(Both)

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

(Blaine)

_It's okay. It's okay. It's okay._

_Seasons are changing_

_And waves are crashing_

_And stars are falling all for us_

_Days grow longer and nights grow shorter_

_I can show you I'll be the one_

(Both)

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

As if they’d rehearsed it, they reached out to each other, walking closer until their hands clasped. Never once did their eyes turn away, though both were blinking quickly as tears fell free.

_Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart_

_Please don't throw that away_

(Kurt)

_Cuz I'm here for you_

_Please don't walk away and_

_Please tell me you'll stay whoa, stay whoa_

(Blaine)

_Use me as you will_

_Pull my strings just for a thrill_

_And I know I'll be okay_

_Though my skies are turning gray_

(Both)

_I will never let you fall_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

 

By the time they finished the final chorus, they were standing toe to toe. As the final note faded away, they wrapped their arms around each other, kissing passionately. They never realized the auditorium was filled with the sounds of a standing ovation. They were too lost in each other.

 

. . . . .

 

**“Your Guardian Angel” by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus**


	12. Chapter 12

 “So, it’s supposed to be the party of the year,” Trent said excitedly, his green eyes sparkling.

“Don’t they say that about every party from the Alpha house?” Blaine asked, his arm wrapped tight around Kurt’s waist.

They were hanging out after Warbler practice, everyone discussing the possibilities of the party. It wasn’t Blaine’s first choice, knowing what had happened to Kurt at the last party. But at the same time, he wouldn’t hold him back. He was doing so well in his recovery, Blaine knew he could handle it if he went.

“Well, yeah, but they are all epic parties,” Jeff said and Nick nodded his agreement.

“I don’t know. What do you think, babe?” Blaine gave Kurt a light squeeze.

Kurt looked distracted. “Um, sure, why not. Don’t you have something you have to do tonight, though?”

“I’m having dinner with my mom. I’ll be back in plenty of time to go to the party if you want to go,” Blaine assured him, wondering where Kurt’s mind was at today. All day he’d been kind of off, though he’d gone to all of his classes and his appointment with Juliet. Maybe it was just one of those days. Blaine was familiar with those. Those days where everything just sucked.

“Maybe I can head over with Jason and Colton,” Kurt murmured. “I know they mentioned going.”

“Or you can go with us,” Nick offered, smiling.

“Don’t you want to wait for me?” Blaine asked. He was okay with Kurt going, but he also felt an overwhelming need to be there to protect him.

Kurt finally looked at him straight on. His eyebrow was in the air. “I do, but there is no need to. It would be just as easy to hook up with you at the party.”

Blaine sighed. “I know.”

Softly kissing his jaw, Kurt whispered. “But thank you for worrying.”

“I can’t seem to help it,” Blaine said.

“So what time does this thing start?” Kurt asked Trent.

“Nine tonight. So you’ll go?” he asked.

“Yeah, we’ll go. Hmm, I need to go figure out what I’m going to wear,” Kurt mused. “Wanna go with me, Blaine?”

“Sure. I can hang out until I have to meet my mom,” Blaine said, standing and giving Kurt a hand up.

As they walked back to the dorms, Blaine turned to Kurt. “Are you okay today?”

“Yeah. Just distracted. Weird dreams and all that kind of crap,” Kurt said, waving his hand in the air.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No. I talked with Juliet and that was bad enough. I don’t need any more of that today,” Kurt said, irritated by something.

“I thought you enjoyed talking with Juliet,” Blaine said gently.

“I do. Today was just… I don’t know. I just didn’t want to today. But I did and I don’t want to anymore. Is that okay?” Kurt said, his tone sharp.

“Of course. Sorry,” Blaine squeezed his hand.

Kurt sighed and stopped. “No, I’m sorry. I’m being a bitch today. I’m just having a bad day.” He looked into Blaine’s eyes and cupped his face. “Please forgive me?” At Blaine’s nod, he leaned forward and planted a soft kiss on his lips.

“Everyone has bad days, baby. And you’ve put up with plenty of mine, no worries,” Blaine assured him.

They arrived at Kurt’s room and walked in. Colton jumped off of Jason’s lap and they both turned bright red. Judging by the tents they had in their pants, they hadn’t thought Kurt would be back any time soon.

“We’ll, uh, come back later,” Kurt said, hurrying back out, dragging Blaine by the hand.

“Blaine, how about some coffee?” Kurt said, his own face red.

Laughing, Blaine slung his arm around Kurt’s waist. “Sounds good to me. Not as good as what they’re gonna have, but hey, coffee is always good.”

A half hour after arriving at the café, Kurt got a text from Jason claiming it was safe to return to the room. Blaine walked Kurt halfway back, then had to turn towards the entrance to his dorm to get ready for his dinner date with his mom.

“I have to wear a suit and tie,” Blaine grumbled.

“Send me a picture on your phone. You’re beautiful in formal wear,” Kurt said, grabbing Blaine’s ass in his hands as they snuggled close to kiss.

“Do I have to be clothed in the picture?” Blaine asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Um, if Wes is in the room, then yes. If not, then what you do is your own business. I’ll enjoy the picture either way,” Kurt said with a laugh.

“Okay. Kurt, do me a favor?”

“Of course,” Kurt promised. Blaine rarely asked for anything, he was interested to see what he wanted.

“Stick close to either Jason and Colton or Nick and Jeff until I get there? Just for my frame of mind?”

“Don’t you think I can take care of myself by now? Are you doubting your ninja skills?” Kurt teased.

“Of course not. I know you could kick some major ass. But it doesn’t take away my worry,” Blaine said, looking down, seeming as if he were embarrassed by his admission.

Kurt brought his chin up and kissed him deeply, sweeping his tongue throughout Blaine’s mouth. Pulling back, he smiled. “I will stick with one of the two couples. Anything to ease your mind. Thank you for worrying and caring about me.”

“I love you,” Blaine said, sharing in the smile.

“I love you, too. Have fun with your mom. Tell her I said it was nice meeting her,” Kurt said, hugging Blaine tightly.

Blaine kissed his neck. “I will. We’ll probably be talking about you the whole night anyway. She can’t sing your praises high enough,” he laughed.

“Well, I am wonderful,” Kurt said, his eyebrow up.

“Yes, you are, my love. Be safe and I’ll text you on my way back,” Blaine said.

They split ways and Kurt made his way to the room. He decided he wouldn’t say anything and embarrass his roommate or Colton and hopefully the whole matter could be forgotten. He was more comfortable with those two than Nick and Jeff and hoped they’d be okay with him tagging along until he could meet up with Blaine.

He opened the door and walked in. The three exchanged nervous glances. Finally, Kurt couldn’t hold it in and began laughing. They joined in and before long, Kurt was rolling on his bed, holding his stomach from laughing so hard.

“You should have seen the color of your face,” he gasped, looking at Colton.

“You weren’t much better, Kurt,” Jason told him.

When they settled down, Kurt looked at Jason. “We may need to emulate our neighbors and start a tie on the door or sock or something. Hell, even a sign saying ‘Don’t come in, Sex in progress’ would be less embarrassing than walking in on something.”

Jason nodded. “I agree completely.”

“Are you coming to the Alpha party tonight,” Colton asked, hoping to change the subject. He knew he was still glowing from his time with Jason, but he didn’t care. Jason had taken to gay love like a champ, and Colton was enjoying every minute of it.

“I am. Blaine asked me to hang out with somebody until he can meet me there after dinner with his mom. I was hoping I could hang with you two as long as you aren’t planning on screwing on the dance floor,” Kurt teased.

Jason threw a paint brush at Kurt, who grabbed it and twirled it like a baton. “That’s fine, Diva. I already debauched Colton enough for today, anyway,” he said, giving his boyfriend a wicked grin.

Colton turned red again, but didn’t deny it. “Can I borrow a top, Kurt?”

“Do you even have to ask? Duh! Welcome to the Kurt Hummel mall of fashion,” he said grandly, opening his closet. “Let me pick out some things I think would look amazing on you,” Kurt said eagerly.

Jason grinned at Colton and rolled his eyes. Colton went to sit on Kurt’s bed and caught each piece he threw from the closet. Between the two of them, they picked out a light blue sweater that would bring out the blue in Colton’s eyes. The Alpha’s were known for having black lights at their parties, so the color would glow nicely under the black light.

For himself, Kurt chose a white boat neck long sleeved t-shirt. The boat neck was very wide, showing off his collar bones and even a shoulder if he pulled it off to one side. Blaine loved his collar bones and neck and he knew the top would drive him to distraction. He paired it with black jeans and his dancing boots. Kurt then took a thin white scarf and threaded it loosely through his belt loops, knowing it would stand out in the black light. He had every intention of enticing his boyfriend and he knew between the top and his hips, he would be very successful. Just picturing the naked lust shining out of Blaine’s eyes made him sigh. He hoped Blaine would be there soon, though he didn’t see any conversation with Elyse Anderson being quick. He got an idea and grabbed Colton, handing him his phone. Standing in front of his closet, he slid his shirt to one side, exposing his neck and a shoulder. Giving a come-hither stare to the camera, he let Colton snap a few pictures. Scanning through them, he picked the best one and sent it to Blaine with the message ‘Hurry back soon’.

Blaine: I’m going to cancel with my mom.

Kurt: No, you aren’t. And you’ll drive the speed limit.

Blaine: Fine. Here’s one for you. ;)

Kurt gasped as he opened the picture. Blaine was standing there in jeans that were tugged low on his hips, displaying the gorgeous V of his hips and abs.

Kurt: Holy. Shit. Maybe you should cancel with your mom.

Blaine: Now you agree. Too late. Gotta go. Love you babe.

Kurt: I love you too, tease.

. . . . .

 

Two hours later, Kurt was already tired. He, Colton, and Jason had been dancing the entire time they’d been at the party. The rumors had been true and the black lights had made everything look surreal. Kurt thought he looked amazing under the light and wished Blaine could see him. Blaine had texted a while ago and said their reservations had been pushed back a half hour, so he’d be even later. Kurt wasn’t sure he’d last much longer. He wasn’t drinking and being around all of these drunk people was wearing on his already thin patience. All day he’d felt off, distracted, and just generally irritated in his own skin. Now he knew he was bringing the party down for his friends, and probably would for Blaine too. He saw Jeff and Nick heading for the door and intercepted them. They were on the way back to their dorm room and although Kurt knew he would be interrupting their drive back, he begged a ride from them. They agreed and Kurt rushed back to Jason, telling him he’d be at the dorm room. Jason nodded and told him to feel better. As Kurt watched Jeff and Nick give each other loving glances on the way, he was glad he was going back to his room. He really just didn’t want to be around other people right now. Maybe some time alone would be good. A hot shower and a good book until Blaine got there. Then his boyfriend could screw the funk out of him. He grinned to himself. Sounded like a perfect plan. He texted the change of plans to Blaine, who responded that he expected to be there within an hour. Kurt thought that was perfect. He’d have some time to himself and then some with his lover. At the dorm, he thanked Jeff and Nick and ran up to his room, ready to have quality Kurt time. As he changed into some pajamas, he checked his phone and on a whim brought up the picture of Blaine. Maybe there would be a change in the type of quality Kurt time, he thought with a wicked smile.

 

. . . . .

“Take care of that boyfriend, Blaine. You two seem so good for each other,” Elyse Anderson was saying as she walked to the waiting cab.

“I will, Mom. And I know he’s good for me. I can only hope I bring some good into it for him,” Blaine assured her.

She surprised him by reaching out and hugging him. “You bring him a lot of good, Blaine darling. You are so strong and that is only part of what you offer him. Don’t sell yourself short. I love you, son,” she said quickly before climbing in the car.

“I love you, too, Mom,” Blaine responded, somewhat bemused. He waved as the cab pulled away and walked to his car. His mom had seemed like somebody completely different. She’d listened to him talk not just about Kurt, but about himself. His new classes, his hopes for the future. It was the conversation he’d always dreamed they could have, but never had. As he started the car, he heard his phone beep to alert him to a new text. Almost dropping the phone, he stared in awe at his boyfriend who was completely nude and holding onto his large erection.

Kurt: Hope your coming soon.

Blaine grinned at the bad pun.

Blaine: Yeah, you too, babe. On my way now.

Kurt: lol Good. See you soon. Delete the picture now please.

Blaine: Not on your life.

Kurt: Shit.

Blaine: Maybe after I see the real thing.

Kurt: Okay. Hurry up.

Blaine: I thought you said I had to do the speed limit?

Kurt: I lied. Hurry up.

Blaine: See you very soon.

Kurt: See you.

Blaine laughed and adjusted his pants as he took another look at the picture Kurt had sent. Holy shit his boyfriend was hot. And this new boldness and confidence he was displaying was beautiful to behold. He turned the stereo on and started singing along, thinking about what he and Kurt could do tonight. Maybe he could get Jason to go to Colton’s room tonight since he still had no roommate. They’d done that trade before. He’d text Jason when he got back. A new song came on and he recognized it as “Lullaby” by Nickelback.

 

_Well, I know the feeling_

_Of finding yourself stuck out on the ledge_

_And there ain't no healing_

_From cutting yourself with the jagged edge_

_I'm telling you that, it's never that bad_

_Take it from someone who's been where you're at_

_Laid out on the floor_

_And you're not sure you can take this anymore_

_So just give it one more try to a lullaby_

_And turn this up on the radio_

_If you can hear me now_

_I'm reaching out_

_To let you know that you're not alone_

_And if you can't tell, I'm scared as hell_

_'Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Oh, honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

_Please let me take you_

_Out of the darkness and into the light_

_'Cause I have faith in you_

_That you're gonna make it through another night_

_Stop thinking about the easy way out_

_There's no need to go and blow the candle out_

_Because you're not done_

_You're far too young_

_And the best is yet to come_

_So just give it one more try to a lullaby_

_And turn this up on the radio_

_If you can hear me now_

_I'm reaching out_

_To let you know that you're not alone_

_And if you can't tell, I'm scared as hell_

_'Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Oh, honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

_Well, everybody's hit the bottom_

_Everybody's been forgotten_

_When everybody's tired of being alone_

_Yeah, everybody's been abandoned_

_And left a little empty handed_

_So if you're out there barely hanging on..._

_Just give it one more try to a lullaby_

_And turn this up on the radio_

_If you can hear me now_

_I'm reaching out_

_To let you know that you're not alone_

_And if you can't tell, I'm scared as hell_

_'Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Oh, honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

He sang along with the song, enjoying the sound of their voices. Maybe he’d try his hand at writing a song for Kurt, his very own lullaby. That might be fun. Maybe if it was good enough, they could use it for the Warbler’s. It had happened in the past.

Throwing around ideas for lyrics, he pulled into the parking lot at the dorm hall. The first thing he did was text Jason, asking him if he’d be willing to stay at Colton’s. Jason replied that he’d already been planning on it. Grinning to himself, he ran quickly to his room to change and gather a spare outfit for the morning. He was smiling and whistling quietly as he made his way to Kurt’s dorm hall, when he saw a lone figure wandering toward him. Whoever it was keeping their head down. Blaine kept walking, not really paying attention. As the guy walked past with his head down, Blaine saw the light flash on something red on his face.

“Hey, dude, are you okay?” he asked, turning back toward the guy.

The guy looked up and Blaine gasped. Sebastian stared at him, his eyes dilated and a little crazy looking. He had four deep scratches going down the side of his face and a black eye forming.

“So somebody else had to kick your ass, huh?” Blaine said, smirking. “Who’d you piss off this time?”

“Actually it was your little cockslut,” Sebastian responded with sneer. “He liked it rough, so I made sure he got it rough.”

Blaine stared for a moment in shock. “You son of a bitch!” Blaine screamed and ran at the guy, tackling him to the floor. “Did you touch him? Did you? Answer me, god damn you!”

“He was asking for it. He wanted me,” Sebastian slurred. “He left his mark on me.”

Blaine punched him in the face over and over until blood leaked out of his mouth. “You touched him? You dared touch my man? Do you not remember the last time I kicked your ass?”

“Doesn’t matter. I heard what he did. Playing cookie cutter with himself. Heard he quit cold turkey,” Sebastian said, coughing loudly.

“Bastard! You don’t get to talk about him,” Blaine yelled, running his fists again and again into Sebastian’s body.

The asshole had the audacity to laugh. “I’m pretty sure he’s off the wagon now.”

Blaine felt like he’d been kicked in the gut. “What do you mean?” Sebastian just coughed again and didn’t answer. Blaine shook him hard. “Answer me! What the hell do you mean?”

“I left him a present behind. Just in case he needed it. Shiny and new, still in the package. A five pack, just in case he broke one,” Sebastian giggled maniacally.

“Oh, god no!” Blaine yelled and took off at a dead run. He dialed Kurt’s number and there was no answer. He dialed Jason’s number and yelled at him to get back to the dorm. Jason agreed and hung up.

 

_And if you can't tell, I'm scared as hell_

_'Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Oh, honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

 

The words of the song came back to haunt him. He pushed himself faster, taking stairs two and three at a time.

“Kurt!” he began yelling from a few doors down. “Kurt, open the door!” He got to the door and tried the handle. It was locked. He slammed his fist against the door as hard as he could. “Kurt, open up! Dammit Kurt, open the door!”

Finally, panic overtook him and he slammed his shoulder into the door. It didn’t budge. He called Jason again.

“Jason, dammit, where are you? The door is locked! Fucking Sebastian was here and he said he left razors behind with Kurt. Well, he won’t open the door. I’m fucking freaking out, hurry!” He hung up the phone and started kicking and throwing his shoulder into the door. Putting everything he had into it, he finally heard a promising crack and kept kicking where it had appeared. Finally, the door gave out, flinging open and coming back to hit him as he ran in.

“Kurt! Baby, where are you?” He saw blood on his empty bed and prayed that it was all Sebastian’s. Then he saw a package on the floor. It was the pack of razor’s. His stomach sank as he realized it had been opened.

Dashing to the bathroom, he had to slam his shoulder into the locked door again. This time it opened on the third attempt. He ran in and immediately slipped on his ass. Sitting up, he looked at the red liquid spreading out on the floor that he’d fallen in.

No, no, no, please, no, he thought. He may have yelled it, he didn’t know.

 

_Well, I know the feeling_

_Of finding yourself stuck out on the ledge_

_And there ain't no healing_

_From cutting yourself with the jagged edge_

_I'm telling you that, it's never that bad_

_Take it from someone who's been where you're at_

_Laid out on the floor_

_And you're not sure you can take this anymore_

 

Kurt was laying against the same wall he’d found him on before. He was fully dressed in pajama pants and Blaine’s favorite old Michigan shirt. His skin was so pale it was translucent and blood was slowly leaking from both of his arms.

“Kurt! Baby, no, please,” he cried out. “Help, somebody help me please!”

“Blaine? What is it?” he heard Jason yell from behind him. “Oh shit. Oh dear god, no. Colton, call 911.”

Blaine was scrambling to Kurt’s side, trying not to slide in the blood, so much blood, calling his name desperately. “Please, baby, please, wake up! Jason, get me some towels or something to wrap his wrists in! Kurt, come on, sweetie, wake up,” he cried, tears flowing down his face. He started smacking Kurt’s face, attempting to rouse him, getting smears of blood on his pale cheeks, trying to get some sort of response.

“Blaine, here,” Jason said, handing him two towels. “Colton said an ambulance is on the way.”

Blaine took the towels and tied them as tight as he could around each of Kurt’s wrists. He knew pressure was of the utmost importance. When he’d done as good as he could, he held Kurt’s hands over his head, against the wall, trying to slow down the flow of blood. Using his other hand, he started shaking Kurt’s shoulder again.

Finally, he saw his eyelids flutter, their color almost purple. “Kurt, come on, baby, open your eyes and look at me! There you go, come on, sweetie.” So much red, please baby, please answer me, he thought.

“Blaine,” Kurt whispered hoarsely.

“Yeah, baby, I’m here,” Blaine sobbed, never so grateful to hear that voice in his life.

“So tired, Blaine,” he rasped.

“I know, Kurt. But you gotta hold on for me. The ambulance is on the way,” Blaine told him, trying to keep him centered on his voice.

“No. No ambulance,” Kurt said and tried to struggle against Blaine but he was so weak, it took next to no effort to keep him where he was.

“Kurt, yes, you need help. We need to get your wrists bandaged up,” Blaine said, feeling desperate.

“Too tired, Blaine. Too dirty. No more. I’m, I’m done. So tired,” Kurt muttered, his voice getting quieter.

Blaine closed his eyes against the words. That son of a bitch. What did he do to Kurt? “You’re not dirty, baby. You’re clean now, okay? We’ll get you clean together, okay?” He looked at Kurt who had gone still again. “Kurt? Kurt, come on, you’ve gotta stay with me!” Kurt’s body began slipping lower onto the floor, his clothes getting stained by the blood still pooled around them. His body was slumping unnaturally. Blaine cried out.

“What is it?” Jason asked from the doorway and gasped at the sight of Kurt slipping.

“Kurt, baby, please,” Blaine begged loudly, putting his bloody fingers against Kurt’s neck. No, no, no, please no. He let go of Kurt’s wrists and pushed his ear to Kurt’s chest. He pressed harder, plugging his other ear. Nothing. The heartbeat he’d snuggled into, that he’d used as his own personal lullaby was gone, stopped, taken from him.

“NO! Kurt, please! No, baby, stay with me dammit! Oh god, no! Baby, please don’t leave me! KURT!” He screamed as his heart cracked into a million pieces. He knelt there, sobbing, in a puddle of blood next to the lifeless body of the man he loved.

 

_Please let me take you_

_Out of the darkness and into the light_

_'Cause I have faith in you_

_That you're gonna make it through another night_

_Stop thinking about the easy way out_

_There's no need to go and blow the candle out_

_Because you're not done_

_You're far too young_

_And the best is yet to come_

_So just give it one more try to a lullaby_

_And turn this up on the radio_

_If you can hear me now_

_I'm reaching out_

_To let you know that you're not alone_

_And if you can't tell, I'm scared as hell_

_'Cause I can't get you on the telephone_

_So just close your eyes_

_Oh, honey here comes a lullaby_

_Your very own lullaby_

 

_Well, everybody's hit the bottom_

_Everybody's been forgotten_

_When everybody's tired of being alone_

_Yeah, everybody's been abandoned_

_And left a little empty handed_

_So if you're out there barely hanging on........._

 

**Lullaby – Nickelback**


	13. Chapter 13

“Kurt, god, no!” Blaine screamed. He dragged Kurt’s body down until it was flat against the floor. Swiping his hands over his wet eyes, he quickly ran through the steps of CPR in his head, hoping and praying that he remembered enough.

“Jason, send someone down to wait for the ambulance, so they can get here quicker,” Blaine called out, a sudden calm taking him over. “Colton, come here.”

Colton slid down next to him, his face chalk white.

“Hold his arms above his head. Just like this. We need to make sure he doesn’t lose anymore blood. We need to keep it in his body where it’s needed,” Blaine commanded. Colton did as he asked, holding Kurt’s limp arms in the air.

Blaine put his head over Kurt’s mouth, watching his chest. There was no sound and no movement to indicate breathing. Finding Kurt’s sternum with his fingers, he placed his hands in the right place and began chest compressions. One, one thousand, two, one thousand, three, one thousand; he compressed his chest five times. Tilting Kurt’s head back until his jaw was straight up in the air, he covered his lips with his own while pinching Kurt’s nose. Breathing twice, he watched to make sure Kurt’s chest rose with the breaths. It did and he quickly returned to chest compressions. Come on, baby, he begged. Please don’t leave me. There is no life without you. He did five more compressions and two more breaths. As he breathed into Kurt’s lifeless mouth, he ignored the faint taste of blood and thought of how warm and responsive those lips had been mere hours before. Had that been the last kiss they would ever have? Five more compressions, two more breaths. Check for a heartbeat. Five more compressions, two more breaths. He lost count of how many times he did it. He would not give up. He would never give up.

“The medics are coming,” someone yelled from outside the room.

Blaine was grateful, but he didn’t stop. Five compressions, two breaths.

As people started pushing into the room, he heard a sound sweeter than the voice of God himself. A small gasp of air rushing into Kurt’s lungs. He quickly pressed his head against Kurt’s chest and began sobbing. It sounded very weak, but his heartbeat had returned.

“Keep it up, baby,” he begged through his tears. “Fight for you. Fight for us, baby, please.”

“Son, we need you to move so we can help him,” a medic said from behind him. Colton lowered Kurt’s arms and stood off to the side.

“I, um, did CPR and he just now started breathing,” Blaine reported, scrambling away from Kurt through the blood, though every cell in his body screamed to stay near his love.

“Good job, son,” another medic said, hooking a stethoscope into his ears. “I’ve got a heartbeat. Weak. Breathing is shallow. We need to get this guy out of here now.”

Blaine jumped into action. He ran into the room, seeing a crowd of people. As they saw him, they began crying out and shouting. He didn’t care, he just started yelling for people to clear out, to make way for the medics.

As they loaded Kurt onto the stretcher, he ran back over to the medics. “Can I come, please?”

“One person can come along,” the man said.

“Me,” Blaine said.

“Is there someone I should call, Blaine?” Jason asked, as they walked by.

“I don’t know,” Blaine said, unsure if there was anyone who needed to know. He knew Kurt didn’t have any family except an aunt who had wanted him out of the house as soon as he graduated. “Um, yeah, actually. Find his phone and call Juliet,” he called, seeing Jason nod and begin the search for Kurt’s phone.

“We’ll follow and be there as soon as we can,” Colton said.

Blaine nodded and followed the medics down the hall.

. . . . .

The ride to the hospital was a blur. He knew the medics asked him for the details of what happened and he answered them as best as he could, his eyes never leaving Kurt’s still form. Kurt’s heart kept beating, each beep on the machine a drum keeping Blaine’s own heart going. He heard them on the radio, demanding units of blood to be available for when they got there. The medics told him that keeping Kurt’s arms raised may have saved him. It had allowed enough blood to stay in the circulatory system which was helped his heart to start beating again. Blaine barely heard them, watching Kurt, wishing his eyes would open.

He was pushed off to a receptionist when they got to the hospital, though he tried to stay with Kurt. They needed his personal information and Blaine gave all the information he knew. He didn’t know Kurt’s social security number or blood type or history of illness. He did tell them he was a recovering cutter. The scars would be seen eventually. When they asked for insurance information, Blaine handed them his credit card. The woman looked doubtful, but the glare Blaine gave her motivated into swiping it into her computer.

When all the paperwork was done, he was shown to a small waiting area and given a sheet to sit on since his pants were still covered in Kurt’s blood. He paced, needing to be doing something. Acting out of pure need, he opened his phone and dialed a number. At the sound of the beep, he began crying. “Mom, it’s me. Kurt, um, Kurt tried to kill himself. He was attacked and the guy left blades behind. Oh god, Mom, I don’t want to lose him, I can’t. I love him. I did CPR and his heart is still beating at this point. Please. I don’t know what to ask. I just can’t lose him.”

He hung up the phone and sat heavily, wiping his face and hating the smell of blood, the sight of it on his hands.

“Blaine, thank god, there you are,” Jason said, coming around the corner. He reached the smaller man and reached out, hugging him tight. “How is he?”

Blaine couldn’t have been more grateful for physical contact. He squeezed Jason before stepping back. “His heart is still beating. They are giving him blood and closing up the, uh, wounds. They said he’ll probably be out for a while. His body needs to replenish the blood and revive all the systems that may have started to, uh, shut down,” Blaine said, unbelievably tired.

Colton reached over and gave him a tentative hug before handing him a plastic bag. “We thought you might want to change your clothes,” he said quietly.

Taking the bag gratefully, Blaine pointed toward a nearby restroom. “You guys come get me if you see or hear anything,” he said, almost glaring at them in his intensity.

“Of course,” Jason said, taking Colton’s hand as they sat.

Blaine went to the rest room and looked at himself. He looked like a scene out of a horror movie. Hell, it felt like he was living in a horror movie right now. Easing out of the blood soaked jeans, he shoved them into the biohazard can in the corner. The t-shirt soon joined it and he stood there in his boxer briefs, washing himself quickly in the sink. He had to wash his hands three times before he finally felt like he’d gotten all of the blood off of him. The clothes looked familiar to him and he realized it was the change of clothes he’d brought with him because he’d intended to spend the night with Kurt. He got dressed and wiped his shoes off before slipping them back on. Feeling a bit more human, he rejoined Jason and Colton who said no one had even come into the hallway.

After an interminable wait, a doctor finally came around the corner. All three men jumped up.

“How is he?” Blaine demanded.

“He’s going to be fine,” the doctor said, a small smile on his face.

Blaine felt tears cloud his vision, but bit the inside of his cheek hard to prevent them. He nodded at the doctor to continue.

“He did lose a lot of blood, but we’ve given him an adequate amount to replace it. His body needs to rest for the night and depending on his frame of mind upon awakening, we may need to sedate him. I do want to prepare you, when he does wake up, he will be put on a seventy two hour suicide watch,” the doctor told them.

Blaine nodded. “We contacted his counselor, Juliet Clark,” he said, looking at Jason.

“Yeah, she said she’d be here first thing in the morning,” Jason agreed.

“Excellent. A familiar face will be good for him. You saved his life, young man. You should be proud of yourself,” the doctor said, shaking Blaine’s hand firmly.

“Can I see him please?” Blaine asked, his voice small.

“I’ll send a nurse around in a minute. Only one visitor and only five minutes, okay? The nurse will show you where the long term waiting room is,” the doctor concluded and headed back the way he’d come.

Colton’s whimper was the only sound in the hallway. Blaine turned to see him buried in Jason’s arms, his shoulders shaking with his quiet sobs.

“Mr. Anderson? This way please,” a nurse said, waving him down the hall.

He felt both men’s hands on his shoulder as he passed them. Walking into the room where Kurt was settled, Blaine was shocked to see all the tubes and bags surrounding him. The nurse explained quickly what most of it was; fluids and nutrients that his body needed back. “Five minutes,” she warned him and walked out of the room.

He approached the bed, hesitant, scared suddenly. Kurt looked so tiny, so fragile against the big bed.

“Hey baby,” Blaine said quietly. He couldn’t not talk to him. He had to tell him some things. “Kurt, I love you so much. So much it scares me. But nothing scared me more than watching you die right in front of me. I don’t know what it’s going to take to convince you to live, to stay with me, but I’ll do it all. I’ll do anything you need. I’ll leave,” he promised, his voice breaking. “I’ll leave if that’s what you need me to do. I just want you to live. Please baby, just live for me.” He looked around the room and stepped closer to Kurt. Brushing a light kiss over his forehead and lips, he put his mouth next to Kurt’s ear.

“I don’t know if you can hear me, Kurt, but know that I love you more than anything in this life,” he said, then took one more peek at the door. His voice changed from soft to hard and furious. “Know this, Kurt. Sebastian will pay for taking your life. He’s going to pay for it with his own worthless life.”

He held Kurt’s hand and whispered love words to him for a minute more before the nurse came to escort him out.

Showing him to the waiting room, the nurse wandered off and Blaine joined Colton and Jason who were sitting on a couch. They stood up, but he waved them back down. After talking about Kurt for a moment, they all went silent.

“Um, do you think we should tell the rest of the Warbler’s? With how full that hallway was, I’m sure there are a ton of rumors already. I don’t want any of the guys to worry,” Colton said hesitantly.

“Yeah. Just call Wes and he’ll handle it without causing a stir. Thanks,” Blaine said. He sat there for a while, staring out the window, watching cars drive back and forth in the dark. All of those people were living their lives as normal. Going home, going out, making love, eating, drinking. Their lives weren’t ripped apart, ripped to shreds. All because someone decided they had the ability to ruin someone else’s life. The hatred he felt toward Sebastian knew no bounds. But as much as he wanted, he couldn’t come out and kill him with his bare hands. As satisfying as that would be, it would take him away from Kurt. No, there had to be another way. As he stared at the passing cars, he got an idea and as he thought it through, looking for holes, possible problems, he began to smile.

Colton and Jason sat across from him, watching his eyes go dark, his lids narrow. The smirk on his lips was terrifying.

“I’ll be right back,” Blaine announced, standing.

“Blaine, wait,” Jason said, standing and taking a step toward him. He didn’t know what he would say to the man, but there was a promise of death in those golden eyes.

“Just gotta make a phone call,” Blaine said casually, that smirk lifting his lips again. He walked away, leaving the other two looking at each other in concern. This could not end well.


	14. Chapter 14

Blaine watched as the sun came up and started making its way across the sky. Twelve hours. That’s how long it had been since he’d found Kurt. He hadn’t been able to see him again, though they did say he was awake now. Kurt had asked for no visitors, even Blaine. Blaine had no idea how to feel about that, but whatever it took for Kurt to get better is what he would do. He remembered promising himself that if leaving was what Kurt needed, then he would. But, god, he hoped that wasn’t what was going to happen. Juliet was in with him now. She’d been able to get in based on being his therapist. Blaine didn’t know if she would be able to or willing to share anything with Blaine, but he was hoping for some kind of news.

Jason and Colton had gone back to the dorms. The police had given the okay for the room to be cleaned. The school paid for professionals to go in and Jason and Colton would make sure everything came out okay. He was beyond grateful for their presence. They seemed to know when Blaine needed to talk and when he needed silence, which was more often than not. Wes had stopped by at one point to deliver food to the three of them. He had already talked to the administration and got Kurt and Blaine excused for two full weeks from their classes. Their homework would be delivered by various classmates and they were expected to keep up.

“Blaine?”

He turned and saw Juliet standing there, a compassionate smile on her face. Standing, he motioned to the chair next to him and they sat down.

“How is he?” Blaine asked.

Juliet saw the desperation in the young man’s eyes. He really loved Kurt, the kind of love that could survive something this devastating. “Well, physically, he is going to be fine. His blood levels are all back to where they need to be. They will keep giving him vitamins and nutrients in the IV, but other than that, his wrists will heal just fine.”

Blaine seemed to collapse with relief, slumping into his chair. “Thank god,” he muttered.

“Kurt asked me to talk to you about some things,” Juliet said and saw Blaine sit back up, completely alert, worry in his golden eyes.

“Will he see me?” Blaine needed to know.

“Not yet. He wanted me to talk to you first. What do you know about what happened to him that night?”

Blaine thought for a moment and shrugged. “I ran into Sebastian in the hall and he had blood on his face. He said he’d seen Kurt and roughed him up and that he’d left razors behind in the room. Wait, no, he said Kurt liked it rough… oh sweet Jesus,” he said, his face going pale with shock. “I never even put that together. Did he? Was Kurt?” He couldn’t even say the words. Had his love been violated?

“He wasn’t raped, no. He was sexually violated. The perpetrator was preparing him to be raped, I guess would be the delicate way to put it,” she said, her own cheeks pale. “But Kurt was able to fight him off. I guess he punched him and clawed his way free. The perpetrator called him names and tormented him pretty bad, bringing up the cutting and the feelings behind it. That and the fact that he’d already been having a bad day resulted in Kurt feeling he had no other choice but to take his life. He thought he was too dirty for anyone to care about him anymore.”

“Kurt,” Blaine whispered, tears streaming unashamedly down his face. What his love must have been through. Sebastian’s filthy fingers had touched the body he loved, the body he’d spent hours worshiping and loving and giving pleasure to. His hands tightened into fists, wishing he had Sebastian in front of him so he could kill him. Then he’d revive him only long enough to kill him again.

“He knows it’s not his fault, doesn’t he?” Blaine asked, turning his wet eyes to Juliet.

“I think he does. That’s why he wanted me to talk to you. I think it’s your opinion that matters the most to him right now,” Juliet said gently. “He is afraid you will be ashamed of him or think he was at fault or that he led the perpetrator on. These are all very common thoughts in sexual abuse cases.”

Blaine sobbed into his hands, unable to keep it inside, an anguished moan escaping him. He felt Juliet’s comforting hand on his back. He cried for Kurt, for losing that safety that all people had a right to, the safety of knowing their body is theirs and theirs alone. He cried for Kurt thinking he needed to worry about what Blaine would think. As if he could feel anything except compassion and love for what Kurt had been through.

“Of course I don’t blame him. If anything, I’m at fault for not being there to protect him,” Blaine said brokenly. “I should have left dinner earlier, been there for him. But I wasn’t.” More wracking sobs consumed him. He’d never felt such guilt.

“Blaine, look at me. Come on,” she said, taking his chin. Her brown eyes were warm and sincere. “The only person to blame for any of this is the perpetrator. You couldn’t have predicted this would happen anymore than Kurt could have. Kurt actually says you did save him by teaching him self-defense. He says without that, he wouldn’t have gotten away when he did. You saved his life in two ways, Blaine. Keeping him from getting raped and bringing him back when his heart stopped. You are his hero,” she said, a small smile on her face.

“Could you, could you please tell him, I don’t blame him. I would never, could never, fault him for any of this. I just want to love him, to take care of him and help him be happy again, if that’s possible,” Blaine said, his voice strong and sure.

“Of course it’s possible,” she said, patting him on the knee. “Kurt asked me to be the judge of how I thought you feel towards him. I know now you should be with him. You two can heal each other. I’ll let him know that you can come in, oh!”

Blaine had wrapped his arms around her, muttering ‘thank you’ over and over under his breath. Finally he freed her, his eyes shining with emotion. “Thank you so much, Juliet. Thank you for being there for him.”

“I am so glad I can be. Now, Kurt will be eligible to be checked out on Tuesday, if I give the okay, which I will decide on at the time. I would like him to be checked out under someone’s care. Namely yours, if you are up to it. He shouldn’t be alone for the first few days. The stress and trauma could hit him at any time and he will need someone who cares to be there for him. I also think he would do best in a room that isn’t the one he was attacked in. Do you think you are up to it?”

Blaine was already nodding. “I will do anything and everything I can to help him,” he said, already thinking of ways to make it happen.

“Okay, let me go talk to Kurt and then I’m sure you’ll be able to see him,” she said standing.

He stood and offered his hand, shaking hers gently but firmly. “Thank you so much. I’ll be right here,” he assured her.

“I figured you would be,” she said with a smile.

Blaine was on the phone as soon as she turned away. “Colton, it’s Blaine. Hey, you still have no roommate, right?”

“Yeah, why?” Colton asked.

“Juliet is going to release Kurt to me when he gets out on Tuesday. He shouldn’t have to go back to the room where… everything happened. What do you say to a room swap? You can stay with Jason and Kurt and I can move into your room? Just until…”

“Okay.”

Blaine’s eyebrows raised in surprise. “Okay? Just like that?”

“Of course. Anything I can do to help Kurt. Of course, I’m kind of winning in the bargain too,” Colton said, his voice shy on the phone.

“That’s great. Thank you. Do you think you and Jason would mind moving Kurt’s stuff?”

“Sure. Do you want us to get Wes to help move your stuff, too?” Colton replied.

“Uh, yeah, that would be great. Thank you,” Blaine said, surprised at the offer.

“No problem. We’ll bring you dinner tonight, too, Jason says. So, we’ll see you around six, okay?”

“Yeah, sounds good. Give Jason and Wes my thanks as well,” Blaine said, and they hung up. Blaine hadn’t had many close friends in his life, but he was realizing that he had several now. They didn’t even blink at setting aside their lives to help him and Kurt. Now everything would be perfect. He would be able to keep an eye on Kurt and be right there if he needed anything.

Juliet came around the corner, a smile lighting her features. “Kurt would love to see you now, Blaine.”

Blaine ran up to her and grabbed her in another hug, before they turned back the way she’d come. “Thank you so much. And I already arranged for Kurt and I to have a room of our own. Our friends will have his stuff moved over by the time he’s ready to get checked out.”

“Great! That will do him good,” Juliet said. “Now, he’s still weak and may fall asleep. But he’s okay to have you stay until visiting hours are over, if he is up to it. Just respect his wishes, even if it seems odd. If he wants to be alone, give him that space.”

Blaine nodded along with her. “Of course. Anything he needs.”

“I know you’ll do well together,” Juliet said, and motioned to a room that had a large window.

Blaine knew it was so people could keep an eye on Kurt all the time. He figured it probably drove Kurt nuts, knowing what a private person he usually was.

Not moving forward, he was suddenly filled with fear. What did he say? What if he said the wrong thing?

Juliet nudged him forward. “You’ll do fine. Just love him. Talk to each other, make sure he knows you are in this together.”

Blaine nodded and walked forward to the door. He turned and Juliet waved before walking back down the hall. Opening the door, he fought down the butterflies in his stomach and peeked his head in. Kurt was sitting up, pale and so fragile looking. Blaine smiled, joy at seeing him with his eyes open, filling his heart.

“Hey, baby,” he said softly.

“Hi, Blaine,” Kurt said shyly, playing with the cord attached to his finger to track his pulse.

“Can I come in?” he wanted Kurt to always have the choice to say no.

“I’d like that,” he replied, a small smile on his face.

Blaine walked in and pulled a chair near the bed, but not too close. “I hear you are doing pretty good for the most part,” he said casually.

“I guess so. The doc said I have to keep the bandages on until the stitches come out,” Kurt said, holding his hands up to reveal the bandages that went from around his hands to his elbows.

“We’ll just have to find some extra long gloves for you,” Blaine said with a smile that Kurt returned hesitantly. Even as pale as he was, he was breathtakingly beautiful, his eyes gray-green in the bright light of the room.

“I’m sure I have some somewhere,” Kurt mused. “Blaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Why are you sitting so far away?” Kurt asked, his head down again.

Blaine immediately scooted closer to the bed, holding a hand out to his boyfriend. “I just didn’t want to crowd you. My first impulse is to jump on the bed and cuddle you, but I didn’t want to freak you out,” he said with a grin, hoping Kurt knew he wasn’t staying away for a negative reason.

“I think the nurses might have a problem with that,” he said, a weak laugh escaping him. He hesitantly slid his hand over Blaine’s, sighing as Blaine wrapped their fingers together. “Your hand is really warm. I can’t seem to get warm enough.”

“Do you want me to find you an extra blanket?” Blaine asked, already looking around.

“Would you mind? The nurses have heated blankets,” Kurt said softly.

“Of course, give me a minute,” Blaine said, lightly brushing his lips along Kurt’s hand, seeing the pink blush appear on his face. Lord, he hoped that hadn’t been over the line. Judging by Kurt’s small smile, it was okay.

He hurried into the hall and talked to a nurse. Coming back in the room a moment later, Kurt’s eyes widened. “What did you do, take them all?”

Blaine shrugged. “I can’t help it, she left to go help somebody. All these were just sitting there,” he said, nodding to the tall stack of blankets in his arms. Within minutes, he had Kurt wrapped up like a human burrito, enjoying his sighs of bliss.

“This feels amazing. I feel like I haven’t been warm in a week. Thank you,” Kurt said, closing his eyes.

“Anything I can do, I will,” Blaine said fervently, taking Kurt’s hand under the blanket he’d piled on him.  Kurt looked over to him. “Anything,” Blaine said.

“Thank you,” Kurt murmured. “I guess I have a lot to thank you for.”

“Don’t worry about any of that,” Blaine responded, shaking his head. “I love you and I am here to do anything and be anything for you. I’m not going anywhere.” Then he remembered Juliet saying to let him talk if he wanted. Shit. “But you know, if you want to talk, I’m here to listen as well.”

“Well, I just wanted to thank you for saving my life. I, um, am really glad I’m not,” Kurt’s voice trailed off.

Blaine cleared his throat and gave Kurt’s hand a light squeeze. “Me too, babe. Me too. And you are welcome.”

“I love you, Blaine. I need you to know that when I did want to die, in those horrible minutes, the thing I regretted the most was losing you. Losing out on the chance to love you and be with you,” Kurt said quietly.

Taking a deep breath, Blaine nodded. “I love you, too. And selfishly, I’m glad you are here to let me keep loving you as long as you’ll have me.”

“Even if that’s forever?” Kurt said, a twinkle in his eyes.

“Especially if it’s forever,” Blaine said with a grin that he was glad to see Kurt return.

. . . . .

Blaine said goodnight to Kurt, promising to be back as soon as they’d let him in the door. Kurt had asked for a goodbye kiss and it had been so sweet and soft.  As he walked out the door, Blaine realized he was shaking. The last time he’d touched those lips, he’d been trying to breathe life into them. Now his lips were alive and his forever. He hoped. His phone beeped and he checked the text message.

_The package is ready for delivery._

Blaine left the warm thoughts of Kurt’s lips behind. His face darkened into an expression nobody would have recognized. He quickly texted back, his long stride taking him to the elevator.

_I’m on my way._


	15. Chapter 15

Blaine drove quickly to the agreed meeting place. This had been planned down to the last detail and he would not tolerate any mistakes. Pulling up to the non-descript sedan, he rolled his window down.

“’Sup, boss man,” the tall man said, hidden in the folds of a dark hoodie. “Thought you went straight and narrow?”

“Somebody fucked with the man I love,” Blaine said shortly.

A low whistle came from the hood. “Damn. Wouldn’t want to be that fool. But you’re going about this different than you have before,” he said.

“I’m too close. Can’t risk it. Otherwise,” Blaine shrugged.

“Otherwise, mother fucker would wake up sniffing his own balls, eh?” the man chuckled.

“Something like that,” Blaine said. “Is this shit guaranteed? You know for a fact?”

“It was tested, boss man, and I ain’t saying how it was tested. But I saw the proof. It’s legit,” the man said with a slight shudder.

“Good enough,” Blaine said and tossed an envelope in the sedan. “You’ll get the other half when the deed is done.”

The man nodded. “Like always.”

“Like always,” Blaine agreed and drove off. He parked on the next block, his car pointed toward the back of Screamer’s. It wouldn’t be long now. He saw another hooded man move into position, lighting up a cigarette.

The back door of the club opened and a tall, thin man stumbled out. His man was standing under a street light so Blaine could identify the right person. As the thin man made his way under the light, Blaine’s blood ran cold, recognizing Sebastian. He picked up the small flashlight next to him and clicked it twice in the hooded man’s direction. The man nodded once and made the deal, exchanging hands with Sebastian. The thin man stumbled out of the alley and walked toward his car.

“Time to go home and get wasted,” Blaine muttered, watching him closely.

His hooded friends followed Sebastian with Blaine behind them so he didn’t get any undue attention. Back at Dalton, he parked in his usual spot and waited for the text.

_Home sweet home._

Blaine made his way toward Sebastian’s dorm. He was confident in his guys’ ability to make sure there were no prying eyes around. Seeing the hooded men at various intervals gave him confidence. This was going to go just as planned. Outside Sebastian’s room, three more men waited for him.

“From the smell, it’s already going down,” one said quietly.

“Ready?” another asked.

Blaine nodded. “Nobody but me comes out, got it?” Nodding, the man took a key from his pocket and unlocked Sebastian’s door.

Slipping in and hearing the door shut behind him, he could see Sebastian was huddled on the floor near his bed, the spoon and lighter nearby. He was just taking the needle out of his arm as he saw Blaine. “Hey, buddy, what’s up?” Sebastian smirked.

“Not much. Good shit?” Blaine said, nodding at the paraphernalia on the floor.

Sebastian nodded, his eyes rolling back. “The best. Not as good as Kurt, but damn, good shit.”

Blaine bit his lip hard and sat down on the bed near Sebastian. “Oh, I’d say it’s probably much better than Kurt.”

“Oh yeah? Why’s that? Cuz that boy of yours, damn. His ass is fine. Kicked me in the nuts when I tried to fuck him. Little bitch reached down and tried to twist ‘em off me!” Sebastian said, rubbing at his crotch, his eyes getting heavier.

That’s my boy, Blaine thought proudly. That was a move Blaine had taught him. It only took six point six pounds of pressure to rip a guys nuts off. “How ya feelin’?” he asked, seeing Sebastian pulling his shirt away from his throat.

“It’s kinda hot in here. Can’t seem to get enough air,” Sebastian said, trying to take a deep breath.

“Really? Feels fine in here to me,” Blaine said casually, his eyes glowing with hate.

“Yeah, feels like I can’t breathe. And damn, my head. Something’s wrong, don’t feel right,” Sebastian muttered, trying to pull his shirt off and hold his head at the same time.

“I know what’s wrong,” Blaine offered helpfully.

“What’s wrong with me?” Sebastian asked, looking at him as he pulled at the skin of his throat.

“You’re dying,” Blaine said matter-of-factly. “The heroin you shot up is poisoned.”

Sebastian gasped out a laugh. “Whatever. It’s just getting me high faster.”

“Nope. It’s laced. Right now, the blood supply to your lungs is slowing down making it feel like you can’t breathe. At the same time, blood is rushing to the vessels in your brain, causing the headache. At the same time, your lungs will seize and the veins in your brain will blow, causing a very painful aneurysm. Your dead brain will just lay there, floating in its own blood,” Blaine mused.

Sebastian was starting to panic, but Blaine could tell he was also weakening from lack of oxygen. He clawed at his throat, breaking the skin open.

“Call. Help. Please,” he gasped out, his hands getting covered in blood.

“I don’t seem to be near a phone. So sorry. Wanna know why this is happening?” Blaine asked, watching him with detached interest.

“Why? Help!” The man wheezed.

Blaine stood and knelt over the dying man. He resisted the urge to grab him. Instead he made sure Sebastian’s eyes were on him. “You fucked with the wrong man. You fucked with my man. Now you will die, and I’m going to watch,” Blaine said coldly. He then moved back to the bed and watched as Sebastian started twitching.

“Sorry. Please. Help,” he whined between gasps.

“Yes, you are sorry. The sorriest excuse for a human I’ve ever seen. Lucky for the world, you won’t be around much longer. How’s your head? Probably screaming and pounding by now, huh? Yeah, those vessels are going to give any second,” Blaine nodded knowingly.

Sebastian collapsed all the way on the floor, writhing in agony as his lungs starved for air. Blaine watched, moving a foot casually out of the way when Sebastian reached for it in desperation. Suddenly, Sebastian grabbed his head and went still. A trickle of blood came out of his nose. Blaine slipped a glove out of his pocket and slid it on. Kneeling by Sebastian, he laid his fingers against his throat, then his wrist to confirm. No pulse. Going to the door, he knocked twice, paused then once more. The door opened and he stepped out before pulling the glove off and putting it in his back pocket. The door was closed and locked behind him. Pulling an envelope from his coat pocket, he handed it to one of the hooded men.

“Good work,” he said quietly and walked away.

. . . . .

“Blaine, wake up!” Colton said urgently.

“Huh? What is it?” Blaine asked, sitting up groggily.

“Sebastian is dead,” he said, kneeling in front of Blaine.

“What?” Blaine asked, his voice doubtful.

“Sebastian’s body was found last night. He OD’d on heroin or something. He’s dead,” Colton said, his eyes serious.

“Damn,” Blaine said, shaking his head and sitting up.

“Yeah, I know, right?” Colton said. “Jason’s getting some coffee from the cafeteria. He’ll be here in a minute.”

“That sounds great. These couches leave a lot to be desired for a good night’s sleep,” Blaine said, yawning loudly. “Gonna hit the bathroom. Be right back.”

Blaine made his way to the bathroom and shut the door. He looked at his reflection in the mirror. Slowly he grinned, a dark smile, full of satisfaction. Nobody fucked with his loved ones. Nobody.


	16. Chapter 16

“Kurt looked pretty good, didn’t he?” Colton asked as he and Jason walked into the dorm room. It was their dorm room now. They had made quick work of moving everyone’s belongings, trying to replicate Kurt’s things so it at least resembled what he was used to. The room itself was completely different in color and layout so that would add to the feeling of being somewhere new. Now Colton could unpack the rest of his stuff, making the room his and Jason’s. He had agreed to the room change so quickly that he hadn’t given Jason time to express his opinion on the idea. Luckily, he didn’t have a problem with it. He did show reservations over living together after being together such a short time. But the desire to help Kurt was more important to them both. They’d come to agreements about personal time and space, just to make things easier. Now, he reached for his suitcase and began hanging his clothes in the closet.

“He did. His coloring is a lot better. I guess he gets to go home in the morning, barring any big changes,” Jason commented, watching his boyfriend straightening his clothes. Something about the way he moved made Jason’s insides heat up. Colton was so small compared to him; well, most people were. But Colton was small even for a guy at only five foot six. He loved how he could curl his long body around Colton’s and feel like he could protect him and keep him safe from everything.

“So, uh, was it just me or did Blaine not seem too surprised about Sebastian?” Colton asked hesitantly.

“I’m not sure. He definitely wasn’t upset about it, not that I blame him,” Jason replied. “Why do you ask?”

“I don’t know. He didn’t really make any kind of a deal of it one way or the other. Seemed off, somehow,” Colton continued.

“Well, I guess maybe he’s got more important things on his mind,” Jason said. “Blaine’s a good guy. He’s had his moments, but he seems to be changing for the better over the past weeks.”

“What do you mean he’s had his moments?” Colton asked, moving to the dresser and putting his pants in the drawers.

“There isn’t a lot known about Blaine’s life before Dalton. We know he’s loaded financially and we know that he had a crappy attitude towards anything and everything. But there are stories, assumptions, things like that over dark dealings in his past,” Jason said, smiling at the absurdity of rumors.

“Dark dealings?” Colton asked, looking over his shoulder at Jason.

“Yeah, possible gang or mafia connections, stuff like that. It’s just because he’s rich and he was an asshole. That kind of combination makes for interesting stories,” Jason answered.

“Hmm,” Colton said, shoving his empty suitcase into the closet.

“Enough about him. Come here, you,” Jason said, waving Colton over to where he was sitting at his desk.

Colton grinned and walked over. Jason pulled him down so he was sitting on his lap, his legs on either side of Jason’s.

“This is new and fun,” Colton said quietly, his blue eyes smoldering at Jason.

“Definitely fun,” Jason said, leaning in for a kiss. His lips moved over Colton’s, already familiar with his taste and smell. It was intoxicating, feeling the swirl of Colton’s tongue in his mouth, the heady sensation that he was experiencing something new and exciting. “I want you,” he breathed against Colton’s mouth.

The other man moaned and wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck. “I want you, too, Jason. So much.” He slanted their mouths together, hot tongues and lips moving together, whimpers of desire filling the room. “Anything you want, Jason. Anything you are ready for,” Colton told him. He didn’t know if or when Jason would ever be ready to have sex. But giving him a blowjob sounded like heaven. “I’d love to taste you,” he whispered into Jason’s ear before licking his way around his ear and down his jaw, enjoying the stubble on his cheeks.

Jason groaned at his words. What was he ready for? Hell, what wasn’t he ready for. He felt like he’d been wanting Colton forever and he was finally getting his chance. “Everything,” he said quietly.

Colton leaned back, his blue eyes blown with lust. “Are you sure?”

Jason nodded and blushed. “You’ll, uh, have to talk me through it.”

Colton smiled gently and nipped at Jason’s lip. “I’d love to.” He got off Jason’s lap, took his hand, and guided them to Colton’s bed. “We’ll break my bed in first,” he said with a chuckle.

“Sounds good to me,” Jason breathed. He slipped his shirt and pants off quickly and saw Colton do the same. They both paused when they were standing there in their boxers. They both blushed, but slid their hands into the boxers and pushed them to the floor at the same time. Pausing again, they gazed at each other, both of them aroused and fully erect.

“You’re beautiful,” Jason stuttered. Colton took his breath away.

“You are gorgeous beyond all imagining,” Colton said. He was a little nervous about sex now, seeing Jason nude. The man was huge! At the same time that he was nervous, he was so turned on, he thought he might come just staring at him. “Lay down,” he instructed. “This will be the best position with our height difference.”

Jason laid down and Colton crawled on top of him, like they’d been in the chair. When he moved over Jason’s waist, causing their cocks to brush against each other, they both cried out.

“Holy shit,” Jason said, breathless. “Can I touch you?”

“Of course,” Colton said, settling himself over Jason’s toned body. He put his hands on his thighs and sat there, open and willing for Jason to explore him.

Jason ran his hands up Colton’s thighs, his hands resting there, and up to his chest. It felt so different to be touching him like this, but it felt too good to care. He circled Colton’s pale nipples, smiling when Colton closed his eyes and sighed. He sat up and licked at the small circles until they were both hard and puckered and Colton was whimpering. Satisfied, Jason laid back down and continued exploring. He ran his hand down Colton’s smooth, lean abs before he hesitated. He looked up and Colton just smiled at him, desire evident in every feature. Swallowing, Jason ran his hand down the last couple inches before encircling his fingers around Colton’s hard cock. The smaller man cried out and bucked his hips at the touch. Running his fingers up and over the head, capturing the moisture resting there, he stroked up and down, as he liked to do to himself. Colton began moaning, his hips undulating over Jason’s own cock. He could definitely get used to this. The sight of Colton losing it made him want to scream with desire.

“What do I do?” Jason asked, still stroking him.

“L, l, lube and condoms, top drawer,” Colton stuttered, amazed at the feeling of Jason’s strong fingers wrapped around him. Jason easily found the lube and condoms and put them on the bed next to Colton, continuing his rhythm. “Um, I guess now you get to decide if you want to prep me or have me do it. Either way is fine,” he gasped. “And you’ve got to stop touching me like that or I’ll come all over you.”

“Oh, sorry,” Jason said with a pleased grin. “Prep? What does that entail?”

The guy really was clueless about things. “You put one finger at a time inside me to stretch me out so you’ll fit easily.”

Jason’s eyes went almost black with lust at his words. “Oh yes, I’d love to do that,” he said eagerly.

Colton grinned and opened the lube, pouring some over Jason’s fingers. Jason immediately moved his long arm easily behind Colton and slipped in between his cheeks. “Mm, god, you feel good,” he said, before circling his finger around Colton’s hole.

Gently, he eased his finger inside, not knowing how much pressure or how far to go in. He just moved slowly, hoping he wouldn’t hurt him. “Is this right?”

“Oh dear god, yes. Deeper,” Colton gasped. “Yeah, like that.” He helped Jason by circling his hips, moving against his finger. “Another finger.” Jason carefully inserted another finger and Colton was more than ready for it. He bucked back against those long fingers over and over, moaning loudly.

“You’re so tight,” Jason muttered, his face a picture of strain. “Another?” Colton nodded, a sheen of sweat covering his chest and face. Jason slid his fingers out and pushed three inside him. Colton leaned his head back, moaning Jason’s name, quickly adjusting and fucking back on his fingers.

“Condom,” he breathed.

Jason removed his fingers, hearing Colton gasp at the loss. Quickly he tore open the condom and rolled it down his length, knowing enough to add more lube and stroke it all the way down himself.

He looked up to see Colton watching him hungrily. Colton moved over him and positioned himself over Jason’s cock before lowering himself onto it slowly.

Jason felt his cock push into the tight ring of muscle and cried out at the sensation. Colton was so tight, so hot, he thought he could drown in the feeling.

Still moving slowly, Colton eased down onto Jason, taking gasping breaths at the huge man filling him so completely. Finally Jason was fully buried inside him and he took a deep breath at the intense feeling.

“So tight,” Jason bit out.

“So fucking huge,” Colton said and they smiled at each other.

“Need to move,” Jason begged, desperate for more of the delicious friction.

Colton rose up slowly, loving the sound of Jason whimpering below him. He rewarded him by quickly lowering himself down, swallowing Jason’s cock with his ass.

“Holy shit!” Jason cried out. “More, please.”

With that, Colton began moving quickly, his thighs strong and steady as he rode Jason. He put Jason’s hands on his hips, showing him how he could get involved. Jason began bucking up into Colton and running his hands all over his body. He looked down as Colton’s cock began slapping against his stomach. He took it in his hand, stroking it smoothly and evenly.

“Oh fuck,” Colton moaned. “More!”

Jason began pumping him, twisting his palm over his tip before stroking back down. The smaller man was coming apart above him and it was a beautiful sight.

“I’m gonna come,” Colton warned him, trying to keep the rhythm with his hips.

“Come for me,” Jason said, watching his cock as it tensed in his hand. He stroked firmly and gasped as he watched the come shoot out of him, pumping onto his chest and stomach. “That was amazing,” Jason said, before bucking his hips up. The sight had made his blood boil and he knew he was close. Colton reached behind himself and stroked Jason’s balls which made him seize up, coming deep inside Colton. His ragged cry echoed in the room as the intense feelings overwhelmed him.

Later after they’d cleaned up and were cuddling, Jason smiled down at him. “So how did I do?”

“That was honestly the best sex I’ve ever had. But,” Colton hedged.

“But? What do you mean but? That was freaking amazing sex!” Jason objected.

“I was just going to suggest a bit more practice is all,” Colton said with a wink.

“You shit,” Jason said, smacking him on the ass. “But I agree,” he said, leaning down and locking their lips together.

. . . . .

“So, Juliet says we should talk about what happened to me,” Kurt said quietly, his hand wrapped securely in Blaine’s.

“What do you mean?” Blaine asked, he already knew what had happened.

“I mean before you found me,” Kurt answered.

“Oh. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to,” Blaine assured him. “But I will listen to anything you want to say.”

“I just want to get it all out. It feels like it’s all just sitting in there. If I get it out, then there is nothing left to fester, know what I mean?” Kurt asked.

“I do,” Blaine said.

“Well, you know I sent you those, um, pictures,” Kurt said and Blaine grinned and wiggled his eyebrows.

“Loved those, by the way,” Blaine told him.

“Good. Well, it got me kind of worked up, so I decided to take care of some things before you got there. Well, I’d just finished and there was a knock at the door. I figured it was just you so I slid my pajama pants on and answered the door. It wasn’t you,” Kurt said softly, his eyes closing at the memory. Blaine squeezed his fingers and felt guilt rip at his heart. It should have been him. He should have been there to keep Kurt safe. “He kinda rushed at me to get in the room and slammed the door. He made all sorts of comments about me being half naked and how I must have known it would be him and that I must want him and all this shit. I told him to leave, said I didn’t want him near me. He punched me a few times and shoved me on the bed and we started fighting. He, um, got my, uh, pants down,” Kurt said, his face burning red with shame. Blaine reached up and stroked his cheek lovingly. “I was clawing at his face and punching him as hard as I could, trying to buck him off me. He thought I was coming on to him and, he, um, he shoved two fingers inside me,” Kurt said, silent tears beginning to roll down his face. Blaine got up and sat next to him, taking him in his arms. “It hurt so bad, Blaine,” he cried, his shoulders shaking with his tears.

“I know, baby. I know it must have hurt like a bitch,” Blaine said quietly.

“He uh, stopped to take his clothes off and as soon as his pants were down, I reached out and got his nuts and started twisting, like you told me to,” Kurt said, a grim smile on his face. “He squealed like a pig and jumped up, putting his pants on. I got in another kick at his nuts. I’m sure he was walking funny for a while. Anyway. He hit me again and it made me light headed. That’s when he started talking about the cutting and me being a slut and how you’d never want me now that he’d done stuff to me. I don’t know how he knew what to say, but he kept going on about me being a dirty slut and how I didn’t need to be here anymore,” Kurt said, tears continuing to stream down his face. “He told me the only good thing I could do for you was to leave, to leave the world. I felt so disgusting; used and cheap and I hurt so bad, inside and out. He threw the package of razor blades onto the bed and told me to have a good time. Then he left. I ran over and locked the door. I stood over that package on the bed for the longest time, just staring at it. It hurt when I walked and I remembered how it hurt when he touched me, so I figured maybe a cut or two would make me feel better. But when I sat down in the bathroom, I just kept seeing him and Karofsky and Azimio; all of them laughing and taunting me. I just couldn’t do it anymore. I couldn’t keep feeling dirty and used and less than human. The next thing I knew, I’d cut both of my arms open. I heard you at the door. I heard you banging on the door, trying to get in. I wanted to call out to you or open the door. But the other part of me was so scared of what you’d think. That maybe, like Sebastian said, you’d think I’d asked for it. But I didn’t, Blaine. I promise,” Kurt said on a sob.

“Of course not, baby. I know that,” Blaine said, beginning to rock him as he cried. For the longest time, they stayed like that, Kurt sobbing into his shoulder. Finally his sobs reduced to whimpers, then to quiet. Blaine handed him tissues to blow his nose, which he managed to do quite delicately.

“Look at me,” Blaine said quietly, tilting Kurt’s chin up. His eyes were red ringed but the blue-green color was bright and intense. “You were the victim here. You didn’t invite Sebastian into your room, you didn’t ask him to touch you or hit you or any of that. I love you more than ever and nothing could change that,” Blaine swore to him. “I will always be here for you.”

Kurt leaned into him. “Thank you,” he whispered.

“I love you,” Blaine said.

“I love you, too,” Kurt responded. “Blaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Is it awful if I don’t feel bad that Sebastian died?” Kurt asked, sounding guilty.

“Of course not! Look at what he did to you? Why should you mourn his life when he urged you to take yours?” Blaine bit out.

“Good. Cuz I’m not sad. Not at all,” he said, staring into Blaine’s eyes, trying to communicate something.

“I’m not sad either,” Blaine said, giving him a smile. “I think the world is a safer place without him in it.”

“I agree,” Kurt said.

They sat quietly for a time, just embracing each other, enjoying the comfort of loving arms.

“So. Home tomorrow,” Blaine said. “Excited?”

“Nervous,” Kurt admitted.

“That’s understandable. We’ll be in the new room, though, and we’ll be together,” Blaine assured him.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this? We weren’t exactly at the moving-in stage of our relationship,” Kurt brought up.

“Of course I’m okay with it. I get to see your beautiful face every morning. Besides, you don’t snore. You should hear Wes. Guy can sing, but damn, he sounds like a fog horn when he sleeps,” Blaine said, with a grin. He delighted at the sound of Kurt’s soft giggle. “Are you okay with sharing a room with me?”

Kurt nodded, a smile curving his full lips. “I feel safe with you near me. I mean Jason is great and all, but there is something about you. I feel like I will always be safe when you’re around.”

Blaine’s chest filled with a sense of pride and belonging at his words. “You will always be safe when I’m around,” he swore.

They talked some more about the move and when Kurt might get out.

“By the way, my mom sends her best,” Blaine told him. “I kinda freaked and called her that night.”

“I’m glad you did. I’m sure she was happy that you reached out to her,” Kurt said, squeezing his hand.

“Yeah, I guess. I guess I’m glad too,” Blaine admitted.

. . . . .

The next day after lunch, Juliet signed Kurt’s release paperwork. She had him scheduled for appointments every other day, with phone calls each day. He’d agreed to it all, eager to get out of the hospital gown. Blaine had brought clothes for him which he gratefully slid into after all the paperwork had been signed.

“Oh dear god, I love jeans. I love sweaters and gloves and scarves,” Kurt moaned in delight once he was fully dressed.

“And I love them on you,” Blaine said with a wink. “Ready to go?” he asked, holding his hand out.

Kurt took his hand with a big smile. “Let’s go home.”


	17. Chapter 17

Kurt woke and stretched languidly. He’d been in their new room for two days now and he loved it. He loved the different colors and the extra windows they had. He loved seeing his stuff mixed with Blaine’s on top of the desks and dressers. Before Blaine, he would have thrown a fit to see someone else’s belongings intruding on his space. Not anymore. If anything, seeing Blaine’s coat draped over Kurt’s chair or having to move Blaine’s books to get to his, made him smile like an idiot. He’d been alone for so long, he hadn’t really given much thought to what it would be like to live with someone he loved. It was perfect. Blaine was perfect. The day after he’d gotten home, Blaine had had a queen size bed delivered to their room. He’d assumed Kurt would need time sleeping alone, but it turned out to be the opposite. After sharing the tiny twin size bed, they’d discussed needing more space and after one phone call, the bed appeared. Kurt shook his head at his boyfriend. The things the man could accomplish with a phone and a bit of money. It was crazy. But waking up this morning on the pillow top mattress covered in comforters and pillows was like waking up to heaven. Thanks to the pills the doctors had given him, he’d been sleeping soundly without any nightmares, which made waking up that much better. Now, being able to turn his head and gaze at the curly head snoozing next to him made him happier than he’d ever been. Once again, he gave thanks to whatever or whoever might be listening that he hadn’t died. He’d tried to thank Blaine and though he’d given a gruff ‘you’re welcome’, Kurt was sure that he didn’t realize the depth of Kurt’s gratitude. He had a plan though, he’d been practicing whenever Blaine left the room, which wasn’t often. Reaching over, he ran his fingers through that baby soft curly hair. Blaine hummed in his sleep and moved closer to him. Kurt smiled at his movement. He was so beautiful. And Kurt wanted him so badly, needed to share himself with Blaine. He didn’t think Blaine would go for it because of what he’d been through. But if anything he felt like being together would help get rid of the memories. At least he knew he’d never have to see the scumbag again. It was no surprise that he had OD’d. Junkies always did at some point. Kurt had to admit that if he had died any other way, he would have looked at Blaine questioningly. His boyfriend was fiercely protective, sometimes getting a gleam in his eyes that was frightening. But Sebastian had died a normal death, nothing suspicious about it. And the world was a better place because of it.

Maybe tonight, Kurt thought. Maybe tonight he could seduce his boyfriend. He grinned at the thought. Being this close to Blaine, even with both of them fully clothed in pajamas, just did something to him. Angling himself closer so he could cuddle against Blaine’s side, he breathed his scent in deep. Everything about this man brought him comfort from his protectiveness to his words to his actions to his scent. Kurt had never felt so precious and adored as he did now.

“Baby?” Came Blaine’s sleepy voice.

“It’s okay, Blaine. I was just snuggling,” Kurt said softly, hoping his boyfriend could sleep some more. He spent so much time worrying about Kurt, he wasn’t taking very good care of himself. Though now that Kurt was home, he was at least making sure he ate good.

“Mmm. Snuggling sounds good,” Blaine said, wrapping his arms around Kurt and pulling him closer. Kurt couldn’t resist wrapping a leg over the top of Blaine’s. It pushed his pelvis against Blaine’s hip. He saw his eyes pop open, the golden eyes bright and surprised.

“Sorry,” Kurt mumbled and backed off. He couldn’t help his body’s reaction to Blaine’s nearness. Not to mention it was morning, which made being hard a common occurrence.

Blaine pulled him back. “It just surprised me is all.”

“Okay,” Kurt said happily, snuggling back in, pushing his face against Blaine’s neck and breathing him in. “You smell good.”

“Thanks, baby. You do too,” Blaine hummed and nuzzled Kurt’s head before kissing him on the forehead.

Kurt tilted his chin up for a kiss and Blaine brought their lips together softly. Kurt hummed in the back of his throat and let his lips move against Blaine’s. He was embarrassed when Blaine pulled back, having obviously felt how Kurt’s body was reacting.

“Baby, it’s just too soon,” Blaine said, sounding like he was in pain.

“Isn’t that for me to decide?” Kurt asked quietly.

“Of course, I just don’t want you to feel pressured or like we’re moving too fast,” Blaine said, his eyes filled with worry.

“God, Blaine, I am so sorry. This is so hard on you,” Kurt said, blinking back tears of guilt. “I won’t push you.”

“Kurt, baby, don’t cry,” Blaine said, wiping his tears away. “I want you, I really, really do. I just… after all you’ve been through. I don’t want to do anything that could hurt you.”

“What if we didn’t go all the way, but just eased each other? Like that first time at the party?” Kurt said, moaning internally at the memory of that incredible dance and how it ended against the wall.

Blaine fairly growled at his own recollection. “You are fighting dirty.”

“No, I’m not. I’m horny. I can’t help it. You are irresistible,” he insisted.

“I’m just worried, Kurt. What if you end up having a flashback or something?” Blaine brought up, his eyes almost brown with the force of his worry.

“We’ll go slow. I’ll be on top and if I have to stop, then I can,” Kurt offered. “Please, Blaine?”

Blaine moaned. “You know just how to get your way, don’t you?”

“I’m not trying to influence you, Blaine. I just want you so badly,” Kurt said quietly, looking down in embarrassment.

“Baby, don’t. I was just teasing. I can’t say no to you. It feels like it goes against the laws of nature if I say no. We can do it like you said, but you have to promise you’ll back off if you need to,” Blaine insisted.

Kurt nodded enthusiastically. He crawled on top of Blaine, straddling his body. He laid down and brought their lips together, slanting them so he could push his tongue into Blaine’s hot mouth. They both moaned at the contact. They’d been kissing with mouths closed for so many days, it felt almost new to kiss deeply. For long moments, they relearned each other, the taste, the texture, the feel of each other. Instinctively, Kurt ground his pelvis into Blaine’s, causing them both to pull back and cry out.

“Damn, Kurt,” Blaine muttered, running his hands down to Kurt’s waist.

“This okay?” Kurt breathed, circling his hips gently.

“Oh god, yes,” came the breathy answer.

Kurt closed his eyes and sat up a bit so he could undulate his hips against Blaine, their cocks meeting through the thin fabric of their pajamas.

“Shit,” Blaine bit out. “It’s been so long.”

“I know. Won’t take long,” Kurt gasped.

He continued rotating his hips, up and down, back and forth, round and round. Each motion brought a new and beautiful sound from Blaine’s mouth. Finally he began to just rut against his boyfriend. Their cocks were lined up perfectly and he thrust against him time and again.

“Oh crap, I’m gonna come,” Kurt cried out.

“Me too, baby,” Blaine agreed.

Kurt pushed his hips almost viciously into Blaine’s, crying out as he came, shivers coursing through his body. He felt Blaine push up against him, once, twice, then his own cry was echoing through the room. Kurt collapsed against Blaine’s chest, breathing deeply.

“I love you,” Kurt whispered.

“I love you, too, baby,” Blaine whispered back, kissing his damp forehead.

. . . . .

“Kurt, I think I speak for everyone when I say ‘welcome back’,” Mr. Schue said, clapping. Kurt turned red as the rest of the Warbler’s stood and applauded, meeting his eyes with smiles and shouts of welcome.

“Thank you,” he said quietly.

“Now, Blaine said you two had a number you’d like to do, so the stage is all yours,” he said.

Blaine and Kurt took the stage, sitting on stools, as the music began.

 

(Blaine)

_It's a new day_

_It's a bright day_

_Even when you stand in the dark_

_It's just that_

_You've been broken into fifty pieces_

_Today is gone_

_I'm the only light that you see_

_You need someone_

_I know all you needed was me_

_(Both)_

_Every day we wake if it takes too long_

_Just tell me something new_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

_(Kurt)_

_Another pale moon_

_Shines like high noon_

_Midnight never felt so cold alone_

_It's just that you're uneasy_

_When you need me_

_Today is gone_

_I'm the only light that you see_

_You need someone_

_I know all you needed was me_

_(Both)_

_Every day we wake if it takes too long_

_Just tell me something new_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

_You can say it's right, but it feels so wrong_

_Just show me something true_

_Forget about the sunshine_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

_Today is gone_

_I'm the only light that you see_

_You need someone_

_I know all you needed was me_

_Every day we wake if it takes too long_

_Just tell me something new_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

_You can think it's right, but it feels so wrong_

_Just show me something true_

_Forget about the sunshine_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

_Every day we wake if it takes too long_

_Just tell me something new_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

_You can think it's right, but it feels so wrong_

_Just show me something true_

_Forget about the sunshine_

_Forget about the sunshine when it's gone_

 

The Warbler’s stood and applauded them, cheering them on when they leaned over to share a kiss. Kurt smiled into Blaine’s eyes. ‘I love you’, he mouthed. ‘Love you, too,’ Blaine mouthed back. Blaine put his stool back and headed down the stairs, turning when he realized Kurt wasn’t with him.

Kurt stood and moved his stool back. “I have a song I’d like to sing for you, Blaine,” he began. Blaine quickly sat in the first row, smiling up at him. “You don’t seem to like being thanked. I feel like I can’t quite get across to you how much I owe you. Not that I feel indebted,” he said, holding up a hand when he saw Blaine’s expression. “I am just so grateful for what you’ve done in my life and for my life. I know you don’t like to acknowledge it, but I literally wouldn’t be standing here if it weren’t for you,” Kurt said, his voice cracking. “I, uh, changed the lyrics a bit to suit my needs, so listen, and I hope you enjoy it.”

 

_I want to start by letting you know this_

_Because of you my life has a purpose_

_You helped be who I am today_

_I see myself in every word you say_

_Sometimes it feels like nobody gets me_

_Trapped in a world where everyone hates me_

_There's so much that I'm going through_

_I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you_

_I was broken_

_I was choking_

_I was lost_

_But you saved my life_

_I was bleeding stopped believing_

_Could have died_

_But you saved my life_

_I was down_

_I was drowning_

_But you came home just in time_

_You saved my life_

_Sometimes I feel like you've known me forever_

_You always know how to make me feel better_

_You'll never know what it means to me_

_That I'm not alone_

_That I'll never have to be_

_I was broken_

_I was choking_

_I was lost_

_But you saved my life_

_I was bleeding stopped believing_

_Could have died_

_But you saved my life_

_I was down_

_I was drowning_

_But you came home just in time_

_You saved my life_

 

Kurt held out the last note, tears streaming down his face. “Thank you, Blaine,” he choked out. He saw Blaine leap up on the stage and come toward him. He held out his arms and Kurt rushed into them, overcome with emotion.

“You’re welcome,” Blaine whispered.

Kurt looked at him and saw tears in his eyes. They stood there for a time, before returning to their chairs. Blaine held Kurt’s hand tightly the rest of rehearsal. Every now and then, Kurt saw him swipe at his eyes. Kurt was pleased, hoping Blaine finally heard him, finally realized how much he’d really done. This man beside him had truly saved his life.

. . . . .

“Colton, you need to let it go,” Jason insisted, trying his best to not yell.

“Jason, come on. The evidence is staring you in the freaking face! Two separate people in Sebastian’s hall saw a group of men in black hooded sweatshirts. Near Sebastian’s room, at the time he probably died. If you remember the news a month or so ago, two men were beat up by a group of men in black hoodies. Now, I looked into it and Karofsky and Azimio, the two guys who were maimed, were two of the guys who bullied Kurt so bad in high school. You can’t tell me there isn’t a connection here!  All of the people who were mean to Kurt are suddenly either handicapped or dead?! It couldn’t be Kurt. But you said yourself that Blaine has a rather shadowy background,” Colton pointed out.

“And what are you wanting to do about this, Colton?” Jason bit out. “Do you want to turn Blaine in based on your opinion? Do you have solid proof that Blaine was even near Sebastian’s room? No, you don’t,” he said as Colton looked down, his face red with anger. “And even if you really think Blaine is guilty, what do you think taking him away from Kurt would do to him? Do you want Kurt dead? Because I guarantee you, Kurt is not strong enough right now to handle Blaine getting arrested. And that’s on the assumption that you are even partially right.”

“If I’m right, then Blaine is a killer, Jason. Do you believe Kurt is safe with a killer?” Colton asked.

“First, I don’t think Blaine is a killer. Second, shit, where could Kurt possibly be safer than with the man who would or could do anything to protect him?” Jason pointed out.

“You are choosing to be blind, Jason. You won’t even think about what I’ve told you,” Colton said, grabbing his jacket and heading for the door. Opening it, he turned back to Jason and glared at him. “I will prove Blaine is a killer and then we’ll see how blind you can be.” Colton turned to walk out the door and stepped straight into Blaine.

“You’re going to prove what?” Blaine asked, a grim smile on his face.

 

**“Sunshine” by All American Rejects**

**“This Song Saved My Life” by Simple Plan. (I changed the lyrics, obviously. It suited the story better.)**

 


	18. Chapter 18

 “You’re going to prove what?” Blaine asked, a grim smile on his face.

Colton slowly backed into the room. Jason saw the look on Blaine’s face and moved to stand in front of Colton.

“Now, Blaine, let’s just sit down and talk things through,” Jason said, holding a hand out towards the obviously pissed off man in the doorway.

“Sure. Let’s _chat_ ,” Blaine said and came in, closing the door behind him.

“I can explain,” Colton said, moving out from behind Jason, but staying close by.

“That would be nice. I came to invite you two over for dinner and I hear you saying you’re going to prove I’m a murderer. An explanation would be called for,” Blaine said, sitting in the chair at Jason’s desk.

Jason and Colton sat on his bed, staring at him.

“Okay, I can’t do the explaining,” Blaine said. “I’m the one who is supposed to be found to be a killer.”

“Well, I heard some things and it started to sound slightly suspicious,” Colton muttered, his face bright red.

“And these things you heard were?” he responded, a condescending smile on his face.

Colton quickly went through the same arguments he’d told Jason about, keeping his head down the whole time. He finished and Blaine just stared at him.

Suddenly, Blaine burst out laughing. He laughed so hard his eyes began watering. When he settled down finally, he saw Jason was grinning and Colton looked humiliated.

“Ah, come on, Colton, don’t be a poor sport. I take it as a compliment that you think I could orchestrate something so grandiose. I mean, what would they be called? The Men in Black Hoodies? What an evil gang that would be,” Blaine chuckled.

“Well, it certainly looked suspicious,” Colton said, an uncertain smile on his face.

“I guess you might be able to see it that way. But if I were to do anything evil, it would definitely be in the name of protecting someone I love,” Blaine said. “What would you do to help Jason?”

“Anything,” Colton said immediately.

“Even if it was illegal or immoral? Knowing it would make him safe and happy?” Blaine continued.

“I guess so, yeah,” Colton admitted and took Jason’s hand in his.

“There you go, then. So, do you want to come over for dinner or would you rather continue your sleuthing?” Blaine asked, a genuine smile on his face.

“Dinner sounds great,” Jason said, all the stress gone from his face.

“Blaine, I’m really sorry. I, just, I guess I jumped to conclusions,” Colton said, his face still red.

“No harm, no foul, Colton. Shall we go?” Blaine said, standing.

As the three made their way to Blaine and Kurt’s room, none of them mentioned the fact that Blaine never came right out and said he hadn’t done anything.

. . . . .

The four were eating pizza and watching “Fight Club”, when three cell phones started buzzing.

“What the hell?” Jason said.

Kurt, Blaine, and Colton checked their texts. “Mr. Schue needs to see everyone immediately,” Kurt said. “Why would he do that?” he asked Blaine.

Blaine shrugged. “He must have some sort of big announcement. I don’t think he’s ever sent out a group wide text before.”

“Are we going to go?” Colton asked, looking nervous.

“Well, I am,” Kurt said, wiping his mouth on his napkin and reaching for his boots.

“You don’t want me to go and let you know what it was about?” Blaine offered.

Kurt smiled warmly at him. “No thanks. It could be something exciting and then I would miss it.”

“Makes sense,” Blaine said, rolling his eyes.

“Wanna come, Jason?” Colton asked.

“I’m not a member, Col,” Jason reminded him.

“I know that, dummy. But there’s been significant other’s there before. Right, Blaine?”

Blaine nodded. “Especially if it’s just an announcement, it won’t be a big deal.”

“Okay. Sure, I’ll go. Maybe we can get coffee after,” Jason suggested.

“Oh yeah. Coffee, definitely,” Kurt agreed, grinning.

The four made their way to the auditorium, where the other Warbler’s were already assembling. Some did have their girlfriends with them which made Jason relax more. Colton squeezed his hand and the four took their seats.

“Thank you all for coming. I know it’s late and everyone probably has studying they’d rather be doing,” Mr. Schue began.

“Not!” Someone yelled and the group laughed.

“Be that as it may, I’m only going to keep you for a couple minutes,” Mr. Schue said with a grin. “I just got some great news and I wanted to share it with you. We have been invited to perform at the National Choir Expo in one month, during winter break. And this year the Expo is in, drum roll please,” he continued.

Everyone began stomping their feet, their excitement building.

“Los Angeles, California!”

The entire group leapt to their feet, applauding and shouting in excitement. The Warbler’s had performed in the Expo before, two years prior, but it had been held there in New York, not far from Dalton. Being in L.A. meant they all got to travel.

“Now, we need to do some serious fundraising. This trip is not going to be cheap. We have to think about airfare, food, and lodging. Plus you’ll all need to think about your own spending and fun money,” Mr. Schue said.

“How much are we looking at here?” Wes asked, jotting down notes in a notebook he always seemed to have handy.

“A rough estimate is about $40,000 give or take, for the twenty two of you, myself and three other staff people, plus the band,” Mr. Schue said, his face revealing his worry. There were loud groans around the room.

“We’ll make it work,” David said optimistically.

“Yeah, Mr. S, we’ll sell cupcakes or something,” Puck said, grinning.

“Nobody wants your special cupcakes, Puck,” Blaine said with a snort. Everyone had enjoyed his pot cupcakes in the past before getting caught. Puck had almost been kicked out of Dalton for it.

“Okay, stick your thinking caps on and we’ll brainstorm ideas tomorrow. Also, we’ll be putting together group numbers, duets, small groups, and solos, so come prepared to start sharing ideas!” Mr. Schue said and waved them away.

“Hey, I’ll catch up with you guys at the café,” Blaine said. “I want to run a couple ideas by Mr. Schue before I forget them.”

“Okay,” Kurt said and leaned in to kiss him. “Hurry back to me.”

“Always,” Blaine said, winking at him.

. . . . .

“Was it me or did Colton seem kind of on edge tonight?” Kurt asked as they got into their pajamas. Kurt tried to not stare at Blaine’s naked torso before he slipped into his tank top.

“I didn’t notice anything. I was too busy staring at you,” Blaine said with a smile, climbing into bed.

Kurt grinned and climbed in after him, turning the lamp off.

They snuggled close together, Kurt’s head on Blaine’s chest, arms wrapped around each other.

“Do you want to do a duet for the Expo?” Kurt asked, tracing small designs on Blaine’s stomach through his shirt.

“Of course,” Blaine said, trying to keep his body calm under Kurt’s innocent touch. “Any ideas?”

“I’ve always got ideas,” Kurt said, chuckling. “And there is one I really want to share with you right now.”

“And that is?” Blaine asked, kissing his hair.

Kurt leaned up on his elbow, able to see Blaine in the dim light from the street lamps outside. “I would need your help, your total dedication,” he said seriously.

“Of course, baby, what is it? You know I’ll do anything to help you,” Blaine said, curious.

“I want you to make love to me,” Kurt said quietly. He put his fingers on Blaine’s mouth before he could object. “I know you think it’s too soon. But I want you so bad. I need you. I’m not scared of flashbacks or having you inside me. I think it might help, to be honest. Give me new memories. But that is secondary. Mostly, I really just want to be with you,” Kurt said with a smile, taking his fingers from Blaine’s lips.

Blaine stared at him for a long moment. “And you’ll stop if you need to?”

“Of course,” Kurt said, his eyes lighting with excitement.

“Kurt, I’m scared. I remember when you woke up from a nightmare and you were terrified of me. I don’t think I could handle it if you got freaked out while we were making love,” Blaine said quietly.

“Oh my god, Blaine. Sweetie, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know that still bugged you,” Kurt cried, hugging Blaine to his chest.

“I’m trying to fight it, but I just couldn’t imagine seeing that look on your face again,” he replied, shuddering at the memory.

“We can wait until you feel more comfortable, Blaine. We both have to be okay with this, not just me,” Kurt told him sincerely, looking into his eyes.

“But I want you, too. That’s the thing. I’m scared, but I want you so bad,” Blaine said, frustrated.

“Then we’ll take it slow. For both of us,” Kurt suggested.

“Kiss me,” Blaine whispered.

Kurt smiled sweetly and leaned down, brushing his lips lightly over Blaine’s. He hummed at the sensation, content to just sweep his lips back and forth against Blaine’s for a time. After a while, it started feeling like there was an electric current passing between their lips. Blaine finally groaned and grabbed the back of Kurt’s head, keeping it still and sealing their mouths together. He thrust his tongue into Kurt’s mouth, moaning at the taste of his boyfriend. Kurt responded, massaging their tongues together, unconsciously moving his hips to the rhythm of their mouths.

“Clothes, too many clothes,” Kurt finally gasped.

They broke away long enough to shed their pajamas and boxers. Kurt pulled Blaine on top of him, burying his fingers in his boyfriends curly hair. Their lips smashed together, tongues hot and wet against one another. Kurt caressed down Blaine’s body to his wide shoulders, exploring the thick muscles there before traveling down to his round ass. He couldn’t get enough of Blaine’s ass, he could spend a year exploring, tasting, and touching it and still not be satisfied. Blaine growled softly as Kurt’s hands gripped him firmly, driving his hips into Kurt’s until they were both gasping with passion.

“Lube,” Kurt whispered, his breath hot in Blaine’s ear.

Blaine reached blindly for the small bottle. He sobered up a little as he realized the next step. This was the test. If Kurt was going to get scared, it would be now, when Blaine touched him.

“Kurt?”

“Yeah?” Kurt muttered, rotating his hips against Blaine’s.

“Do you want to top?” Blaine whispered. He didn’t know if he was more afraid of bottoming or touching Kurt. He’d only bottomed once in his life and it hadn’t been a pleasant experience. He enjoyed being fingered, but he never went all the way after that first time.

“Why? Do you want me to?” Kurt asked, stopping his hips and looking at Blaine.

“It’s up to you. I just wanted you to know it’s an option,” Blaine said nervously.

“Thank you, Blaine, that means a lot to me. Maybe next time?” he suggested.

Blaine nodded, feeling slightly relieved. He bent down to kiss Kurt, moving his lips sensually over the other man’s full mouth. He licked along the seam of his lips, even when Kurt opened his mouth, he kept licking, lightly nipping here and there. Kurt whined, trying to catch Blaine’s lips. Blaine smiled and slanted their mouths together, lapping at each other. He traced his hand down Kurt’s body, scratching lightly over his nipples before he moved his mouth to take the place of his fingers. He licked and sucked at his nipples until Kurt was writhing under him. He kissed his way down Kurt’s body, lapping at his belly button, nipping at his hip bones and the lightly defined V that formed under his abs. Reaching his already wet cock, Blaine licked up the liquid on his stomach, feeling Kurt resisting the urge to buck against him. He took Kurt into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and swirling his tongue across the tip.

Kurt didn’t hold back the bucking this time. He cried out and clawed at Blaine’s shoulders. “More, please, Blaine, please!”

Blaine moved back up to Kurt’s mouth, letting him taste himself on Blaine’s tongue. He quickly lubed up his fingers and ran his hand down Kurt’s ass, sliding in and gently circling his hole.

Kurt gave a guttural moan. “Yes, please, yes.”

Blaine gritted his teeth. Gently and so slowly, he slid one finger into Kurt. He kept his eyes on Kurt’s face, ready at any moment to pull away. But Kurt’s face remained calm, but full of passion and need.

Kurt loved the feeling of Blaine being inside him. “Another one, please,” he whispered, tilting his hips up, offering himself to Blaine.

Blaine pulled his finger out before sliding two in, gently moving to stretch Kurt and let him adjust. Crooking his fingers just so, he found the tiny bundle of nerves.

Kurt almost shot off the bed, crying out Blaine’s name as his entire body felt like it were being electrocuted. “Yes, god, yes, more, please, Blaine, more!”

“Baby, you are so fucking beautiful,” Blaine bit out, sliding a third finger in, still massaging his prostate.

Kurt fucked himself down onto Blaine’s fingers, needing more, feeling like he would explode if he didn’t get more, so much more.

“I’m ready, please, I’m ready,” Kurt begged.

Blaine reached for a condom, pulling his fingers out before rolling it down onto himself and covering his straining cock in lube.

“You sure, baby?” Blaine asked, his voice strained.

“Please, Blaine, yes,” Kurt cried, his body shaking in need.

Blaine positioned his head at Kurt’s entrance and pushed in slowly. Kurt suddenly pushed his hips up and forced Blaine all the way in. Blaine gasped at the tightness and heat encompassing him, before moaning at the delicious feeling.

“Oh god yes!” Kurt moaned from between gritted teeth. He wrapped his legs around Blaine’s waist as Blaine began thrusting into him. The rhythm started out slow and easy, but soon became harder and more desperate.

Blaine reached down and grabbed Kurt under his arms, pulling him up until he was sitting across Blaine’s thighs, his legs still around Blaine’s waist. Kurt quickly wrapped his arms around Blaine’s neck as Blaine grabbed Kurt’s ass. They rocked back and forth for a moment, delighting in the new sensations and angles. Kurt was grateful for the friction of Blaine’s abs against his cock and soon began moving quickly against him. Blaine moved Kurt up and down on his cock, moaning at the intense sensation and closeness of their bodies.

“Not gonna last,” Kurt whimpered, the familiar heat coiling in his stomach.

“Me either,” Blaine bit out, thrusting, holding Kurt’s ass closely.

Undulating his hips against Blaine’s, Kurt came, his cock pulsating against Blaine’s stomach. Blaine felt it and cried out, the erotic sensation pushing him over the edge, crying Kurt’s name as he came. They stayed wrapped around each other for several minutes, relearning how to breathe.

“You are so amazing, Blaine,” Kurt whispered. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, baby,” Blaine replied between breaths. He lowered Kurt to the bed and pulled out slowly, both of them gasping. He disposed of the condom and cleaned them both up before cuddling close again.

“Sleep sweet, Blaine,” Kurt said, sighing contently against Blaine’s chest.

“Sleep sweet, Kurt,” he said, kissing his forehead.

. . . . .

“Well, I have good news and I have bad news,” Mr. Schue said the next day.

There were grumbles throughout the group over the thought of bad news. Someone yelled out ‘bad news first’ and then yelped as someone close by smacked him on the back of his head.

“Okay, bad news first. There will be no need for Puckerman’s fun little cupcakes. The good news is that an anonymous donor donated enough money to pay for first class tickets and individual rooms in the hotel, plus enough for food! Let’s give a round of applause to our donor!”

The room was filled with guys jumping up and down, clapping, high-fiving, and shouting excitedly. Their excitement was as much for the first class tickets as it was for not having to fund raise.

Kurt was clapping, grinning widely. He leaned over to Blaine and whispered in his ear. “That was so generous of you, sweetie. I’m proud of you.”

Blaine looked at him sideways. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Kurt just smiled serenely. “Uh huh.”


	19. Chapter 19

With just days to go before they left for L.A., the Warblers were in a mad rush to finalize preparations for their performances. The excitement of going to the west coast for the first time – for most of them – caused them to be more scattered in rehearsals, with Mr. Schue constantly having to call people to attention. They had their major performances ready to go and today was the final day for them to have their solos approved. Kurt and Blaine had their duet down pat and Blaine had performed a solo the day before, so he was content to sit around and watch everyone freak out. Except Kurt. He could tell Kurt’s nerves were getting the better of him. He knew Kurt had wanted to keep the song choice a secret, but Blaine knew anything he sang would sing like angels from heaven.

Kurt had returned to classes after the week he’d taken off, caught up on all of his work and more than ready to get back into the swing of things. He had some residual nervousness when he was alone, but for the most part, he felt fine. Juliet had cut their visits back to twice weekly unless he felt the need to talk more. His arms were healed and he was liberally applying creams to the scars to get them to lighten. Luckily, it was winter and long sleeves were a constant part of his wardrobe at this point.

Colton finished his solo and walked off the stage, giving Kurt a high five as he walked by. Kurt smiled timidly and took the stage. He’d been working on this number during every spare minute he could find. It had to be perfect for Blaine. Not that Blaine was a harsh judge, but he was singing from his heart and he wanted Blaine to feel it.

Kurt nodded at the overworked band and took the microphone.

 

_Share my life, take me for what I am_

_Cause I'll never change all my colors for you_

_Take my love, I'll never ask for too much_

_Just all that you are and everything that you do_

_I don't really need to look very much further_

_I don't want to have to go where you don't follow_

_I won't hold it back again, this passion inside_

_Can't run from myself_

_There's nowhere to hide_

_Don't make me close one more door_

_I don't wanna hurt anymore_

_Stay in my arms if you dare_

_Or must I imagine you there_

_Don't walk away from me..._

_I have nothing, nothing, nothing_

_If I don't have you, you, you, you._

Kurt’s eyes never left Blaine’s as he sang. He never noticed that the bustling room had gone quiet and that every set of eyes and ears were on him. Blaine was leaning forward in his chair, smiling warmly.

_You see through, right to the heart of me_

_You break down my walls with the strength of your love_

_I never knew love like I've known it with you_

_Will a memory survive, oh, one I can hold on to_

_I don't really need to look very much further_

_I don't want to have to go where you don't follow_

_I won't hold it back again, this passion inside_

_I can't run from myself_

_There's nowhere to hide_

_Your love I'll remember forever_

_Don't make me close one more door_

_I don't wanna hurt anymore_

_Stay in my arms if you dare_

_Or must I imagine you there_

_Don't walk away from me_

_I have nothing, nothing, nothing…_

_Don't make me close one more door_

_I don't wanna hurt anymore_

_Stay in my arms if you dare_

_Or must I imagine you there_

_Don't walk away from me_

_Don't walk away from me_

_Don't you dare walk away from me_

_I have nothing, nothing, nothing_

_If I don't have you, you, you, you_

_If I don’t have you, oh…._

 

The room filled with applause, so loud, it startled Kurt as he looked around for the first time. The entire team were applauding him, something that hadn’t happened during any of the other solos. He smiled shyly and walked off the stage, quickly going to Blaine.

Blaine stood and took him in his arms. “That was beautiful, baby. You gave me chills. I am so proud of you and your talent,” he said in Kurt’s ear. “And I will never walk away from you.”

Kurt shuddered as he sighed and relaxed in Blaine’s arms. The song was about so many things. His insecurity, his love for Blaine, his knowledge that without Blaine in his life, it wouldn’t be like a life at all. It would be existing and after doing that for so many years, he wasn’t going to let go of the person responsible for changing all of that. “I love you, Blaine.”

“I love you, too, babe.”

. . . . .

“Kurt, are you sure you need all of that?” Blaine asked, looking doubtfully at the piles of luggage spread around their room. His own small suitcase was already packed and ready to go.

“Blaine, we have no idea what opportunities we might have while we’re there! Not to mention the opportunities to astound important people with fashion. There is no way to know if we’ll need a suit or a specific pair of boots,” Kurt insisted, looking slightly frazzled.

“We’re only going to be there for a week,” Blaine insisted.

Kurt froze and turned to Blaine with a horrified look on his face. “Blaine Everett Anderson, are you insinuating I should wear the same outfits more than once? In Los freaking Angeles?”

Blaine swallowed. “Um, no. I was just thinking of packing and unpacking time, but, uh, never mind. Oh, I hear my phone, I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Blaine hurried out the door, grateful for the phone call. He considered himself pretty badass, but Kurt in a snit was nothing to kid about.

“Hello?”

“Boss man,” a deep voice said.

“Hold on,” Blaine said and made his way down the stairs to an unused part of the building. “Why are you calling me at this number?”

“I know the rules, but we have trouble,” the man said.

“What do you mean?” Blaine asked, keeping an eye and ear out for any passersby.

 “We suspect that there’s a mole in the operation. Usually wouldn’t be a big deal, but it appears that the bean town boys info was leaked to an outside source,” he continued.

Blaine knew the ‘bean town boys’ referred to the attacks on Azimio and Karofsky in Lima. “Alright, but there are never any tracks left behind, what’s the big deal?”

“The outside source happens to be the father of the smoker, an unknown, but apparently big player in the field,” the man explained.

Shit. Sebastian Smythe’s father traveled in the same dark circles that Blaine used? Not good. Especially if the supposed mole dug deep enough. “What do you suggest?” Blaine knew it was his job to know the best way to handle things like this. Blaine was just the backer.

“I suggest you get the hell out of dodge for a time,” the man advised. “Someone is planning a field trip there in a few days.”

“Not a problem, I’m going out of town in the morning for a week,” Blaine said. “Can you provide some unobtrusive guys to wander the campus and keep an eye out?”

“Already planning on it, boss man,” he said.

“I’ll have a check mailed to the usual spot,” Blaine said.

“Good deal. Be careful out there, man,” he said and they hung up.

Blaine stood there, taking in the information he’d learned. Was his protection of Kurt only going to bring more danger? He had to figure out how to deal with the problem, permanently. He just hoped it could be dealt with quickly and quietly. After the conversation he’d just had, returning to Kurt’s irritation was like a walk in the park.

Stepping into his room, seeing Kurt’s hair messed up and his eyes crazed, he thought he might be wrong.

. . . . . 

“Blaine?”

“Mm?”

“Are you awake?”

“Mm.”

“Are you excited for tomorrow?”

“Mmhmm.”

“I’m kinda scared.”

Blaine cracked an eyelid and looked at Kurt whose eyes were wide open and staring at the ceiling. He was clutching the comforter around him like a life preserver. “Why are you scared, baby?”

“I’ve never been on a plane,” Kurt admitted quietly.

“Never?” Blaine asked, surprised.

“Never. I couldn’t afford the airfare when I came out here, so I rode the bus,” he told him.

Blaine tugged him closer until they were snuggled together. “It’s nothing to be scared of. It’s like being on a roller coaster when you take off. Have you ever been on a roller coaster?”

“No,” Kurt mumbled against Blaine’s chest.

Where the hell had he grown up? No planes and no roller coasters? Well, it at least gave him an idea of where he could take Kurt while they were in California. “It’s no big deal, babe. I’ll be right there with you the whole time, holding your hand.”

“Okay.”

Blaine kissed Kurt softly. “Try to sleep okay? We’ve got a busy day tomorrow.”

“Love you, Blaine.”

“Love you, babe.”

. . . . .

Hectic was a nice way to describe the next morning. Between last minute problems and trying to make sure everyone was accounted for and completely ready to go, they almost didn’t make their flight. Kurt was grateful because it kept him from being nervous until they were strapped into the first class seats. Blaine got a blanket from the flight attendant and wrapped him up in it like a cocoon. While he wasn’t that cold, Kurt was grateful for the sense of security it gave him. Under the blanket, Blaine’s hand took his and squeezed gently as the plane began to taxi down the runway. Kurt’s breathing sped up as the plane did, wondering how something so huge could get in the air and stay there.

Blaine’s hand crept further under the blanket and Kurt gasped when it settled over the zipper of his pants. His eyes shot to Blaine’s and he saw a wicked grin on his boyfriend’s face.

“Let me take your mind off things,” Blaine whispered hotly against his ear, licking quickly at his earlobe. Without waiting, he slid Kurt’s zipper down with one hand and very deftly pulled Kurt’s cock out of his pants. Blaine had tucked the blanket up under Kurt’s chin so it was nicely tented and nobody could tell what was going on as Blaine began stroking him. Kurt’s head fell back against the seat as the plane began to take off. The scream of the engines drowned out the faint whimper that escaped him as Blaine’s hand continued to work him into hardness. Looking out the window as the wheels left the ground, Kurt’s mind was lost in a tailspin of overwhelming sensations. The plane’s force pushing him against his seat, the pure lust that Blaine was invoking, all of it made him feel like he was in a surreal moment. Blaine began circling his hand around Kurt, stroking up and over the tip, spreading the moisture around until he began a slick tempo, knowing just how Kurt loved to be touched. Kurt kept his eyes on the window, loving the feeling of going up in the air and being given a hand job at the same time. His breathing increased, tiny whimpers breaking out of his clenched teeth.

“Let go, baby. I’ve got you,” Blaine whispered. He was doing the most wonderful things with his fingers, up and over and splitting his fingers to slide them down Kurt’s hard cock, only to grip it more tightly.

“Blaine, I’m gonna,” Kurt warned with a quiet moan.

“Good, I want to feel you come all over my hand,” Blaine encouraged, lightly nipping on Kurt’s ear and under his jaw.

Those gentle nips were enough to push Kurt over the edge and he threw his hand over his mouth as he came hard, filling Blaine’s hand. Blaine hummed happily in his ear, pleased at his response.

Somehow, Blaine managed to slide all the mess onto his own hand and discreetly clean it off on a napkin. Kurt fixed his pants and looked around. Nobody was any the wiser about what they’d done.

“We’re not tilted up anymore,” Kurt said, surprised.

“Nope, we’re probably near cruising altitude now. You were pretty distracted through the whole takeoff. Are you still scared?” Blaine asked with a satisfied grin.

“Nope. I do have one question though?” Kurt said, a twinkle in his eyes.

“What’s that?” Blaine replied, kissing him softly.

“How do you plan to distract me during the landing?”

Blaine leaned his head back and laughed. “Well, maybe we can find a way to distract each other,” he answered.

“Mm, sounds good to me,” Kurt said, feeling a bit sleepy after his orgasm.

“Finger licking good,” Blaine breathed in his ear.

Kurt grinned and slowly nodded off. Blaine brought his head down to rest against his shoulder, loving the scent and feel of having his boyfriend near. He’d talked with his connection again and there were ten paid men scouting the halls of Dalton, keeping a general eye on things and watching out for anyone suspicious. They were all told to dress down, as college students, so they had a better chance of catching the mole, if he dared show up. Blaine was satisfied with how things were and knew the guys could handle anything that happened while they were gone.

. . . . .

Kurt tucked the blanket closer to Blaine and himself. Blaine had fallen asleep before Kurt had woken up and he’d had plenty of time to admire and stare at the incredible man next to him. He loved how his upper lip pouted out just the tiniest bit as he slept. He had licked and sucked on that adorable lip many times. Blaine’s golden eyes always turned almost green when Kurt discovered his erogenous zones. Now, as the flight attendants began the rounds of making sure people were getting ready for the landing, Kurt had his own plan for distraction.

Blaine woke with a gasp, as Kurt stroked him to life.

“Welcome to California,” Kurt whispered.

Blaine grinned sleepily and reached over into Kurt’s lap.

By the time the wheels squealed and touched down, both men were panting and satisfied.

“I think I’m going to like California,” Kurt said.

“Are you kidding? I’m already thinking about the flight home,” Blaine said with a smirk.

 

 

**“I Have Nothing” by Whitney Houston**


	20. Chapter 20

“What do you want to do first?” Blaine asked with a smile.

Kurt was practically hopping around the room in excitement. They’d only been in the hotel a half hour, just long enough to unpack, or long enough for Kurt to hang up most of his clothes. He said it would take him two hours to do it properly. Blaine had just smiled and nodded, not wanting to get into another lecture on clothing care. It was adorable, even if it was irritating at the same time.

“Rodeo drive? The Hollywood Walk of Fame? Just to start,” Kurt said. He’d changed into his comfortable boots, though he’d said they didn’t set off the outfit as perfectly as his not-so-comfortable boots.

“Sure. Sounds good,” Blaine replied, grabbing Kurt’s sweater in case he got cold later. Kurt saw and gave him a sweet smile. Blaine couldn’t resist those lips and gave him a soft kiss, quickly swiping his tongue across his full lower lip. Kurt hummed deep in his throat.

“Shall we go?” Blaine said, walking to the door.

Kurt stood there for a moment, touching his lips, looking undecided. Then he looked out the window of their hotel and nodded, quickly leaving the room. It gave Blaine a sense of pride in his ability to kiss if he’d almost gotten Kurt to forget the shopping and sightseeing offered by Hollywood.

The rest of the day was spent ogling designer fashions – Kurt refused to let Blaine buy him anything. Of course what Kurt didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. Blaine was keeping a mental list of what he’d liked the most. They ate an early dinner at Spago which had Kurt raving, telling Blaine about all the stars that had been seen there. Moving on to the Hollywood Walk of Fame, they took pictures with their favorite stars. Kurt forgot about his need to keep his pants clean and sat reverently next to the star of Barbra Streisand, smiling angelically at Blaine. He didn’t think he would ever get over the perfection that was Kurt’s pure and beautiful face. Then Kurt got rather irate and went on for at least twenty minutes when he realized Patti Lupone didn’t have a star. Then they saw Bernadette Peters’ star and he was able to calm down long enough for a picture.

As the sun was setting, Blaine drove them in the shiny silver rental car out to the Hollywood sign. Helping each other, they climbed down to sit just below the sign, watching the view of the city below.

Kurt leaned into Blaine’s side, sighing happily. “This has been one of the best days ever, Blaine,” he said.

Blaine squeezed him closer. “I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. You deserve it.”

“Did you have fun? I’m not the only one who deserves a good time, you know,” Kurt said, looking at him, concerned.

“Of course I had fun. Don’t be silly. And there’s more to come. We don’t have to go to the Expo until the afternoon tomorrow and over the next few days we’ll have plenty of time to do more. I was thinking on our next free day we could drive up to San Francisco,” Blaine answered.

Kurt gasped. “Really? Can we go to the wharf? And Alcatraz?”

“Alcatraz? Really, Kurt? I didn’t figure you for a prison history buff,” Blaine said with a grin.

Kurt smacked him lightly. “I have many layers, Blaine.”

Blaine tugged at his sweater, button up combination. “Yeah, I know about you and your layers.”

“Well, if you’d drive us back to the hotel, I’d let you get rid of a few of these layers,” Kurt said suggestively, nuzzling Blaine’s neck with his nose.

“Let’s go,” Blaine said, hopping up and practically running to the car. Kurt’s laughter followed behind him. He turned to watch his boyfriend make his way to the car. He’d never figured this level of happiness was even possible, much less possible for him. But Kurt had changed his entire world and there was nothing he wouldn’t do for him. There was a decision to be made, though. And every time he got close to a decision, something made him step back.

They made it back to the hotel in record time, Blaine spurred on by the fact that Kurt’s fingers kept exploring his pants as he drove. Running to their room, Blaine picked up Kurt and carried him into their room and threw him on the bed before pouncing on him, slanting their mouths together. Kurt made a surprised sound at the unveiled passion Blaine was showing and gave into the kiss, opening his mouth under Blaine’s onslaught. He moved one hand in Blaine’s hair and grabbed onto his curls, tugging lightly, knowing Blaine loved the feeling. Remembering a promise made a while ago, he broke off the kiss.

“Blaine?”

“Yeah, baby?” Blaine asked, kissing down the side of Kurt’s face and onto his neck.

Kurt’s eyes fluttered shut, instantly distracted by Blaine’s magical lips and tongue. “Blaine, stop. I have a, um, request.”

Blaine looked up quickly, his golden eyes darkened with lust and interest. “Sure, babe. What do you want to try?”

“I’d, uh, like to, uh, top,” he stuttered out, turning red. Seeing Blaine’s face freeze, he quickly amended. “If you were still willing to give it a try.”

Blaine rolled off of Kurt and lay there staring at the ceiling.

Kurt moved over to him and turned his face so they were looking at each other. “Blaine, honey, you don’t have to. I would never ask you to do something you weren’t comfortable with. Our sex life is so freaking amazing. It was just curiosity, since I’ve never, um, done that.”

“Neither have I,” Blaine said quietly.

“Huh?” Kurt asked, confused. Then he made the connection. “You’ve never bottomed?”

“Well, once. My very first time having any kind of sex. Never again, though,” he admitted, not looking at Kurt.

Kurt was all too familiar with Blaine’s expression. Something had happened during that one encounter and he was being haunted by it. “Blaine, what happened? You can talk to me.”

Blaine looked at him and saw only compassion. His first instinct was to change the subject, but he realized that Kurt had shared his darkest moments with Blaine, he’d be a hypocrite if he didn’t share as well. “Um. Well, the guy was older. I was fifteen. He was eighteen. I thought he was really into me. He took me on a few dates and we made out for a while several times. I know now it was only a crush, but at the time, I could have sworn I was in love with him. Then one night, he invited me over. He’d graduated from school that year and had his own apartment. We had a few beers and started making out. It got hot and heavy pretty fast. I was excited, you know, at that age, it’s all we seem to think about. Then we were naked and he, uh, just kinda shoved it in. No preparation, lube, nothing.” Blaine heard Kurt’s gasp, but kept talking before he lost his nerve. “I tried not to scream, but I started crying. I couldn’t help it, it hurt so fucking bad. He just kinda laughed and kept going. I wasn’t even hard anymore. All I could think was that I’d done something wrong and that was why I wasn’t enjoying it. When he finished, he just rolled off and went to sleep. I cried for a while more then went home. It hurt to walk, sit, anything. After that, I didn’t have sex for another year. I insisted that I top exclusively. If the guy wasn’t down with that, we just didn’t have sex. I’d done a lot of research during that year and realized how it was supposed to be done, with the lube and all. I made sure I never hurt anyone in that way, and I never did.” He went quiet, feeling tired after talking for so long.

“Thank you for telling me, Blaine. I’m sorry your first time was like that. I love you,” Kurt said, leaning down to gently kiss him. “I would never purposely hurt you, Blaine. But you know I would also never push you to do something you aren’t comfortable with, just like you wouldn’t with me,” he finished quietly. He laid his head on Blaine’s chest, letting Blaine have time to think. He couldn’t believe Blaine had suffered like that his very first time. He felt lucky that Blaine had been his first, knowing he had purposely made sure he was gentle.

“Kurt?” his voice came almost silently.

“Yeah?”

“Will you make love to me?” Blaine asked, his heart pounding nervously.

Kurt leaned up and looked down at him. “Are you sure?”

Blaine nodded.

“Will you teach me what to do so I don’t hurt you?” Kurt asked. He was sure he had the basics down, but there was no way he was going to fake his way through something that had been traumatic for the man he loved.

“Yeah, I can do that,” Blaine said with a small smile.

They undressed each other slowly, taking the time to share soft kisses and caress bits of skin as they were revealed. Finally nude, they stood, clinging together, kissing passionately. Kurt bit and nibbled at Blaine’s top lip as he loved to do and Blaine’s hands roamed down to cup his ass, squeezing gently. Blaine had already set out the supplies they would need and they nervously got into bed. Kurt kissed Blaine once more than slid down his body, stopping here and there to lick or kiss. Getting to the V of his hips, he licked those beautiful lines, loving Blaine’s strong body. Taking Blaine’s straining cock in his mouth, he deep throated him quickly, enjoying the gasp that escaped Blaine’s mouth.

“Baby,” he cried out.

Kurt hummed around him, knowing that drove him crazy. He felt Blaine’s hips buck underneath him and knew he was sufficiently distracted. He grabbed the lube and coated his fingers. Dropping Blaine from his mouth, he leaned up, and slid his tongue into Blaine’s mouth.  They moaned at the contact, both of them tasting Blaine on their tongues. Kurt pulled back and breathed hotly in his ear.

“Are you ready?”

He quickly moved back to Blaine’s mouth, sweeping his tongue across his lips, before plunging deeply into his mouth. He felt Blaine’s nod and closed his eyes, hoping he was going to please Blaine. Slowly, he moved his finger into position and gently circled around Blaine’s hole. He heard a gasp and looked up quickly.

“Okay?” he asked, breathless at touching Blaine like this.

“Oh god, yes,” Blaine panted. “Go ahead, push in just a little.”

Kurt obeyed, sliding just in past his fingernail. Blaine’s hips shot off the bed and this time Kurt knew he was okay. That look on his face was pure passionate need.

“More, Kurt, please,” he moaned.

Pushing just a bit more, up to his second knuckle, he paused his movements so Blaine could adjust to the stretch. He kissed and nipped around Blaine’s chest, flicking his tongue across his nipples. Blaine was getting into it already, moving his hips slightly against Kurt’s finger.

“A-Another finger, baby,” he stammered, pushing against Kurt again.

Kurt put more lube on his fingers and so slowly, he inserted two fingers, awed by the feeling of his body penetrating Blaine’s. His own cock was hard and straining, though he was still stressed over possibly hurting his love.

“That feels,” Blaine started, swallowing loudly. “That feels fucking amazing, baby.” He gave his hips a light roll and moaned before rolling again until he was fucking himself down onto Kurt’s fingers.

“You’re so tight,” Kurt said, amazed.

“More, baby, please more. Another finger,” Blaine said, a sheen of sweat covering his chest and face.

Repeating the process of lubing and inserting slowly, he soon had Blaine thrusting down onto his fingers, crying out in pleasure. Kurt leaned down and took his cock in his mouth, opening his throat to take him as deeply as he could. Blaine cried out so loudly, it was almost a yell.

“Shit, Kurt. Fuck! Oh god, baby, I need you. Please. Fuck me, please,” he begged, grabbing Kurt’s hair and pulling him off his cock. He moaned again, seeing Kurt’s lust blown eyes and swollen, spit shiny lips.

Kurt sat back, slowly removing his fingers, in awe over the way Blaine’s body looked as he clenched around the air.

“Hurry, baby, please,” Blaine said, thrashing his head around on the pillow, grasping the blankets in his hands.

Kurt slid the condom on and covered himself liberally in lube before moving hesitantly into position. “Okay, Blaine, honey. I’m just going to line up and you help me with how fast to go, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, please, Kurt,” he panted.

Kurt nudged Blaine’s hole and began sliding in so slowly he gritted his teeth. The sensation was so new. Blaine had given him blowjobs, so he’d had something hot and wet around him before. But this. This was tight and so unbelievably hot, he thought he might explode. “Shit, Blaine. You’re so tight.”

“Uhhh,” Blaine replied, unable to believe the delicious sense of being filled by the man he loved. There was no pain, no pinch or painful stretch. It was just heat and Kurt. “More, baby.”

Kurt eased deeper and they both cried out. Blaine lifted his hips, taking Kurt deeper, raising his confidence as it continued to be pain free. Biting his lips, he threw his hips up, seating Kurt to the hilt in one swift motion.

Kurt shrieked and Blaine was just as loud. “Oh my god, baby. You feel unbelievable,” Blaine breathed.

“You. Too. I need to move, Blaine, honey, please,” Kurt begged.

“Yes, yes, please,” Blaine agreed.

Kurt undulated his hips and began a hesitant rhythm, spurred on by the sounds Blaine was making. He knew he wasn’t going to last long. The heat and tightness was too intense.

“Touch yourself,” Kurt instructed. “I want to see you come.”

Blaine moaned and palmed himself, stroking quickly, opening his eyes to watch Kurt above him.

Kurt experimented with the different ways to move his hips and when Blaine cried out and rolled his eyes back, he realized he’d found that tiny bundle of nerves. He kept his hips going in the same direction and soon Blaine was yelling gutturally, coming all over his stomach and chest. At the sight, Kurt was pushed over the edge and came hard, the orgasm seeming to go on and on until he sat there, limp and exhausted. Remembering how tender he was the first time, he eased out of Blaine slowly before getting off the bed to dispose of the condom. He went into the bathroom and got a towel wet with hot water. Coming back, he saw Blaine hadn’t even moved, was just laying there breathing hard. Kurt felt a spurt of pride, knowing he was responsible for the blissed out look on his boyfriend’s face. Gently, he cleaned Blaine’s stomach and chest, before wiping off the rest of the lube. Blaine hissed a little, but quickly relaxed under Kurt’s gentle hands. He threw the towel in the direction of the bathroom and climbed on the bed, helping Blaine under the covers.

“Does it hurt, Blaine?” he finally asked, needing to know.

Blaine kept his eyes closed and smiled, a dopey, satisfied smile. “A little sore, but it feels good in a way, too.”

Kurt let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. “Good.”

Blaine heard him sigh and looked over at him. “Kurt that was one of the most incredible, erotic, bestest sexual experiences of my life.”

“Bestest?” Kurt teased lightly.

“I have no vocabulary. Sue me. I’ve just been thoroughly fucked and I’m damn happy about it,” Blaine said with a tired grin.

“Well alright then,” Kurt said and kissed him. “Sleep sweet, Blaine.”

“Love you, baby,” he whispered as he fell asleep.

“I love you, too,” Kurt said to the sleeping man at his side.

 

. . . . .

 

Blaine woke up as the sun was rising, the time difference waking him up earlier than he normally would be. He felt a tender stiffness in his body and smiled. It wasn’t unpleasant and only reminded him of the previous night’s activities. Sitting up, he looked at Kurt. He had one hand over his head and one hand curled up under his chin. His hair was mussed and his mouth was slightly open as he slept. Blaine thought he’d never looked so beautiful. Hell, the angels must deal with jealousy on a daily basis due to the man beside him. He got up and stretched, enjoying the pops and snaps his body made. He padded to the window naked. They were on the twentieth floor, so he didn’t have to worry about being seen. The city wasn’t awake yet and with the smog hanging over it, it wasn’t that much to look at. Turning back to the vision in the bed, he thought about his relationship with Kurt. There was still a decision awaiting him. One answer left him with a stone cold rock in his gut. One answer left him with his heart being ripped out. He remembered the first time he’d seen Kurt. He’d been such an asshole to him, had bullied him unmercifully. And yet somehow, the universe had seen fit to turn it all around so now the angel was his. Wandering back to the window, he agonized over his choices before grimly making his decision.

. . . . .

“So we’ll have the opening group number and then Blaine will have the first solo. Keep your eye on the schedule posted over there near the curtain. You need to be backstage fifteen minutes before you are due to perform. Those of you not performing after the group number will be taking a seat in the audience. We have a section cordoned off for us. Be polite to other performers and show respect. Questions? Good. Hands in,” Mr. Schue said and put his hand forward. Everyone gathered around as tightly as possible and put their hands in.

“DALTON!” they yelled and cheered.

Their opening number went off without a hitch, getting the audience to their feet and clapping wildly for them. Blaine had to stay backstage and wait through a couple songs before his solo was up. Kurt gave him a kiss on the way to take a seat in the audience. He wasn’t singing anymore today, so he got to enjoy the show.

“Good luck, Blaine,” he said smiling broadly.

“Thanks, baby,” Blaine said and returned the smile nervously.

Kurt looked at him in confusion. “Are you nervous?”

“Nah. I think that burrito was a bad choice for lunch,” he replied, rubbing his stomach.

“I tried to tell you,” Kurt said. “Do you want me to find you some medicine?”

“No, thanks though. I’m just going to drink some water and relax before the song. I’ll be watching for you,” he said, kissing Kurt softly.

“I’ll be there,” Kurt said.

. . . . .

“From Dalton Academy, in New York City, please welcome Blaine Anderson!” the emcee announced.

Kurt jumped to his feet, cheering wildly.

Blaine looked stunning in the simple, close cut blue suit. He took the microphone and looked around. Kurt waved and beamed when Blaine found him and smiled in return. He looked like he was feeling better which relieved Kurt’s mind. It would have been awful to have to perform with an upset stomach. The music started and Kurt looked around in confusion. This wasn’t the solo Blaine had practiced. Blaine grinned at him and winked. Blushing, Kurt sat back to listen.

 

_I gotta take a little time_

_A little time to think things over_

_I better read between the lines_

_In case I need it when I'm older_

Blaine looked out at Kurt, hoping he realized that the things Blaine had to deal with were outside of their relationship. There was a lot to get through, problems he created, but it didn’t change the love he felt for Kurt. He’d made his choice and he would not veer from the path he chose.

_Now this mountain I must climb_

_Feels like a world upon my shoulders_

_Through the clouds I see love shine_

_It keeps me warm as life grows colder_

_In my life there's been heartache and pain_

_I don't know if I can face it again_

_Can't stop now, I've traveled so far_

_To change this lonely life_

_I wanna know what love is_

_I want you to show me_

_I wanna feel what love is_

_I know you can show me_

_I'm gonna take a little time_

_A little time to look around me_

_I've got nowhere left to hide_

_It looks like love has finally found me_

Blaine was lost in the music, in Kurt’s wide eyes. He gestured to him, hopefully making him realize he was responsible for the change in his life.

_In my life there's been heartache and pain_

_I don't know if I can face it again_

_I can't stop now, I've traveled so far_

_To change this lonely life_

_I wanna know what love is_

_I want you to show me_

_I wanna feel what love is_

_I know you can show me_

The curtain behind Blaine rose and revealed a fully robed choir who began singing backup. The audience was on their feet and tears were streaming down Kurt’s face.

_I wanna know what love is_

_I want you to show me_

_And I wanna feel, I want to feel what love is_

_And I know, I know you can show me_

_Let's talk about love_

_I wanna know what love is, the love that you feel inside_

_I want you to show me, and I'm feeling so much love_

_I wanna feel what love is, no, you just cannot hide_

_I know you can show me, yeah_

_I wanna know what love is, let's talk about love_

_I want you to show me, I wanna feel it too_

_I wanna feel what love is, I want to feel it too_

_And I know and I know, I know you can show me_

_Show me love is real, yeah_

_I wanna know what love is... I wanna know…_

 

The applause was deafening. Instead of leaving the stage, Blaine raised his hand up, trying to get people to calm down. It took a few moments and Kurt was wondering what was going on. Why hadn’t he left the stage? Did he have another number?

“Please, ladies and gentleman, if you could indulge me for a moment,” Blaine said, and people took their seats, finally becoming quiet.

“I haven’t always been the nicest of people. I have more skeletons in my closet than most,” he chuckled and the audience laughed lightly. “But someone came into my life recently who, like the song says, showed me what love is, what it feels like, and how it can change your life for the better. Kurt, could you come up here, please?”

Kurt stayed frozen in his seat, eyes wide and face red.

Colton pushed at him. “Go on, Kurt.”

“Ladies and gentleman, Kurt is a bit shy, could you help encourage him to come up here?” Blaine announced.

The audience began chanting ‘Kurt, Kurt, Kurt’ and cheering as he finally stood and made his way to the stage. He climbed the stairs, looking like a deer in the headlights.

The theater became quiet as he came to stand next to Blaine who turned to him.

“Kurt, knowing you and loving you has made me a better man. You’ve shown me how to look outside myself and my needs and truly care for another person. An eternity wouldn’t be long enough to show you how I feel about you,” he said. Pulling a small box out of his pocket, he got down on one knee.

Kurt was quivering before him, knees shaking, unable to believe what was happening. Was he going to wake up? Had he fallen asleep during the performances.

Opening the box, he smiled up at Kurt. “I don’t know much about eternity, but I swear to love you every minute of every day of this life we’ve been given. Would you do me the incredible honor of becoming my husband?”

The audience shot back to their feet, yelling and shouting, applauding as loud as they can.

Kurt stood there for a moment, tears sliding down his face. “Yes,” he whispered.

“Excuse me, folks, could you let Kurt give me an answer,” Blaine said cheerfully. “What was that, babe?”

Holding the microphone to Kurt’s mouth, he grinned. Kurt gave a loud “yes!” that was heard around the room.

Blaine stood and grabbed Kurt in his arms, swinging him around. “I love you, Kurt Hummel.”

“I love you, Blaine,” Kurt whispered tearfully.

Setting him down, he took the platinum band out and pushed it onto Kurt’s finger. Kurt barely saw the fine row of diamonds and the sparkle that would have caught his attention any other time. He was too busy staring at Blaine, his fiancé.

“Congratulations to the newly engaged couple! There will be a ten minute intermission before the next performances,” the emcee announced. The curtain came down and Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine.

“What brought this on?” he had to know.

“It was either risk losing you someday to some guy who could make you happier, which killed me inside when I thought about it. Or propose to you, which scared me to death, but ensures that you are mine until we die,” Blaine said honestly.

“I would never leave you, Blaine. There will never be anyone but you, how could you even think that? I don’t want you to propose just because you’re scared of losing me,” Kurt said, his heart breaking.

“No, baby, no. I’ve been wanting to propose for a while and it scared me, cuz well, I haven’t had the best track record with relationships. But when I started thinking about what could happen if I didn’t get over myself, what I would be giving up; namely you, then I made the decision. I want to spend the rest of my life with you because I love you. I want you to belong to me in every way a person can belong to someone,” he said, seeing the relief on Kurt’s face.

“I do belong to you. And yes, I’ll marry you,” Kurt said, wrapping his arms around Blaine.

They stood there, hugging, nuzzling against one another until they were ushered away by the stage manager.

That night, as they lay tangled against each other, Kurt wiggled his fingers in the air, seeing the sparkle of his ring. Kurt Anderson. He could get used to that. Snuggling into his fiancé, he quickly fell asleep.

 

. . . . .

Two days later, while they were going on rides at Disney Land, Blaine got a text which dropped his stomach into the ground.

_Your parent’s house was broken into. No injuries. No theft. Looks like a warning. Be careful._

Looking over at his fiancé, he came to a realization. He was going to have to tell Kurt. All of it.

 

. . . . .

**Song: “I Want To Know What Love Is” by Foreigner**


	21. Chapter 21

Blaine woke suddenly. A sound had pulled him from sleep and he lay there for a moment, searching it out. There it was again. A sniffle? Reaching over, he found Kurt’s side of the bed was empty. He sat up and saw Kurt’s shadow in a chair near the window.

“Baby?”

He heard a quick sniffle and a cough. “Go back to sleep, Blaine. I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Are you okay?” Blaine asked, rubbing his eyes.

“I’m fine, really. Get some more sleep,” Kurt said gently.

Blaine knew he was lying. He knew Kurt and he could hear something in his voice that wasn’t fine. He got up and stretched before going over to sit in the chair across from Kurt.

Kurt was curled up in the chair, holding his forehead in his hand. “I said I’m fine, Blaine.”

“I know you did, babe. But fine doesn’t sound like you sound. What’s going on?”

“We’re engaged,” Kurt said, his voice trembling.

Blaine felt a pit open in his stomach. Was he going to back out of it? “Yeah, we are,” he said hesitantly.

“We told your mom,” Kurt continued, and Blaine could see tears streaking down his face in the pale light from outside.

Blaine moved to kneel beside his chair. “Baby, what is it? We did tell my mom, did you not want to? I thought we agreed we wanted everyone to know?” He took Kurt’s hand in his.

“We did, and I did want to. It’s just… I just wish I could tell my dad,” Kurt said, his voice breaking. “He was my best friend, my biggest supporter. He always wanted me to find love. I think he would really like you,” he said, running his hand down Blaine’s face with a sad smile. “I am so happy, happier than I’ve ever been in my life, and neither of my parents are around to see it.”

“What was your dad like?” Blaine asked, settling in next to the chair.

“He was a little taller than me with blue eyes. He always told me I had my mom’s eyes, because they can never make up their mind what color to be. Kinda like she was,” Kurt chuckled sadly. “He always wore a baseball cap. He loved cars. We owned a mechanic shop and I grew up learning everything there was to know about cars. After Mom died, we just got closer. I came out to him in my sophomore year and he said he already knew. I don’t know why I thought he wouldn’t know, I was into fashion more than football. But I guess, I was more hiding from myself than him. He was supportive in every part of my life. One time our choir teacher wouldn’t let me audition for a solo because it was supposed to be sung by a girl. Dad went to the school and argued with them until they agreed to let me audition,” Kurt said, smiling at the memory.

Blaine grinned. “I bet you got it, didn’t you?”

Kurt shook his head sadly, his smile vanishing. “No. I, um, I blew the final note, a high F. I knew I could do it, but I blew it on purpose. Dad had gotten a couple phone calls telling him his son was a fag. He was so hurt and upset. I knew if I got the solo it would just get worse for him. So I made sure I didn’t get it.”

Blaine couldn’t believe the selflessness of the man before him. To give up something he wanted so desperately so his dad didn’t have to suffer. “Did your dad find out?”

“Yeah, he was pretty mad. But I still think it was the right decision. My junior year started off pretty good. I mean the bullying was bad, worse than ever actually. But Dad was happy. I’d introduced him to the mom of a guy in my choir class and they’d been dating for a while. Then he had the heart attack. He was in a coma for two weeks before his body just gave out,” Kurt said, sniffling. “I remember bits and pieces of my life with Mom. But I remember every moment of life with Dad. He was the most important part of my world. Life was so empty without him. I lived with my aunt until I graduated. She hated me because I’m gay. She’s one of those Christian’s who believe all gays will burn in hell. Anyway, as soon as I moved in with her and figured out how life was going to be, I began putting all of my efforts into my grades and getting ready to graduate and get the hell away from her and Lima. I worked at the shop, my dad’s friend took it over. I could have stayed there and ran it, but there was no way I was going to stay in Lima forever.” Kurt shuddered at the thought. “But I worked every day and saved up as much as I could. I worked on my grades and extracurricular activities so I’d have a stellar application. I found Dalton and knew it was where I wanted to go. I got accepted, hopped on a bus after graduation and never looked back. I stayed in a crappy motel for a week. During my tour of Dalton, I met this gorgeous guy who turned out to be a complete asshole,” Kurt grinned. “Oh wait, that was you!”

Blaine groaned in embarrassment. “Do you think you’ll ever be able to forgive me for that?”

Kurt ran his fingers through Blaine’s curls. “I did a long time ago, sweetie. But I can still tease you about it.”

“I bet your dad would have hung me out to dry,” Blaine said.

“There’s no question,” Kurt laughed. “He was very protective. But if he knew you now, he would love you. He would be so grateful for everything you’ve done for me, how you’ve loved me.” Kurt slid off the chair and curled up into Blaine’s lap on the floor.

“I hope so. I want you to be proud of me, of the person I am,” Blaine said.

Kurt looked up at him and grasped his chin. “I am proud of you, Blaine. You are an extraordinary person. I wish both of my parents had had a chance to meet you.”

“Well, maybe someday we can go there and you can introduce me,” Blaine said lightly.

Kurt stared at him. “You’d do that? Visit their graves with me?”

Blaine hugged him close. “Of course I would, baby. I would be honored to meet the parents of the man I love.”

Feeling tears coming again, Kurt buried his face against Blaine’s chest. They sat there for a long time, Kurt weeping silently. The ache in his chest for his parents would never go away, but maybe, with this man beside him, maybe it would get easier.

. . . . .

“From Dalton Academy, please welcome Blaine Anderson and Kurt Hummel,” the emcee announced. The two walked onto the stage, Blaine taking a seat at the piano and Kurt grabbing a microphone. Blaine grinned at him and began playing. Kurt was always mesmerized when he saw Blaine play, he had to concentrate on the song so he didn’t space off. Blaine nodded to him and Kurt began to sing.  

 

_(Kurt)_

_I've been alone_

_Surrounded by darkness_

_I've seen how heartless_

_The world can be_

_(Blaine)_

_I've seen you crying_

_You felt like it's hopeless_

_I'll always do my best_

_To make you see_

_(Both)_

_Baby, you're not alone_

_Cause you're here with me_

_And nothing's ever gonna bring us down_

_Cause nothing can keep me from lovin' you_

_And you know it's true_

_It don't matter what'll come to be_

_Our love is all we need to make it through_

_(Kurt)_

_Now I know it ain't easy_

_But it ain't hard trying_

_Every time I see you smiling_

_And I feel you so close to me_

_And you tell me_

_(Both)_

_Baby, you're not alone_

_Cause you're here with me_

_And nothing's ever gonna bring us down_

_Cause nothing can keep me from lovin' you_

_And you know it's true_

_It don't matter what'll come to be_

_Our love is all we need to make it through_

Blaine grinned at Kurt as he took the next verse.

_(Blaine)_

_I still have trouble_

_I trip and stumble_

_Trying to make sense of things sometimes_

_I look for reasons_

_But I don't need 'em_

_All I need is to look in your eyes_

_And I realize_

There was no more audience. It was just the two of them singing to one another. Kurt knew he could see Blaine’s heart in the loving gaze he was giving him. This moment would be true for the rest of their lives.

_(Both)_

_Baby I'm not alone_

_Cause you're here with me_

_And nothing's ever gonna take us down_

_Cause nothing can keep me from lovin' you_

_And you know it's true_

_It don't matter what'll come to be_

_Our love is all we need to make it through, ooh_

_Cause you're here with me_

_And nothing's ever gonna bring us down_

_Cause nothing, nothing, nothing can keep me from lovin' you_

_And you know it's true_

_It don't matter what'll come to be_

_You know our love is all we need_

_Our love is all we need… to make it through…_

 

. . . . .

The Warbler’s team were enjoying a final meal in L.A. before the trip home. The Expo had been a resounding success. They’d even been offered funding by several different groups and invitations to perform at various venues. Everyone was having a good time, even Mr. Schue had finally loosened up. He’d given them a nice speech but managed to finish it by telling them now was not the time to start slacking since the competition season was upon them. Everyone booed him until he sat down and had a drink. That was the key. Get him liquored up and he became a normal guy. Colton suddenly got up from the table and walked away, his face pale. Kurt watched him go, concerned.

Blaine looked down as his phone beeped, alerting him to a text. Before he could check it, Colton came back and whispered in his ear.

“I need to talk to you. Now,” he said urgently.

Blaine looked and saw that he was really upset. “Okay. Be right back, babe,” he told Kurt, kissing his forehead.

“Alright,” Kurt said, concerned.

Blaine and Colton went outside the restaurant. “What’s up?”

“I, uh, just got a call from Dalton. They still have me listed as the resident of your room since we didn’t officially switch. Blaine, your room was broken into and ransacked. I don’t know if anything was stolen, but apparently, it’s trashed pretty bad,” Colton told him, looking at him nervously.

“Shit,” Blaine said, his face going white. He knew who did it. He also knew it was his fault. He checked his text message. _Your room was hit. No witnesses. No ID on mole yet. Be careful._ “Fuck.”

“Blaine? I, uh, don’t know what’s going on,” Colton started.

“You don’t want to,” Blaine interrupted him. “Thank you for telling me. Don’t worry about the room, I’ll talk to Admin when we get back and straighten out everything.”

“Uh, okay. They said they put a new door on. You can pick up the key at the R.A.’s room,” Colton told him.

“Thanks,” Blaine said, standing there, staring off into space.

“I’m gonna go back inside,” Colton said, knowing Blaine wasn’t listening anymore.

“Yeah,” he said, not seeing Colton walk back into the restaurant. He dialed a number on his phone.

“What the hell happened?” he asked as soon as his call was answered.

“We were doing rounds around the dorm and between walk-by’s, the room was hit. Door was practically ripped off the hinges. Your stuff was thrown around, bed was ripped apart. Some nasty language painted on the walls. Pictures broken, that kind of stuff. I don’t know if anything was stolen. But it’s definitely not somewhere you’re gonna want to stay,” the man said.

“Keep someone near the room until I get back. Also, I want you to find me an apartment near campus. Furnished with the basics. Two bedrooms, lots of windows, maybe a loft. Put in the best security system you can get, but keep it low profile. I want it to be Alcatraz but look like the Ritz. Got it?” Blaine asked.

“You got it, boss man. I, uh, have some other news that’s not gonna make you too happy,” the man reported.

“Just spit it out,” Blaine said, not in the mood to beat around the bush.

“Your dad knows what’s going on. The upper management thought since your folks place was broken into, then yours, that he needed to know. Not your personal business, but that some shit’s been going down,” he said.

“Fuck. Just what I needed. Alright. Thanks for everything. We’ll be back tomorrow afternoon, so have the apartment ready by then. Is the time constraint going to be a problem?” Blaine asked.

“Nope. You know we can work fast when we need to,” the man told him.

“Good. I’m also going to want two guys at the apartment at all times. Unobtrusive. See if they can get an apartment next door or something like that,” Blaine instructed.

“You got it. I’ll send you the apartment info as soon as we have it. See you when you get back,” the man said.

“Thanks man,” Blaine said and they hung up.

Shit, shit, shit, Blaine thought. This was not good. How was he going to explain all of this to Kurt? He thought quickly and zipped off a quick text to Colton.

_Did you tell Kurt?_

Colton answered quickly. _No._

_Don’t. I’ll handle it._

Blaine returned to his seat next to Kurt and smiled at him. There was no need to ruin the evening. They had one last night to enjoy. It would be pointless to get Kurt upset when it could wait until they got back. He would tell him on the way to the dorm. Then they could see what was done and move what they could to the apartment. There was a way he could smooth the way, though, he realized.

“Everything okay?” Kurt whispered.

“Just fine, babe,” Blaine said, kissing him softly.

When they got back to the room, they undressed quickly and made love. It was intense, but gentle all at the same time. They showered together afterward and snuggled in the bed, wrapped around each other.

“I have a question for you,” Blaine said.

“Mm?” Kurt responded, tucked into Blaine’s chest.

“How would you feel about living off campus?” He asked.

Kurt sat up and looked at him. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I want to get an apartment and I want you to live with me,” Blaine said with a smile.

Kurt’s face lit up. “Really? Our own place?”

“Yep. And you would have sole control over decorating,” Blaine said enticingly.

Bouncing on the bed, Kurt clapped his hands. “Oh, Blaine, that sounds wonderful. No more dormitory! And this means I get to shop for furniture and paint. But, I can’t afford it. I mean, I’ll save some money because I won’t be living on campus, but I’ll have to get a job to afford rent and utilities and all that,” Kurt said, his excitement waning.

Blaine grabbed his hands. “It’s my idea and I’ll handle all the costs. Baby, you’re going to have to get used to me spending money on you and us. It really isn’t a big deal. I want to make your life easier. Let me do this, okay?”

Kurt looked at him for a moment. “Alright. But I am going to pitch in,” he said stubbornly.

“That’s fine,” Blaine assured him. “So you’ll move in with me?”

“Yes!” Kurt exclaimed, throwing himself on Blaine’s chest and hugging him, raining kisses on his face. They laughed and kissed for a time. Then Kurt began bringing up idea after idea for paint schemes and furnishings. Blaine listened, content to let him make all the decisions. Whatever it took to make Kurt safe and happy, he was more than happy to do. He didn’t let himself think of how Kurt was going to react when they saw the dorm. Not yet. They had this night. Maybe he’d get lucky and time would stop with them here, happy and excited for their future together.

. . . . .

In the cab on the way back to Dalton, Blaine took a phone call. Guilt put a rock in his stomach. He hated that he was lying to Kurt and keeping things from him. It had to be the best thing, though. For now.

“Shit!” he yelled out. “What the hell happened? Okay, damn it. Nothing better be gone.”

“I can’t believe you still haven’t told him,” Colton said on the other end. “I’ll go along with it for now, but you really can’t keep stuff like this from him.”

“You let me worry about that,” Blaine said, a blatant warning in his voice.

“Fine. Talk to you later,” Colton said hastily.

“Thanks man,” Blaine said, and they hung up.

“What’s going on, Blaine?” Kurt asked, worry etched on his fine features.

“That was Colton. Housing called him cuz our room is still listed as his. Kurt, someone broke in and ransacked the room,” he said as gently as he could. He cursed internally when Kurt’s face went deathly pale.

“Were we robbed?” he asked quietly.

Blaine took his hand and rubbed it briskly. “I don’t know, babe. We’ll have to see. Apparently it happened a couple days ago and they had the door replaced. But we won’t be able to stay there,” he said.

“Where are we going to stay?” Kurt worried.

“I heard from my realtor and we’re pretty close to being able to sign on an apartment nearby. We’ll stay at a hotel until it’s ready,” Blaine assured him. “At least classes don’t start for another week, so we’ll have time to get situated.”

“You seem so calm about this,” Kurt noticed. Blaine’s expression had stayed the same the whole time.

“I’m trying to keep my temper. Otherwise I’d be yelling and screaming and I’ve come to realize that that kind of stuff isn’t very productive,” he replied with a grim smile.

Kurt squeezed his hand. “I appreciate that. You’re so wonderful, Blaine. You make me feel safe.”

Guilt ate at him. All of this was happening because of him. Kurt would be perfectly safe if he wasn’t around. But he couldn’t think about that right now. The cab pulled into the school and they got out and unloaded their luggage. They made their way to their dorm room, stopping at the R.A.’s room first to get the new key. The R.A. looked at them sympathetically and told them what he knew, which wasn’t much more than they already heard.

They got to the room and looked at each other. “Do you want me to go in first?” Blaine offered.

“No, it’s okay. We’ll get through this together,” Kurt said, a small smile on his lips.

Blaine nodded and unlocked the door. They both stepped inside and froze. Kurt gasped and Blaine cursed loudly. Saying the room had been ransacked was an understatement. It looked like a tornado and earthquake had teamed up to utterly destroy the room. The comforter on the bed had been slit open, feathers and fuzz was spread around the room like snow. The mattress and pillows had been likewise split open. Above the bed, there was spray paint. _Die Fags_ was there in bright red paint, dripping slowly down like blood. Kurt whimpered and Blaine wrapped his arm around him. Their desks had been chopped up like kindling, pictures were all smashed, glass was everywhere.

Kurt walked gingerly to the closet and opened it. All of his clothes were ripped and looked wet with some mystery substance that Kurt was not eager to define. He walked around, touching things here and there, trying to wrap his mind around what would make someone do this. Bending down, he picked up his pictures. Most of them were damaged beyond repair, ripped and burned. Picking up the heavy wood frame that held the most precious of all, he gasped out a sob. The picture of him, his mom and dad, was ripped right across their faces, like someone had just sliced right through it. He knelt there in the broken glass, clutching the picture to his chest, rocking back and forth. His entire life had been violated, ripped apart, because someone hated him so much.

“Why?” he sobbed. “Why would someone do this?”

Blaine came and sat beside him. “I don’t know, baby. I’m so sorry. Let’s grab what we can salvage and get out of here.”

“Did anything of yours get ruined?” Kurt asked, looking at him with concern.

“Pretty much everything. They even smashed my guitar,” Blaine said bitterly.

“Oh, sweetie. I’m so sorry,” Kurt said and hugged Blaine close.

They were still embracing there on the floor when there was a hesitant knock. They looked up and saw Colton, Jason, and many of the Warblers.

“We, uh, heard what happened and wanted to help,” Wes said quietly.

“Thanks, man,” Blaine said gratefully.

The group spent the next half hour sorting and picking through things. Someone had brought boxes and they packed what they could. They would need to replace some of their school books, but luckily they had taken their computers with them, so those were safe. Kurt was also grateful that he had packed so thoroughly. His favorite pieces of clothing were safe, though he would have to supplement his cold weather wardrobe. It had been warm in L.A., so he’d left most of his winter stuff here. Nobody said out loud what the mystery substance on his clothes were, but they all knew what it was.

While they were packing, Blaine got a text with an address in it. _All ready to go. Key is at front desk. Neighbors directly across the hall are us. Instructions for security system are on kitchen counter. Neighbors can help with questions. Awaiting further instruction._

“Kurt, my realtor just texted me. We got the apartment, so we don’t have to stay in a hotel,” he said with a small smile.

“That’s wonderful,” Kurt said with the first genuine smile he’d had in a while.

Two hours later, they had the room cleaned up as best as they could. Blaine had called some people who were going to come in and haul out the garbage and paint the room. They thanked all of their friends and said goodbye. As they waited for the cab, they looked at the small pile of boxes containing what was left from their room.

Blaine rubbed Kurt’s shoulders from behind. “Don’t worry, baby. We’ll get the pictures fixed. Everything else we can replace, I promise.”

“It just seems so pointless. Nothing was missing. Why would someone come in just to wreck the room?” Kurt asked sadly.

Because they were trying to send me a message, Blaine thought. “I don’t know, babe. But the new apartment has a great security system, so we won’t have to worry about it happening again.”

“You trust your agent to pick out an apartment for you?” Kurt asked, looking at him.

“I do. He’s worked for my father for years. I told him what I was looking for and he found something that fit all the criteria I gave him,” Blaine said.

“What was the criteria?” Kurt asked, curious about his new home.

“Ah, you’ll have find out when we get there,” Blaine said with a wink.

“Meanie,” Kurt said, smiling.

“I know,” Blaine answered.

They made it to the apartment building just as the sun was starting to go down. They were both tired from the day of traveling and packing and cleaning. Blaine talked to the front desk, got the keys, and asked them to send someone to bring their stuff up to the apartment. Kurt was impressed and awed by the building. It was very modern, large windows, professional staff. Taking the elevator to the seventeenth floor – Kurt hypnotized by the marble floors –  they got out. Blaine explained that there were four units per floor. Their closest neighbor was across the hall and all the apartments were sound proof. He wiggled his eyebrows at Kurt when he said that, making him blush. He unlocked the door and stepped back so Kurt could walk in.

Kurt’s jaw dropped and he slowly made his way into his new home. He lived here. Unbelievable, he thought. The floors were all dark hardwood, the walls all a light gray. Almost Dior gray, he noted. But it was the windows that caught his attention. Three large windows, probably fifteen to twenty feet tall, surrounded the apartment. Two of them faced west and were right now showing a beautiful sunset. The other window was on the corner of the apartment, facing out across the city.

He heard the doorbell and saw Blaine answer the door. Several men came in with their belongings and directed them to take it all upstairs.

Watching the workers, he saw the apartment was a loft. There were stairs leading up to a room, a bedroom if he was seeing right. Below the loft was a large galley kitchen with a breakfast bar and two stools. There was a small living room set, couch and chair, a wide screen TV, and a coffee table. On the side of the room, he saw two doors. One was a full bathroom and the other was a spare room with another large window.

The men left and Blaine hit a couple buttons on the wall. A beep sounded and Kurt realized it was a security system. He smiled and returned to looking at the large room off the living room.

“I figured that could be our shared office,” Blaine said quietly behind him.

“Perfect,” Kurt whispered. “Blaine this whole place is perfect. It’s beautiful. If I’d been able to put my New York dream apartment into words, it would be this place.” He walked over to the large windows and sighed happily. “It’s almost worth getting our dorm trashed to end up in a place like this. It’s like kismet or something, you know? Like it was meant to be,” he said.

Blaine closed his eyes. He had to tell him. It wasn’t kismet that brought them here. It was Blaine’s doing.

“Kurt, baby, can we talk?” Blaine said, swallowing loudly.

“Of course,” Kurt said, his blue-green eyes sparkling. He went to the couch and sighed as he sank into his comforting softness. He patted the cushion next to him.

Blaine sat down on the opposite side of him and took a deep breath. “There is something you need to know. It’s about me, mostly. And the dorm room,” he began.

“Okay. You can tell me anything, Blaine. I love you,” Kurt said, leaning forward to rub his knee.

“I love you, too, baby,” Blaine said. He only hoped Kurt would still love him when he finished talking.

 

…….

**“Not Alone” by Darren Criss. Yum. If you haven’t heard the song, listen to it!!**


	22. Chapter 22

 “I’m going to start with a bit of my past, okay?” Blaine said. At Kurt’s nod, he began, taking a deep breath. “I don’t really talk about my dad a lot. That’s because we really don’t have much to do with each other. It was the same with my mom until you came along. At least I have her. But with my dad, I think after I came out, he figured he’d lost the son he wanted. The son he could mold into the man he is. I never figured out why it would matter who I slept with, but that’s just close-minded people for you. Anyway, he is a pretty powerful figure in the banking world. Ergo the money I have access to. As much as he didn’t want anything to do with me, he did let me in on some, um, trade secrets, so to speak. He gave me a list of people I could go to in times of need, or when I needed money, or needed odd favors done. I was to memorize the list and then burn it, which I did. I never figured I would have need of any of those names. With practically unlimited money at my fingertips, I didn’t think I would need anything else. Then freshman year of college, I got my ass kicked. I ran my mouth at the wrong time, to the wrong person, and he beat the living shit out of me. I was hospitalized and was really messed up. I know I brought it on myself, but I was so pissed, I wanted revenge. I remembered the list my father gave me and I dialed a number. The man on the other line immediately called me ‘boss man’ and assured me that he could take care of whatever problem I was having. I asked them to beat the crap out of the guy who’d beat me up. And they did. They showed up in black hooded sweatshirts, completely anonymous looking, and worked the guy over. He was in the hospital with worse injuries than me. After that, I started calling those guys up more. To get beer, drugs, whatever it was I wanted. They always made it happen without question. I paid them, they did what I wanted. I never learned any of their names; it didn’t seem to matter to any of us. After I joined the Warbler’s and found a source of contentment in my life, I didn’t need them as much anymore. I stopped smoking pot and drinking so much and just started living life. Then I met you. When I finally got my head out of my ass and realized I cared about you, the protective side of me came to life with a vengeance.”

“Karofsky and Azimio,” Kurt said quietly with a nod. “That was you.”

“Yes, it was. I called in the guys and let them know where to look for those two. I gave instructions to, injure them,” Blaine said, stopping himself from saying ‘maim’ like he’d actually told the guys. “And they did. They are very good at what they do. They never leave evidence or witnesses. Like ghosts, they just go in, do the job and get out.”

“Holy shit. Okay. I didn’t know how you’d done it, but I figured you had something to do with it. I was too excited by the thought that they would suffer for what they’d done to think about the details of how you did it,” Kurt said, his face pale. “What else have you had these men do?”

“The night that you were attacked, I was on my way home from dinner with my mom, you remember?” Kurt nodded. “I stopped off at my room to change and grab some extra clothes. On the way to your room, I saw someone coming toward me. As they got closer, I saw there was blood on their face. I stopped to offer help and realized it was Sebastian. He told me he’d just seen you and he let me know he’d left you razors. I was enraged, Kurt, I couldn’t even see straight. Then I found you, laying there in a puddle of your own blood. You told me you were too tired,” Blaine continued, tears falling silently down his cheeks. “You said you were too dirty and that you didn’t want the ambulance to come and help you. You died in my arms, Kurt. You were dead, you were gone from me. I can’t even begin to tell you what that did to me,” Blaine said. He had to stop for a moment, to gather himself. Swiping at the tears, he felt a soft hand moving his away. Kurt wiped at his tears, sadness in his eyes.

“I’m so sorry, Blaine. That was the most selfish thing I’ve ever done in my life. Please, please forgive me,” Kurt begged, unable to stand the tortured expression on Blaine’s face.

“Of course I forgive you,” Blaine assured him. “I have to keep going though, or I won’t be able to get this all out.” Kurt sat back and nodded, his expression grieved. “After I got your heart going again and went with you to the hospital, it just started eating at me. I knew who had done that to you. I knew who was responsible for the entire situation. Sebastian had sliced your wrists himself by doing what he did. I was filled with rage, so much it seemed like the room was tinted in red. So I made a phone call.”

Kurt took a deep breath, dread settling in his stomach. “What did you do, Blaine?”

Blaine’s face went cold. “I took care of the problem.”

Kurt shook his head, disbelieving. “But Sebastian died from a heroin overdose,” he insisted.

“That is certainly the way it looked. And it looked that way on purpose. If the doctors thought he died from an overdose, they wouldn’t do an autopsy or blood test. They wouldn’t find that the heroin had been tampered with,” Blaine said matter-of-factly.

Standing up, Kurt backed away from Blaine. “You had him killed,” he whispered. His face was even more pale and he was shaking from shock.

“I was sitting there when he died. I had to make sure he didn’t live because of what he did to you,” Blaine stated. “Please come and sit down. I need to finish this,” he said.

Kurt came and sat down in the small chair farthest away from Blaine.

Blaine hung his head, but didn’t try to fight it. “I was notified before we left for California that the group had a mole. Someone found out about what happened to Karofsky and Azimio. They were telling tales to the Smythe family. And they knew that I was behind it. I was warned to get out of town for a while because some of their own men were going to come to Dalton. I arranged for some guards to discreetly watch over the school while we were gone, just as a precaution,” Blaine said.

“The room,” Kurt said dully. “That wasn’t just some random crime, was it?”

“No, it wasn’t. It was retaliation and a warning. My parent’s house was broken into as well. Somebody is telling me to back off. Trust me, I’m taking the warning to heart.”

“This apartment. You sure found it fast. Why do I have a feeling you knew about the dorm room long before we got home? And please don’t lie to me anymore,” Kurt said, tired beyond measure.

“I found out the last night in L.A. I made arrangements to find an apartment that night. They were to find a large apartment with lots of windows and an excellent security system. I want to keep you safe, Kurt. Here you are safe. You weren’t safe at the dorm,” Blaine told him.

Kurt stood and paced in front of the windows. The sun had long since set and it was dark, the only light coming from the kitchen. He found a lamp and turned it on. He looked over at Blaine, paused, then kept pacing.

“We are safe here, Kurt. You don’t have to worry about anyone getting to you here,” Blaine assured him.

“I’m not worried about my safety when it comes to other people,” Kurt told him.

“Good,” Blaine said, his tension easing a bit.

“I’m more worried about the fact that I’m living with a killer.”

Blaine stared at him in surprise.

“Why are you looking at me like that? You told me you had his drugs tampered with and you sat there in front of him and watched him die. That makes you a killer, Blaine! I knew you had something to do with Azimio and Karofsky, but I let it go because they were going to live and the thought of somebody going that far to avenge me was exhilarating. Now I feel ashamed. But this? To kill someone? I can’t just let that pass, Blaine. I can’t ignore it and pretend like it didn’t happen. And now you have some other gang or whatever coming after you; and through you, me. I now get to fear for my life,” Kurt said, his voice full of disgust and shock.

“You don’t have to worry, Kurt, I’m making sure you are safe,” Blaine tried to tell him.

“What, by surrounding us with trained killers? Huh? Is that your answer to everything? And if these people figure out you killed Sebastian, what then? Do you have the entire Smythe family killed? What happens if I make you mad? What happens if something were to break us up? Would you have me killed because I know all of this now?” Kurt ranted.

“Kurt, god, no, how can you even say that?” Blaine cried, standing and reaching out to him.

Kurt backed away. “How can I say that? How can you so blithely sit there and tell me you had a man killed? Yeah, I’ll admit when I found out Sebastian was dead, I was glad, relieved that another of my bullies couldn’t get me again. But would I have killed him? No. I would have called the police, made a statement and let the justice system handle it. Did you ever think of that, Blaine?”

Blaine sighed. “All I knew, all I could think of, was that he deserved to die. That he deserved the worst punishment imaginable for what he did to you. I held your lifeless body in my hands, Kurt. Don’t you think that would do something to a person?”

“Yeah, I know it would. I do. But it doesn’t give you license to go kill somebody. I can’t believe this. I’ve been sleeping next to a killer all of this time. I don’t even understand how you sleep at night. How do you?” Kurt demanded, feeling nauseous.

“I sleep just fine because I know scum like Sebastian no longer breathes the same air as you,” Blaine said honestly.

“No, you can’t do that. You can’t sit there and put it all on me. You can’t say that you did this for me, Blaine. That’s like you’re blaming me for what happened to them. It’s not true and it’s not right. I didn’t ask you to kill Sebastian. I didn’t ask you to beat up Karofsky and Azimio. You made that decision. You took their lives in your hands,” Kurt said, furious and frightened by the man in front of him. He’d thought he knew Blaine. He had been ready to spend the rest of his life with him.  “I need to get out of here. I can’t be here with you right now.”

Blaine’s stomach dropped. “Are you leaving me?”

“Blaine, you just confessed that you are a murderer! How could you expect that I would stay? Did you expect me to thank you and just go off to bed like nothing happened? You took a life. I cannot be with a killer. I can’t. I thought I knew you, knew the type of person you were, but you are not the person I thought you were. So, yes, I’m leaving,” Kurt said, fighting to hold back the tears.

“Please, Kurt, just give me a chance,” Blaine pled.

“I can’t Blaine. Not right now. I need to be away from you,” Kurt told him, trying not to stare at the distraught look on Blaine’s face.

“I’ll leave then. Please stay here. The alarm system is good and will keep you safe. The apartment is in an anonymous name, so nobody could find you here,” Blaine told him, trying to hold back the emptiness that was threatening to engulf him. He had to make sure Kurt stayed safe.

Kurt stared at the floor for several moments. “Fine. I’m going to the bathroom and I’d appreciate it if you would be gone when I get out.” He stalked to the bathroom and closed the door. Putting his hands on the sink, he stared at his pale reflection. What the hell had just happened? They’d come in the door engaged, happy, excited to start a new chapter of their life. Then Blaine confessed to murder and Kurt had kicked him out. Closing his eyes, he steeled himself against sobbing out loud. He had done the right thing. Hadn’t he? Splashing water on his face, he used the towel that was conveniently there to dry off. Then he sat on the toilet and listened. The living room was silent for a few minutes. Then he heard a dragging sound and the front door closed, beeping again. Blaine was gone. He was alone.

He stayed where he was a few more minutes before walking back into the empty living room. There was a note, envelope, and keychain on the coffee table. He picked up the envelope and peeked inside. There was a huge wad of cash, mostly hundred dollar bills, some fifties. He couldn’t even begin to imagine how much it was. Thousands of dollars. He dropped it back on the table and read the note.

_Kurt,_

_I know you probably hate me right now and I guess I don’t blame you. I can only hope that with some time to think, you can see that everything I did was to protect you and care for you. I love you more than the air I breathe. I would do anything for you. Please use this money to get things you need that were ruined because of me. I will bring more by in a few days. The fridge should be fully stocked, so you don’t have to get groceries right away. The apartment building has a grocery delivery service too, if you’d like. The phone number is near the phone. Don’t worry about any bills or anything, I already have it handled. This money was honestly earned, so please use it. If you need ANYTHING, please call me. I love you so much. Please forgive me. Love, Blaine_

 

Kurt dropped the note by the money and went to the kitchen. Sure enough, the fridge was stocked with foods that Kurt approved of. Blaine knew him well. The cupboards were full of things he and Blaine both enjoyed, the teas Kurt liked, the treats they both indulged in. Blaine had done a great job. Too bad he was a complete stranger. Turning off all of the lights, Kurt went up the stairs to the bedroom where Blaine had turned a small lamp on. It was a lovely room with a king size bed, done in Kurt’s favorite colors of blue and gray. Digging in his luggage, he got out his pajamas and changed. Crawling into the bed, he pulled the comforter over him and laid there. All he could think about was Blaine saying he’d sat there and watched Sebastian die. Picturing the scene was too much for him and suddenly, he had to run to the bathroom, vomiting up what little was in his stomach. He washed his mouth out and brushed his teeth before returning to the bed. He tried to empty his mind in hopes of getting some sleep. But his thoughts continued to swirl. He was still laying there, in the same position when the sun came up. Because it rose on the opposite side of the building, he just watched the sky slowly get brighter until the entire apartment was bathed in light. He looked at the clock and saw it was eight in the morning. He hadn’t slept a wink. Getting up, he took a shower and got dressed for the day. He wore his favorite pair of skinny jeans paired with a Henley and a long sweater. His boots were the final touch to make him feel somewhat normal. Going downstairs, he poked around until he found some coffee and made some, comforted by the familiar smell. When it was done, he added a dollop of creamer to his cup and a spoon of sugar and took it to sit by the windows. He turned the small chair he’d sat in last night and curled his legs under him. The city was beautiful. Watching it come to life before him was soothing. This was normal. This was what always happened. Every day these people went to their cars and the cabs and went places, went to work or school or shopping. These people didn’t plan the beatings of people, or the murder of others. Where was the man he loved? Who was he? Was it even Blaine he’d fallen in love with? Or was it some fake persona Blaine had created? He felt like he couldn’t trust anything anymore. Two cups of coffee later and he was unpacking his suitcase, carefully hanging his clothes in the closet. He put his bathroom products in the bathroom, taking up two full shelves. He took care in what he was doing, making sure the labels were all facing the same direction and the towel was hung just so. Kurt knew what was going on, though. He was going to crack soon. The tears would start and it wouldn’t stop for who knew how long. But until then, he would be productive and get things done. Reading about the security system at the kitchen counter, he set the alarm and left, his messenger back in place around his shoulders. Inside it was the envelope of money from Blaine. He was angry, but he was also sensible. He did need to replace some of his books for school, and some of his clothes.

The first stop was the college where he put in his change of address and purchased new books. He stopped by Jason and Colton’s room, but they weren’t there. Sighing, he left and took a cab to the nearest department store. Once there, Kurt replaced some of the scarves and gloves that had been ruined. He didn’t usually shop at chain stores, but he wasn’t in the mood to do any fun shopping. Stopping at the book section, he picked out a couple that looked interesting and a puzzle book. He had a feeling he was going to need something to distract him.

After shopping, he took a walk, not caring that the bags were heavy and he was tired. The air was cold and invigorating. Or at least it would have been if he wasn’t so distracted. He had no idea how far he walked, but he finally reached Central Park. He’d been here once since he’d started at Dalton and he found it just as fascinating as he had the first time. Finding a bench, he sat and just watched the people go by. Each of the people who walked by had a story to tell, most probably sadder or more troubling than his. His might win for shock value but that was about it. That woman with the limp and the troubled eyes, what was her story? Had she been abused? Was she going to limp forever? Did someone she love do this to her? Was that person now someone she wouldn’t recognize? That man over there, sleeping on the bench. What put him there? Had he trusted someone and been betrayed? Or was it mere circumstance that put him on that bench at this time. Kurt wondered what people thought when they saw him. It was certainly different than it was back in Lima. There he’d been stared at, laughed at, mocked, and told to try and fit in more. Here, he was just one of thousands. He didn’t stick out anymore than anyone else. He loved that about this place. But if someone looked at him now, would they see the sadness lurking behind his eyes? Would they be able to tell that the person he loved had turned into a complete stranger? Or would they merely think he’d had a bad day? He spent another hour or so just watching people walk by, telling himself stories about what their lives must be like.

Returning to the apartment some time later, he put away his purchases. It lacked the usual thrill he felt in finding new things. He was back in the chair in front of the window with another cup of coffee when it hit him. The light from the window glinted off the shiny ring he still wore on his left hand. Holding up the hand, looking at the exquisite detail of the markings and diamonds, he knew Blaine had put a lot of thought into the ring. And it broke his heart. How could this person have two such opposite sides? Which was the real Blaine? The stereo that he’d been listening to since he got home serenaded him as he began to cry softly.

 

_I let it fall, my heart,_

_And as it fell you rose to claim it_

_It was dark and I was over_

_Until you kissed my lips and you saved me_

_My hands, they're strong_

_But my knees were far too weak,_

_To stand in your arms_

_Without falling to your feet_

Kurt found himself singing along, tears pouring down his face. He put all his power, all his feeling into the words, singing at the top of his lungs. He didn’t care if he disturbed his neighbors. Singing was therapy, he’d always known that. So he sang his hurt out, he sang his heart out.

_But there's a side to you_

_That I never knew, never knew._

_All the things you'd say_

_They were never true, never true,_

_And the games you play_

_You would always win, always win._

_But I set fire to the rain,_

_Watched it pour as I touched your face,_

_Well, it burned while I cried_

_'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!_

_When I lay with you_

_I could stay there_

_Close my eyes_

_Feel you here forever_

_You and me together_

_Nothing is better_

Nothing was better than he and Blaine together. He’d thought so, at least. Now he didn’t know. But he knew he missed Blaine already. Missed him so badly, he ached inside as if he’d lost part of himself.

_'Cause there's a side to you_

_That I never knew, never knew,_

_All the things you'd say,_

_They were never true, never true,_

_And the games you play_

_You would always win, always win._

_But I set fire to the rain,_

_Watched it pour as I touched your face,_

_Well, it burned while I cried_

_'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name!_

_I set fire to the rain_

_And I threw us into the flames_

_Where it felt something die_

_'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time!_

_Sometimes I wake up by the door,_

_That heart you caught must be waiting for you_

_Even now when we're already over_

_I can't help myself from looking for you._

_I set fire to the rain,_

_Watched it pour as I touched your face,_

_Well, it burned while I cried_

_'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name_

_I set fire to the rain,_

_And I threw us into the flames_

_Where it felt something die_

_'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time, ohhhh!_

_Oh noooo, let it burn, oh_

_Let it burn, let it burn_

 

Kurt let the notes soar around him as he sang. And the pain inside him was like a fire, consuming him whole. Surrounding himself with loneliness and longing for the person he loved more than anything. But it wasn’t meant to be. He didn’t know that person anymore.

He drank cup after cup of coffee and watched the city pass by his window. The sun set eventually, and Kurt was still sitting there, singing song after song, sipping his coffee. Sometimes the sobs caught him so hard, he had to put his cup down and bend over, feeling as if his insides were ripping out. Other times, he simply wept, grieving for the future he’d been so excited about.

The next morning found him still sitting there, aching after not moving throughout the night unless he had to use the bathroom or make more coffee. The tears had slowed some time before the sun rose. Now he just sat there and stared. He felt empty.

Sometime later, he jumped when he heard the doorbell chime. His heart pounding from being shaken from his reverie, he went to the door and peered through the peep hole. Opening the door, he smiled wanly at Jason and Colton before backing away so they could come inside.

“Hey Kurt, wow, look at this place,” Jason said, looking around.

Kurt shut the door and turned to them. “Yeah, it’s pretty incredible,” he said and was surprised to find his voice raspy and quiet. It must have been from singing for so many hours.

“Kurt, are you okay?” Colton asked, looking at him closely. Pale didn’t even begin to describe how he looked. Deep shadows were growing under his eyes and his hands were shaking.

“Okay? What is okay? How can I ever be okay again?” Kurt mused, not really seeing them.

Jason came and took him by the shoulders. “Kurt, look at me,” he demanded. “When is the last time you slept?”

Kurt closed his eyes for a moment, truly trying to think, though his brain felt like a mass of cotton. “Um, California, I think.”

“Kurt, that was nearly three days ago!” Colton cried. “Sweetie, you need to sleep.”

“I can’t. I cry too much. The bed is too empty,” he mumbled.

Jason looked at Colton who shrugged. Blaine had told them that he and Kurt had split up for a while. He’d asked them to come by and check on him, make sure he had what he needed. Jason could see that all Kurt needed right now was to sleep.

“Come on, buddy, let’s get you to bed,” Jason said, steering him upstairs, nodding his head to Colton to indicate he should come along.

The two men helped Kurt undress and put his pajamas on. Then all three of them crawled onto the bed, Kurt between them. Colton and Jason wrapped their arms around Kurt who began crying at the close contact. They just laid there, letting him cry. Slowly the sobs turned to whimpering then to hiccups. Finally, they heard Kurt’s breathing even out, his body still. When they figured he was in a deep sleep, first Colton rolled off the bed, then Jason when Kurt didn’t stir. They surround him with pillows to be a makeshift bed partner. Then they silently went downstairs and cleaned up the coffee maker and cup that Kurt had used. Sitting by the large window, they looked at each other.

“He is a mess,” Colton said quietly.

“I wonder if we need to call Juliet,” Jason mused.

“Maybe we should just suggest it to Kurt. He doesn’t have a problem talking to her anymore. He’d probably be willing to,” Colton replied. “I feel so bad for him.”

“I know. Engaged for a day and then splitting up. At least he gets this place,” Jason said, waving his hand.

“Where is Blaine staying? I figured he’d be at Wes’s place, but he wasn’t there.”

“He’s at a hotel. He gave me the number. I guess he didn’t want to stay on campus after what happened to their dorm room,” Jason said.

“Do you think they’ll get back together?” Colton asked. He was unsure what he wanted for his friends, but all he knew was Kurt was hurting in a bad way and he wanted to help.

“I don’t know, to be honest. It sounded pretty serious. Kurt doesn’t seem the type of person to break up over something small. I hope they do though. They both seem stronger and better when they are with each other,” Jason told him.

“Agreed. I wonder if there is anything we can do to, you know, help them along,” Colton said with a sparkle in his blue eyes.

“You’re adorable when you are scheming,” Jason said with a grin. He leaned over and kissed him softly, dragging his tongue along his lower lip.

“Mm, you need to stop,” Colton said, as his body immediately reacted. “We’ll think of something, won’t we?”

Jason stood and stretched. “We can try. But I have a feeling this is going to have to work itself out.”

They checked in on Kurt and decided it was safe to leave and let him sleep as long as he needed. As they locked the door and left, their hands reached for each other. After seeing Kurt’s brokenness, it brought a desperation to their own love. There was a need to prove to each other that they wouldn’t ever have to experience that kind of hurt. They returned to their dorm and made slow, passionate love, whispering promises to stay together forever.

 

. . . . .

**“Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele**


	23. Chapter 23

 “I’m sorry, Mr. Anderson, Mr. Hummel is not accepting any visitors right now. Can I leave another message for you?” the receptionist asked.

“No, thanks. Did he get the envelope I left for him?”

The woman assured him that Kurt had picked it up the previous evening. Blaine nodded abruptly and walked out of the building.

Kurt hadn’t been taking any of his calls or letting him up to visit. A short time ago, he would have forced his way up there and insisted on being let in. Now, though, he knew he was the one who fucked up. He loved Kurt too much to try and force a reconciliation on him. But, damn, this hurt. It hurt not waking up to Kurt’s soft face and rumpled hair. It ached when he couldn’t wrap himself around Kurt’s body at night. It had been almost a week since they’d been back. The longest week of his pathetic life. School started back tomorrow. He’d see Kurt today, though, at Warbler practice. At least he hoped he did. Just being able to lay eyes on him would ease something in him. This ache in his heart was overwhelming and he found himself rubbing at his chest often throughout the days and nights. The first two days after the break up, he’d been completely useless to the world. He’d curled up in the lumpy bed at the hotel and sobbed, crying for Kurt, begging the air to bring Kurt back to him. He’d cursed himself for being impulsive and stupid. Wes had brought him food and he’d managed a bite or two before he’d begun crying again, surprising the stoic Warbler. Talk about awkward. The second day, though, Colton and Jason had stopped by. They’d gone to see Kurt as he’d asked them to. It felt like a knife in his stomach when they said he hadn’t slept in nearly three days. Blaine had at least been able to sleep, not well, but he had. To know he was making his love physically suffer made the tears start up again. Pride be damned, he didn’t care who saw him cry at this point. Jason and Colton had sat on either side of him and rubbed his back sympathetically.

“He still loves you,” Colton said quietly.

“How do you know?” Blaine asked. “He hates me and he has every right to.”

“Nah, he still loves you,” Jason disagrees. “He wouldn’t be hurting so bad if he didn’t love you.”

“You know what you need to do,” Colton said.

“What?” Blaine said, raising his head and looking at Colton, his golden eyes red and surrounded by spiky black lashes.

“You need to win him back,” Colton said simply. “Remind him why he fell in love with you in the first place.

“But he’s so mad at me,” Blaine started.

“I know he’s mad at you. So do something to work toward fixing whatever it was you did. But meanwhile, woo the shit out of him, so you can show him you’ve changed,” Colton told him.

“Have you thought about singing to him?” Jason asked.

“Yeah,” Blaine said with a watery smile. “I already have one planned for today. What if he walks out and won’t listen?”

“Leave that to us,” Colton said, grinning.

“Yeah, we’ll make sure he sticks around for the whole show,” Jason agreed. “I’m on the lighting team now, so I’ll be there for the rehearsals.”

“Why do you guys want to help me?” Blaine asked, admittedly feeling less miserable.

“You guys belong together,” Jason shrugged. Colton nodded.

“Thanks guys,” Blaine said and surprised them by hugging them before they left.

. . . . .

“Kurt,” Jason called, waving to the pale man as he came into the auditorium. Kurt looked at him gratefully and came to sit down between him and Colton. He’d made sure he was barely on time so he didn’t have to get sucked into any uncomfortable conversations with people. He didn’t know how many people knew he and Blaine were broken up, but he didn’t feel like dealing with questions and curious looks.

“Welcome back everybody,” Mr. Schue said. “We had a great time at the Expo but now it’s time to buckle down. We have our first competition in a few weeks, so we need to start nailing down songs, solos, and choreography. Ideas are always welcome, so the floor will be open.”

“Mr. Schue, I have a song idea,” Blaine said, standing.

Mr. Schue held out his hand. “That’s great and we’ll get to that in a moment. First, we have a potential new member. Everyone say hello to Sam Evans,” he said, motioning to a young man who came up to stand next to him. He was of average height with light blond hair that fell across his forehead. He had bright green eyes that stood out against his slightly tanned skin. He had a wide, full lipped mouth that was pulled up into a shy smile. Kurt thought he was staring at him and looked around to see who was sitting near them. But turning back, he saw those green eyes looking at him, his smile growing from shy to flirty.

“Hi everyone. I’m, uh, Sam. I’m from Kentucky. I’ve been at Dalton since the first of the year, but didn’t hear about the Warbler’s until recently. I, uh, love to sing and hope you guys will consider me for a member,” he said in a pleasant, slightly accented voice.

Everyone clapped lightly. Blaine didn’t clap. He’d been watching the blond staring at someone and turned to see Kurt looking surprised. New guy had his eyes on Kurt and the blush on Kurt’s face showed he realized what was going on.

“Do you have an audition song picked out,” Mr. Schue asked.

“Yeah. I’d planned one, but now,” Sam said, staring pointedly at Kurt. “I think I’ll sing a different song. It’s an Elton John classic.”

He went up to the stage and grabbed a guitar, strumming it experimentally. Satisfied, he began the opening notes of the song.

Blaine seethed inside and prayed the kid had no talent whatsoever. He groaned mentally as the kid began singing, his voice a rich baritone. Shit.

 

_Blue eyes_

_Baby's got blue eyes_

_Like a deep blue sea_

_On a blue, blue day_

_Blue eyes_

_Baby's got blue eyes_

_When the morning comes_

_I'll be far away_

_And I say_

Since Kurt was sitting in the center, it was easy to tell who Sam was singing to. Kurt’s face was bright red and he got some friendly jabs from the guys sitting around him. Kurt looked to where Blaine was sitting and saw his jaw clenched tightly, his hands in fists. Suddenly, he feared for the new kid. Hopefully, Blaine wouldn’t do anything rash.

_Blue eyes_

_Holding back the tears_

_Holding back the pain_

_Baby's got blue eyes_

_And she's alone again_

_Blue eyes_

_Baby's got blue eyes_

_Like a clear blue sky_

_Watching over me_

_Blue eyes_

_I love blue eyes_

_When I'm by her side_

_Where I long to be_

_I will see_

_Blue eyes laughing in the sun_

_Laughing in the rain_

_Baby's got blue eyes_

_And I am home, and I am home again_

 

Sam stood as he finished the song, winking at Kurt as he put the guitar away. The room filled with applause.

Mr. Schue came up the steps and clapped Sam on the back. “Do we even need to put it to a vote? All those in favor of Sam joining us, a hand up please?”

Every hand rose except Blaine’s. Colton and Jason looked at each other in alarm. They’d caught the looks and the winks and Blaine’s reaction. This wasn’t part of their plan.

“Welcome to the Warbler’s, Sam. Why don’t you take a seat. Blaine, you said you had a song?”

“Yeah,” Blaine said and leapt onto the stage in one lithe jump. He handed the band some music and after talking through some of it with them, he went to the microphone.

Kurt made to stand up, but paused at the hand on his arm.

“Just listen, Kurt,” Colton said softly.

Kurt sat back down with a huff and looked up at Blaine. Kurt had watched him jump on stage. Blaine knew he had a thing for his acrobatics and how he enjoyed jumping on furniture. Now the song. He didn’t want to look at him as he sang, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from Blaine’s hypnotic gaze.

 

_Just one more moment, that's all that's needed._

_Like wounded soldiers in need of healing._

_Time to be honest, this time I'm pleading_

_Please don't dwell on it, cause I didn't mean it._

_I can’t believe I said I'd lay our love on the ground_

_But it doesn't matter cause I've made it up forgive me now_

_Every day I spend away my soul's inside out_

_Gotta be some way that I can make it up to you now, somehow._

_By now you'd know that I'd come for you_

_No one but you, yes I'd come for you_

_But only if you told me to_

_And I'd fight for you_

_I'd lie, it's true_

_Give my life for you_

_You know I'd always come for you._

Kurt couldn’t stop the tears from escaping his eyes. It was all true. Blaine had fought for him, lied for him, and he knew Blaine would easily give his life for him. But was it enough to look past what he’d done?

_I was blindfolded, but now I'm seeing_

_My mind was closing, now I'm believing_

_I finally know just what it means to let someone in_

_To see the side of me that no one does or ever will_

_So if you're ever lost and find yourself all alone_

_I'd search forever just to bring you home,_

_Here and now this I vow._

_By now you'd know that I'd come for you_

_No one but you, yes I'd come for you_

_But only if you told me to_

_And I'd fight for you_

_I'd lie, it's true_

_Give my life for you_

_You know I'd always come for you_

_You know I'd always come for you._

Blaine’s golden eyes turned fierce as he looked around the room, watching Sam as he once again stared at Kurt. He growled through the lines before turning his gaze back to Kurt.

_No matter what gets in my way_

_As long as there's still life in me_

_No matter what, remember you know I'll always come for you._

_Yes I'd come for you, no one but you,_

_Yes I'd come for you_

_But only if you told me to._

_And I'd fight for you_

_I'd lie, it's true_

_Give my life for you_

_You know I'd always come for you._

_No matter what gets in my way_

_As long as there's still life in me_

_No matter what, remember you know I'll always come for you_

_I'd crawl across this world for you_

_Do anything you want me to_

_No matter what, remember you know I'll always come for you_

_You know I'll always come for you._

 

Blaine finished the song and hopped off the stage, returning to his seat. He didn’t turn to look at Kurt, but silently hoped he’d heard the message of the song. Now he went back to figuring out what he was going to do to keep Sam away from Kurt. There was no doubting the blonde’s intentions.

After practice, he came up next to the kid as he accepted congratulations and welcomes from the other members.

When it was just the two of them, he whispered threateningly in his ear. “He’s mine. Stay the hell away from him.”

Sam looked at him, his eyebrow up. “Didn’t look like he’s yours. Looked like he was sitting about as far away from you as he could.”

Aware Kurt was still in the room and no doubt watching his actions, Blaine took a deep breath. “We’re going through a rough patch. But have no doubt, he is mine. Is that clear?”

Sam snorted and grinned. “There’s no ring on his finger. As far as I’m concerned, that makes him free and clear.”

How did he know about the ring? Wait, no ring? Blaine turned to see Kurt walking out of the room. At the last moment, he waved to someone and there it was, his left hand, minus one ring. He felt like he’d been kicked in the stomach. Kurt had taken his ring off? Was it really over? While he was distracted by his heart shattering into a million pieces, Sam had grabbed his bag and run out the door.

Blaine was still standing there several minutes later when Jason walked up to him.

“You okay, man?”

“He took the ring off,” Blaine mumbled, his tone shocked.

“I think it’s cuz he’s confused right now. Don’t worry about it. I know he still loves you. And don’t worry about that Sam kid. I’ll make sure he stays away from your boy,” Jason said, patting Blaine on the shoulder.

Blaine looked up at him gratefully. “You’re a good friend, Jason.”

Jason looked surprised. “Thanks. You are too. I’m glad we’ve had the chance to get to know each other.”

“Me too. Is there any chance you are in the mood for a cup of coffee,” Blaine asked, not quite ready to head back to the lonely hotel.

“Sounds good,” he said.

It wasn’t such a good idea after all. They walked into the café and immediately saw a group of Warbler’s including Kurt and Sam sitting in the corner, laughing at some joke. Blaine didn’t miss that Sam was sitting next to Kurt, leaning toward him so their shoulders almost brushed.

“I, uh, I gotta go,” Blaine said in a rush. He was well aware of his temper and knew if he didn’t leave right now, he’d be putting the blonde’s head through the window. His fists tightened and he knew he was about to lose it. Turning he ran out the door, not caring that it banged loudly against the opposite wall.

Kurt turned and saw the door closing. He wondered what was up, but hadn’t seen whatever had happened. He saw Jason standing there and smiled, waving him over. Jason held up a finger and got in line to make his order.

“You’re beautiful,” Sam said, turning to him, smiling.

“Um, thanks,” Kurt said, blushing.

“I love your eyes. They remind me of the ocean, all blues and grays and greens. That song I sang was for you, you know,” Sam grinned, his green eyes twinkling.

“You don’t even know me,” Kurt said, disbelieving.

“Not yet. But I know what I like. You are gorgeous and I like that,” he replied with a wink.

Kurt colored even more. He was used to Blaine complimenting him, but not other people. Before Blaine he’d been invisible to everyone except bullies. This was weird. And uncomfortable.

He was about to say something when he saw Jason come over and stand behind Sam. “Move over,” Jason said.

“Dude, there’s a chair right there,” Sam retorted.

Jason used every last one of his inches to loom over Sam threateningly. “But I want to sit _here_. Move over.”

“Jesus. Fine,” Sam muttered and moved to the empty chair.

Jason sat down and threw his arm around Kurt. “Hey Kurt, how are you?”

“I’m okay. Could you be anymore caveman?” Kurt chuckled.

“Well, I think this guy needs to know you aren’t available,” Jason said loudly.

Kurt grimaced. “Jason, please, not now.” He couldn’t handle thinking about Blaine. He was still aching from the song he’d sung. It was taking all of his strength to not hunt him down and beg to be taken back.

“Despite you two not getting along right now, you are still taken,” Jason continued in a volume meant to carry. “Or are you saying you are available to date?” Jason asked quietly, a dare in his tone.

“No, of course I don’t want to date,” Kurt said. “I love Blaine.”

Jason turned to face Sam. “Hear that?”

“Yeah, but he’s not with Blaine right now, is he? Maybe Blaine could live with some competition. Make him realize he shouldn’t be so eager to throw away someone so wonderful,” Sam said. He stood and winked at Kurt before making his way to the door. “See you tomorrow, Kurt.”

Kurt let his head fall on the table. “I do not need this,” he moaned.

“Don’t worry, Kurt. We’ll keep the evil blonde man away from you,” Jason reassured him, rubbing his back.

“He’s not evil. He’s nice,” Kurt said from the table. “If this was any other circumstance, I might try to be his friend. Why does he have to be interested in me?”

“Because you’re irresistible,” Jason teased.

“You resisted me,” Kurt said, sitting up with a smile.

“That’s because I only go for short, redheads,” Jason said, wiggling his eyebrows.

. . . . .

Blaine answered the call, his stomach twisting. “What happened?”

“Your dad is in the hospital. He was followed and beaten up pretty bad. Some broken ribs, nose, bruises everywhere. He’ll be fine. But it was clearly a message. You might want to take some extra precautions,” the familiar voice said.

“Shit. Is my mom okay?” Blaine closed his eyes. His dad was bad enough, but if his mom…

“Yeah. We’re pretty close to the mole, we have it narrowed down. Once that is taken care of, we should be in the clear,” he said. “We did have to explain things to your father. He took the news pretty well, considering.”

Blaine was relieved. He knew his father was tough enough to not only understand why this was happening, but to live through an attack.

“Alright. Make sure my guest has a tail at all times. Keep me updated.”

“Will do, boss man,” he said and hung up.

. . . . .

Kurt was in the café again, having coffee when he heard the chair next to him pull out.

“Hey Kurt,” Sam said cheerfully.

Kurt closed his eyes. “It’s really not a good time, Sam.”

“Aw, come on. I won’t bite. I want to be friends. I promise, no hitting on you,” Sam said with a grin.

Kurt glanced at him and saw the sincere light in his eyes. “Fine. The first compliment I hear, you’re out the door,” he said, smiling.

“Done,” Sam said, holding his hand up. “What are you studying?”

“Art History. Utterly boring right now, but usually my favorite topic,” Kurt said.

“I personally can’t stand any part of history, so I sympathize. What’s your major?” Sam asked, sipping his coffee.

“Fashion Design and Merchandising. What about you?” Kurt asked, finding he was truly curious.

“Architecture. It’s funny. You want to design clothes and I want to design buildings,” Sam grinned.

“That is funny. Maybe someday you’ll design the building where I design my clothes,” Kurt said, returning the smile.

They talked amicably for the next two hours. Kurt was surprised at how much they had in common. Sam had worked as a mechanic for a few years growing up, like Kurt had. They shared an interest in classic cars and their taste in music was similar. Sam enjoyed Broadway classics as much as Kurt did and they spent a while debating different actors in different Broadway roles. Kurt was surprised to find himself having a truly good time. It was the first time he’d truly relaxed since he’d gotten back from California.

They were gathering up their books and putting coats on when Sam suddenly grinned at him, a wicked sparkle in his eyes.

“Since I’m leaving anyway,” he began and started walking toward the door. “You have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen. And your lips… well, I don’t have time to go on about those right now. Just know I’ll be thinking about them until we see each other again.” With that, he winked and slipped out the door.

Kurt couldn’t help but laugh. Sam really was a great guy and had the potential to be a good friend. But that’s where the potential ended. There was no spark there. There was no spark in Kurt’s life at all, unless it had to do with Blaine. Blaine. God, he missed him. He was throwing himself into anything and everything he could to avoid thinking about him. But going back to the apartment each night only served to make him miss him even more.

. . . . .

“I thought you were going to keep him away from Kurt?” Blaine demanded, glaring at Jason. “They’ve had coffee every single day for the last week!”

Jason held his hands up. “Hey, man, I’m doing my best. They’ve become friends and it seems to be doing Kurt some good. I’ve been keeping an ear and eye out and honestly, all they do is talk. I never hear Sam flirt or do anything that deserves a beat down.”  
Blaine looked at him doubtfully. “How could he be around Kurt and not flirt with him. I’m not stupid.”

Jason raised an eyebrow.

Rubbing his face with a groan. “Fine, I’m stupid. I just miss him. And to know he’s been spending time with someone else every day. It’s killing me.”

“I know, but don’t give up hope. Maybe it’s time for another song?” Jason asked.

“Probably. I’ve been throwing around some ideas,” Blaine muttered. “I don’t know. Could a song be enough to bring two people back together?”

“There’s only one way to find out,” Jason suggested.

. . . . .

Kurt and Sam had started sitting next to each other during Warbler rehearsal. The group was still trying to nail down songs for the competition and people were up singing different songs to see if there was any interest.

Kurt stiffened when Blaine took the stage. Sam looked at him, but didn’t say anything. Blaine picked up his guitar and slung it around his shoulders. He began strumming, looking at Kurt with a twinkle in his eyes. He knew it drove Kurt wild when he got to watch him play. Kurt quickly crossed his legs, refusing to think of how long it had been since they’d been together.

 

_I hate where I’m at_

_Acting crazy like that_

_I know that I’ve been wrong_

_It’s something I’ve been working on_

_And I don’t know what to do_

_It’s changing me it's killing you_

_I’d tear out my insides if I could_

_But I don’t know if it’d do me good_

_I’m sorry friends I’m sorry lovers_

_To put us all in this mess_

_I know we still got each other_

_But I’m in distress_

_Cause every time that I feel like I’ve figured it out_

_I can’t seem to figure it in_

_It’s got nothing to do with me_

_It’s not even you, you see_

_It’s part of my chemistry_

_It’s this jealousy_

_In absolutely no position_

_To be so needlessly unkind_

_When I’m the one writing this fiction_

_Make it real in my mind_

_It drives me crazy in the morning_

_Who is this monster in the mirror_

_I try to get the steam to fog it out_

_But I just can’t get it clear_

_Oh and I can’t stand what I’m feeling_

_It’s just like poison in my veins_

_I know that I’m speaking_

_But I don’t know what I’m saying_

_Cause every time that I feel like the world just got lighter_

_It seems like my muscles give out_

_It’s got nothing to do with me_

_It’s not even you, you see_

_It’s part of my chemistry_

_It’s this jealousy_

Blaine continued staring at Kurt, smiling and winking. Kurt’s body was reacting to his voice, and those fingers as they played over the guitar strings.

_And I’m hearing your voice_

_Babe, you know it’s your choice_

_Maybe so_

_And I know it’s no use_

_But it’s the only excuse_

_That I know, know,  know_

_Let me go_

_Let me go_

_Oh let me go_

_Oh let me go_

_Now let’s be real I feel just like a child_

_Someone could be taking all my toys_

_So call me dumb, call me wild_

_See that’s the thing with little boys_

Kurt was nodding with a grin at the ‘dumb’ line. Blaine bit his lip to hold off a laugh.

_Oh now I can’t get it out in the shower_

_Or drink it off at the bar_

_This sugar's gone sour_

_And it's gone way too far_

_Cause every time that I feel like I’m riding so high,_

_Feel on top of the world_

_The bitch just keeps telling me no_

Kurt’s eyebrow went up in the air. Blaine waved his hand madly, trying to make sure Kurt know it was just another line to the song. They both grinned.

_It's got nothing to do with me_

_It’s not even you, you see_

_It’s part of my chemistry_

_This demon is killing me_

_And oh Christ it’s filling me_

_It’s this jealousy_

_Oh, and I just can’t believe_

_In this jealousy,_

_This jealousy for you_

_Oh this jealousy,_

_This jealousy for you_

 

Blaine strummed the guitar quickly and ended the song to applause. He looked at Kurt with a smile as he clapped for Blaine. Kurt grinned back, shaking his head. Sam looked sideways at Kurt, seeing the love and amusement shining on his face. Damn, looked like Kurt really was wild over this guy, Sam thought. Oh well, he could still be a friend. And maybe flirting would help the idiot on the stage to get his head out of his ass.

 

. . . . .

**Songs: “Blue Eyes” by Elton John; “I’d Come For You” by Nickelback; and “Jealousy” by Darren Criss.**


	24. Chapter 24

“Non-fat mocha,” Sam said, sitting the cup in front of Kurt.

Kurt looked up, surprised. “You know my coffee order?”

Sam chuckled. “Of course, dummy. Haven’t we been doing this for two weeks now?”

“Oh. Yeah, I guess we have. I’m embarrassed to admit that I don’t know your order,” Kurt admitted, blushing a bit.

“Probably because I never get the same drink. I’m also usually the one ordering since you always have your nose buried in these books,” Sam said, bumping the ever present Art History book.

“Well, mid-terms are coming up and I’m kind of freaking out. Aren’t you?” Kurt asked, sipping the coffee and sighing as the heat hit his stomach.

“Not really. I mean I’ve studied, but you can only do so much, right?” he said casually.

“I guess,” Kurt repeated. “I can’t just stop, though. I feel like I have to try and shove as much information into my brain as possible in the hopes I’ll remember it for the exams.”

“Well, how about you use me as an excuse to take a break. That way you can let your brain breathe, so it doesn’t drown in dates and names,” Sam teased.

Kurt slammed his book shut with a smile. “I can’t argue with that. So, how are things?”

“Life is pretty good. I’m looking forward to the end of mid-terms, obviously. There’s a great party this Friday to celebrate the end of exams,” he replied.

“Which dorm?” Kurt asked, remembering he didn’t have such great luck at parties, or after parties.

“The Kappa frat, actually. There are only a couple frats around and these guys tend to throw parties all the time,” Sam said, biting into a muffin.

“Ah, the Kappa’s. Also known as the dorm that brought us the 'Somebody-Sneezed Party,' and the 'Day that Ends in Y Party.' They tend to party pretty hard, don’t they?” Kurt asked. He’d heard plenty about that particular frat and after his experience, he was nervous to go to any parties.

“Yeah, but isn’t that the point?” Sam asked, grinning.

Kurt giggled lightly and reached over to brush the muffin crumbs from Sam’s chin. “You’re a messy eater. And yeah, I guess hard partying is the point. I just haven’t had the best of luck at these things.”

Sam’s green eyes darkened at Kurt’s touch. He’d been trying to concentrate on just being a friend and had even let up on the majority of his flirting. But he couldn’t deny that he was still attracted to Kurt. That small, innocent touch had sent shivers through his body, like an electric shock. Could there be something there for Kurt as well?

“What happened at the parties you’ve been to?” Sam asked, choosing to not respond to the touch.

“We’re friends right?” Kurt asked, his voice hesitant.

Sam tilted his head. “Yeah, we are. Why?”

“Well, if I tell you something, I need to know it won’t go any further than this table,” Kurt said quietly, staring at his coffee cup.

Sam reached over and laid his hand gently on Kurt’s, ignoring the instant reaction in his body. “Kurt, you can trust me. Nothing you say will go any further than me, even if you confessed to a murder,” he said with a smile.

Kurt just about spit out his coffee at that last comment. Sam had no way of knowing, of course, but it was too ironic. “Well, at the first party I went to, I was attacked. The second party I went to, I was attacked after I left. So, I’m not too inclined to go to any social gatherings,” Kurt admitted.

Sam sat there, shocked. “Oh my god, Kurt, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?”

Kurt waved his words away. “I am now. It took a while, but I’m good now.”

“Who did this to you? I mean, did you call the cops?” Sam felt the need for revenge. Who would dare attack this beautiful man?

“Um. Actually, it was the same guy both times. He, uh, ended up OD’ing on heroin a while back,” Kurt replied.

“Well, I can’t say I’m sorry to hear that,” Sam said, his words slightly twanging from his southern accent. Kurt noticed the accent came out more when he was excited or upset about something. It was odd, knowing these personal things about someone. Especially because Kurt could tell Sam still found him attractive.

“What if we went as a group?” Sam offered. “We could get Colton, Jason, Wes, David, Puck, all those guys. We could go together.” What he really wanted was to ask Kurt to be his date, but he knew Kurt would say no. Blaine was still very much in the picture, even if they were split up right now.

Kurt sat and thought for a moment. He couldn’t let the fear of what happened color his life forever. Sebastian had been the perpetrator both times and he was gone. A feeling of gratitude swept through him. That had been happening a lot lately. Knowing that the person who wanted to hurt him could never come back; it comforted him. Blaine had removed something that would have haunted him the rest of his life. He’d taken away someone who could hurt him again. Was that his motivation, like he’d said? Could Kurt forgive that? But what if it happened again? Shaking his head, he realized he still hadn’t answered Sam.

“You know what? Sure. As long as it’s that big of a group, I’ll give it a shot,” Kurt said, trying to be brave.

“Good for you,” Sam said, patting his hand again. Dammit, he needed to stop touching him or he was going to get a hard-on. Just being near this unearthly creature drove him wild. He would never admit to anyone that he thought about Kurt when he was naked in the shower. Never admit that he thought about those beautiful blue-green eyes as he stroked himself. Never admit that it was Kurt’s name he moaned as he came. Focus, you pervert, he chastised himself. Focus.

“Okay, cool. I’ll talk to the guys and we’ll plan it,” Sam said, excited at the prospect of perhaps getting a dance with Kurt.

“Excellent,” Kurt said, trying to feel some sort of excitement. He wished Blaine would go. He’d truly feel safe if Blaine were there, issues or not.

“Can I ask you another question since we’re being open?” Sam asked.

“Sure, I guess,” Kurt replied, looking at him curiously.

“What happened with you and Blaine? From what I’ve heard, you two were engaged and the next day you were broken up,” Sam said gently. Kurt seemed the completely loyal type, not one to walk away from someone for no good reason.

“Well, I can’t get into the actual details. Let’s just say he lied to me about some things, some very serious things and I need time to think about all of it,” Kurt said, playing with the sleeve from his coffee cup.

“I’m sorry,” Sam said quietly. The anguish on Kurt’s face was so raw, it hurt just to look at him. “So what exams do you have tomorrow?” he asked, hoping to quickly change the subject.

Kurt smiled at him gratefully and began telling him about the mid-terms he was facing in the upcoming days. Sam really was a good guy, he thought. He was glad to have him.

. . . . .

“We did it! Can you believe it’s done? Over? Kaput?” Colton cheered, jumping up and down between Kurt and Jason.

“I know, I’m so relieved,” Kurt said with a smile.

“Mid-terms are always a bitch,” Jason said, rubbing Colton’s back. “I’m a junior and these damn exams can still make me quiver like a naked baby.”

“Quiver like a naked baby?” Kurt repeated. “What kind of sad, pathetic comparison is that?”

“Shut up, Diva. My brain is empty. I’ll return to my clever repartee on Monday. So. Party tonight. Are we ready?” Jason asked.

“Hell yeah! There’s a beer somewhere with my name on it,” Colton said, his crystal blue eyes sparkling.

“Yeah. Party,” Kurt said, his stomach in knots over the idea.

“Hey. Don’t even worry about a thing,” Jason said, putting his hand on Kurt’s shoulder. “We have a large group going. We all know what happened and someone will be with you at all times.”

“I’m so pathetic,” Kurt mourned. “All of you are having to give up your party time to babysit my dumb ass.”

“You aren’t pathetic and nobody is giving up any party time. We’ll all be there, we’ll all be partying. We’re just doing it together,” Colton pointed out. “No worries.”

“Well,” Jason said hesitantly. “There may be one worry.”

“What’s that?” Kurt asked warily.

“Um. Blaine’s going to be there. I told him you’d be going with us and he insisted on going to, just to be an extra set of eyes for you. He said he wouldn’t bug you or anything. He just worries, Kurt,” Jason told him.

Kurt closed his eyes against the tears that were suddenly threatening to fall. Blaine was still watching out for him. He’d seen him every so often, just observing, never pushing Kurt. He continued to drop off money at the apartment, though Kurt had more than enough money left from the original envelope. If he was honest with himself, he felt safer knowing Blaine would be there tonight.

“That’s fine. Of course. I wouldn’t stop him from going to a party,” Kurt reassured his friends. “So, what kind of party is this? Basic ‘let’s get drunk and run around the streets naked’? Or is it themed in some way?”

“Actually, yeah,” Colton said, his excitement returning. “It’s a mask party. Not costume or anything. Everyone is just going to be wearing masks. Any kind. Creepy, scary, pretty, whatever. I was going to ask you if you wanted to go to the costume shop with me. Jason has some creepy old man mask he’s going to wear. I want something flashier.”

If it had to do with shopping, Kurt was all for it. “Absolutely. Let’s go!”

. . . . .

Four hours later, Kurt was standing in front of the mirror in Jason’s room. It felt strange to be back in the room where he’d tried to kill himself. But it was so different with Colton’s belongings that it wasn’t a bad experience.

“How do I look?” he asked, turning and spinning for his friends. He’d found a perfect mask. It was plain white and was like the Phantom of the Opera mask, only it took up the entire top half of his face. It made him look eerie, but not scary. He’d gone with a plain black Henley, black jeans, and boots. To add a splash of color, he’d slipped a blue scarf through his belt loops.

“You look hot,” Jason said with a wink.

“You really do,” Colton agreed. He’d gone with a Mardi Gras-esque mask with bright feathers and glitter all over it.

“ _You_ really don’t,” Kurt said to Jason. The creepy man mask was just that, creepy. Kurt and Colton had picked up a plain black half mask for him just in case, but he’d turned them down. Colton said he was going to bring it along. Dancing in a full rubber mask was not going to be pleasant once he got hot.

They went downstairs and met the rest of the group that was going. Most of them were Warblers, along with some of their dates. Everyone had a mask on, from silly to scary, to simple and plain. Sam wore a green half mask that had antennae sticking up from it.

“An alien mask? Really?” Kurt commented as they began the walk to the frat house. It was close enough that nobody had to drive, which gave them less to worry about when people wanted to drink. As usual, Kurt would be catching a cab back to the apartment. Alone.

“Why not? It’s green. Doesn’t it bring out the green in my eyes?” Sam said, leaning over and batting his eyelashes.

“Well, if it wasn’t pitch black out here and your face covered in shadows, I might be able to tell. I’ll just take your word for it,” Kurt grinned.

As they walked, Kurt made sure to make small talk with all the party goers. They all knew what he’d been through and had agreed to go together. He was grateful for their small sacrifices, for their obvious caring. He would stick close and make sure he was as small a pain as possible.

They entered the loud frat house, given the normal glow sticks, and offered beers. Kurt took one, but only sipped on it. He didn’t want to get out of control. He couldn’t risk something bad happening. Again.

Colton immediately dragged him out to dance and Kurt danced stiffly next to him.

“Let loose, Kurt, it’s okay, you’re safe,” a warm voice said from behind him.

He turned with a start and saw Sam standing there. For a minute, he’d thought…

“I don’t see you dancing,” he said lightly.

“I wasn’t invited,” Sam returned.

“Oh for crying out loud, just dance with us,” Colton grumbled.

Sam and Kurt laughed and began dancing. Before long Jason, Puck, Wes, David, and a couple girls they’d brought along, joined in. They were a laughing, bumbling circle and Kurt found he was having a truly good time. “Single Ladies” started playing and Kurt groaned. Jason and Colton knew Kurt’s history regarding the song and started chanting for him to do the dance. Warmed by the small bit of alcohol he had, Kurt shrugged and stepped into the middle of the circle and began the familiar steps, swiveling his hips and throwing his head back.

Blaine watched him and felt a strange sense of déja vu. He’d been here before, watching Kurt and his magnetic hips. Only now he wasn’t allowed to touch him. Only now he had to watch that asshole Sam dancing next to him, trying to copy his moves. He had to watch Kurt laugh and slap at the other man playfully. And he had to resist walking over and snapping the man’s neck. Sam had turned out to be a friend for Kurt. He had a guy following Kurt to keep him safe and the guy also reported who he hung out with and Blaine knew they spent time together every day. He was jealous. Horribly, stinking jealous. And there was not a damn thing he could do about it. Checking his phone for messages, he saw there were none, which was a good sign. His father was healing quickly and was at home doing well. Blaine had finally talked to him and told him everything. Like his guy had told him, his father understood. He’d done similar things in the past. It had been the best talk he’d ever had with his dad. It was like since he’d used his father’s men for nefarious reasons, his father finally saw him as his son. As messed up as that was, Blaine was happy to be able to call and talk to both his parent’s whenever he wanted to. And he knew they’d answer the phone instead of always letting it go to voice mail.

Kurt danced, drank, and danced some more. He was having the best time. Watching his friends, he could tell when a couple wanted to dance alone and he’d casually dance over to one of the other people in their group.

Colton was dancing with Sam, so Kurt danced with Jason, who had finally caved and put on the lighter mask. Jason just did the step touch dance, so Kurt just swayed next to him. They were laughing at Sam’s antics when Jason’s smile froze.

“Warning,” he said between clenched teeth.

Kurt stiffened and felt a tap on his shoulder.

He turned around and nearly lost his breath. A hand was being held out to him. “May I have this dance, please?”

Blaine’s eyes were golden against the black of his mask. Like Kurt, he’d dressed in all black. But with his black hair and the mask, he was a stunning picture of sensuality.

Kurt tried to think but couldn’t. “Um, sure.” He put his hand into Blaine’s and sighed as those strong fingers closed around his.

Blaine led them to a more deserted corner, like they had at that first party. The song changed to a slow song, the rhythm hypnotic. Staring deep into each other’s eyes, Kurt stepped into him and wrapped his arms loosely around Blaine’s neck. Blaine put his hands around Kurt’s waist, drawing him in closer. The woman’s started singing and the intense beat pulsed around them.

 

_You make me feel like a sticky pistol_

_Leaning into her stamen._

_You make me feel like Mr. Sunshine himself._

_You make me feel like splendor in the grass where we're rolling_

_Dance with me baby_

_You make me feel like the Amazon's running between my thighs._

_You make me feel love, love, love, love, love…._

_You make me feel love, love, love, love, love…._

_Love, love…_

Blaine couldn’t believe he had his arms wrapped around Kurt again. He felt amazing and with the song and the motion of his hips, Blaine was getting hard fast. Subtly, he slotted a leg between Kurt’s and brought their hips closer together. They began swaying, undulating against one another, breathing heavily. No words were spoken; they let their bodies speak for them.

 

_You make me feel like a candy apple all red and horny_

_You make me feel like I want to be a dumb blonde_

_In a centerfold, the girl next door._

_And I would open the door and I'd be all wet_

_With my tits soaking through this tiny little t-shirt that I'm wearing_

_And you would open the door and tie me up to the bed._

 

_You make me feel love, love, love, love, love…._

_You make me feel love, love, love, love, love…._

_Love, love…_

 

Kurt tucked his head into Blaine’s neck, breathing him in. Dear god, he’d missed his masculine scent. Blaine’s strong arms around him, his body so close, Kurt wanted to cry out at the intense pleasure. As it was, he allowed his hips more motion, swirling and thrusting against Blaine. At the sharp intake of breath, he knew Blaine was feeling the same as him.

 

_Lover, I don't know who I am._

_Am I Barry White - am I Isis?_

_Lover I'm laced with your unconscious,_

_I will be your Desdemona_

_Take your time_

_You make me feel, ohhh_

_You make me feel, ahhh_

_You make me feel, oh, oh, ah, ah, oh, oh..._

The music thumped through the room, mesmerizing them. Blaine slowly slid his hands down until he was cupping Kurt’s ass. Kurt’s breath shuddered against his neck. Kurt let his hands glide up and down Blaine’s wide shoulders. Both of them were re-exploring each other’s bodies, going slow so it didn’t seem as sudden and animalistic as they wanted it to be.

The song ended, but they didn’t seem to notice. Neither wanted to be the first to move away. Another song started, one with a faster beat. But they kept moving against one another, breathing heavily, their bodies trying to make love through their clothes. Kurt was hard as rock and he could feel that Blaine was too.

To complete the feeling of déja vu, Blaine whispered in Kurt’s ear. “Let me make you feel good, baby. No sex. I just want to make you come.”

Kurt didn’t bother thinking. “Yes,” he breathed.

They stopped dancing slowly, somehow not wanting the movements to stop. Finally, Blaine took Kurt’s hand and led him back into the house. Like before, he found an empty room and pulled Kurt inside.

He gently pushed Kurt up against the wall and pulled both of their masks off.

“Please let me kiss you,” Blaine murmured.

Kurt answered by slanting his mouth over Blaine’s. They both cried out as they tasted each other. It felt like it had been an eternity since they’d kissed. Blaine gently ran his tongue over Kurt’s lower lip before slipping inside his mouth. He gave a guttural moan as their tongues connected and writhed against one another. Kurt sucked gently on his tongue, making his cock pulse in his pants. Turning his attention to Blaine’s neck, Kurt began licking and sucking gently on his skin.

Shuddering from the delicious feelings, Blaine pulled him closer. “You want it like that first time, baby? Up against the wall?”

Kurt pulled back and looked at him, his eyes blown almost black with lust. “No. No clothes, on the bed. But no sex,” he breathed.

Blaine could only nod. Within a minute they were nude, looking at each other nervously. Kurt walked to the bed and laid down, holding his hand out to Blaine. Blaine came to him and slowly knelt over his body, before allowing himself to slide down completely against Kurt. Moans filled the room as their hot flesh connected, at once erotic and comforting. Kurt refused to cry or grasp Blaine close to him because he’d missed him. He wanted the orgasm he was so desperately close to. Moving his hips against Blaine, he let his body tell Blaine what he wanted. Blaine licked his hand and stroked himself with it then stroked Kurt, both of them crying out. Once they were both slick, Blaine moved back over Kurt and began thrusting his hips into Kurt’s. Pants and mewls of pleasure filled the air, though they couldn’t tell from who. They imitated what they’d done on the dance floor, twisting, pushing, circling their hips together, letting their cocks rub against each other. Kurt arched up as Blaine pressed down, sliding together. Blaine began thrusting his hips down harder, pushing and gliding until he heard the telltale whimpers come from Kurt’s throat. He leaned down and sucked hard at Kurt’s collar bone, knowing it would drive him over the edge. He was right. Kurt came with a shout, the orgasm going on and on as they moved together. Blaine felt the pulsing of Kurt’s cock and growled as he came, his come mixing with Kurt’s on their stomachs and chests.

They lay there against each other, breathing hard. Silently, Blaine got up and went to the connecting bathroom and brought back a warm washcloth. Lovingly, he cleaned Kurt up before wiping himself clean. He went to put the rag in the bathroom and came back to see Kurt getting dressed. He did the same, wondering if he should say anything. After tasting him for the first time in so long, he just wanted to take him in his arms and never let go. But he’d told himself he’d let Kurt make the moves, so he was stuck.

Kurt dressed quickly, his mind too full to process any thoughts clearly. Once he was fully dressed, mask in place, he looked at Blaine, his eyes sad. He offered him a small smile and left the room. Grabbing a beer, he chugged it down and rejoined Jason and Colton on the dance floor. They didn’t ask where he’d been or if he was okay, they simply welcomed him back, comforting him with hugs and pats on the back.

Throughout the rest of the party, Kurt saw Blaine standing there at the edge of the dance floor, his golden eyes ever watchful.

. . . . .

Later, in his empty apartment, Kurt curled up and cried. He sniffed at himself, trying to see if there was any hint of Blaine left with him. Over and over, he went through the happenings of the night, trying to experience it all over again. The touches, the kisses, the intensity of being held by Blaine again. But try as he might, he couldn’t get the feeling back. He was alone and that was all he felt.

 

. . . . .

 

**“Feelin’ Love” by Paula Cole. (I highly recommend it. The lyrics are odd, but the beat of the song is wonderfully hypnotic and sexy.)**


	25. Chapter 25

Kurt woke up full of questions. He took his time getting ready for the day, trying to straighten out his thoughts. What were the lines between right and wrong? Was it always black and white? Was there ever a gray area? Murder is wrong. But murder in defense or vengeance for someone you love… could that be different? Blaine hadn’t used his own hands to kill Sebastian. Yes, he was undoubtedly responsible. But how far would Kurt go to avenge Blaine were he wronged? The thought of anyone harming Blaine sent a flash of heat and fury through his stomach. He was a pacifist at heart, but would he ever do someone harm that had harmed the man he loved? He could see it happening. There was nothing he wouldn’t do for Blaine. He missed Blaine dreadfully. Especially after last night. He’d been wrapped in Blaine’s arms, safe, loved, and wanted once more. He knew it was his own words and actions that had caused that to stop. But Blaine had lied. He’d kept this huge part of his life from Kurt and he didn’t know if he could forgive that. Idiot, his heart told him, did you ever think Blaine didn’t tell you because he was trying to protect you from that side of his life? Glaring at his reflection in the mirror, he lifted his chin and walked away. Gathering his designs and patterns for his classes, he left the building.

That afternoon at Warbler’s, folks were still trying out various numbers. They had a more narrowed down list and Mr. Schue was after them to settle on something. Blaine and some of the other guys were up trying a group number with Blaine on lead vocals. Kurt had been caught in a conversation with Jason who’d stopped working to watch Colton, but they both went silent as the song began.

 

_It's his hair and his eyes today_

_that just simply take me away_

_and the feeling that I’m falling further in love_

_makes me shiver but in a good way_

_all the times I have sat and stared_

_as he thoughtfully thumbs through his hair_

_and he purses his lips, bats his eyes as he plays,_

_with me sitting there slack-jawed and nothing to say_

_coz I love him with all that I am_

_and my voice shakes along with my hands_

_coz he’s all that I see and he’s all that I need_

_and I'm out of my league once again_

_It's a masterful melody when he calls out my name to me_

_as the world spins around him he laughs, rolls his eyes_

_and I feel like I’m falling but it's no surprise_

_coz I love him with all that I am_

_and my voice shakes along with my hands_

_cause it's frightening to be swimming in this strange sea_

_but I’d rather be here than on land_

_yes he's all that I see and he's all that I need_

_and I’m out of my league once again_

_It's his hair and his eyes today_

_that just simply take me away_

_and the feeling that I’m falling further in love_

_makes me shiver but in a good way_

_all the times I have sat and stared_

_as he thoughtfully thumbs through his hair_

_and he purses his lips, bats his eyes as he plays,_

_with me sitting there slack-jawed and nothing to say_

_coz I love him with all that I am_

_and my voice shakes along with my hands_

_cause it's frightening to be swimming in this strange sea_

_but I’d rather be here than on land_

_yes he's all that I see and he's all that I need_

_and I’m out of my league once again_

 

Kurt blinked tears from his eyes. He had no idea who picked the song, but Blaine’s eyes had never left his. Did Blaine think he was out of Kurt’s league? How preposterous! It couldn’t be further from the truth. If anything Kurt felt like he was the one out of his league next to the shining star that was Blaine.

The audience applauded and Blaine jumped off the stage. Kurt offered him a shy smile, which he returned readily, his honey eyes aglow.

Someone sat down heavily next to him, sighing loudly. “There was never a chance for me, was there?” Sam asked with a rueful smile.

“Nope,” Kurt said, grinning at him.

“Damn. Got any single friends?” Sam asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Um, I might. I’ll get back to you on that,” Kurt replied.

“Good deal,” Sam said and got up to join the next group number.

Kurt’s eyes returned to Blaine and saw the hurt etched on his features. Wanting to say something, anything to erase that look, Kurt stood and walked toward him. Too late, Blaine had already rushed down the aisle and toward the door. By the time Kurt caught up to him, he was gone.

He was still making mistakes, making things worse between them. Was he really going to be such a fool as to keep the man he loved held at arm’s length because he had wanted to defend Kurt? Would he let love’s actions kill the love that he obviously still felt?

Returning to his seat, he sat there, lost in thought. Soon, he looked around and realized the room was empty. Practice had ended and he hadn’t even noticed. He wondered if anyone had tried to talk to him, but found he didn’t really care.

Needing a moment before the ride home, he walked up to the stage, looking through the music there. So many words to so many songs. Songs to celebrate, songs to mourn, songs to dance to, songs to fight with. He loved all of it. Music was in his soul, whether he was studying fashion or not. Any time he needed to ease the pain inside himself, it was music that made him feel whole again. Of course, up until recently, even that had changed. Blaine had been the one who could comfort him, let him know that everything was going to be okay.

Selecting a song, he started the audio equipment and walked to the center of the stage.

. . . . .

Blaine made sure he didn’t return to the auditorium until well after practice was over. He’d made enough of an ass out of himself by rushing out, he wasn’t going to show up in front of everyone just because he’d forgotten his bag. Coming down the hall, he heard music. Confused, he turned the corner, wondering what was going on. He saw Kurt on the stage, his face grieved. No matter how upset he was, seeing Kurt hurting was like a sharp knife to his heart. Pausing out of sight, he listened. It was interesting to hear Kurt sing a rock song, even if it was softer rock. But his perfect counter tenor was exquisite when it mixed with the lyrics and music.

 

_You call to me, and I fall at your feet_

_How could anyone ask for more?_

_And our time apart, like knives in my heart_

_How could anyone ask for more?_

_But if there's a pill to help me forget,_

_God knows I haven't found it yet_

_But I'm dying to, God I'm trying to_

_'Cause trying not to love you, only goes so far_

_And trying not to need you, is tearing me apart_

_Can't see the silver lining, from down here on the floor_

_And I just keep on trying, but I don't know what for_

_'Cause trying not to love you_

_Only makes me love you more_

_Only makes me love you more_

Blaine came fully into view. Kurt started when he saw him, but kept singing. He waved to a chair and Blaine went and sat down. Now Kurt sang to him, his heart in his voice.

_And this kind of pain, only time takes away_

_That's why it's harder to let you go_

_And nothing I can do, without thinking of you_

_That's why it's harder to let you go_

_But if there's a pill to help me forget,_

_God knows I haven't found it yet_

_But I'm dying to, God I'm trying to_

_'Cause trying not to love you, only goes so far_

_Trying not to need you, is tearing me apart_

_Can't see the silver lining, from down here on the floor_

_And I just keep on trying, but I don't know what for_

_'Cause trying not to love you_

_Only makes me love you more_

_So I sit here divided, just talking to myself_

_Was it something that I did?_

_Was there somebody else?_

_When a voice from behind me, that was fighting back tears_

_Sat right down beside me, whispered right in my ear_

_Said, I've been dying to tell you_

Kurt hit his hand against his chest, tears falling off his cheeks onto his shirt. He had never meant words more clearly than these.

_That trying not to love you, only went so far_

_Trying not to need you, was tearing me apart_

_Now I see the silver lining, of what we're fighting for_

_We just keep on trying, we could be much more_

_'Cause trying not to love you_

_Oh, yeah, trying not to love you_

_Only makes me love you more_

_Only makes me love you more_

 

The music ended and Kurt stood there staring down at Blaine. Standing up, Blaine walked to the edge of the stage, holding his hands up; an offering. Kurt lowered himself down into Blaine’s arms, wrapping his legs around his waist, tucking his head against Blaine’s neck.

“I’m so sorry, Blaine,” he wept. “I love you. Can you forgive me? Can I be yours again?”

Blaine stroked the back of his head. “Shh, baby. You’ve always been mine, you never stopped.”

Kurt gasped out a sob and moved his head so he could kiss Blaine, slanting their mouths together. They tasted each other and the salty tang of tears on their tongues. Kurt moaned into Blaine’s mouth, desperate for more, needing more.

“Um. The guys are all meeting for coffee,” Blaine said as their mouths finally separated and he lowered Kurt to the ground. “Would you accompany me?”

“No. I want to go home. With you.”

“Okay,” Blaine agreed quickly.

They quickly gathered their stuff and headed out to wait for the taxi Blaine had called earlier. They kept their arms wrapped around each other, touching faces, hands, skin. It was like waking up after a nightmare.

“I just want you to know,” Blaine said quietly, staring at the ground. “I’m not going to pressure you about getting married or anything. We can start as slow as you need to.”

Kurt snorted loudly. “Whatever. I want it all. Now,” he said and let go of Blaine.

Blaine started to object to the lack of touch until he saw Kurt’s hands go to his neck. He pulled a delicate silver chain out of his shirt, his engagement ring hanging from the end. Quickly working the latch, Kurt handed Blaine the ring. “Would you do the honor?” he asked, smiling and holding his left hand out.

Blaine grinned so big, he thought his face might crack. He gently slid the ring back into place and kissed Kurt’s hand. He’d had no idea when he’d woken up that this day would be perfect.

They were still smiling lovingly at each other when Blaine opened the door to their apartment. They did no more than drop their coats and bags before heading straight up the stairs.

Without a word, they began shedding their clothes before coming together on the bed. “God, I’ve missed this,” Blaine said, staring at Kurt’s naked form. “You are so beautiful, baby.”

“I’ve missed looking at you,” Kurt whispered. Taking in Blaine’s muscled arms and the deep V between his hip bones made him want to scream in need.

Laying together, they slowly worshiped each other’s bodies. Light touches against tender flesh. A lick here, a nip there. Kurt nibbled that V he loved under Blaine’s abs before licking down its path closer to Blaine’s hard, glistening cock. He quickly lapped up the moisture there, moaning at the taste of Blaine on his tongue.

Blaine returned the torture, licking and sucking at Kurt’s sensitive nipples before leaning down and licking along his balls. Kurt bucked up at the feeling of Blaine’s hot tongue against his flesh.

“No more, Blaine, I need you now,” Kurt begged.

Blaine slotted their mouths together, massaging their tongues together, hot and wet. Expertly he reached over and got out the lube and a condom.

Kurt cried out as a single finger entered him.

“Baby? Are you okay?” Blaine demanded as he froze in his movements.

“Oh god, yes. More please,” Kurt pleaded.

“You gotta let me go slow, here, babe. It’s been a while,” Blaine said gently, though he felt the same urgency to be one.

“No Blaine. More, now,” he demanded.

Blaine shook his head, but inserted another finger and they both moaned. Kurt at finally feeling that delicious fullness again. Blaine at the tight, hot flesh pressing around his fingers.

Within seconds, Kurt was urging him again. “Another, I’m ready,” he said, smacking at Blaine’s shoulders.

Blaine obliged him, going as slow as he could. But as soon as the third finger entered him, Kurt thrust down hard against it, crying out his pleasure. After only a moment, he began fucking himself down on Blaine’s fingers, moaning loudly.

“I love you, Blaine,” he gasped out.

“I love you, too, baby,” Blaine said. The sight of Kurt’s pale form, blushing pink from lust, bucking down on his fingers was the single most erotic thing he’d ever seen.

“I need you now,” Kurt muttered. “Please Blaine.”

Blaine grabbed the condom and began opening it. A hand stopped him. Kurt’s blue-green eyes were clouded with desire and determination. “No condom. We’re both clean. I need just you, Blaine. Even if it’s just this once. I need to feel just you inside me.”

Nodding, Blaine tossed it aside. He’d dreamed of how this would feel. No matter how thin condoms were, they still weren’t the real thing.

He lubed himself up, stroking himself as Kurt watched, a whimper escaping his lips. He lined himself up at Kurt’s entrance and slowly eased in. Both of them gasped and kept up a steady stream of moans and groans as Blaine slid all the way in. The feeling was so much more intense, hot and intimate with just their flesh against each other.

Blaine bent over and latched his lips onto Kurt’s as he started to slowly thrust into him. Kurt panted and sucked at his tongue desperately before leaning his head back so he could cry out loudly.

“Mine,” Blaine whispered in his ear, pounding into him.

“Yours, Blaine. Only yours,” Kurt agreed breathlessly.

Blaine knew he wasn’t going to last, so he grasped Kurt’s straining cock and began stroking him to the same rhythm that his hips were using. Kurt began giving small yips and cries as he got closer to his orgasm. Suddenly his back bowed off the bed, his hips high in the air as he keened loudly with pleasure, coming in jolting stripes across his stomach and chest. He collapsed back on the bed, shuddering from the force of his release. The sight of Kurt coming had pushed him over the edge and he yelled out Kurt’s name as he came, the orgasm and pulsing seeming to go on forever.

Finally their bodies calmed and Blaine slipped from Kurt, both of them hissing. Blaine collapsed next to Kurt, pulling him close. He felt moisture against his chest and looked down to see tears coursing down Kurt’s face.

“Baby, what is it?” Blaine asked, afraid he’d hurt him.

“It’s just, that was just, it was, you were perfect, Blaine,” he finally got out through his tears. “Everything I needed at that moment, you gave me.”

“I agree,” was all Blaine could say. He stroked Kurt’s hair and down his back, humming softly until Kurt’s tears were spent.

“I love you,” Kurt said, looking up at him with damp eyes.

“I love you, too,” Blaine said, smiling gently.

After laying there for a time, they went and took a leisurely shower. Hunger hit them both and they made a small picnic to take back up and eat on the bed. They got through their sandwiches quickly, Kurt making sure Blaine didn’t get crumbs on the covers. As they fed each other strawberries and grapes, licking juices from each other’s lips and chins, the food was soon forgotten. The lovers cleared the bed and feasted on each other instead until they finally fell into a blissful sleep, wrapped around each other as it was meant to be.

. . . . .

Kurt woke and stretched languidly, enjoying the small aches in his body. The clock showed that it was only five in the morning, and though he knew he could sleep more, he wasn’t interested. Instead he turned over to stare at Blaine, whose features were softened in sleep. His dark eyelashes were fanned out; Kurt was envious of how long his lashes were, but at least he got to stare at them. He hadn’t shaved for a couple days and the scruff growing made him want to rub his cheek on it. Kurt was sure he already had scruff burn on a couple parts of his body, but it was a pain he didn’t mind in the least.

Blaine moved in his sleep, drawing Kurt closer to him. Resting his arms on Blaine’s chest, he continued to stare at him. His lips were fascinating and Kurt was about to give in to the temptation of touching them when he was suddenly flipped over.

Golden eyes twinkled at him. “What are you doing awake at this ungodly hour?” Blaine sleep roughened voice asked him.

“Staring at the most beautiful creature on earth,” Kurt said with a smile.

“I don’t see a mirror, how did you see yourself?” Blaine teased.

“Whatever,” Kurt said, lightly smacking him. “Kiss me.”

“Okay, fine,” Blaine grumbled and gently molded their lips together.

Kurt got to do what he’d been wanting to do and licked at Blaine’s upper lip, the one that drove him to distraction. Opening his eyes to stare at Blaine, he smiled into the precious face of the man he loved.

Blaine was staring at Kurt, knowing Kurt must be able to see the adoration he felt. He was leaning in for another kiss, when Kurt’s expression suddenly changed. Horror crossed his features and his lips moved too slow to call out a warning. Blaine had no time to react and the last thing he saw was the utter terror on Kurt’s beautiful face.

 

. . . . .

**"Out Of My League" by Stephen Speaks**

**“Trying Not To Love You” by Nickelback**


	26. Chapter 26

Blaine knew this was the perfect moment. He had the man he loved in his arms and they were slowly dancing, wrapped up in each other. He sang softly in Kurt’s ear, loving when Kurt would harmonize with him. They were perfect together in every aspect.

 

_When I see your smile_

_Tears roll down my face I can't replace_

_And now that I'm strong I have figured out_

_How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul_

_And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one_

“You are the one,” Kurt murmured in his ear. “You are mine.”

“Mm, yes. Yours,” Blaine responded, kissing Kurt softly. He loved the soft glow that came to those blue-green eyes when he kissed him. It was a look that was just for him, just for them. He would never get tired of it. He twirled Kurt around as they sang together, not caring what or who was around them. This moment was all for them.

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_It's okay. It's okay. It's okay._

_Seasons are changing_

_And waves are crashing_

_And stars are falling all for us_

_Days grow longer and nights grow shorter_

_I can show you I'll be the one_

“I love you, Blaine,” Kurt said, his glasz full of emotion. “You are everything to me.”

“I love you, too, baby,” Blaine said, leaning their foreheads together. Every word he sang was a promise, a vow to this man.

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

Blaine began twirling Kurt around the floor in wide circles, loving the way Kurt’s head tilted back, his face lit up with pure joy. Blaine sang with all he had in him, his eyes never leaving Kurt’s face.

_Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart_

_Please don't throw that away_

_Cuz I'm here for you_

_Please don't walk away and_

_Please tell me you'll stay whoa, stay whoa!_

“I will always stay with you,” Kurt murmured solemnly. His eyes bored into Blaine with the sincerity of his words. “I will never leave you.”

Blaine just kept singing, his soul complete, his heart full.

_I will never let you fall_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

Blaine was still humming the words as he woke up. It had been the most wonderful dream he’d ever had. But even that couldn’t keep his eyes closed because he had the real thing waiting for him here. Opening his eyes a crack, he reached across the bed for Kurt, whining when he realized the bed was empty. Making his eyes cooperate enough to fully open, he looked around, sitting up. As he sat, his head began to pound, sending shockwaves of pain through him.

“Damn,” he moaned, reaching up to rub the area that hurt. When his hand encountered matted hair and a lump, dread filled him. Bringing his hand around, he saw it was covered in partially dried blood. That was when the memory of the previous night hit him. They’d been kissing when Kurt’s expression had changed from loving to terrified. His mouth had moved as if trying to warn him or call out, but that was all Blaine could remember. Cold fear lanced through him, making him forget his head.

“Kurt!” he yelled, jumping from the bed. “Ah,” he groaned as he became dizzy and lightheaded. Ignoring it, he stumbled down the stairs, yelling Kurt’s name. “Kurt? Baby, are you here? Kurt!”

The apartment was empty. Something yellow caught his eye, a piece of paper taped to the door. Running to it, he cried out in agony as he read the words.

_You killed the one I love, now I will kill the one you love. - S_

“No!” Blaine screamed, falling to the floor, the note clutched in his fist. “Kurt!”

He rocked back and forth, letting himself give into the fear for a time before picking himself up. They would want him to try and find Kurt, to try and stop them. And he would. He would do whatever it took. Running upstairs, he slid into some jeans and a t-shirt and grabbed his phone. Calling the one number he could trust, he prayed that Kurt was still alive.

“Boss man?” the voice came.

“Kurt’s been taken. Kidnapped by Smythe’s men,” Blaine said, his voice filled with fury.

“From where?”

“My bed. And I’d like to know how the fuck that happened seeing as how I paid out the ass for the best security system money could buy,” Blaine bit out.

“Shit. I don’t know, sir. We’ll look into it. And we’ll have a team of men assembled and to your neighbor’s apartment within the hour,” he said.

“I don’t just want a team. I want the best. The best guy you have, I don’t care where he is, how much he is, I don’t give a fuck. I want him here with the team, in an hour,” Blaine demanded. “I will get Kurt back if I have to kill everyone in fucking New York to do it.”

“Yes, sir, boss man. One hour,” he said and disconnected.

Blaine put his head in his hands. How could this happen? Everything had just gotten back to good, now this? Was Kurt okay? Was he scared? Of course he was scared, anyone would be if they were kidnapped from their home in the middle of the night. Blaine had failed in keeping him safe. He’d meant what he said though. He didn’t care who had to die, he would get Kurt back.

The lyrics of the song he’d been singing to Kurt came back to haunt him.

 

_I will never let you fall_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

 

Though he’d failed in being there for him through it all, he would save him. Even if it meant dying.

 

. . . . .

 

“Why do you do those every morning?” Colton mumbled from the bed. “You already look amazing.”

“How do you think I got this way? I have good genetics, but not that good,” Jason grunted from where he was doing push-ups on the floor.

“You make me tired just watching you,” Colton said. His phone rang and he reached out for it blearily.

“Hello? Blaine? Yeah, okay,” he said, suddenly sounding alert. He punched a button on his phone. “Jason, it’s Blaine, says he needs to talk to us. Go ahead, Blaine.”

Jason sat up on his knees, his brow knitted with concern.

“Um, I don’t know how to say this gently, so I’ll just say it. Kurt was kidnapped last night,” Blaine said.

Colton and Jason gasped, both going pale. “I’m handling it. I’ve got all the necessary people working on it and we’ll get him back. I was wondering if one of you could make up some sort of family emergency story for him with his classes so he won’t get kicked out for attendance.”

“Sure,” Colton volunteered. “What about you?”

“I’ve got that under control,” Blaine said.

“Is there anything we can do?” Jason asked, wiping his face on a towel, unable to believe what poor Kurt was going through.

“Just keep your phone nearby. I have no idea what kind of situation he’s in. If he manages to get to a phone, I want all lines open so he can get in touch with one of us,” Blaine replied.

“You got it,” Jason said. “Let us know if you need anything okay?”

“Thanks, man. I’ll keep you updated,” Blaine said and disconnected.

Jason and Colton sat there for a moment, in shock.

“Poor Kurt,” Colton said in a quiet voice.

“No kidding,” Jason replied.

“I’m going to, um, take a shower,” Colton said, his face pale.

Jason stood and came to him. “Hey, you okay?” he asked, taking the small man in his arms.

Colton wrapped himself around Jason, breathing in his scent and taking comfort in his strength. “I just can’t believe all that Kurt has been through and now this. What is it going to do to him?”

Jason nuzzled the top of his head. “Kurt is stronger than any of us give him credit for. We’ll just keep that in our minds until we get him back. Go take a shower, use up all the hot water if you want.”

“Thanks Jas,” Colton said and kissed him softly.

Jason turned the kiss from soft to fierce, his arms locking around the man he’d come to love. His lips and arms told Colton that he would never let him go, never let anything bad happen to him. When Jason finally let him go, Colton smiled at him.

“I love you,” he said.

“I love you, too,” Jason said, a soft light in his brown eyes.

. . . . .

“I want to know what the FUCK happened, and I want to know NOW,” Blaine yelled as he let himself into the apartment across the hall from his.

All four men jumped to attention, their eyes wide and wary.

“Sir?” the man in charge asked.

“What do you mean _sir_? What the fuck happened last night?” Blaine demanded.

“We don’t know what you mean, sir. Nothing happened, we just traded with the night shift an hour ago and they said there was nothing to report,” the man said, a bit nervous at the furious light in his boss’s gold eyes.

“I want the night shift back here and I want them back here five minutes ago! Now, my fiancé was _fucking_ kidnapped from our _fucking_ apartment in the middle of the _fucking_ night and I want to know how the hell it happened and how the _fuck_ it was even possible!” he yelled.

One man raced to a phone and started making calls. Another man jumped to the massive computer set-up and began typing into the system. The third man looked like he wanted to duck under the desk, but instead offered to make coffee which Blaine gave a curt nod to.

The fourth man, the lead, continued to stand in front of Blaine. He didn’t know why this man was so intimidating. He wasn’t that tall or hugely muscular, but the power that exuded from him was absolute. There was never any need to question him. His authority was final. And god, he hoped that he wouldn’t lose his job over this. Or his life.

“The night guys will be in here in twenty minutes, sir,” the phone guy said.

“Sir, if you’ll come over here, I have the night surveillance tapes ready,” the other man said.

Blaine went over and looked at the monitors. There was a camera outside his door, just inside his door and at various places throughout the apartment, not including the bedroom.

“Here is when you and Mr. Hummel arrived,” the man pointed out and Blaine watched, his heart aching as he and Kurt entered the apartment, the view switching to the interior camera. He and Kurt dropped their coats and bags and rushed up the stairs. “Um, we don’t see anything for a time, then we see this,” the man said. The tape rushed forward and now showed them in their boxers going in to raid the kitchen. He wanted to reach through the screen and shield Kurt somehow, protect him from whatever was coming. “Then, all is quiet until you got up.” The screen showed Blaine rushing around the apartment, obviously yelling, his face terrified. “There is no evidence that anyone came in at all. Is it possible Mr. Hummel left?” the man asked.

Instantly, Blaine had the man out of his chair and held by the neck against the wall. “How the fuck would Mr. Hummel have left if you don’t have it on tape?” he growled. “And how would this have been taped to the inside of my fucking front door?” he yelled, shoving the note into the man’s face. Abruptly, he let him go. “We need to figure out who fucked with the system. I want each of the night shift questioned and re-questioned until we can be absolutely certain one of them is not the mole. Somebody got into my apartment without the camera’s catching it. I want to know how,” Blaine demanded.

With that, he left, slamming the door behind him before going back to his apartment. He ran up the stairs and fell onto his bed, burying his face into Kurt’s pillow, desperate to at least smell him. After laying there for a moment, he got up and was about to go downstairs when he saw Kurt’s long sleeve v-neck shirt on the floor where Blaine had thrown it the previous night. He took it and slipped it on, tears stinging his eyes as the aroma of Kurt and his body-wash surrounded him.

He made a couple phone calls to the school, ensuring that any absence he had would be excused. It definitely helped to have the connections he did sometimes. He had thought those connections would keep Kurt safe. That was the reason behind moving here, to this apartment. Now he felt violated. Someone had come into their sanctuary and took away the sense of security.

Making some toast, though he wasn’t hungry, he sat down to eat it. He knew he needed to keep strong. There was no telling how long this could go on and he had to be ready for anything.

 

. . . . .

 

His head ached something fierce and his mouth was dry. Kurt blinked his eyes slowly, moaning at the pain and tried to lick his lips. Instead he licked a piece of cloth and wondered why he had fabric in his mouth. Suddenly he remembered. Laying in bed, kissing Blaine, then seeing a large man come up behind him and hit him in the head. Blaine’s limp body had fallen to the side and the man had grabbed for Kurt. Before he could get out a yell, the man’s fist came down and Kurt knew no more. Now he was in a dark room with fabric in his mouth. He reached up to pull it out and realized his arms were tied down. A quick tug proved his legs were also tied down. Probably to a chair, judging by the feel of it. As he tested out his other senses, he found that it wasn’t a dark room, but some sort of sack was over his head. He could still breathe easy enough, so it must be some sort of real material, nothing synthetic. He mentally shook his head at himself. Now was not the time to prove what he knew about different fabrics. Obviously, he’d been kidnapped. The main question was why? Was it because of who Blaine associated with? Or was it because of something Blaine had done? Sebastian’s face came to mind, unbidden. Yes, that would most likely be the answer.

Oddly enough, though he was afraid, he wasn’t terrified. Not like he’d been when he’d been attacked before. Maybe it was because he knew that he’d already been hurt as badly as he could be. Maybe it was because he knew Blaine would come for him. He could take getting beat up, hell, he’d done it for years. He would stay strong. For Blaine. He had to make Blaine proud. If that thought could keep him sane, he’d make it through this in one piece.

Trying to hear as hard as he could, he didn’t detect anyone close by. There weren’t any distinguishing sounds or smells that he could place.

After he gave up on that, he began singing to himself, song after song in his head, keeping himself occupied and hopefully, sane.

Just as he got through the final verse of “Happy Days Are Here Again”, he heard footsteps.

Suddenly the bag was lifted off his head. Cotton, he noticed absently. The light was bright and he blinked his eyes rapidly, trying to see who was near him.

Looking up, he saw a tall, thin man in an expensive suit. Dior, if he wasn’t mistaken.

“Hello, Mr. Hummel,” the man said, his voice smooth and refined. “Do you know who I am?”

Kurt shook his head, still blinking against the light.

The man knelt down in front of him and Kurt froze. The man had a narrow face, mocking green eyes, and an all too familiar smirk on his lips. “Ah, I see you recognize me now. Or maybe not me, but you definitely knew my son. I’m Chandler Smythe. And your boyfriend killed my son, Sebastian. And I believe it’s only fair that since he killed the one I love the most that I get to kill the one he loves the most. Don’t you agree?”

Kurt’s eyes went wide and he prayed he would be brave enough to get through this.

. . . . .

Blaine was putting the last of the dishes in the dishwasher, trying to stay busy, when the doorbell rang. Finally, he thought, the rest of the special team must be here.

He opened the door, about to snap out an order, when he stopped.

“Jason, what are you doing here? It’s really not a good time,” Blaine said, trying not to yell at him to go away. He didn’t need any of his college friends seeing or even being aware of the type of people he dealt with.

“What do you mean? You asked me to come here,” Jason said with an easy smile.

“Um, no. I asked you to keep your phone nearby, but I didn’t ask you to come over,” Blaine said, confused.

“You asked for the best man we’ve got. And I’m it, boss man,” Jason said, grinning.

Blaine just stood there, mouth gaping.

. . . . .

**“My Guardian Angel” by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus**


	27. Chapter 27

 “I can see you know what I’m referring to. That’s good. I would hate to think that all of this vengeance business would go to waste on someone who didn’t know the whole story,” Chandler Smythe said. He stood and paced in front of Kurt.

Kurt tried to hold back the panic that was threatening to overwhelm him. His stomach churned and he fought back the nausea.

“I still don’t know why Anderson decided to target my son. Maybe you can shed some light on the topic,” he continued. “Any ideas?”

Kurt thought quickly. Would it hurt or help him to tell this man that his son had tried to rape him? He decided it wouldn’t help, that it might just make him more upset. He shrugged, keeping his eyes wide.

Smythe stared at him for a time. “Somehow I don’t believe you. We’ll see what we can do to convince you to start talking,” he said with a grim smile. “Marco, you want to come in here? This is Mr. Hummel,” he told the hulking man who came in.

The man was unbelievably tall and built like a football player. His fists had to be the size of Kurt’s head. His eyes were black and had no compassion in them. The nausea Kurt was feeling intensified as terror overtook him.

“Mr. Hummel can’t seem to remember some pertinent information on why my Sebastian was killed. I’m hoping that you can refresh his memory,” Smythe said. “I don’t want to hear anything from you until he’s talking, got it?”

“Yes, sir, Mr. Smythe. I’ll have this little bird singing in no time,” the man said, sounding like his voice was made of gravel. He made Barry White sound like a soprano.

Smythe left the room with a parting smile at Kurt.

Kurt watched him leave, more scared than he’d ever been in his life. He whimpered as Marco came over and gently untied the rag tied around his mouth. Kurt tried to cover up his shock. Marco smiled at Kurt as moved his jaw around, loosening the muscles and trying to get some moisture back in his mouth.

“Water?” the man said, his voice softer than when he’d been dealing with Smythe.

Kurt nodded warily. The man took out a bottle of water from a small cooler and opened it. He brought it to Kurt and held it as Kurt drank thirstily. The water was cold and felt wonderful in his desiccated mouth and throat. He drank as much as he could handle, unsure when he would get more. Finally, though, he had to pull away.

Marco capped the water and put it on a table nearby. Kurt took the opportunity to look around. He appeared to be in a basement. The walls were plain, no decoration or paint. There were several tables and folding chairs around. He could see stairs leading up, but there were no windows anywhere.

“Now, Mr. Hummel, I’m Marco. What’s your first name?” he asked, sitting backward in a chair, resting his crossed arms across the back.

“K, Kurt,” he whispered, his throat still feeling raw.

“Kurt. Nice to meet you. Obviously, this isn’t the most pleasant situation. But we can make the most of it, you and I. You tell me what I need to know and that’s all the part I have to play in this little war. Sound good?” Marco said, his tone comforting.

Kurt nodded. He liked the sound of making things easy. But how would this man react any different than Smythe would at the information he had?

“So. Mr. Smythe’s son was killed. I know, I know, the coroner said it was a heroin overdose. Of course, Mr. Smythe doesn’t believe his son had a drug problem, but between you and me, I think it makes total sense. Do you know if Sebastian had a drug problem?” he asked, his eyebrows up.

“Yes,” Kurt whispered. “He was into heroin and I don’t know what else.”

“And how do you know this information?” Marco asked, seeming pleased at Kurt’s willingness to talk.

“Some guys saw him buying drugs outside of Screamers,” Kurt said.

“Thank you, Kurt. That’s good to know. Now we know where we can start looking for the seller. You don’t happen to know who sold him the drugs, do you?”

Kurt shook his head. “I’ve never even been to that club.”

“Okay, I didn’t think so. You don’t look like the club type. But I have to ask, it’s part of my job,” he said with a wink.

Kurt’s stomach started to relax. Maybe telling what he knew wouldn’t be the worst thing he could do. Marco didn’t seem all that bad. He knew it was his job to get information, but maybe it was just his size that was meant to intimidate people into talking. He knew it was working on him.

“You’re doing really good, Kurt. I appreciate your honesty. Do you want to use the bathroom?” he offered.

Kurt nodded. Anything to give him a chance to get up and stretch.

“Now you know it wouldn’t do you any good to fight or try to run, right?” Marco clarified.

Kurt nodded again. He wasn’t stupid. It was a David and Goliath situation here and he didn’t have a slingshot or a deity on his side.

“Excellent. Okay, let’s get you untied,” Marco said. He went behind Kurt and quickly loosened the ropes holding him.

Kurt rubbed his wrists and twisted his feet around, wincing as feeling returned painfully.

“This way, Kurt,” Marco said and walked out of the room. “In there,” he said, pointing to a small bathroom. “There is no window, no outside door, no way to get out. So I’ll let you have the door closed. But I will be right here and you have exactly two minutes. That should be plenty of time to do your business. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Kurt said.

“Okay. Go ahead,” Marco said, nodding toward the door.

Kurt went in and closed the door. He quickly used the toilet. Knowing he would probably be tied back up, he jogged in place for a moment, bending down and touching his toes to get the kinks out of his back. He had no idea what else he could do. There was nothing in the room that he could use as a weapon. Empty toilet paper rolls couldn’t even give a paper cut, so he was out of luck. Loosening up his muscles was as all he could think of. He washed his hands and splashed his face before opening the door.

“Two minutes on the dot. Great job, Kurt,” Marco said with a smile.

Kurt hesitantly returned the smile. They went back into the room. Marco pointed at the wooden chair where Kurt had been before and Kurt sat down willingly.

“If you can stay cooperative, I don’t have a problem leaving you untied. Can you be cooperative?”

Kurt nodded, though he didn’t know what he was going to do when he asked about why Sebastian died.

“I like you, Kurt. You seem like an okay kind of guy. Not the usual kind of guy I work, with, I’ll tell you that much,” Marco chuckled darkly.

Kurt did not want to know the usual kind of guy this man worked on. Those kind of people would make Karofsky and Azimio look like angels.

“So, Kurt. Let’s get back to the business at hand. You know that Sebastian is dead, yes?”

“Yes,” Kurt answered.

“And you believe it was due to heroin?”

“Yes,” Kurt said confidently.

“Good. Okay. Was the heroin tampered with?” Marco asked, his eyes sharp on Kurt’s face.

Kurt called on every acting skill he had. “I don’t know.”

“Uh huh,” Marco said thoughtfully. “Do you know if Sebastian had any enemies there at your school?”

“I don’t think he was very well liked,” Kurt said hesitantly.

Marco snorted. “That isn’t hard to believe with that kid. Did you like him, Kurt?”

“No,” Kurt said.

Marco grinned. “I like your honesty. So let’s go back to the question you lied about. Was the heroin tampered with, or wasn’t it?”

“I don’t know,” Kurt insisted.

“That’s too bad. I was pretty certain you’d know the answer to that question,” Marco said. He stood and Kurt’s stomach dropped. But the large man just started walking around the room.

“What were your interactions with Sebastian like?” he asked as he paced.

“He, um, didn’t like me. He hit on me and I turned him down,” Kurt said, seeing no reason to lie.

“What do you mean? Sebastian wasn’t gay,” Marco said, looking truly confused.

“I think he might have been. But maybe it was because he was using drugs,” Kurt whispered, his heart pounding. Shit, they didn’t know Sebastian was gay? What if they decided to take it out on Kurt?

“Huh. I’ll have to discuss that little tidbit with Mr. Smythe. That won’t go over well. So, let’s try that question again. Was the heroin tampered with?” Marco said, coming nearer.

Kurt had no way to try and convince him, other than to lie. If he told him yes, than he’d want to know who tampered with it. But they already seemed to know Blaine was to blame, so why would they need him to confirm it? He bit his lip and decided to give a partial answer.

“There were rumors, but nobody knows for sure,” he said quietly.

“Ah, so you did know more than you were letting on. Tut tut, Kurt. If we’re going to be nice to each other, you need to be more forthcoming,” Marco said, stroking his chin. He paced a couple times, then before Kurt could process the action, Marco’s hand flung out and cracked against the left side of his face.

He cried out and tasted blood in his mouth from where his teeth had bit into his cheek. Immediately, he could feel his face beginning to swell, and he thought his cheekbone might be cracked.

“Now that was just a slap and not even with my dominant hand, so unless you want the full meal deal,” Marco said, flexing his hand and making a fist. “Then I suggest you tell me everything you know.”

Kurt nodded, unable to help the tears of pain that trickled down his face.

“So, let’s try this again. The heroin might have been tampered with. I think you might know more than that. But let’s leave that for now. Why would Anderson want to hurt Sebastian?” Marco asked, sitting back on the chair in front of Kurt.

Kurt took a deep breath, trying to focus past the pain. It was going to be a long day. There was no way he was going to say anything against Blaine. And there was no way Marco was going to be okay with that.

. . . . .

 

Blaine knew his jaw was hanging open, but he couldn’t hold back his shock. “Huh?” was all he could get out.

Jason chuckled. “I’ve been working with the guys for years.”

Blaine shook his head. “Huh? Uh, how? What?”

Jason clapped him on the back. “It’s pretty fun seeing you like this, you know that. I just wish this hadn’t had to come out like this. I wish it hadn’t had to come out at all. Now my cover is blown.”

“Your cover? Okay, hold it,” Blaine said, holding up a hand. “Who the hell are you and what the hell is going on?”

“Got any coffee?” Jason asked. “I had to rush over here so fast I didn’t get my first cup. I don’t want to get crabby.”

“Um, sure,” Blaine said and led the way to the kitchen where he got them both a cup.

“Ah, thanks,” Jason said, gulping it gratefully.

They sat on the couch, facing each other. “I’ll give you a bit of history first. I was in the military. Black ops. Basically, we were the guys who went in and took care of shit nobody else had the balls to. When I got out, I was approached by your father to join his little band of merry men. The pay was too much to turn down. After a year, I told him I was going to quit. I was tired of it all. I wanted to go to college, you know, do something with my life while I was still young. When I told him that, he got all excited. He told me I could stay on the payroll and go to college. All I had to do was look after his son,” Jason said pointedly.

Blaine tried to wrap his mind around all of the information. “Wait, my dad was paying you to watch over _me_?”

“Is paying,” Jason corrected. “Why do you think I’ve been on the fringes of your life since you started?”

“But you’re a junior and I’m a sophomore,” Blaine said, starting with small details.

“You know how easy it is to work things to your benefit when you know the right people. But I really am going to classes and doing the work. All of that is real,” Jason assured him. “And hopefully, I’ll even graduate with a degree eventually.”

“But Colton, does he know?” Blaine had to know.

A shadow seemed to pass over Jason’s handsome face, his brown eyes troubled. “Not yet. He’s going to have to find out now. It kills me to know he may hate me for keeping this from him. I just can’t risk his safety by keeping him in the dark.”

“I’m sorry. I had no idea who you really were, or I could have asked for somebody else,” Blaine said sincerely.

“Hey, I’m glad to do this. I care about Kurt too, and I’m going to help you get him back,” Jason said firmly.

“Wait a second. Why didn’t you help Kurt the night he was attacked?” Blaine asked, suddenly upset.

“Blaine, you were my priority. I had someone watching over you as you went to dinner with your mother and so I was able to take the night off. I went to the party and though I kept an eye on Kurt as much as I could, when he chose to leave, I decided to stay. There was no more way for me to know what was going to happen then there was for you,” Jason pointed out, his eyes sad.

Blaine’s anger deflated. Jason was right. “So, how can you help me find out where they took Kurt?”

“Because I know who the mole is. And we are going to teach the mole how to sing,” Jason said, a grim smile on his face.

Blaine stared at him. The jovial, easy-going man he was friends with now looked more dangerous than anyone he’d ever met.

“Do I know who he is?” Blaine asked. He’d had his doubts about that Sam kid. He seemed too good to be true, and he’d been all over Kurt. He secretly hoped it was him so he could have a free reason to beat him to a pulp.

“Nope. We’ve been watching the night workers across the hall. A guy named Hal had been acting suspiciously. We planted a couple secret cameras and we didn’t catch anything. Until last night. The video shows Hal turning off the security system and cameras for Smythe’s men. Then he set a loop on the videos , so it would look like nobody ever came in,” Jason said, shaking his head.

“The guys said they were calling in the night shift guys so we could talk to them. That means he should be over there right now,” Blaine said, standing.

“Indeed,” Jason smiled, draining the last of his coffee.

They went across the hall and Blaine unlocked the door. The men all gasped, seeing the tall man beside him. Jason walked up to one of the men and whispered in his ear. The man pointed to one of the bedrooms, his eyes full of fear. Jason appeared to have quite the reputation among the guys here. Blaine was impressed and suddenly glad to have him there. It made him feel like he wasn’t completely alone in all of this.

“This way, boss man,” Jason said and led the way to the room.

They walked in and saw the overweight and slightly balding man sitting on a chair. The room, which was supposed to be a bedroom, had various tables and chairs set up along with several cots. The man, Hal, had his head in his hands.

“Hey, Hal,” Jason said.

Hal’s head shot up and panic shot across his face before he managed to straighten out his features. “Uh, hey, Jason. Didn’t know you were going to be around.”

“Yeah, well, they had to call in the big guns for this job,” Jason said easily. “So, what do you know about what happened last night?”

“It was just a regular night. We saw Mr. Anderson and Mr. Hummel a couple times on the camera, but other than that, it was a quiet night,” Hal said quickly. He was sweating profusely and wiped his hand across his forehead.

“Now, see, I happen to know that you know a tad bit more than that,” Jason said. “We have cameras everywhere, Hal, my friend. We saw some pretty interesting stuff last night. And you were the main attraction of the little show. Want to tell us who you are working for?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Hal insisted, his face going pale.

“Okay, well I was hoping it wouldn’t come down to this. Boss, would you mind leaving me alone here with Hal for a moment. I’m going to need to convince him that it’s best if he starts talking,” Jason said, cracking his knuckles and turning to Blaine with a wink.

“Sure thing,” Blaine said and started walking toward the door.

“Wait! Wait, please, don’t leave Mr. Anderson,” Hal pleaded.

Blaine turned back and saw naked terror on the man’s face as he stared at Jason.

“I’ll tell you everything I know,” Hal said.

“Now that is exactly what I was hoping to hear,” Jason said, grabbing a chair and sitting down.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning for violence...

Kurt glared at Marco as much as he could with both of his eyes swollen. The man had turned sadistic with his torture methods, putting hot sauce made with ghost chilis on his tongue and laughing as the sauce literally burned Kurt’s tongue. He’d offered him food only to find out it was rancid and letting Kurt vomit all over himself. That was unforgiveable. Everything else he could handle, he’d found the strength within himself. But to sit back while Kurt ruined his clothes? That deserved retribution as nothing else would. Marco had never bothered to tie him down again, Kurt was too weak to run anyway. Marco liked to be thorough and petty all at the same time. He’d come over and punch Kurt in the stomach and then kick him in the knee or shin as he walked away. His huge size 14, steel-toed shitkickers left his legs throbbing and unable to move right.

Currently he was alone in the room and he couldn’t get his body to cooperate in getting any sort of movement going. Besides, Marco would be back soon. He always was.

The heavy thud of his boots was the only warning of his approach. Marco came into the room wearing his trademark grin. The grin that had fooled Kurt at first. The grin that he now knew only meant Marco enjoyed being a sadistic fucker.

Marco held up two pieces of shiny metal. “Know what these are, Kurt?”

Kurt could only find the strength to shrug.

“Well, they can be quite fun to play with if you know what you’re doing. I’m gonna show you what I mean. First I gotta run to the bathroom. Do you need to go? Oh wait, I don’t care!” he laughed and walked off to the bathroom, setting the shiny pieces on the table next to the bat and the knife and the pickle fork. Kurt would never be able to use a pickle fork again. Not after it had been used on him.

As soon as he heard the bathroom door closed, he pushed himself to stand, demanding that his legs cooperate. This was his moment. He had to find the strength to do this or he might never get out of this basement alive.

Of course he knew what those pieces of metal were. They were sai swords, and he knew how to use them. He could use them very well. He didn’t think he’d ever even told Blaine. It was such a random skill that he never knew if he’d ever have a chance to use it. He’d had to sell his set before he moved to New York. They had helped pay his bus fare.

His body seemed to know what was required of it, so he walked quickly to the table and picked up the swords. His fingers were in unbelievable pain from having several of them broken. But he gritted his teeth and began passing the swords through his fingers, twirling them expertly to his sides, in front of him, and behind him. His hands knew the movements as well as his lungs knew how to breathe. He couldn’t even count how many hours he’d practiced with the swords, wishing he could use them on bullies like Karofsky. Now he could. Kurt couldn’t let himself wonder if he’d have the stomach for what he had to do. There couldn’t be any doubt going in. Otherwise, Marco could overpower him and the retribution for that might be fatal.

He shoved his arms out, stabbing the air before swirling the swords again and coming in to the center from both sides. Nodding, he was satisfied that he could do this. He felt empowered, strengthened and ready for what could be the most dangerous moment of his life.

Kurt walked quickly to the wall where Marco wouldn’t be able to see him when he came out of the bathroom. He heard the toilet flush and the door open. Really, even henchmen needed to wash their hands, cuz ew! Focus, Kurt, he told himself. His hands tightened on the swords, feeling the power in the cold steel.

“Kuuurt,” Marco called. “Where’d ya go? You don’t really think you can get out of here, do you?”

Kurt heard those boots approaching and got into a fighting stance, the swords ready. Marco came around the corner and saw him.

Laughing, he stopped and just stared. “Really, Kurt? You think you can do something with those pig stickers?”

Kurt stepped away from the wall and began twirling the swords around his fingers expertly, up, over, and through his fingers.

Marco looked impressed. “Well, I honestly didn’t see that one coming.”

Kurt threw himself forward, the swords flashing around his hands. Marco didn’t move fast enough and the first sword sliced through his shirt, blood immediately leaking from the wound on his chance. Kurt darted backward and danced from foot to foot, ready for the next strike.

“You little bastard,” Marco growled, all sarcasm and teasing gone. “You are gonna pay for that.”

Marco came at him, throwing a punch at his head. Kurt ducked down, twirling around with his knees bent and threw the sword out in front of him. Marco screamed when it pierced his stomach and again as Kurt’s second sword joined the first.

As quick as before, Kurt moved backward, trying to ignore the blood and other things dripping from the swords and from Marco’s stomach.

This time as Marco lunged at him, Kurt was ready. He was about to duck again when he saw Marco’s foot try to sweep his out from under him. Kurt thanked Sue Sylvester and the Cheerios and leapt into splits in the air, plunging his swords out at the same time, crossed over each other before jerking them harshly apart.

He landed on the floor, panting and in pain. Marco was staggering, mindless, as his throat lay open, blood pouring from the fatal wounds.

Marco tried to speak but his vocal cords had been sliced and all Kurt could hear was the wet sounds of him dying.

Kurt didn’t even watch him fall to the floor before he sprinted for the stairs to try and make his escape. He had no idea if there were other people up there, but he was ready. Later, when he was safe, he’d think about the fact that he’d just killed a man.

“Kurt!” came the most beautiful voice in the world.

“Blaine?” Kurt called back, his throat sore from the hot sauce.

“I’m here, baby,” he heard and then the room went black.

Cold water in his face woke him up. Why would Blaine splash water in his face? Kurt opened his eyes as much as he could and gasped.

“Morning, sleeping beauty,” Marco said, sitting on his usual chair in front of Kurt, holding an empty cup. “You were having one hell of a dream. I almost had to tie you down again. What were you dreaming about?”

Kurt swallowed, disappointment flooding him. Just a dream. But it had lent him more strength if nothing else. “I dreamed of killing you,” he rasped.

“Aw, I’m touched,” Marco said with a grin. “And because I’m so touched, I’m going to give you a treat. How about the pickle forks again? You sure liked that last time. Had you squealing like a little pig,” Marco said, walking over to the table.

Kurt looked desperately, but there were no sai swords. It had all been part of the dream. Now he had to live through the pickle forks again, those thin little blades that Marco liked to stab into random parts of his body.

Blaine, where are you, he thought miserably and screamed hoarsely at the first stab.

. . . . .

“So we have three possible locations for where Kurt is being kept,” Jason told Blaine as he came out of the room where the mole, Hal was being kept. Jason was rubbing his knuckles, but had a piece of paper in his hand.

“When do we go?” Blaine asked, standing up, ready to move.

“You aren’t going anywhere, boss man. Any one of these could be a trap and you’d be dead before we could do anything about it,” Jason said.

“You expect me to sit here while Kurt is who fucking knows where? While he could be hurting and scared? Are you fucking kidding me?” Blaine yelled.

“Yes, I expect you to stay here. Wouldn’t you rather find Kurt alive or would you rather die because you walked in on a trap?”

“I fucking hate you,” Blaine bit out.

“I love you, too,” Jason said with a wink. “Now, I hope you don’t mind, but I called in my second hand man. He’ll lead the second team as we scout these locations.”

“You do whatever you have to do to get Kurt back alive. When is he getting here?” Blaine asked, suddenly exhausted.

“He’s coming up right now. He sent me a text,” Jason said at Blaine’s questioning look.

A moment later there was a series of knocks at the door. At the correct sequence, Jason opened the door.

“Hey, man, thanks for coming,” Jason said, letting him in.

“What else was I gonna do today? Go to classes or some shit?” the man said.

Blaine rolled his eyes, recognizing the familiar voice. “Puck? Seriously? This is your second hand man, Jason?”

Puck grinned. “Hey, I learned some mean skills cleaning pools,” he said laughing.

Blaine swore to himself that if he kept cracking jokes, he’d bash his mohawked head against the wall. Luckily, he didn’t have to.

“What’s the situation?” Puck asked, his grin disappearing and a new expression of concentration taking its place.

Jason told him everything, Puck nodding and asking intelligent questions occasionally. Soon they had a plan and split into three groups. They told Blaine they would contact him as soon as they knew anything. They knew Blaine would want to be there when Kurt was found and they wouldn’t deny him that.

All too soon, Blaine was alone. The smallest of crews stayed behind to guard him and watch things on the monitors.

Blaine walked back over to his apartment, despising the feeling of helplessness. He was sitting down to a cup of coffee when his phone rang. It was a strange number, but he answered, hoping it was news, though the guys had just left minutes before.

“Finally, you’re alone,” a voice said. “I was starting to think I’d have to wait all day to get you rid of those goons.”

“Who is this?” Blaine demanded.

“Oh, I’m sorry. We’ve never officially met, have we? Though I feel like I know you already. I am Chandler Smythe, father of the man you killed.”

“Where is Kurt?”

“So you aren’t going to deny you had something to do with my son’s death?”

“I want to know where Kurt is,” Blaine said between clenched teeth.

“Alright, well I guess we can discuss your part in all this after you’ve joined our little party,” Smythe said and rattled off an address. It wasn’t on the list of addresses Hal had given them.

“I’ll be there in ten minutes,” Blaine said.

“Excellent. Until then,” Smythe said and hung up.

Going to a picture hanging on the wall, Blaine took it down, revealing a safe in the wall. Quickly entering the combination, he opened it and pulled out a small handgun. He tucked it in the back of his jeans before shutting the safe and replacing the picture. He hurried to his car and drove to the address. It was in a normal neighborhood of houses that all looked the same. Pulling up to the address he’d been given, he didn’t try to hide or sneak up to the door. Striding quickly, he went and opened the door and boldly walked in.

The tall man with the smirk on his face could only be Chandler Smythe. The green eyes were the same, the thin face was all too familiar.

“I’m so glad you could make it so quickly,” Smythe said formally.

“Fuck off. Where’s Kurt?” Blaine said.

“Now, now, Mr. Anderson. Some manners wouldn’t kill you. While a lack of manners might kill you,” he said, chuckling at his own joke.

Blaine just stared at him.

“Okay, fine, we’ll just get right down to business then. Darrel here will be relieving you of any weapons or whatever you may have brought with you,” he said.

Blaine’s lips tightened, knowing they would find and take the gun, but anything that would get him to Kurt faster would be fine.

Soon enough, his car keys, phone, wallet, and gun were all sitting on a table.

“You won’t mind if we take our own precautions,” Smythe said, nodding at the Darrel.

Blaine was handcuffed, gagged, and blindfolded before being led through the house and down some stairs. He had no idea what awaited him, but as long as he was near Kurt, they could figure some way to get out of there.

“Marco, we have another guest for you,” he heard Smythe say.

A whimper came from somewhere to the side of him. He struggled to get closer to the sound, but was jerked back.

“Excellent,” he heard a gravelly voice answer.

“Make sure he stays tied down at all times, he’s a slippery little asshole,” Smythe said.

“You got it, boss,” the man said.

Blaine was quickly and efficiently tied to a chair. He tried to tug against the bonds, but there was no way he was going to get out of this.

“Take the blindfold off,” Smythe commanded.

The cloth was removed and Blaine blinked against the bright light, trying to locate Kurt.

When he finally looked at the person sitting in front of him, his stomach tried to revolt and his body went cold with shock. That person couldn’t be Kurt. Not his Kurt. Not his beautiful boy. Tears streamed down his face, unbidden. Oh god, Kurt, what have they done to you?


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More violence...

Blaine blinked quickly, trying to get past the tears so he could see Kurt clearly. He’d been tortured, there was no other word for it. His face was swollen and his lips were puffy and bleeding. Looking at Kurt’s hands, held gingerly in his lap, made his stomach turn. Several of his fingers were misshapen, obviously broken. There were small bits of blood showing through Kurt’s pajama shirt and pants at various points. Blaine didn’t know what they were from, but he could imagine that the rest of Kurt’s body had been just as thoroughly beaten as his face was.

At that moment, Kurt opened his eyes, Blaine supposed he’d probably been unconscious when he’d whimpered as Blaine was brought in. His eyes were mere slits in his face, the blue-green color dull in his face. As he blearily looked around in fear, he found Marco and began shuddering.

“Hey, Kurt, we brought you a friend, you wanna say hi?” Marco said cheerfully.

Kurt’s eyes quickly found his and he moaned loudly, his eyes trying to go wide.

“Bane,” he murmured painfully. “Bane I sorry.”

Blaine shook his head and wished he could comfort him, but the cloth in his mouth was too large to try and talk around.

“So, Blaine, your friend here refused to tell us if Sebastian had been killed; if his heroin had been tampered with. We’ve been trying to convince him to tell us what your part in all of this was, but as you can see, he hasn’t been very helpful,” Smythe said, walking over and patting Kurt on the cheek, causing him to cry out in pain.

“You refused to rat on your little boyfriend, didn’t you, Kurt?” Smythe continued, walking around behind Kurt. He squatted down until his face was level with Kurt’s over his shoulder. “We think having you here, watching what we do to Kurt might make you want to talk instead,” he said. “Marco, go ahead.”

Marco went over to the table and picked up a long thin instrument. Was that a pickle fork? The large man walked over to Kurt whose eyes were as wide as they could go, tears shining. He was moaning and trying to lean away. How many times had he been through this in the hours he’d been here?

“Come on, Kurt, you know the drill,” Marco said, a pleasant smile on his face. He viciously stuck the fork in Kurt’s thigh, yanking it out and doing it again in the other thigh.

Blaine began fighting in earnest, making as much noise as he could, trying with every ounce of strength he had to break free so he could get to Kurt. When nothing happened, he stared at Smythe, trying to get his attention. When Smythe looked at him, questioningly, he nodded as if answering.

“Hold on, Marco, I think Anderson wants to chat. But stand by in case he needs some more incentive,” Smythe said.

Smythe loosened the gag. “Kurt, I love you, baby,” he got out before Marco’s fist connected with his jaw. Holy shit, that monster of a man must have bricks for hands. And how many of these had Kurt had to suffer through? He looked at Kurt, sympathy and worry in his gaze. Kurt just stared back, tears trailing down his bruised face.

“You don’t get to talk to him. So, Anderson, what was your part in my son’s death? And remember, any lies or hesitation, and Marco will have to take it out on Kurt. Not so pretty anymore, is he?” Smythe mused. “Anyway, tell me what part you played and why it had to be my son.”

Blaine didn’t hesitate. “Your son tried to rape Kurt. He knew Kurt had a history of cutting and after he tried to rape him, he left behind a box of razors and Kurt used them to slit his wrists. He died in my arms and it was only by chance that I was able to revive him,” Blaine said evenly. He couldn’t think about it too much or he might fall apart and Kurt needed him strong. He had no problem telling Smythe all he knew. He didn’t know what the ramifications were going to be, but anything to stop Kurt from further torture was worth a try. He was probably being naïve and they would both end up dead, but he had to try anything he could. “I knew Sebastian had a drug problem and purchased them behind Screamers. I arranged for him to get some heroin that had been laced with other drugs. He shot it up and died,” Blaine said, not specifying that he’d been there almost egging Sebastian on through the last minutes of his life. “That’s everything.”

Smythe stood in front of him, his thin face pale. Suddenly he lashed out, punching Blaine in the face again and again. “My. Son. Was. Not. Gay!” he yelled.

Kurt whimpered and tried to move. “Stay put, Kurt,” Marco warned. Kurt sat back and wept silently as Smythe continued to hit him.

Smythe finally stopped, and paced back and forth, his face full of emotions. “Drugs, it had to be the drugs. Why else would he try to hurt a fag? There’s no other explanation. My son had a drug problem and it affected his mind, drove him crazy. I’ll be back in a moment,” Smythe said, distracted.

Blaine could tell he was more affected by finding out that his son was gay than that Blaine had had him killed. Why was this so hard for parents to accept? He looked back at Kurt who looked relieved for a moment.

“Marco, come with me. Let’s leave the lovebirds to say their final goodbyes,” he said, his voice tired.

Marco followed him. Kurt and Blaine stared at them as they walked out and listened to the sound of them going up the stairs and closing the door.

They finally looked at each other. “I am so sorry, Kurt,” Blaine said.

“Don’t ee,” Kurt murmured, trying to talk through his swollen lips.

“I’ll figure some way to get us out of here, baby, I promise,” Blaine continued.

Kurt just shook his head, every motion looking more painful than the last.

“Don’t lose hope, Kurt,” Blaine said, his heart aching to see his love like this.

He could have sworn Kurt rolled his eyes. Then Blaine’s own eyes widened when Kurt moaned softly as he hefted himself out of the chair. There was something wrong with his foot, it wasn’t quite facing the way it was supposed to. He hobbled toward Blaine, peering through his puffy eyelids.

“Kurt, we don’t know when they’ll be back, you should probably sit down,” he said, though he really just wanted Kurt to be sitting so he wouldn’t risk hurting himself more.

“Know what ‘m doin,” Kurt mumbled. He reached his hand into his waist band and pulled out a small knife. “’arco is a dumbass,” he said, with some version of a contorted smile.

“Kurt! You’re brilliant. Thank god,” Blaine said, proud of his fiancé.

Gingerly, Kurt pulled the blade out and knelt painfully by Blaine’s chair. It took him some time and he was panting and whimpering in pain, but he continued to saw through the thick rope. Finally he freed one of Blaine’s hands and Blaine quickly took the knife from him and began working his way through the rope on his other hand. “Great job, baby. You’re doing so good.”

“’ove you, Bane,” he said.

“I love you, too, Kurt,” Blaine said, quickly working through rope and beginning work on his ankles. Soon he was free and helping Kurt to his feet after he stuck the knife in his pocket. Blaine kissed him lightly and leaned him against the wall before going to the table and picking up the baseball bat. There was a smear of blood across the wooden surface and he refused to think about where it came from. They had to get out of there, first.

“Stay behind me at all times and if I tell you to run, I want you to try your best to run out of here. From what I saw and felt when we were coming down, if we turn left at the top of the stairs, we should be able to get to the front door,” Blaine said quietly, helping Kurt limp toward the door. “Stay strong, baby, we’ll be out of here soon.”

Kurt nodded, trying to pay attention as best as he could. His head was fuzzy and he’d used all of his energy to free Blaine’s arm. There was so much pain, too much to function around. He could only hope Blaine was right, that they’d be out of there soon. He didn’t think he had much strength left in him to survive much more.

“Okay, here we go. You just keep moving when I tell you to, no matter what happens,” Blaine whispered.

He helped Kurt limp up the stairs, both of them standing at the top. Blaine eased the door open. Peeking around the door, he saw the way was clear and helped Kurt through the door.

They crept along the hallway to the left, hoping to see the front door with nobody in front of it.

They weren’t so lucky. Rounding the corner toward the door, they walked straight into Marco and Smythe.

“What the hell!” Smythe yelled out.

Blaine shoved Kurt behind him and swung the bat as Marco came at them. Marco blocked the blow with his arm, but the force of it broke his arm, the loud crack echoing the room. Blaine danced out of the way as Marco tried to punch him with his other arm; Blaine’s boxing experience coming in handy. Kurt watched, amazed and impressed, as Blaine swung the bat repeatedly, never missing a single part of Marco’s body. At one point, Marco grabbed the bat and started to pull it away. Blaine put a stop to it by giving Marco a swift kick to the balls. Marco squealed and fell to his knees. Blaine took the opportunity and began swinging the bat again and again.

Kurt saw Smythe edging towards his phone on a table nearby. Spying a vase close by, Kurt took it, wincing at the pain in his hands and he hurled it at Smythe, hitting him squarely in the face.

Suddenly the door slammed open, Jason and Puck running inside with guns at the ready. A large team of men followed behind and started going through the house. Puck grabbed Smythe, holding his arms behind his back. Jason went to Blaine who was still slamming the bat into Marco’s unconscious body.

“Blaine, Blaine, come on buddy. He’s down for the count,” Jason said quietly, reaching out to try and take the bat.

“Did. You. See. What. He. Did. To. Kurt?” Blaine grunted, accentuating each word with another hit.

“And he’ll get what’s coming to him. Kurt needs you to help him right now, he looks like he’s about to collapse,” Jason said, sending a sympathetic look towards Kurt.

Those were the magic words that got through to Blaine. He dropped the bat and hurried to Kurt, who was slumping against the wall. “Someone call an ambulance,” he commanded. One of the men immediately pulled out his phone.

“And the police,” Jason said.

Blaine looked at him in surprise. “Are you sure you want them to get involved?”

“Oh, absolutely. We just happen to have a taped confession of Mr. Smythe here admitting to having his son murdered because he’s gay,” Jason said with an amused grin.

“What the hell?” Smythe bit out. “I did no such thing!”

“Yeah, well, it wasn’t just you who had Blaine being kept under surveillance. Thanks to all of your recent conversations, we were able to piece together your voice and your confession,” Puck told him.

Blaine was impressed. “Nice work, Puck.”

“All in a day’s work, bro,” Puck said with a grin.

“How did you guys find us by the way?” Blaine asked.

“We put a GPS unit on your car a long time ago. How the hell else are we supposed to keep your dumb ass alive. We had an idea that Smythe might contact you and we were right. I wish you had let us know where you were going.  That might have been helpful in getting us here sooner,” Jason said, glaring at Blaine.

“Well, we’re all alive and that’s the point,” Blaine said, cradling Kurt gently in his arms. Kurt hadn’t said a word since they were in the basement and Blaine was sure he’d reached the end of his strength. He was so proud of him. He’d made it through a complete nightmare, one of many he’d survived, and he’d kept his strength and wits about him. Managing to get that knife without any clear idea of how he might use it to free himself. Kurt suddenly collapsed and Blaine caught him up in his arms.

“Jason, check his breathing,” Blaine said, lifting him gently.

Jason came over and listened to Kurt’s chest and took his pulse. “He’s okay, just unconscious. What the holy hell did they do to him?”

“I’m not sure what all was done, but I know they used the baseball bat, and stabbed him with a fucking pickle fork. His fingers are broken and maybe even one of his ankles. Who knows what else. I just wish the freaking ambulance would get here,” Blaine said.

Jason was staring at him, horrified. “How the hell is he still alive?”

Blaine looked down at Kurt, kissing his forehead. “Strength. He is so much stronger than any of us could ever guess. So much stronger than me. Did you know he stole a knife from that Marco guy and hid it? Then when they brought me in and left the room, Kurt got up and managed to cut through the ropes holding me. He got through that rope with broken fingers. I can’t even imagine the pain he must have been in, that he’s still in. Where is the damn ambulance?”

“Should be here in less than five more minutes, sir,” the man who called reported.

“Thanks,” Blaine said, truly appreciative.

In the remaining time, Puck took Smythe out of the room and Jason told him what the story would be once the police got there. Blaine listened closely, knowing this was vital to his future.

The ambulance got there followed by the police. Chaos ensued for several minutes as Jason and Puck handled the telling of the story. Kurt was taken away immediately. Blaine wanted to go with him, but the police insisted on getting his side of the events first. Marco was also taken away in an ambulance, though there wasn’t much hope that he would survive. Nobody admitted to who had beaten him, the bat mysteriously having disappeared. The police listened to the tape and didn’t hesitate to take Smythe into custody. They left the car door open for a moment and Blaine slid over to stare Smythe in the eyes.

“This is over. Here and now. You got your revenge. Unless you want the rest of your family involved in this, then it ends here and now,” Blaine hissed, his golden eyes glowing with hate.

Smythe stared at him for a moment before nodding slowly. “It’s over.”

Blaine nodded back and walked away. He hurried through his report and signed the necessary forms before rushing to his car. He’d found his wallet, phone, gun, and keys right where they’d been left, thankfully. Speeding through town, he made it to the hospital in record time.

Dashing through the doors to the desk, he demanded to know where Kurt was. He was shown back to a room, but was told to remain in the hall.

Minutes later, a doctor came up to him.

“Are you with Mr. Hummel?”

“Yes, he’s my fiancé,” Blaine answered. The doctor didn’t even blink an eye and once again, Blaine was grateful to live in New York.

“Mr. Hummel is in very poor condition. I understand he was the victim of a kidnapping?”

“Yes. He was kept in a basement and tortured for at least eight hours, maybe more,” Blaine said, his stomach turning.

“Tortured is definitely the right way to put it. Let’s have a seat,” the doctor said, pointing to nearby chairs.

They sat, Blaine nervous at what he was about to hear.

“Mr. Hummel has sustained severe injuries. He has four broken fingers, a broken wrist, ribs, ankle, and several toes, and a broken cheekbone. He has multiple stab wounds, from what we have no idea,” the doctor said.

“Pickle fork,” Blaine whispered.

“A pickle fork? Dear god. It makes sense though. He was stabbed all over his body, but those just need simple stitches and cleaning. He needs surgery because his spleen was ruptured and he may have internal bleeding from other injuries from some blunt object,” the doctor continued.

“Bat,” Blaine said.

“How the hell is that boy still alive,” the doctor muttered.

“I don’t know,” Blaine said honestly.

“Anyway, on top of that, he’s a bit dehydrated. His mouth is burned, his tongue is actually blistered. Any idea how that happened?” Blaine shook his head. “Well, we’ll get him fixed up, but he has a long road of recovery ahead. Physical therapy and such. He’s also going to be dealing with the emotional aspect of it. PTSD and that sort of thing. We’re going to be keeping him heavily sedated, even after the surgery. Just for a few days until the majority of his pain eases up.”

“Can I see him?” Blaine asked, tears falling down his face. “Please?”

The doctor nodded and patted him on the knee. “He lived through the beating. Now is the easy part, though it’ll take the longest time. Come on, let’s get you in to see him. Just for a minute though, we need to prep him for surgery.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Blaine said sincerely, shaking the man’s hand.

He walked into Kurt’s room. He looked so tiny and helpless, his face pale beneath the swelling and bruises. It made him flash back to the day he tried to kill himself. This time though his entire body was an injury. How the hell had his tongue and mouth been burned? He leaned down to lightly kiss Kurt on the forehead, there was really nowhere else to kiss him that wouldn’t cause him pain. Needing to see what damage had been done, he pulled the blanket down and lifted up the hospital gown. He moaned aloud at the bruises and stab wounds coloring Kurt all over his torso and legs. Blaine had to swallow back the bile that was rising in his throat. He was more glad than ever that he got to beat the crap out of Marco. He prayed the man would die.

“I love you, Kurt Hummel. You get through this surgery and come back to me, you got it? I love you so much,” Blaine whispered next to his ear, his voice breaking on the words.

“Uh you too,” Kurt mumbled.

Blaine smiled. His Kurt was in there and hopefully would make it out of this in one piece. He would be there every step of the way.

 


	30. Chapter 30

Blaine blinked slowly, desperate to keep his eyes on Kurt’s face. He’d been sitting in the same chair for hours since Kurt had gotten out of surgery. He’d allowed a doc to check him out, though he refused to leave the room to do it. Blaine just had bruises and a broken nose. It was a clean break that didn’t need to be set, so he was allowed to remain next to Kurt. Now he sat here, wishing Kurt would wake up and yet not wanting him to. The more healing sleep he got, the better he was likely to feel when he did wake up.

He kept up the tracing of his fingers on Kurt’s forearm, the one place it seemed safe to touch him. He was covered in so many bandages, plaster, and such that it was daunting to even want to touch him, but Blaine couldn’t resist. He needed the reassurance of Kurt alive under his fingers.

Jason and Puck had brought him dinner and he’d eaten as much as he could handle, which wasn’t much. But he knew he had to stay strong for Kurt, so he’d taken a few more bites. After that, he’d sent the guys home with hugs and thanks for their help. Jason had offered to stay with him, but he’d refused. He sympathized for his friend. Jason had decided to tell Colton the truth about his past. From very recent experience, Blaine knew it wasn’t going to be an easy conversation.

Blaine moved his chair closer to Kurt and settled his hand around the pulse in Kurt’s wrist. Feeling that tiny flutter against his fingers eased him and he leaned his head back to try and sleep.

. . . . .

Jason walked to his dorm, his stomach full of butterflies. He was more nervous now than when they’d raided Smythe’s house where they could have potentially died. But no, facing his tiny boyfriend was more daunting than facing guns. It was time to tell the truth. He’d never lied to Colton, but leaving out important details was just as bad as lying. Knowing what had happened with Blaine and Kurt, he could only hope that this wouldn’t lead to a split. Or to Colton going to the cops as he’d wanted to do when he’d suspected Blaine of killing Sebastian. Jason paused and closed his eyes. God, he was going to have to tell Colton he’d known about what Blaine did, wasn’t he? Shit. This was not going to go well. Come on, he told himself, you’ve been on real battle lines in real wars, this conversation wasn’t even physically dangerous. Yeah right, he argued. This was even more dangerous. A broken heart would never completely heal.

Letting himself into his room, he saw that Colton was snuggled up in their bed. They had taken to sleeping in Jason’s bed since Jason had added a padded bench at the end of the bed which helped add another foot or so for his long frame to stretch out on.

Stripping his coat and shoes, he turned on the lamp on Colton’s side of the room and sat down next to his boyfriend.

“Colton? Col, you awake?” Jason said, gently rubbing his arm.

“Jason?” Colton asked sleepily, then sat up. “You’re home? Where the hell have you been? I’ve been trying to call you all day. You left so suddenly this morning, I didn’t know what to think,” he said, coming awake quickly.

Jason pulled him into a hug, cherishing his safe, warm body, knowing he was safe. Regardless of what was going to happen between them, Colton was safe. Smythe’s vendetta was over, there wouldn’t be any more loved ones hurt.

“I’m sorry, love,” Jason murmured against Colton’s sleep mussed hair. “Can we talk?”

Colton looked up at him, his crystal blue eyes concerned. “Of course, are you okay?”

“I am,” Jason assured him.

Colton sat up, sitting cross legged and Jason sat in front of him, mirroring his position.

“I am going to explain what happened today, but first there are some things I need to tell you about my past,” Jason began quietly. “I just ask that you let me get it all out and then I promise to answer all of your questions.”

“Okay,” Colton said, taking Jason’s hand, worried at the look on his face.

Jason told Colton all about entering the military after high school and being drafted into the Black Ops after only a year in the field. He was honest and told Colton that he was trained to kill, at which point Colton dropped his hand and went deathly pale. Sharing how it turned his stomach and he ended up getting out after his four years was up, Colton seemed to breathe a little easier. But then he had to tell how he went into business with Blaine’s dad, and what he did for the man.

“Then I ended up here because I wanted to go to school and keeping an eye on Blaine seemed easy enough. So that’s what I’ve been doing the last two years,” Jason said quietly.

“Glorified babysitter, huh?” Colton joked weakly.

“Something like that,” Jason replied.

“So what happened today?” Colton asked. Jason was surprised he wasn’t yelling or running away yet. Maybe things could be okay.

“Kurt was kidnapped last night by Sebastian’s father,” Jason said. Colton gasped and started talking quickly. Jason held up his hand. “We got him back. He is in the hospital with some pretty severe injuries, but he will be alright. Blaine requested the best guy they had and that guy was me. I called in my best guy who happens to be Puck.” At Colton’s dubious expression, Jason grinned. “Yeah, Puck. He has many layers. Anyway, we managed to find Kurt and Blaine and get everything taken care of. Smythe is going to jail, probably forever. Everything is going to be okay now. I hope,” Jason added, looking at Colton.

The small man was silent for a long moment. “So the stories about all your brothers and sisters?”

“All true. Everything I told you about myself was true. I just held back some of the more dangerous details. I couldn’t tell you, Colton, not without putting you in danger. But I’m pulling out of it all,” he said, surprising himself. He’d made the decision just now and it felt right and good. “I’m not going to work for the Anderson’s anymore. I just want to be a regular college guy with a sweet and wonderful boyfriend,” he said with a hopeful smile.

“How old are you?” Colton asked.

“Twenty five,” Jason admitted, smiling ruefully.

“I thought you were twenty this whole time, same as Blaine. Who knew I was dating such an old man,” Colton joked, a tight smile on his face.

“Well, this just means I can buy us all the alcohol we want and not get in trouble,” Jason offered.

“True,” Colton murmured, staring down at the bed.

“Colton, love, please know that I didn’t want to keep any of this from you. My job was very dangerous and I was taking enough of a risk just being with you.”

“Then why were you?” Colton asked, his blue eyes boring into Jason’s.

“Because I had to,” Jason answered simply.

“Good answer,” Colton said and crawled across the bed and into Jason’s lap. He wrapped his arms around Jason’s neck and kissed him gently. “No more secrets?”

Jason felt like his heart might explode. “No more secrets.”

They kissed for a long moment, Jason with a touch of desperation, grateful he hadn’t lost this man.

“Colton, I need to know something,” Jason finally said, though he hated to pull the smaller man away from him.

“What?” Colton said, leaning forward and peppering Jason’s jaw with kisses.

“I knew about what Blaine did to Sebastian. When you suspected him, I knew the truth. I couldn’t let you go to the authorities because it was part of my job to protect Blaine. Now that you know everything, I have to know. Are you going to turn us in?” Jason asked.

Colton stared at him. “Of course not.”

“But, why? Before you were so sure,” Jason started.

Colton put his hand on Jason’s mouth. “I didn’t know the whole situation. I wanted to keep us safe, just like you did. Now that I know the entire story, I know there is no need to bring in officials. We are all safer just leaving things the way they are.”

Jason clasped him close to his chest. “I love you so damn much, Col,” he muttered.

“I love you too, Jason,” Colton replied.

Jason slanted his lips against Colton’s, thrusting his tongue inside to taste the wondrous flavor that was Colton. He moaned into his mouth, as their tongues dueled for control. Soon they were panting against each other, their hands roaming over shoulders, chests, stomachs, their intentions becoming very clear.

“Col,” Jason said against his lips.

“Mm?” Colton responded.

“I want to bottom,” he announced hesitantly.

Colton leaned away, surprise on his face. Colton had always bottomed, it was what he preferred and Jason certainly enjoyed topping. “Why?”

“I, it, I think it would make me feel more yours, if that makes sense,” Jason whispered, his brown eyes vulnerable in the dim light.

“I would love that,” Colton said softly, stroking his hand down Jason’s scruffy cheek.

“Okay,” Jason said, suddenly nervous. He’d let Colton finger him before but they’d only gotten to two fingers and he knew that this would require more, plus Colton himself. But he knew the fingers had felt incredible, so he was a mess of excitement and nerves.

“I won’t hurt you, Jas,” Colton assured him. He could tell Jason was a bit scared so he made a quick decision. “Come on,” he said, getting off the bed and tugging Jason with him.

Jason followed and they went to the bathroom. Colton started the shower and slowly stripped Jason’s clothes, before tugging his own off. They traded sweet, lingering kisses, before climbing into the hot water. Jason moaned in pleasure as the jetting water soothed his knotted muscles. Colton grabbed Jason’s body wash, poured it into his hands and lathered them up. He knelt and began rubbing his hands up and down Jason’s legs, massaging and washing at the same time. Taking his time, he made sure to loosen tight muscles as well as tantalizing Jason with soft kisses and touches. He got more body wash and moved up his thighs, taking his half hard cock in his hands. His hands were slick with the soap and he stroked Jason until he was rigid in his hands. Jason was moaning, still standing with his back to the water which blocked it from hitting Colton in the face. Just as Jason began tilting his hips into the motion Colton had started, Colton moved to his hips, licking and nipping before washing him. Continuing the torture up his toned abs and chest, he was about to start on Jason’s arms, when he was grabbed roughly. Jason pulled him close and slammed their mouths together, moaning at the feel of Colton’s tongue against his.

“God, I want you so bad,” Jason muttered.

“Me too,” Colton panted. Washing Jason had gotten him completely hard. He felt powerful in a way, knowing he’d turned his big strong man into this creature who was desperate and needing to be with him. “Soon,” he promised. “Let me finish.”

He renewed the soap and had Jason kneel in front of him. Colton moved behind him and slowly massaged his shoulders and back, working out the knots and tight spots. Jason moaned in pleasure, feeling relaxed for the first time all day. Grabbing the shampoo, Colton lathered Jason’s hair, loving the soft moans that were coming from deep in his throat. Rinsing it, he quickly conditioned it and rinsed that out. Then he just let his hands run all over his body. Urging Jason to stand, Colton stood in front of him again, stroking down his arms, his chest, lightly scraping his nails over his nipples, rinsing off the last of the soap suds, enjoying the guttural moan that came with the motions.

“How are you feeling now?” Colton asked, standing on his toes to whisper in Jason’s ear.

“More relaxed than I’ve ever felt and yet so freaking horny, I might die,” Jason whispered back, his voice strained.

Colton couldn’t help the giggle that escaped him. “Let’s go to bed,” he said, reaching down to turn the water off.

“What about you?” Jason asked, his eyes slightly glazed.

“I showered before bed,” Colton said, grabbing a towel.

They took turns drying each other off before brushing their teeth, Jason grinding into Colton’s ass as they always did at bedtime.

Laughter followed them from the bedroom to the bed, where Colton pushed Jason down before crawling on top of him.

“You know,” he said between nips and licks on Jason’s neck. “You being a mysterious soldier type guy is really kind of hot.”

“Really,” Jason panted, running his hands down Colton’s back to cup his soft, round ass.

“Uh huh. Maybe one of these times you can, uh, take control of me. I could be the bad guy and you could take me down,” Colton said, looking up and waggling his eyebrows.

Jason chuckled. “That sounds like a good idea. Now kiss me,” he demanded in a firm voice.

Colton felt a shudder run throughout his entire body at the sound. “Holy fuck, Jason. I just about came hearing you talk like that.”

“I said kiss me,” Jason commanded, jerking Colton’s head to his.

Colton cried out and kissed him passionately, his hot tongue plunging into fuck against Jason’s. Jason dominated his mouth, sucking on his lips, his tongue, exploring the roof of his mouth and teeth. When he pulled back, he moaned at the sight of Colton’s red, spit shiny lips.

“I love your mouth,” he muttered.

“Ditto,” Colton said, dipping down to kiss him again. He left his lips and began trailing kisses down Jason’s neck to his chest, biting lightly at his nipples. Licking his way to Jason’s straining cock, Colton moaned, not sure how much more he could take. The foreplay was about to make him come and there was still more to come.

He grabbed Jason’s cock in his hand, barely able to close his hand around his thick length. Jason’s cock was something people only dreamed about and Colton enjoyed every long inch of it. Abruptly, he deep throated it, opening the back of his throat, thankful he didn’t have much of a gag reflex.

Jason bucked against him, his back arching off the bed. “Holy shit, Col,” he gasped. “Don’t do too much or I won’t last.”

Colton gave a good long suck, hollowing his cheeks before sliding off his cock, making a loud popping sound.

“You ready, Jas?” he asked, grabbing the lube from the table.

“So ready, love,” he moaned.

Colton lubed his fingers and gently slid one inside Jason, only going to the first knuckle.  As Jason cried out and adjusted to the invasion, Colton licked along Jason’s cock, lapping at the pre-come that had gathered at its tip. Slowly, he slid his finger all the way, crooking it just so, knowing exactly where Jason’s prostate was. He grinned as Jason’s eyes rolled back and he moaned deep in his throat. He loved Jason’s responsiveness. As he was enjoying the pressure against his prostate, Colton slid another finger deep inside him. Jason sighed at the sensation of two fingers filling him.

“Oh god, Colton, more, please,” he whimpered.

“I’ve got you, sweetie,” Colton said, licking another stripe down Jason’s cock as he began moving his fingers in a slow rhythm, hitting his prostate each time.

“Colton, I’m gonna come,” Jason warned.

Colton realized how close he was and pushed a third finger inside him, groaning at how tight Jason was.

“Aw fuck,” Jason cried out. “Colton, please, I need you. Please fuck me.”

“On your knees, big boy,” Colton said lightly, taking his fingers out, enjoying Jason’s whimper at the loss. He knew with the height difference, doing it doggie style would be the best way to do this.

Jason eagerly flipped over, raising his ass in the air. Colton moaned at the sight of Jason’s ass ready for him.

“Okay, Jas, I’m going to go slow. If you need me to stop, just say so, okay?” Colton said, lubing up his cock.

“Uh huh,” Jason whimpered, pushing his ass back, seeking out Colton’s body.

Colton sat up on his knees as far as he could and lined up his cock and pushed the tip inside Jason.

“Aaaaagggg,” Jason cried out. “Oh god, more, Colton, please more.”

Jason was well prepared so Colton slid inside him, slowly, but all the way until he could feel his balls rubbing against Jason’s.

“Jason, holy shit, you are tight,” Colton bit out, straining to keep his body under control.

“You feel so good, Col. I feel so full, it’s amazing,” Jason managed to say before bucking his ass back against Colton.

Colton took the hint and began thrusting slowly, an easy rhythm so Jason could adjust to the feel of it. Jason adjusted quickly and began thrusting back against Colton. He took the hint and grabbed Jason’s hips, driving into him until they were both almost sobbing with need. Colton reached around Jason’s hips and grabbed his cock. His hand was still lubed and Jason’s cock slid easily through his hand. Three solid strokes and Jason was coming with a half moan, half scream of release. Colton thrust a couple more times, loving the feeling of Jason pulsing around him. Soon he was keening as he came deep inside Jason, more satisfied than he’d ever been. Jason had wanted to be marked and yet Colton felt as if he were the one who now belonged to Jason even more.

After a few moments, he gently pulled out and they both collapsed on the bed.

Jason gathered him close, murmuring words of love and adoration into his ear. Colton had never felt so treasured.

“I love you, Col,” Jason said.

“I love you, too, Jason,” he whispered.

Jason smiled against his hair. He could not have hoped for more when he knew he’d have to tell Colton the truth. Now everything was out in the open and Jason belonged to Colton in a new and permanent way. Everything was perfect.

. . . . .

Blaine woke up when the nurse came in to check on Kurt.

“How is he?” Blaine asked sleepily.

The nurse, Kathy, her name badge said, smiled gently at him. “His vitals are good, he is a strong one. He’s getting the rest he needs to get better.”

“Good, thank you,” Blaine said, staring at Kurt lovingly.

“You really love him, don’t you?” Kathy asked.

“More than anything in this world,” Blaine responded honestly.

“He is a lucky man,” she said, smiling at him.

“I’m the lucky one. He chose me,” Blaine said.

“Then you both are blessed. Not everyone in this world is able to find such a beautiful love,” Kathy said. She checked a few more stats on the machines surrounding Kurt and walked out.

Blaine gave her words some thought. He really was blessed. Once Kurt was well, he would protect him better, cherish him and love him all the days of his life.

Kurt gave a tiny moan, his head moving as if he were having a bad dream. Blaine stood and brushed his lips against Kurt’s forehead and bruised face.

“You’re safe, baby. I’m here. Sleep sweet, my love,” Blaine whispered.

Out of the blue, his mouth opened and he began to sing softly next to Kurt’s ear.

 

_When you try your best, but you don't succeed_

_When you get what you want, but not what you need_

_When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep_

_Stuck in reverse…_

_And the tears come streaming down your face_

_When you lose something you can't replace_

_When you love someone, but it goes to waste_

_Could it be worse?_

_Lights will guide you home_

_And ignite your bones_

_And I will try to fix you_

He sang the words as a promise. He would be here next to Kurt every step of the way. During his recovery, during his mental and spiritual healing. Blaine would do whatever it took to fix him and give him the safe, loving life he deserved.

_And high up above or down below_

_When you're too in love to let it go_

_But if you never try you'll never know_

_Just what you're worth_

Those words struck a chord in Blaine. He’d never known what he was worth until he’d met Kurt. He’d never known that he could be kind or loving or needed. Kurt had shown him a side of himself that he hadn’t known existed. With Kurt, he was worth something.

_Lights will guide you home_

_And ignite your bones_

_And I will try to fix you_

_Tears stream down on your face_

_When you lose something you cannot replace_

_Tears stream down on your face_

_And I..._

Blaine let the tears fall, sliding down his cheeks onto Kurt’s. He loved this man so desperately. As he sang, he turned it into a prayer for Kurt’s healing, for forgiveness for putting Kurt in danger.

_Tears stream down on your face_

_I promise you I will learn from my mistakes_

_Tears stream down on your face_

_And I..._

_Lights will guide you home_

_And ignite your bones_

_And I will try to fix you_

 

“I will fix you, Kurt. I promise. I will never leave you or get you hurt again, I swear it. Please baby, get stronger and come back to me,” Blaine pleaded. He kissed Kurt’s swollen lips lightly before dabbing the tears off both of their faces.

Going back to his chair and placing his hand back on Kurt’s wrist so he could feel his pulse, he closed his eyes and fell asleep. For once, hope was warm in his chest. Kurt was going to be okay.

 

. . . . . .

**“Fix You” by Coldplay**


	31. Chapter 31

The next few days passed in a blur. Blaine marked the passing of time by the meals Jason and Colton brought him, the nurses and doctors coming in to check on Kurt, and the few hours of sleep he managed to fit in here and there. Only once did he leave and that was to run to a nearby hotel and shower since Jason told him he was starting to petrify in his dirty clothes. He didn’t want Kurt to wake and be grossed out, so he cleaned up and just threw the clothes he was wearing in the trash.

On the third day, the doctor stopped the sedation, saying it was time for Kurt to wake up and start working towards movement and healing. Blaine refused to leave his side from then on. Kurt could wake up at any moment and there was no way Blaine was going to miss seeing his eyes after so many days of staring at him unconscious.

Kurt was doing well, his bruises were already changing from the angry purples and blues to greens and yellows. Blaine knew Kurt would not want to see himself like this, so he’d have to keep him distracted and not let him see a mirror until he could handle the shock.

Blaine was humming mindlessly, stroking Kurt’s arm, when he saw his head twitch.

“Kurt?” he said. “Baby, are you waking up finally?”

“Mm,” Kurt moaned. “Hurts.”

Blaine pushed the button for the nurse and told her Kurt was waking up.

“I know, baby. You were pretty badly injured and had to have surgery. There is going to be a lot of pain. Just try to stay still for now, okay?”

“’kay,” he muttered. “Blaine?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“Love you,” Kurt murmured, his eyelids fluttering.

“I love you, too, baby. Can you look at me so I can see those gorgeous eyes of yours?” Blaine encouraged.

“Mm,” Kurt moaned and blinked slowly. Finally his eyes opened, though not fully because of the swelling that still surrounded his face. He looked at Blaine and Blaine felt like crying and cheering all at the same time.

“I’ve missed those eyes,” Blaine said, stroking Kurt’s arm gently.

“How long’s it been?” Kurt asked, his speech still garbled.

“You’ve been out for almost three days now. The doctor’s wanted you to rest instead of having to feel the pain,” Blaine explained, trying to keep things simple.

“It hurts, though,” Kurt said.

“What hurts the most?” Blaine asked.

“Belly the worst. But I hurt all over,” Kurt said, looking at him, his eyes slightly glazed.

“Your belly hurts because you had to have surgery. Everything else hurts because you got the crap beat out of you,” Blaine said honestly.

“Marco,” Kurt whispered, his eyes wide.

“Marco didn’t make it, Kurt. He passed away yesterday,” Blaine said, hoping the news would ease his mind. Thanks to Blaine and the bat, Marco had died from severe internal hemorrhaging. They’d tried several surgeries from what he’d heard, but it was too little too late. He wasn’t sorry. Looking at his fiancé and knowing the pain he was experiencing, he wished he could kill Marco all over again.

“Good,” Kurt muttered. “He was asshole.”

Blaine grinned. “He was asshole.” Kurt like this was pretty adorable.

“My mouth hurts, Blaine,” he whined. “Hurts to talk.”

“Your tongue and mouth got burned somehow, baby. You have blisters all over your mouth. Can you remember what happened?” Blaine had been curious of what could cause that kind of burn and yet part of him didn’t want to know.

“Chili sauce,” Kurt murmured, a tear trickling down his cheek.

“Chili sauce? What do you mean, baby?” Blaine asked, wiping the single tear away.

“Ghost chili sauce,” he said. “Marco said it was hottest chili in the world. Put it on my tongue and made me keep it in my mouth then spit it out. Did it a lot. He liked to watch my eyes water and my nose run. It hurt, Blaine.”

Blaine stared at him in shock, unable to fathom the sadistic nature of man. “Oh, baby, I am so sorry. The doctors have been coating your mouth with Lidocaine to numb it. We’ll have the nurse give you some more.”

“’kay. Thanks Blaine,” Kurt said, his eyes fluttering closed, too exhausted to keep talking.

The nurse came in and gave him pain medicine, saying that when he was able to be a bit more alert, they’d give him a pain pump. She also swabbed his tongue with the numbing agent and Kurt looked relieved immediately. She adjust his blankets and pillows and left quietly.

Blaine was sure Kurt was asleep and went back to rubbing his wrist.

“Blaine?”

Blaine jumped, his heart pounding. Smiling, he squeezed his wrist softly. “Yeah, baby?”

“You sing to me? Fixing song?” he asked sleepily.

Blaine grinned, pleased. “Yes, baby, I sang to you. The Coldplay song, ‘Fix You’. You remember?”

“Uh huh. Thought it was a dream. It was pretty, Blaine. Thank you,” Kurt said, a small smile on his swollen face.

“You are welcome, love. Would you like another song?” he offered. He would do anything to ease Kurt.

“Yes, please,” he whispered.

“Any requests?” Blaine asked.

“Something happy. Love stuff,” Kurt stuff. “Cause I love you.”

“I love you, too. Okay, let me think for a minute,” Blaine said. Then he smiled and began singing in a soft voice, pausing every so often to plant soft kisses across Kurt’s face. His small smile made it all worth it.

_Well you've done done me and you bet I felt it_

_I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted_

_I fell right through the cracks_

_and now I'm trying to get back_

_Before the cool done run out_

_I'll be giving it my bestest_

_Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention_

_I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some_

_I won't hesitate no more, no more_

_It cannot wait, I'm yours_

_Well open up your mind and see like me_

_Open up your plans and damn you're free_

_Look into your heart and you'll find love love love love_

_Listen to the music of the moment people dance and sing, we're just one big family_

_It's our God-forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved loved_

_So I won't hesitate no more, no more_

_It cannot wait I'm sure_

_There's no need to complicate_

_Our time is short_

_This is our fate, I'm yours_

_Do you want to, come on, scootch over closer dear_

_And I will nibble your ear_

_I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror_

_And bending over backwards just to try to see it clearer_

_But my breath fogged up the glass_

_And so I drew a new face and I laughed_

_I guess what I'll be saying is there ain't no better reason_

_To rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons_

_It's what we aim to do_

_Our name is our virtue_

_But I won't hesitate no more, no more_

_It cannot wait, I'm yours_

_Well open up your mind and see like me_

_Open up your plans and damn you're free_

_Look into your heart and you'll find that the sky is yours_

_so please don't, please don't, please don't._

_There's no need to complicate_

_'cause our time is short_

_This oh, this oh, this is our fate, I'm yours_

 

“Thank you, Blaine. I’m yours too,” Kurt murmured, as his blinks became slower.

“Good to know,” Blaine smiled.

“Love Blaine,” he slurred.

“I love you, too, baby. Sleep now,” Blaine said, brushing his hair back.

“Be here, wake up?” he mumbled.

“I’ll be here. No worries. Sleep sweet, my love,” he assured him with a soft kiss.

. . . . .

“How is he?” Jason asked. He and Colton had brought Blaine dinner again along with a change of clothes. Blaine had quickly scrubbed up in the bathroom in Kurt’s room and changed.

“He’s doing really good. They are taking him off sedation and he already woke up for a little while earlier. He’s so cute when he’s all loopy. I just hate that he’s in so much pain,” Blaine said, giving Kurt a fond smile.

“I can’t even imagine,” Colton said, his eyes wide.

“Did you know that asshole Marco put freakin’ ghost chili sauce on his tongue? Do you know what ghost chili’s are?” Blaine asked.

“Uh, yeah, those are the hottest peppers known to man. And Kurt had to have that shit in his mouth?” Jason asked, incredulous.

“Yeah, he had to hold it in his mouth and then they had him spit it out. I guess I’m glad he didn’t have to swallow it. Who knows what that would have done to his insides. As it was, he had to have his spleen taken out and several blood vessels fixed to stop the internal bleeding,” Blaine relayed.

“Whatever happened to Marco?” Colton asked.

“Dead,” Blaine said, a grim smile on his face.

“I can’t say I’m sorry to hear that,” Jason said.

“Same here. And with Smythe in jail, everyone is safe, right? This is all over?” Colton asked Blaine.

“Yeah, it’s all over. Except for Kurt’s healing. That will take quite a while, but he’ll get there. He’s strong,” Blaine said.

After the two left, Blaine sat there thinking. All of this, all of it, was his fault. He’d killed Sebastian. He’d set everything up. He’d moved Kurt into the same apartment as him. Kurt was kidnapped to pay back Blaine for what he did to Sebastian. If he’d let that asshole live, none of this would have happened. If he’d just called the cops and let them handle it, maybe Kurt would be fine right now. They could be in their dorm room laughing or watching TV or arguing over watching baseball or Project Runway. Or they could be making love. But here they were instead, Kurt unconscious, his body in so much pain he couldn’t stand to be awake for more than a few minutes at a time. All because Blaine wanted revenge. It was too much suddenly, and he broke down, bending over and burying his face in his hands. His shoulders shook with the force of his sobs. He had done this to Kurt. He may as well have swung the bat and stabbed him with the pickle fork. This was all his doing. His anger, his self-righteous attitude, his idea that he could take vengeance on someone with no regard to how it would affect others; all of that was responsible for the man he loved being in pain. He was broken, his body literally broken and bleeding. A loud sob escaped him and he bit his lip until he tasted blood, not wanting Kurt to wake up.

“Blaine?” Kurt’s quiet voice interrupted him.

Blaine immediately quit crying and wiped his face.

“Yeah, baby?” he asked, his voice quavering.

“Why are you crying?” Kurt asked, his eyes bright and as clear as he’d seen them since the kidnapping.

“I’m not,” Blaine started.

Kurt tried to glare at him, but the movement it took to make the expression pained him and he whimpered. “Don’t lie to me, Blaine. I may be hurt, but I’m not stupid.”

“It’s just… God, Kurt, I am so sorry for all of this. This is all my fault. If I had left Sebastian alone, if I had let the authorities handle what happened to you, then none of this would have happened. Smythe would have had no reason to come at either of us. But I just had to take matters into my own hands and get back at Sebastian. And now you are paying the price for it. I’m so sorry, baby,” he said, the tears beginning to fall again. He leaned his head on Kurt’s bed, near his hand, sobbing out his guilt and heart break.

“Blaine, sweetie, don’t cry,” Kurt said, awkwardly patting Blaine’s head with his bandaged hand. “I don’t blame you. You did what you did to protect me, to avenge me, and I am so honored that you love me enough to do that. Please don’t cry,” he begged.

“Kurt, please just forgive me if you can. I love you so much. I would never have done any of this if I had known what would come of it,” Blaine cried.

“Of course I forgive you. There is nothing to forgive. Blaine, I hurt,” he moaned.

Blaine reached over and grabbed the small pump the nurse had told him how to work. He settled it in Kurt’s hand, putting his uninjured thumb over the small button.

“Just press this when it hurts. You can push it once every ten minutes. So just give it a press and it’ll inject pain medicine into your IV,” Blaine said.

Kurt pressed it immediately. Within a minute, his pained expression was easing.

“Blaine?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“Sing to me again? The doctor said that singing to me helps me heal faster,” Kurt said, a silly smile playing on his lips.

“Did he now? That’s funny because I’ve been awake and conscious during the doctor’s visits and you’ve been unconscious,” Blaine teased back.

“It was when you, um, when you, it was a psychic visit,” Kurt said. “Now sing to me. A silly song, cause you are silly,” Kurt said, his eyes easing closed again.

“Fine,” Blaine said. He thought of the perfect song and began singing.

 

_I feel like a loser_

_I feel like I'm lost_

_I feel like I'm not so sure if I feel anything at all_

_But believe me, I'm not helpless I just_

_Need someone to love_

_So my situation's rough_

_But that just makes me a dumb human_

_Like you_

Kurt’s small giggles kept him going, spurred him to sing louder. He saw Kurt’s uninjured foot bobbing to the beat of the song and it made him grin.

_I feel like a shortstop_

_Along third base_

_I may just help you but I still don't like your face_

_But believe me, I'm not hostile I just_

_Want to hear you laugh_

_When I'm sarcastic like that_

_But that just makes me a dumb human_

_Like you_

_Why_

_Do I have this incredible need to stand up_

_And say "Please, pay attention?"_

_It's the last thing that I need_

_To make myself seen_

_Well, that ain't my intention_

_No_

_I feel like an artist_

_Who's lost his touch_

_He likes himself in his art, but not his art too much_

_But believe me, I've got something_

_I just don't know how to say_

_That I'm just fine with the way_

_With the way that I'm moving_

_But that just makes me a dumb human_

_That just makes me_

_That makes me a human like_

_You_

“That song suits you, Blaine,” Kurt slurred.

“What do you mean?” Blaine asked, grinning.

“You’re a dumb human,” Kurt said, sticking his tongue out at Blaine.

“I can’t argue with that,” Blaine said and kissed him softly on the cheek.

 

. . . . .

 

**“I’m Yours” by Jason Mraz**

**“Human” by Darren Criss (a personal favorite**


	32. Chapter 32

A week later, Kurt was discharged from the hospital. He was relegated to a wheelchair due to his hands being too bandaged to handle crutches. Kurt didn’t care, he just wanted out of the damn hospital. He bounced up and down in the wheelchair as the doctor went over his medications and instructions with Blaine.

Blaine reached out and put his hand on Kurt’s shoulder and he relaxed a little. Blaine would get him out of here as soon as he could, he knew that. He was just so sick of the white walls and the nurses and physical therapists. Now those people were sadistic. The stretches and exercises they had him doing were enough to make anyone want a trip to the mental ward. As it was Juliet had been visiting and was insisting on seeing him every other day again. Mentally, Kurt felt fine. He wasn’t having any flashbacks or post traumatic symptoms, but he would go along with the program if it meant they’d all leave him alone.

The day was sunny and Kurt could not wait to feel to feel the warmth on his face, even if it was going to be freezing out there. Blaine had him bundled up like a child which Kurt had enjoyed. Though Blaine had looked like he might have a heart attack during the process, he was so worried about hurting Kurt. But with the thick plaster and bandaging, Kurt knew he would be fine. The only part that still really hurt was the incision from his surgery. But even that was easing slowly.

Finally, Kurt signed the release papers as best as he could with only three fingers on his right hand capable of holding a pen. Then Blaine was pushing him down the hall and out the front doors.

Kurt couldn’t hold back a whoop of joy, throwing his arms out wide as the sun hit him. Blaine chuckled behind him.

“You’re not happy about leaving, are you?” he said, pushing the wheelchair toward his car.

“I am ecstatic. If I’d had to stay in there one more day, I might have gone postal,” Kurt said, keeping his eyes closed trying to feel each ray of the sun. He didn’t even care that he wasn’t wearing sunscreen. Life was good right now.

Blaine helped him maneuver out of the chair and into the car. It was a relatively painless operation, though Blaine clenched his teeth and hissed every time Kurt made any sort of noise. Poor Blaine, Kurt thought, he might need some tranquilizers if he didn’t start to relax soon. Blaine was still blaming himself, though Kurt had told him he forgave him and didn’t hold him at fault. But he was the hero type and as such, he had to heap the guilt on himself. He’d gone out of his way to take care of Kurt down to the smallest and most embarrassing details. The sponge bath had been lovely, but helping him up and down from the toilet had made him want to scream with embarrassment. Never once did Blaine make him feel bad or humiliated, though, and Kurt loved him more every single time he helped.

The car ride to their apartment was quiet. Kurt rested his head back against the seat and just took in the scenery around them for a while.

“It feels like I’ve missed out on so much,” Kurt mused.

“You’re missing a week and a half of life, I can imagine it must feel odd,” Blaine replied.

“I’m going back to school on Monday and I’m actually excited. The workload kind of scares me, but I’ll figure out some way to do it,” Kurt said.

“I already figured that out,” Blaine said. “I bought you that voice recognition software for your laptop that you see on TV. Now you just have to talk into the little microphone and it’ll type your work for you. I don’t know how we’ll work your textile classes, but Jason, Colton, and I will all be there to help you.”

Kurt looked over at him, his eyes shimmering with tears. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” Blaine said with a blinding smile, his golden eyes sparkling.

Kurt put the window down a bit and enjoyed the crisp wind that blew across his face. Soon they got to the apartment and Blaine was hurrying around the car, grabbing the wheelchair out of the trunk. Kurt hated that they had to go through this every time they wanted to go somewhere, but it was still better than staying in the hospital.

“I want to do something today,” Kurt said as they approached the elevator, waving to the receptionist.

“Don’t you think you should rest?” Blaine asked, maneuvering him into the elevator.

“Blaine,” Kurt whined. “I’ve been resting for days. I want to do something. I’m so tired of being shut up in a little room all day. I want to be around people and talk and wear pretty clothes.”

“Well, we’ll figure something out, babe. But I don’t want you to go all wild on me when you still have a lot of healing to do,” Blaine said reasonably.

“At least my face is better,” Kurt said, staring at himself in the silver finish of the elevator. He did look a lot better. The swelling was gone and most of the bruises had faded to a dull yellow or were completely gone. He looked like Kurt again instead of a victim and that made his whole outlook bright.

“Your face is beautiful, as always,” Blaine said, leaning down and kissing his temple.

“Mm,” Kurt hummed happily. “Kiss me again.”

“You wish is my command,” Blaine said and leaned around him to plant a soft kiss on his lips.

Kurt whined again when Blaine pulled back, but they had reached their floor. Blaine pushed him out and toward their apartment. He’d noticed Kurt was quite whiney about the whole recovery business. He knew he was used to being active and always going places and doing things, but he was going to have to deal with doing things slower. But it was his goal in life to make Kurt happy, so he would do whatever he could.

He took his keys out and unlocked their door and pushed Kurt inside.

“Surprise!” A crowd of people yelled.

“Ooh, a party!” Kurt shrieked, clapping his hands and bouncing in the wheelchair.  “For me?” he turned and asked Blaine.

“Of course it’s for you, goober,” Blaine said and helped him take his coat off. “I knew you’d want some company and since mine just isn’t good enough anymore, I called in reinforcements.”

The crowd was converging on them to greet Kurt, but Kurt took a moment to lean into Blaine. “Your company is always good enough and more than enough. I love you.”

“I was teasing, babe. I love you, too,” Blaine said and pushed him forward to greet his friends.

Jason and Colton gave Kurt gentle hugs before surprising Blaine by pulling him into a hug as well. The rest of the Warbler’s were there including Puck, Trent, Mr. Schue and even Sam. Blaine watched the blonde closely, but he just greeted Kurt and wished him well. Blaine finally pushed Kurt into the living room and helped him get settled on the couch, with a throw blanket on his lap. He was immediately surrounded by friends chattering about various gossip he’d missed at school. Kurt was in his element, eyes shining, talking animatedly. Blaine smiled and went to the kitchen to get Kurt a cup of coffee. Jason followed him in.

“How are you holding up?” Jason asked.

“Tired. Definitely tired, but happy to have him home. I think I’ll be able to sleep better now that he’ll be next to me. Though I have a feeling I’ll be paranoid about rolling over on him,” Blaine suddenly realized. “Crap, what if I roll over and break another one of his bones?”

“Blaine, chill out! Did you ever roll on top of him in your sleep before? Not including when you were horny?” Jason grinned.

“No, I guess not. Maybe I’ll put a pillow between us,” Blaine thought. “No, I can’t do that, either.”

“You need to feel him in your arms,” Jason said quietly.

“I really, really do,” Blaine agreed and carried the coffee out to Kurt.

“So, Kurt, we thought we’d play a game to make you feel better,” Wes announced.

Kurt’s eyes lit up as he sipped his coffee, sending Blaine a grateful smile. “Okay, what game?”

“Twister!” Wes said, a grin on his face.

Kurt’s smile drooped. “How am I supposed to play that?” Blaine took his cup and he held out his plastered hands.

“You’ll be the game master,” Trent told him, a grin on his face.

“Yeah, you get to boss us around and tell us where to stand and stuff,” Sam added.

“Really?” Kurt said and rubbed his bandaged together, an evil grin on his face.

“I am so not playing,” Blaine said, shaking his head.

“Oh yes you are,” David said. “If we all have to put our lives in the bandaged hands of your fiancé, then you have to join us.”

The others agreed, pushing Blaine until he finally held up his hands in surrender. They moved the furniture back and set out the mat, handing Kurt the directional board.

Kurt spun the hand. “Okay, David, right hand on a green circle.” He spun again and grinned. “Blaine, left foot on a red circle.”

This continued for a few minutes as people started getting body parts on the multi-colored mat. Then it started getting confusing and very fun for Kurt. He started directing people into the most outrageous positions where people were balanced over and around one another, some standing on one foot, others with all four limbs stretched to capacity. Poor Sam was almost doing the splits, his face pained.

“Trent, right hand on yellow,” he said.

“Kurt, the nearest yellow is under Sam’s ass,” Trent complained.

“Come on, don’t be a spoil sport,” Kurt said, giggling.

Trent stretched as far as he could. When his hand brushed Sam’s ass, Sam shrieked and fell, landing on Wes who cried out and took out Trent’s ankle who grabbed onto Blaine to keep from falling. Like dominoes falling, the whole lot of them came tumbling down, moaning and grunting.

Kurt, meanwhile, was clapping his hands in glee, laughing his head off. “This was the best game ever. Who wants to play again?”

No hands went up.

“Blaine, make them play again,” Kurt demanded.

“Um, sorry, babe. I’m with them on this. That was fun, but damn, I’m going to have sore muscles tomorrow that I didn’t even know existed,” Blaine said.

The other guys looked at him gratefully. They all helped each other up.

“Hey Trent, next time you want to grab my ass, you might want to buy me dinner first,” Sam grumbled as they put the mat away.

“Fine, I will,” Trent said, a challenge in his hazel eyes.

Sam turned red and turned away.

“Don’t you guys have presents for Kurt?” Blaine asked.

“Presents?” Kurt exclaimed, excited.

The guys all brought him poorly wrapped gifts. Magazines, a ping pong paddle and ball, a book of puzzles, a kazoo from Puck, and a gift certificate for iTunes from Blaine. Kurt giggled through the unwrapping and thanked everyone thoroughly.

“Where’s the keg?” Jon asked. A couple of the other guys seemed interested in that. Instead, Mr. Schue raised his hand to draw everyone’s attention.

“I have an idea. Why don’t we show Kurt some of what he’s missed during practice,” Mr. Schue suggested.

“That sounds like a plan I can hop on,” Puck said, winking at Kurt.

The guys all assembled into lines near the window. Kurt snuggled into the couch, between Jason and Blaine, envious that he couldn’t be involved in the number, but pleased that he was getting a special, private performance.

“So, this is the number we settled on for the competition. We’ll get you up to speed as soon as you’re up to it,” Mr. Schue said. He put a CD in the stereo and turned it on, nodding to the guys. A deep drum beat started with guitars entering in.

Puck stepped forward and began singing.

 

_(Puck)_

_One more depending on a prayer_

_And we all look away_

_People pretending everywhere_

_It's just another day_

_There's bullets flying through the air_

_And they still carry on_

_We watch it happen over there_

_And then just turn it off_

_(All)_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_We must stand together_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_There's no giving in_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_Hand in hand forever_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_That's when we all win_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_That's, that's, that's when we all win_

_That's, that's, that's when we all win_

_(Puck)_

_They tell us everything's alright_

_And we just go along_

_How can we fall asleep at night_

_When something's clearly wrong_

_When we could feed a starving world_

_With what we throw away_

_But all we serve are empty words_

_That always taste the same_

_(All)_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_We must stand together_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_There's no giving in_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_Hand in hand forever_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_That's when we all win_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_That's, that's, that's when we all win_

_That's, that's, that's when we all win_

_(Puck)_

_The right thing to guide us_

_Is right here inside us_

_No one can divide us_

_When the light is nearly gone_

_But just like a heartbeat_

_The drumbeat carries on_

_And the drumbeat carries on_

_Just like a heart beat_

Kurt was clapping along, enjoying the song. Blaine was watching him, smiling. Kurt caught on to the chorus quickly and added his voice to theirs.

_(All)_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_We must stand together_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_There's no giving in_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_Hand in hand forever_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_That's when we all win_

_Hey, yeah, yeah, hey, yeah_

_That's, that's, that's when we all win_

_That's, that's, that's when we all win_

 

“That was wonderful!” Kurt cheered, clapping with Blaine. “We’re gonna blow that competition out of the water! Puck, you sounded amazing.”

“Well, Puckzilla aims to please. That part was originally for the Blainester, but with you being,” Puck started.

“Never mind Puck, he likes to talk out his ass. I didn’t want the part,” Blaine interrupted when he saw Kurt starting to get upset.

“You lost the solo because of me,” Kurt whispered, his blue eyes large.

“No, baby, I pulled out because it was the best thing for the team. I have my priorities and so do they. Now stop worrying and maybe they’ll sing you another song,” Blaine said, rubbing his fingers along Kurt’s cheek.

“Yeah, we had one more for you specifically,” Wes said. “We hope you like it. It’s to show you how we feel about you.”

“Aw, you guys,” Kurt said, blushing.

Trent put in the next CD and rushed back into formation.

 

_Been a whole lot easier since the bitch left town_

_Been a whole lot happier without that face around_

_Nobody upstairs gonna stomp and shout_

_Nobody out the back door gonna throw my laundry out_

_She holds the shotgun while you dote-se-doe_

_She want one man made of Hercules and Cyrano_

_Been a whole lot easier since the bitch is gone_

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

Kurt’s jaw was stuck hanging down. This was dedicated to him?

“It’s a joke, babe. They wanted to make you laugh. Now flash them the finger so they know you aren’t really upset,” Blaine whispered in his ear. “You know they all love you or they wouldn’t be here. They want to get a rise out of you. Now show them your bitchy side, babe. Let it all out.”

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

_Ain't nobody gonna bow no more when you sound your gong_

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

_Whatcha go 'n' do to get into another one of these here rock 'n' roll songs?_

Kurt’s eyebrow went up haughtily and he stretched his arms up and brought them down, making sure both of his middle fingers were up, one of them in a bandage.

“Stick up your middle finger for me, sweetie,” Kurt whispered to Blaine.

Blaine obliged putting up both of his middle fingers. Kurt waved them to the group, some of them laughing and missing their cues. But they continued on.

_Other people's thoughts they ain't your hand-me-downs_

_Would it be so bad to simply turn around?_

_You cook so well, all nice and French_

_You do your brain surgery too mama, go get yer monkey wrench_

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

_Ain't nobody gonna bow no more when you sound your gong_

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

_What'd ya go 'n' do to get into another one of these here rock 'n' roll songs?_

Kurt grabbed the wrapping paper that was still surrounding him and began rolling them into balls, throwing them at various Warbler’s, making them dance around to dodge.

“Keep singing boys, stay in formation!” Kurt yelled, chucking another wrapping ball at Puck.

Blaine got in on the action, rolling up another ball and handing it to Kurt, who giggled as he threw it at Trent.

_I hope them cigarettes are gonna make you cough_

(The group yelled the next line)

_Hope you heard this song and it pissed you off_

_I take that back I hope you're doing fine_

_And if I had a dollar I might give you ninety-nine._

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

_Ain't nobody gonna bow no more when you sound your gong_

_Little miss, Little miss, Little miss can't be wrong_

_What'd ya go 'n' do to get into another one of these here rock 'n' roll songs?_

Kurt clapped again, laughing so hard, his incision started hurting. But he just held a hand against it and kept laughing. He was having too much fun. “You’re all assholes and I love you very much. And this little miss can’t be wrong will be there at practice on Monday, so watch out,” Kurt warned.

The gang all laughed and came to give Kurt hugs goodbye. They were all headed out to a bar and Kurt wasn’t sad to miss it. He was getting tired. When they had all left, Kurt leaned his head on Blaine’s shoulder.

“That was just what I needed,” he said. “Thank you, sweetie.”

“You’re welcome, babe,” Blaine said, smiling and wrapping their hands together as best as he could.

. . . . .

They spent the rest of the evening resting and watching funny movies on TV. Blaine had found a small pillow and suggested Kurt press it against his incision. Kurt tried and the next time he laughed, he put pressure on the pillow and was surprised when there was only a little pain. The pillow became his constant companion, through dinner and the movie they watched after.

Later, after Blaine had helped Kurt through his bathroom ritual, and into bed, Blaine gingerly snuggled next to him.

“I’m not made of glass, Blaine,” Kurt said dryly.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Blaine said nervously.

“Well, lay down and I’ll snuggle into you. That way I’ll know whether it’s going to hurt or not,” Kurt said.

Blaine did as he asked and soon they were wrapped together. Sighing, Blaine felt a piece of him relax that had been tensed for the last week and a half. He had needed Kurt next to him, their skin touching, their breath mingling, their hearts beating next to each other. Life was going to be okay, they’d get back to normal as long as they were together. Blaine was just about to drift off to sleep, utterly content, when he heard Kurt sigh.

“Blaine, are you still awake?” he whispered.

“Yeah,” Blaine answered sleepily. At Kurt’s next words, his eyes shot open and the fatigue melted away.

“I’m horny.”

 

. . . . .

 

**“When We Stand Together” by Nickelback**

**“Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong” by the Spin Doctors**


	33. Chapter 33

 “Blaine? Did you hear me?” Kurt asked, leaning back to try and see his face.

“Uh, yeah, I heard you. I’m not sure what to do about it, though,” Blaine said, hesitant.

“Well, I was sure you knew all about this given our history. First, when someone is horny, they get the person they love to touch them and put things in places that make them feel really good,” Kurt teased.

Blaine moaned, his body reacting even to Kurt’s silly words. “Kurt, babe, you are all bandaged up and broken, how are we supposed to do anything?”

“No offense, sweetie, but this is where you are supposed to get all inventive and find a way to take care of me,” Kurt said with a giggle.

“It’s a good thing I don’t want to hurt you,” Blaine grumbled, his mind already racing forward to figure out a way for them to be together.

“Oh, hurting me, huh? I think that would be fabulous. Just not yet. Maybe once I’m a bit better,” Kurt said, grinning in the dark.

“Hummel, are you trying to make my cock fall off?” Blaine accused.

Kurt snorted lightly. “Not hardly. It was me, after all, who first brought up the issue of being horny, remember? I’m the one in need here, not you.”

“Not anymore,” Blaine muttered. “Move onto your back and try to not pull anything.”

“Okay,” Kurt said, delighted to be getting his way. He eased gently onto his back and lifted his arms to Blaine.

Blaine leaned down and kissed him gently, brushing their lips lightly together. Kurt eagerly parted his lips and darted his tongue along Blaine’s mouth. Blaine moaned deep in his throat and allowed the motion, though he didn’t want to go much further for his own sanity’s sake. Finally, he pulled away, Kurt panting in need.

“How are we gonna? My ankle won’t let me have my feet propped up and my hands can’t handle doggie style,” Kurt started saying.

Blaine kissed him again, shutting him up with a quick swipe of his tongue. “Hush, I’ve got this figured out.” He moved down Kurt’s body, lifting his shirt to kiss here and there, tonguing over the smooth flesh, enjoying the pants and whimpers coming from Kurt.

He wrangled Kurt’s pants around and pulled his stiff cock out. “Mm, I have certainly missed this,” he said, enjoying the sight.

“I have too,” Kurt said, breathless.

Blaine gave him no warning, just dropped his mouth around his cock, his tongue swirling from the tip all the way to the bottom. He hollowed his cheeks and let Kurt go as far down his throat as he could handle.

“Blaine! I thought we were gonna,” Kurt cut off on a moan.

“Shut up and enjoy,” Blaine said, kissing him lightly on the hip.

He went back to Kurt’s cock and licked a long line from his balls to the weeping tip of his cock before taking him all in his mouth again. Knowing he would suffer as long as he let Kurt suffer, he began a swift rhythm, up and down, around and over, tongue and lightly with the teeth. Kurt was keening softly, his good fingers wrapping in Blaine’s curls.

“Blaine, I’m gonna, I’m gonna,” Kurt warned and shoved his head back as the orgasm ripped through his stomach and out his cock. Blaine swallowed, moaning lightly at the taste and force of Kurt’s orgasm. He tongued him until he was too sensitive, then tucked him back in his pants.

“Thank you, Blaine,” Kurt whispered, suddenly exhausted.

“You’re welcome, babe. Now try to sleep,” Blaine encouraged, letting Kurt snuggle back into his side.

“What about you?” Kurt mumbled.

“I’ll be fine,” Blaine assured him. Kurt soon fell asleep and though Blaine’s balls were aching something fierce, there was nothing more important in this moment than Kurt being here safe, in his arms. Where he belonged, forever.

. . . . .

Two months later…

“Okay, guys, two more numbers. Remember if we win this round, we get to go to Nationals in Miami. We flew through Sectionals, we can do this again. So, Blaine and Kurt, get out there and kick some ass!” Mr. Schue said.

Kurt and Blaine had their duet and then one final group number to round off the competition. The stress was monstrous, but they held hands and exchanged looks before going on stage. Kurt’s limp was barely noticeable and his hands had recovered the full range of motion. He was feeling completely normal, with only some minor aches and pains in the morning. The past months had been blissful, even as it was frustrating to try and get better. He and Blaine had bonded as never before and were even planning their wedding for that summer. They squeezed each other’s hands before walking out on the stage, nodding at the applause they received. The Warbler’s were a hit at the competition so far and they practically had a trip to Nationals in their back pocket.

 

_(Blaine)_

_No more talk of darkness,_

_Forget these wide-eyed fears._

_I'm here, nothing can harm you_

_My words will warm and calm you._

_Let me be your freedom,_

_Let daylight dry your tears._

_I'm here, with you, beside you,_

_To guard you and to guide you . . ._

_(Kurt)_

_Say you love me every waking moment,_

_Turn my head with talk of summertime . . ._

_Say you need me with you, now and always . . ._

_Promise me that all you say is true_

_That's all I ask of you . . ._

_(Blaine)_

_Let me be your shelter,_

_Let me be your light._

_You're safe: no-one will find you_

_Your fears are far behind you . . ._

_(Kurt)_

_All I want is freedom,_

_A world with no more night_

_And you, always beside me_

_To hold me and to hide me . . ._

_(Blaine)_

_Then say you'll share with me_

_One love, one lifetime . . ._

_Let me lead you from your solitude . . ._

_Say you need me with you here, beside you . . ._

_Anywhere you go, let me go too_

_That's all I ask of you . . ._

_(Kurt)_

_Say you’ll share with me one love, one lifetime_

_Say the word and I will follow you_

_(Blaine)_

_Share each day with me, each night each morning_

_(Kurt)_

_Say you love me_

_(Blaine)_

_You know I do_

_(Both)_

_Love me, that’s all I ask of you_

_Anywhere you go let me go too_

_Love me, that’s all I ask of you_

 

The audience was roaring as they sang the last note, their hands clasped together. They had agreed on this song, as it spoke to both of them and showed their voices off to perfection. Bowing, they left the stage, excited for the final group number and the inevitable announcement that they would win.

 

. . . . .

Two more months later…

“Kurt, settle down, he’s not going to bite,” Blaine said, rubbing Kurt’s knee as they drove through upstate New York.

“No, but he might have me shot if he doesn’t approve!” Kurt wailed, his stomach in knots.

“It’s just my dad,” Blaine tried to reassure him. “We’ll be lucky if he even talks to us for five minutes. Now, Mom you’ll have to make small talk with. Besides, we made it through Nationals and won without you getting this nervous, what’s the big deal?”

“First, I like Elyse. She’s a lovely woman. But your dad? We’ve been together and engaged for months and I’ve still never met him. To me, he’s _the_ Mr. Anderson, the man who may or may not have mafia connections. The man who has ‘guys’,” Kurt said with air quotes. “Guys who, you know, who get stuff done. Much scarier than an audience at Nationals.”

“Well, none of those guys will be there. It’s just us and my parents. I’m just glad I got you to agree to come with me,” Blaine said, pulling up to what should be considered a palace, but Kurt was sure they just referred to it as a house. “The Anderson estate,” Blaine announced.

Kurt stood corrected. “Estate, huh?” he said, swallowing hard.

“Yeah, when it’s twenty acres and the house has ten bedrooms, it kind of qualifies as an estate,” Blaine said, rolling his eyes. He might like the benefits of having a lot of money, but he certainly didn’t like the trappings.

Blaine parked the car and they went up to the door, Kurt tugging nervously at his suit jacket.

“You look fine, baby,” Blaine assured him, taking his hand. He opened the door and walked in.

“Kiki?” he called.

“Kiki?” Kurt whispered.

“Her real name is Cheryl, but her sister started calling her Kiki, I heard it once and it stuck,” Blaine explained.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t tell me who Kiki is,” Kurt clarified.

Blaine laughed. “Oh, sorry, she’s the housekeeper. My parents hired her when our old housekeeper died. They loved her so much, well at least Mother did, that they let her and her boyfriend move in. She’s been here ever since.”

“Blaine, sweetie, I’m so glad you’re home. Your mother is driving me crazy,” a petite woman said, her honey brown hair, cut in a cute bob around her face. She walked up to them and kissed Blaine on the cheek. “This must be Kurt! Hi honey,” she said, kissing Kurt’s cheek. “You’re right, he is a hottie,” she said with a wink.

“Nice to meet you,” Kurt said, his face bright red.

“Tone it down, Kiki. He’s taken and so are you,” Blaine teased her.

“I know that. But sheesh, just cause you’re on a diet doesn’t mean you can’t look at the menu,” she said, sizing Kurt up again.

“And how is Darren?” Blaine asked pointedly.

“Hot as ever. We’re thinking about going to Vegas next week. They do some sort of scavenger hunt through one of the casino’s and Darren just can’t let go of the idea,” Kiki said, rolling her eyes. “Now, come on, you two. Elyse and Stefan are in the lounge. We need to get in there before they are forced to  talk to each other.”

They walked into a large room decorated tastefully, but minimally. Chaises, wing-back chairs, and a few small tables were all that was in the room. Stefan was standing at a small bar off to the side, pouring scotch into a cup.

“Blaine and Mr. Hummel to see you,” Kiki said formally before winking at them and walking away.

“Mother, Father, it’s good to see you,” Blaine said.

“You’re late,” Stefan Anderson said, turning around. His gray hair was cropped short, his eyes the same honey-gold color that Blaine’s were. Though Stefan Anderson’s eyes had none of the warmth or playfulness that was most often seen in Blaine’s nowadays. His eyes reminded Kurt of when he’d first met Blaine. Those were not friendly eyes.

“Actually, Father, we are right on time,” Blaine said easily, checking his watch.

His father made a noncommittal sound.

“Blaine, Kurt, it’s so good to see you again,” Elyse said, rising gracefully and coming over to give them an air kiss over each of their cheeks. “Kurt, you look good. No more limp, I see.”

“No, ma’am. My ankle has healed well,” Kurt said quietly.

They stood there quietly for a moment.

“Father, this is my fiancé, Kurt Hummel,” Blaine said, steering Kurt toward his father with his hand on the small of his back. He realized his father was going to be rude and not introduce himself or welcome Kurt to his home, so Blaine would have to make the effort.

“Sir, it’s nice to finally meet you,” Kurt said, offering his hand, trying to control the quivers running through it.

“Hmm,” Stefan said, shaking his hand limply. “Hummel, huh? Any relation to the Charleston Hummel’s?”

“Not that I know of, sir. My family is all from Ohio,” Kurt said, trying not to let the insult of his handshake sting.

“Ohio. No one important is from Ohio,” Stefan mused, draining his Scotch in one swallow and walking back toward the bar.

“Actually, yes, someone important is from Ohio,” Blaine said hotly. “His name is Kurt Hummel and he is going to be my husband. Now I came here to introduce you to Kurt and I’ve done that. I wish I hadn’t, but at least we won’t ever have to repeat this again. Mother, you are more than welcome to the wedding, as well as Kiki, but don’t bring him,” he said. Taking Kurt’s hand, they turned and walked back to the door. Kiki was waiting there, a small basket of baked treats in her hands.

“I’m sorry, sweetie,” she said sympathetically, hugging them both quickly.

“Please come to the wedding,” Kurt said, accepting the basket she offered him.

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world. You boys take care,” she said, holding the door for them.

The visit had lasted less than ten minutes and only two of it was in the presence of Blaine’s father. Kurt offered to drive back to their hotel, but Blaine said he needed the distraction. They ordered room service and sat down to the quiet dinner.

Blaine dropped his napkin after only a couple bites. “Kurt, I am so damn sorry.”

“Why?” Kurt asked. “Because of your dad?”

“Yeah. He had no right to treat you like that. He can be an asshole to me all he wants, but there was no call to be so rude to you,” Blaine said, putting his head in his hands.

Kurt came around the small table they were sitting at. He knelt next to Blaine and wrapped his arms around him. “I don’t care, sweetie. Yes, I wish he’d embraced me and told me how excited he was to become my father-in-law, but I knew going in that this would most likely be the outcome.”

Blaine pushed Kurt away so he could look in his eyes. “You figured you’d get treated like garbage?”

“Well, I didn’t know for certain, but I knew he had some problems with you, so why would I expect any different,” Kurt said simply, putting Blaine’s hand on his face and rubbing against it.

“Then why would you even come?” Blaine had to know.

“Why do I do anything? For you. Everything I do is for you,” Kurt said with a smile. “I love you.”

Blaine leaned down until their foreheads rested against each other. “I love you, too. You are amazing, you know that?”

“I know I have an amazing fiancé,” Kurt grinned.

“I want you, Kurt,” Blaine said suddenly, a fire lighting in his golden eyes. “Now.”

Kurt’s mouth went dry at the intense look Blaine was giving him. “Okay.”

“I want you like I wanted you that first night at the party. Remember, when we grinded against each other until we came in our pants?” Blaine whispered against his ear, licking at the shell of flesh.

“Um. Uh huh,” Kurt whimpered.

“I want to fuck you up against the wall, nothing between us,” Blaine breathed.

“O-Okay,” Kurt said.

“Take your clothes off,” Blaine commanded.

Kurt felt his cock harden almost immediately at the order. Blaine walked over and plugged his iPod into the entertainment system and Kurt heard the music come on. If possible, he got harder as he quickly began to strip. Somehow, Blaine still managed to beat him, coming over completely nude to yank Kurt’s pants off the rest of the way. He stood and yanked Kurt’s mouth to his, tilting his head so their lips met perfectly, his tongue plunging hotly into Kurt’s. Moaning loudly, Kurt met the deep thrusts of Blaine’s tongue, enjoying the feeling of being dominated.

 

_I wanna do it till the sun comes up_

_Till we're both so good and sweaty we can't stand up_

_I wanna do it till we're both about to drop_

_As long as we're caught in together we're never gonna stop._

_I wanna go until the neighbors all complain_

_Cause they heard somebody screaming and they think we're both in pain_

_I wanna go so long your parents think you died_

_There gonna call the cops the CIA and then the FBI_

 

Blaine walked Kurt backwards until his heated skin touched the cold wall, making him gasp. When Blaine nipped at his bottom lip, Kurt couldn’t help the whimper that escaped him. Blaine growled softly, leaving his mouth to bite his way down Kurt’s long neck, settling in to suck a large bruise at his collar bone.

 

_Yeah, we're gonna love it when the lights go down_

_Hold on here we go_

_Yeah, we're gonna go until our legs give out_

_Round and round we go_

_Yeah, we're gonna do it hanging upside down_

_Up and down we go_

_Yeah, we're getting ready for the next go round_

_Round and round we go_

 

The music pulsed around them, seeming to spur Blaine on to kiss and suck at his skin almost violently, Kurt crying out at each touch, his cock throbbing with need.

“Blaine, please, fuck me,” Kurt begged, knowing that he would come if Blaine kept at this.

“God, yes, I’ll fuck you,” Blaine promised, his voice gruff with need.

He reached around to grab Kurt’s ass and lifted him easily against the wall. Kurt wrapped his long legs around his waist, arms around Blaine’s neck. Now it was Kurt’s time to suck and lick at Blaine’s ear and neck, enjoying the harsh sounds that came from deep in his throat.

 

_Shut the windows lock the doors unplug the phone_

_For all intents and purposes there ain't no body home_

_Then we can do it till the batteries are gone_

_And borrow two from the TV remote to throw this thing back on_

_I wanna cover you with jello in the tub_

_We can roll around for hours without ever coming up_

_I want you naked with your favorite heels on_

_Slap John Deere across my ass and ride me up and down the lawn_

 

Blaine slicked up his fingers, Kurt didn’t know how, but he didn’t care as he plunged two fingers inside Kurt. Kurt screeched at the half pain, half pleasure that engulfed him. Blaine paused, only giving him a moment to adjust, before thrusting his fingers in and out quickly, sucking yet another bruise into his skin, this one just above his nipple. Kurt panted, unable to fathom how Blaine was able to keep him up when he was already a pile of mush.

“Okay, I’m ready, get in me now,” Kurt begged from between clenched teeth.

 

_Yeah, we're gonna love it when the lights go down_

_Hold on here we go_

_Yeah, we're gonna go until our legs give out_

_Round and round we go_

_Yeah, we're gonna do it hanging upside down_

_Up and down we go_

_Yeah, we're getting ready for the next go round_

_Round and round we go_

 

“Yes,” Blaine said simply before lowering Kurt directly onto his cock. They both cried out, shuddering together as Blaine filled him to capacity. “Shit, baby, you are so fucking tight.”

“Uh,” was all Kurt could manage. Kurt began bucking against Blaine immediately, thrusting his hips up and down. Blaine took the hint and leaned Kurt more into the wall so he could drive into him, pounding his cock into Kurt until they were both almost crying. Over and over, he plunged into him, panting Kurt’s name in time to his thrusts.

 

_Yeah, we're gonna love it when the lights go down_

_Hold on here we go_

_Yeah, we're gonna go until our legs give out_

_Round and round we go_

_Yeah, we're gonna do it hanging upside down_

_Up and down we go_

_Yeah, we're getting ready for the next go round_

_Round and round we go_

“Oh fuck, Kurt, I’m gonna come,” Blaine threatened.

Kurt reached down and stroked himself with a tight fist. “Oh god, just another minute,” he begged.

Blaine added a twist to his hips as he drove into Kurt, hitting just where Kurt needed him to, causing them both to cry out and Kurt didn’t need another minute. He came almost violently, spraying him and Blaine with thick white streaks.

 “Damn, baby,” Blaine gritted out, seeing him come. The pulsing around his cock was too much and he thrust in as hard as he could, shouting as he came deep inside Kurt.

He balanced them against the wall for another moment before he felt his legs giving out. He grinned, knowing that’s just what the song had predicted. Using the last of his strength, he carried Kurt to the bed, knowing by how Kurt was sagged against him, that he wouldn’t be able to walk. He laid him down and walked to get a wash cloth, cleaning them both up. Staggering back to the bed after turning the stereo off, he collapsed next to Kurt who immediately curled up next to him, his head fitting perfectly in the curve of Blaine’s shoulder.

“I love you,” Kurt whispered.

“I love you, too, baby,” Blaine answered as they both fell asleep.

 

. . . . .

One month later…

Kurt’s hands were shaking. He didn’t have any idea how many hours he’d been sitting there, staring. His freshman year of college was almost over. There was only three weeks until the wedding, all the invitations were sent out, RSVP’s were received. He knew there was still planning and studying he should be doing, but he couldn’t, not right now. Not when everything had the potential to change. All because of the letter he held in his hands.

Blaine came through the door. “I’m home, babe,” he called, throwing his backpack on the table.

“In here,” Kurt said, staring at the white piece of paper.

“How was your day? Kurt? What’s wrong, baby?” Blaine asked, rushing over when he saw the look on Kurt’s pale face.

“We have our plans made, don’t we?” Kurt asked quietly. “We’re going to get married, go on our honeymoon, then you are going to start on your book, while I go back to school.”

Blaine had finally figured out what he wanted to do in life and that was write. Kurt had read some of the essays he’d written for school and other short stories he’d done over the years and he’d encouraged him to go for it. Blaine planned to write a biography and when he’d sent the proposal off to a couple agents, one had snatched it up. A publisher had already been found and the deal was made. Blaine was going to be an author in six month’s time. He was taking a year off college to write and have time to promote it. It had all been so sudden and so amazing that neither of them had questioned that it was meant to be. Kurt had given his permission for his own story to be included since their stories were now one.

But now, now all that could change. Their stories might end up being separate after all.

“Yeah, that’s the plan, Kurt. What’s going on?” Blaine was truly concerned, seeing tears shining in Kurt’s eyes.

Kurt handed him the letter wordlessly. Blaine scanned it quickly and turned to stare at Kurt.

Tears overflowed his eyes and Kurt looked at him, his heart breaking. “I can’t say no, Blaine.”

 

. . . . .

 

**“All I Ask Of You” from Phantom of the Opera**

**“Next Go Round” by Nickelback**


	34. Chapter 34

Blaine looked at Kurt in stunned silence. He took Kurt’s hand in his. “Of course you can’t say no, babe. I wouldn’t expect you to.”

Kurt felt his heart breaking into a million pieces, each piece sharper than any razor blade he could imagine. “But, I can’t imagine doing it. Not this way.”

“Baby, you have to. Things like this only come along once in a lifetime. Just like my book deal. You have to take the opportunities that life gives you,” Blaine said, wondering at the pale agony on Kurt’s face.

“But not without you,” Kurt whispered.

“Of course, not without me,” Blaine said, confused. “What are you talking about?”

“Didn’t you read the letter? The apprenticeship is in Paris, Blaine! How can I be doing that in Paris when you’re going to be writing here in New York?” Kurt cried, tears falling like rain.

“Kurt, Kurt, stop,” Blaine said.

Kurt continued to sob, wishing it all hadn’t come down to this.

“Kurt, snap the fuck out of it and stop crying,” Blaine yelled.

Kurt’s head came up, shock written across his tear streaked face.

“Didn’t you hear me? I said you wouldn’t be going without me,” Blaine explained.

“But,” Kurt said, stunned. “But I can’t ask you to give up your book deal.”

“Just as I would never ask you to give up this chance in Paris,” Blaine said. “But you know the great thing about being the ‘talent’?”

“What?” Kurt said, trying to get what he was saying.

“Kurt, baby, I can write my book anywhere. That’s the wonderful thing about computers. Yeah, I’ll have to come back to promote it and do any tours that I get, but maybe by that time you can come with me. Neither of us have to give up our dreams,” Blaine said gently.

“You’ll go with me to Paris?” Kurt asked dumbly.

“Of course,” Blaine said. “Ooph!” Kurt tackled him against the couch cushions, crawling up his body to plant kisses all over his face.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you, Blaine. I love you so much,” Kurt said, kissing him. “So, what have I been so worked up about, then?” Kurt asked, delight in his ocean eyes.

“It’s your inner Diva, babe. It can’t help but bring about some unneeded drama every now and then,” Blaine said, bringing him down for a more lingering kiss. “By the way, congratulations on your apprenticeship.”

Kurt kissed him once more and then jumped off the couch. “Thank you! Can you believe it? We’re going to move to Paris! Oh my god, this means I have to drop out of college,” Kurt said, stunned.

“I’m sure they have colleges in France, babe,” Blaine smiled. He had a feeling the coming weeks were going to be absolutely insane. Finals, the wedding, and moving to a foreign country. Holy crap, he thought, we’re moving to another country. Wow. “Forget a wedding planner, we need a life planner,” he muttered.

“I need paper, I have to make lists, Kurt said, his face going frantic.

“Well, bring it to the car, we have the final Warbler meeting today,” Blaine said, going to grab a notebook and shoving it in Kurt’s hands.

Kurt stood there, tears filling his eyes again. “It’s truly our last Warbler meeting, too, isn’t it?”

Blaine understood that look. He was having a problem not getting choked up at the thought of not seeing his friends again. At least for a long while. He knew they would be back to visit, and probably often, but it wouldn’t be the same.

“Come on, babe,” he said and they walked silently in the car. The drive consisted of little talk, but they agreed to tell all of their friends the news.

All of the Warbler’s seemed to have been hit by the end-of-the-year emotions. Hugs were being given out to anyone standing still long enough.

“I love you guys,” Trent whimpered, grabbing Kurt and Blaine together to hug them.

“We love you, too, big guy,” Blaine said fondly.

Colton came up and took Kurt’s hand. “Can you believe this is the last meeting of the year?”

Kurt squeezed his hand. “I know. I’m trying not to cry,” he said. For more reasons than one, he thought. But they’d agreed to save the news until the end of the meeting.

Blaine got caught up in hugs from Wes and David with promises to write and text over the summer. Blaine thanked Wes for everything he’d done in his life, truly grateful for the man giving him a new chance at life, but treating him as an equal. He was then grabbed by Puck who hugged him and threatened his life should he ever harm Kurt. Blaine laughed and told him he had nothing to worry about.

Jason came up behind Colton and wrapped his long arm around him, leaning down to kiss his cheek. Kurt smiled and embraced them both.

“You know I love you both, don’t you?” Kurt asked tearfully.

“Of course, diva,” Jason said with a wink. “We love you, too. You were a pretty damn good roommate.”

“And a wonderful friend,” Colton added, his voice catching.

“Now, none of that or we won’t be able to stop,” Kurt said.

“Hey Kurt,” Sam said, walking up to them. “I just wanted to wish you a happy summer and tell you I’m glad we got to be friends.”

Kurt grinned at him. “Me too, Sam. Let’s keep in touch over the summer?”

“Sure. I’d hug you, but Blaine’s already glaring at me, so how about a handshake?” Sam said nervously.

Waving off Blaine and his stare, Kurt leaned in and gave Sam a quick hug. “He’s all bark and no bite,” he said. Of course he was until someone tried to Kurt. He shuddered at the memory of the beating Blaine had given Marco. He was glad that whole era of his life was over. He’d had nightmares for a while and had to back on the sleeping pills from Juliet. But everything was fine now. His scars were even getting lighter since he’d found a wonderful product that minimized scars. Life was good and though it would be bittersweet for a little while, he was exhilarated at the new adventure they were facing.

Blaine came and took his hand as they found their seats.

Mr. Schue called the meeting to order and chuckled when he realized that for the first time all year, all the Warbler’s were grouped together in the seats instead of being spread out as they usually were.

“First, I want to say that I am so proud of all you. We got our third National championship trophy and that is only because you all worked your butts off. I am honored to be your director. Second, I have a song for us to sing, something to inspire you as you go off for the summer. And for those of you who might not be back next year, just remember. Once a Warbler, always a Warbler,” Mr. Schue said, tears in his eyes.

The group stood as one and applauded him with shouts of thanks and ‘I love you’. For the final time, they assembled on the stage, Mr. Schue handing out sheet music to them individually and shaking their hands like it was a graduation. High fives were passed around and everyone was grinning, happy to perform together one last time. As the music began and Kurt looked at the music, he realized why Mr. Schue had handed them out. There were solos that he’d marked. He grinned when he saw one for him. Kurt closed his eyes and listened to Blaine open the song. The lyrics made him open his eyes and he saw that Blaine was singing to him. They shared a secret smile and lost themselves to the music.

 

_(Blaine)_

_My best friend gave me the best advice_

_He said each day's a gift and not a given right_

_Leave no stone unturned, leave your fears behind_

_And try to take the path less traveled by_

_That first step you take is the longest stride_

_(Group)_

_If today was your last day_

_And tomorrow was too late_

_Could you say goodbye to yesterday?_

_Would you live each moment like your last?_

_Leave old pictures in the past_

_Donate every dime you have?_

_If today was your last day_

_(Kurt and Colton)_

_Against the grain should be a way of life_

_What's worth the prize is always worth the fight_

_(Kurt)_

_Every second counts 'cause there's no second try_

_So live like you'll never live it twice_

_Don't take the free ride in your own life_

_(Group)_

_If today was your last day_

_And tomorrow was too late_

_Could you say goodbye to yesterday?_

_Would you live each moment like your last?_

_Leave old pictures in the past_

_Donate every dime you have?_

_(Wes and David)_

_Would you call old friends you never see?_

_Reminisce old memories_

_Would you forgive your enemies?_

_(Blaine)_

_Would you find that one you're dreamin' of?_

_Swear up and down to God above_

_That you finally fall in love_

_If today was your last day_

_(Trent)_

_If today was your last day_

_Would you make your mark by mending a broken heart?_

_You know it's never too late to shoot for the stars_

_Regardless of who you are_

Kurt sang with tears streaming down his face. He had gotten a second chance and he would never take it for granted.

_(Kurt)_

_So do whatever it takes_

_'Cause you can't rewind a moment in this life_

_Let nothin' stand in your way_

_Cause the hands of time are never on your side_

_(Blaine and Kurt)_

_If today was your last day_

_And tomorrow was too late_

_Could you say goodbye to yesterday?_

_(Group)_

_Would you live each moment like your last?_

_Leave old pictures in the past_

_Donate every dime you have?_

_Would you call old friends you never see?_

_Reminisce old memories_

_Would you forgive your enemies?_

_Would you find that one you're dreamin' of?_

_Swear up and down to God above_

_That you finally fall in love_

_If today was your last day_

 

The final melodies rang out a capella, all of them giving it their all. When the last note came, the room went silent. Suddenly a cheer broke the quiet, Puck yelling “Dalton!” All of the joined in, chanting faster and faster until they all were cheering and applauding.

There was another round of hugs given, tears in some eyes, promises to hang out.

Mr. Schue held up his hands. “That’s all we had for today, guys. Again, I am so proud of you all. Have a safe summer and I hope to see you all next year. Keep singing, keep those voices strong, but don’t overdo it,” he said with a smile.

The guys started leaving the stage when Blaine stepped forward. “Actually, Mr. Schue, Kurt and I kind of wanted to talk to you guys for a minute, if that’s okay.”

Everyone agreed and sat down, looking up at them curiously.

Kurt and Blaine stood center stage, gazing fondly on their friends. Blaine took Kurt’s hand and nodded his support.

“I just wanted to say that I love each and every one of you. Thank you for your support and love this year. It hasn’t been easy, but I’d like to think we made it through together. And now, we are really going to need your support. I got a letter offering me an apprenticeship with a major fashion design firm,” Kurt said. The group applauded and whistled for him. “The thing of it is; it’s in Paris.”

The room sat in stunned silence. “What?” Colton said, tears already in his eyes.

Kurt’s eyes began watering at the sight. “Blaine and I are moving to Paris after the wedding. Neither of us will be returning to Dalton,” he said.

“Not cool!” Puck yelled, looking more upset than mad.

“You guys aren’t coming back, like ever?” Wes asked.

“We’ll be back to visit, but yes, the majority of our time will be spent in Paris,” Blaine said.

“I wish you the best,” Jason said, his deep voice breaking. “We’ll miss you guys.” Colton cuddled up next to him and Jason held him tightly.

“I know it’s a shock, but this isn’t something we can pass up,” Blaine said.

Kurt loved him even more in that moment because he said it was something “we” can’t pass up, not just Kurt. It was always going to be them; they were a team.

“We, uh, prepared a short number to say goodbye. Please know we love you all,” Kurt said.

Blaine went and put a CD in and they sat next to each other on the stage, their feet dangling over the edge.

 

_(Blaine)_

_I'm limited_

_Just look at me - I'm limited_

_And just look at you_

_You can do all I couldn't do, Glinda_

_So now it's up to you_

_For both of us_

_Now it's up to you_

Kurt gestured around the room, singing to each one of his friends.

_(Kurt)_

_I've heard it said_

_That people come into our lives for a reason_

_Bringing something we must learn_

_And we are led_

_To those who help us most to grow_

_If we let them_

_And we help them in return_

_Well, I don't know if I believe that's true_

_But I know I'm who I am today_

_Because I knew you..._

Kurt could see tears already streaming down Colton’s face. Jason was biting his lip hard. Puck had his hands clasped in front of him, his expression pained. Trent was openly crying. Wes and David were blinking rapidly.

 

_Like a comet pulled from orbit_

_As it passes a sun_

_Like a stream that meets a boulder_

_Halfway through the wood_

_Who can say if I've been changed for the better?_

_Because I knew you_

_I have been changed for good_

_(Blaine)_

_It well may be_

_That we will never meet again_

_In this lifetime_

_So let me say before we part_

_So much of me_

_Is made from what I learned from you_

_You'll be with me_

_Like a hand print on my heart_

_And now whatever way our stories end_

_I know you have re-written mine_

_By being our friends..._

Blaine grinned as he changed the words. He knew his friends were being affected and he hoped they all were able to realize how much they meant to him and Kurt.

_Like a ship blown from its mooring_

_By a wind off the sea_

_Like a seed dropped by a sky bird_

_In a distant wood_

_Who can say if I've been changed for the better?_

_But because I knew you_

_(Kurt)_

_Because I knew you_

_(Both)_

_I have been changed for good_

Blaine sang purposefully, glancing from Wes to David, apologizing and thanking them at the same time for giving him a chance.

 

_(Blaine)_

_And just to clear the air_

_I ask forgiveness_

_For the things I've done you blame me for_

_(Kurt)_

_But then, I guess we know_

_There's blame to share_

_(Both)_

_And none of it seems to matter anymore_

_(Kurt / Blaine)_

_Like a comet pulled from orbit (Like a ship blown from its mooring)_

_As it passes a sun (By a wind off the sea)_

_Like a stream that meets a boulder (Like a seed dropped)_

_Halfway through the wood (By a bird in the wood)_

_(Both)_

_Who can say if I've been_

_Changed for the better?_

_I do believe I have been_

_Changed for the better_

_(Kurt)_

_And because we knew you_

_(Blaine)_

_Because we knew you_

_(Both)_

_Because we knew you_

_We have been changed…  for good_

As they slid the rest of the way off the stage, they were surrounded by Warblers, tears and hugs all around. A group hug was formed and they stood that way for a long while, the camaraderie and feeling of family so deep, they just couldn’t let go.

 

. . . . . .

Three weeks later…

“Kurt, Kurt, for god’s sake, calm down! You’re getting married, this is supposed to be a happy day,” Colton said, grabbing Kurt’s flailing arms.

“Didn’t you hear me? The caterer brought oysters instead of the crudités that I expressly ordered,” Kurt said, panicking. “It’s not going to be perfect.”

“I am so gonna slap your face if you do not calm the hell down!” Colton said, shaking him lightly. “You need to get dressed or are you gonna let the damn caterer keep you from meeting Blaine at the altar?”

That seemed to snap Kurt out of it. Then he looked at himself in the simple jeans and button up he was wearing.

“Oh my god, I’m not dressed! The wedding starts in a half hour! I gotta change!” he wailed.

Colton shook his head and walked over to get the suit hanging on the armoire. They were in the penthouse suite of the Waldorf-Astoria and though the view was spectacular, Colton was sure Kurt hadn’t even glanced around the room, much less eyed the scenery.

Kurt hurried into the bathroom and made sure his hair was still coiffed perfectly. That was the reason for the button up shirt, so his hair wouldn’t get touched. He usually had his hair standing straight up, but Blaine preferred it off-center a little bit. Off kilter, he says, like Kurt is. So he’d done his hair to please his soon-to-be husband. Taking a deep breath, he couldn’t believe he was getting married. After his dad died, he’d been so alone, he’d thought there would never be anyone important in his life. Now here he was, on his wedding day. Tears escaped his eyes as he thought of his father. He wished he was here. He would bury himself in his father’s strong arms, look into those green eyes and know that everything was perfect. But that wasn’t to be. Blaine was everything to him, though, and he knew his father would approve.

He walked back into the bedroom and calmly stripped and slipped into his suit. The black jacket was long, tailored perfectly to his shape. He had chosen a discreet silver ascot instead of a tie to go over the crisp white shirt. The jacket had a single silver button that attached mid-waist. For an accessory, he had found a dainty silver chain that attached onto his collar and hung down and across his front and attached to his pocket square on the other side. It was just enough beauty without being gaudy. He loved it.

Spinning in front of the mirror to get a full view, he couldn’t believe how utterly happy he was. He slipped into his shiny black shoes and turned to Colton who had also dressed quickly. Colton would be his best man as Wes would be Blaine’s. They only had two attendants, even though they’d wanted all of the Warbler’s and Jason to stand up with them. It would have been a bit much, though, so they each settled for their closest friend.

“Are you ready?” Colton asked him, smiling tremulously.

“I was born for this moment,” Kurt said simply, his blue-green eyes shining with emotion.

There was a hesitant knock on the door. Kurt beckoned them to come in and a small woman with close cropped copper hair, peeked in.

“It’s time, Kurt,” she said in her sweet voice.

Kurt smiled at their officiator. Mardie had been the fourth person they’d called when they’d wanted someone to perform their wedding. Surprisingly, even in New York there was still prejudice. Mardie, however, had sounded excited at the prospect.

“Alright, thank you,” Kurt said, suddenly excited and eager.

He and Colton embraced before heading to the elevator with Mardie. On the way down, Kurt patted his pockets.

“I have the ring,” Colton reassured him.

“Okay, good,” Kurt smiled. “It’s going to be perfect, isn’t it?”

“It really is,” he agreed, his blue eyes twinkling. Colton couldn’t be happier for his friend. Of course, he was happy for himself, too, as Jason had given him a promise ring just the night before. It was a promise that they would be together and that after college, they might take the same steps Kurt and Blaine were taking.

They stepped out of the elevator and headed toward the ballroom where the wedding would take place.

Mardie gave Kurt a hug and walked in the room to take her place at the altar.

Colton went to a nearby table and picked up two flowers and came back to Kurt. He handed him the single red-orange lily and kept the other for himself.

“Ready?” Colton whispered, hearing the music start.

“Ready,” Kurt whispered back, his throat thick with emotion.

Colton slowly started walking down the aisle to the Pachelbel’s Canon in D Major. Once he reached the altar, Kurt began his walk.

He saw Blaine immediately and gasped loudly at the sight of him in his tuxedo. His black suit also had a longer jacket, but was opened to reveal a beautiful, shimmering satin waistcoat. A thick black tie finished it off. His pocket square was the same as Kurt’s; silver with black flecks throughout. The suit was so well fitted, Kurt couldn’t help feeling a bit breathless. Blaine was beautiful. His hair was curly as normal as Kurt had requested. But it was his eyes that were capturing him. Those golden eyes, so full of love and adoration, shining with tears. Kurt knew his eyes must look the same as he completed those last few steps. He realized he hadn’t looked at any of his guests, but he knew all that mattered was Blaine.

Reaching the altar, he handed his lily to Colton and turned to take Blaine’s hands in his.

“You are so beautiful,” Blaine said, his heart in his eyes.

“You take my breath away,” Kurt whispered back, a tear sliding down his cheek.

"Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends,” Mardie began.  “We are gathered here today to witness and celebrate the joining of Blaine and Kurt in marriage. With love and commitment, they have decided to live their lives together as husbands. They have opted for their own vows. Blaine, if you would," Mardie said, smiling at them happily.

Blaine took the ring from Wes, his hands shaking slightly. “Kurt, when we first met, I was a different person. I was a hard person, mean and uncaring. Something about you began to crack that exterior. You got inside the barriers I had placed around me. At some points, I hated you for that,” he said, smiling. “But then I realized that when you were around, I could be myself, the real me that I’d been struggling to hide for so many years. I would not be who I am today, if I hadn’t met you. Today, I am happy, calm, and so very much in love. You have the most beautiful, compassionate soul I have ever seen. And strength, god, Kurt, you are so strong and I depend on that strength. I love you with everything within me, every last cell. I promise to love you forever and beyond. Through sickness and health, rich and poor, until we are old and doddering fools,” he said with a broken chuckle, tears sliding down his face. “And after we die, I promise to continue loving you, for all eternity.” With that, he slid the simple band onto Kurt’s left hand.

Kurt sighed deeply, sniffing and wiping his tears away. He took the ring from Colton. “Blaine, I did hate you at first. But like you said, you started to break through the walls I had. I was so afraid to love. The people I loved most in the world, my parents, died and left me alone. I didn’t know if I would ever be happy. But you sparked that happiness in me and I thank you for that. Thank you for your acceptance, your compassion and sympathy and your strength. You have saved me in every way a person can be saved and I thank you for that. I love you so much. You are a part of me. As much a part of me as me being a diva,” Kurt said, grinning through his tears. “You are mine and I am yours. Forever. I promise this to you today,” he said and slid the ring onto Blaine’s left hand.

“Blaine Everett Anderson, do you take Kurt Elizabeth Hummel to be your lawfully wedded husband,” Mardie asked.

“I do,” Blaine said, loud and sure.

“Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, do you take Blaine Everett Anderson to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do,” Kurt said, smiling so wide his cheeks ached.

“By the power vested in me by the wonderful state of New York, I now pronounce you husbands,” Mardie said grandly. “You may now kiss.”

Blaine pulled Kurt close, his hand resting gently on his cheek. Looking deep into his eyes, he guided their lips together. The kiss was soft and so very sweet, their lips moving gently together, adoring each other, worshiping.

When they pulled apart, Kurt’s eyes were glazed with passion. Blaine couldn’t help one more kiss as the audience  chuckled and hooted their approval.

“I am honored to present to you all, Mr. and Mr. Hummel-Anderson,” Mardie announced.

The crowd applauded, cheering for them as they walked down the aisle, their arms wrapped around each other.

Making it into the hallway, Blaine stopped Kurt and kissed him passionately, swiping his tongue across Kurt’s full lips and dipping into his mouth. Moving into him, he kissed him until Kurt was bending backward, Blaine dipping him as he kissed him. Kurt sighed in pleasure, his arms around Blaine’s neck.

Still holding him in the dip, Blaine looked deep into those wide blue-green eyes. “I love you so damn much, Kurt. Thank you for doing me the honor of becoming my husband.”

He pulled Kurt up and kissed him softly. Kurt’s eyes glowed with adoration. “I love you, Blaine. I am so proud to call you my husband. I want to shout it from the rooftops of New York and Paris,” he said joyfully.

“And so we will,” Blaine said.

. . . . .

“And now we’ll have the happy couple come on up here for their first dance,” Puck announced. He was playing deejay and started the song they had picked as their own.

Blaine pulled Kurt into his arms and began swaying and moving to the music.

 

_When I see your smile_

_Tears roll down my face I can't replace_

_And now that I'm strong I have figured out_

_How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul_

_And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one_

Blaine sang along softly, gazing lovingly into Kurt’s eyes. This man, this beautiful creature was officially his. Nothing would ever feel better than this moment right now.

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

Blaine began twirling Kurt around the dance floor, into a sort of waltz, singing at the top of his lungs. Kurt joined in and they spun and sang.

_It's okay. It's okay. It's okay._

_Seasons are changing_

_And waves are crashing_

_And stars are falling all for us_

_Days grow longer and nights grow shorter_

_I can show you I'll be the one_

_I will never let you fall (let you fall)_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all (through it all)_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

_Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart_

_Please don't throw that away_

_Cuz I'm here for you_

_Please don't walk away and_

_Please tell me you'll stay whoa, stay whoa_

Kurt felt so free, dancing across the floor, Blaine’s strong arms supporting him. He closed his eyes and just felt the moment, felt the incredible love he had for this man, the song flowing through him.

_Use me as you will_

_Pull my strings just for a thrill_

_And I know I'll be okay_

_Though my skies are turning gray_

_I will never let you fall_

_I'll stand up with you forever_

_I'll be there for you through it all_

_Even if saving you sends me to heaven_

The audience clapped and Kurt pulled Blaine in for a long kiss, their tongues meeting and mingling.

“This is the perfect moment,” Kurt whispered. “You are my perfect moment.”

“You are mine,” Blaine replied simply.

 

. . . . .

 

The couple stumbled into the penthouse suite, laughing, kissing and working at getting each other’s tuxes off.

“I can’t believe you smeared cake on my face,” Kurt grumbled with a laugh, giving a sound of triumph as he got Blaine’s jacket and off and started on his waistcoat.

“It’s good for your skin,” Blaine breathed against his neck as he untied Kurt’s ascot and threw it to the floor.

Soon they were naked and falling onto the bed. Blaine worshiped Kurt’s body. Pushing him back onto the bed, he kissed each of his ankles, licking, sucking and kissing his way up his knees, his thighs, his hips. Kurt bucked up, wanting his straining cock to get the same attention, but Blaine just grinned and kept going. He licked at Kurt’s nipples, nipping lightly before moving to his collar bones and neck, sucking deep bruises into his skin.

Finally Kurt growled and yanked Blaine up by the curls, forcing their mouths together. They lapped at each other’s lips, Kurt sucking on Blaine’s tongue until he moaned.

“Get inside me now,” Kurt said.

“I have to get you ready,” Blaine said, ready to go find the lube.

“Remember how I stopped off in the restroom for a few minutes before we came up?” Kurt asked huskily.

“Yeah,” Blaine said, tilting his head to the side. “Did you?”

“Yes, sweetie, I am all ready for you,” Kurt said, his face turning red.

Blaine groaned at the imagery. “That is so fucking hot.”

“Then hurry up and fuck me,” Kurt said. He reached under the pillow and brought out the bottle of lube. Blaine slicked his cock up and leaned over Kurt, sliding into him so easily they both cried out.

Feeling surrounded by him, Blaine felt sudden tears sting his eyes. Leaning down onto Kurt, he wrapped his arms under Kurt’s back and shoulders until he could lift his torso off the bed. Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine’s neck as they sat wrapped around and inside each other.

“My husband,” Kurt whispered.

“Mine,” Blaine said, tears slipping down his cheek.

Kurt kissed the tears away, slowly undulating his hips. They had moved from passion and lust to need and love. They rocked together, in no hurry, kissing each other, tasting each other. Blaine nuzzled Kurt’s neck as Kurt tugged lightly on his curls. Blaine rejoiced in the whimpers and gasps of delight coming from Kurt. Kurt enjoyed the growling rumble in Blaine’s chest every time he arched his back, making Blaine’s cock hit his prostate. Soon, though, it grew to be too much and Blaine thrust up into Kurt with force.

“I love you,” Kurt whispered.

“I love you too, baby. God, I need you,” Blaine grunted, his body beyond ready to orgasm.

“Come for me, Blaine,” Kurt encouraged. He twisted and slid his hips back and forth, the friction his cock was getting from between their bodies was driving him insane. Tightening his arms around Blaine’s neck, he hugged him impossibly closer.

They sank into each other, thrusting and receiving, moaning and crying at the intense sensations. Blaine suddenly tensed and yelled out, shouting Kurt’s name. The feeling of him coming drove Kurt mad with need and he bucked against Blaine until he came between them, the orgasm going on and on until Kurt was almost crying. Blaine rubbed his back and moved against Kurt as the pulsing and throbbing continued. Finally, Kurt collapsed against Blaine, exhausted. They lay there for several minutes, relearning how to breathe.

Blaine slid out of him carefully and went to get the ritual wash cloth. He lovingly cleaned Kurt, kissing each spot after he wiped it down.

After disposing of the rag, Blaine lay down next to Kurt with his arm out. Kurt crawled into his spot on Blaine’s shoulder, sighing happily.

“You’re my husband,” Kurt said, wonder and awe in his voice.

“I am,” Blaine said, his body shutting down after the force of his orgasm.

“I promise I’ll make you happy,” Kurt whispered.

“You already have,” Blaine replied as his eyes closed, holding Kurt close. “We never realized it, but in this life, all I needed was you and all you needed was me.”

 

. . . . .

**“If Today Was Your Last Day” by Nickelback**

**“For Good” from Wicked**

**“Your Guardian Angel” by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.**


	35. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, this is it, my lovelies. I actually cried a little, knowing this was coming to an end. I hope this last chapter is everything the story deserves.  
> Now, I give you the final chapter of “All You Needed Was Me”.

Three years later....

 

 “Hurry up, they’ll be here soon,” Kurt said, throwing Blaine’s shoes to him.

“Relax babe, we’re their ride, they won’t be going anywhere without us,” Blaine said, slipping his shoes on.

They headed out of the door of their apartment in Paris and went to the car Blaine had hired to drive them around. They went to the airport, Kurt chattering about all of the plans he had.

“Oh and Madame Beaumont is going to use the skirt I designed in her winter line, can you believe it?” Kurt burst out happily.

“The fur lined one?” Blaine asked. Kurt had become quite the designer and had shown Blaine so many sketches and samples, it was hard to keep up.

“Of course the fur lined one. You wouldn’t use a peasant skirt in a winter line, Blaine,” Kurt said, his chin in the air.

“What was I thinking?” Blaine said indulgently.

“Do you think they’ll like the room we got them?” Kurt asked, suddenly nervous.

“Babe, they’ll love it. Calm down,” Blaine assured him.

They arrived at the airport just in time and Kurt hurried them through the maze of hallways and escalators. Just reaching the gate where they couldn’t go any further, Kurt began straining his neck, trying to see around the people in the way.

“There they are,” he squealed.

“Kurt! Blaine!” the familiar voice called.

“Colton! Jason!” Kurt yelled in return.

The two crossed the security line and Kurt threw himself at his friends. It had been too long since he’d seen them. They’d visited off and on over the last three years, but it never seemed to be enough.

“I’ve missed you guys,” Kurt said, his voice breaking.

“We’ve missed you too, Diva,” Jason said, squeezing him tight and nodding a greeting to Blaine. He was standing off to the side, smiling at the scene.

The greetings and hugs lasted a few more minutes before they went to retrieve the luggage and head back to the waiting car.

Blaine directed them to the right hotel and Kurt bounced excitedly. “You guys are going to love this place, it’s like a freaking palace,” he said.

“We’re just glad to be in Paris,” Colton said, his nose against the window, taking in the sights.

Once they were in the hotel and Colton and Kurt had oohed and aahed over everything from the furniture to the view, the four sat down.

“I’m mad at you, by the way,” Kurt said, frowning at the two.

“What’d we do?” Jason asked indignantly.

“You eloped! You freaking eloped and I wasn’t there when you got married,” Kurt accused.

Colton colored. “I just didn’t want to make a big deal of it. It was just for us anyway, so we figured why not. Besides we are here now,” he said.

“For a whole month!” Kurt exclaimed, clapping his hands, his pout immediately over.

“Hey, Blaine, congrats on your book deal. What is this the third or fourth book?” Jason asked.

Blaine tried not to look too pleased. “It’s my fourth. I’ll be starting my book tour in a couple months. Can you believe people actually want me to sign the books? It’s crazy.”

“It’s totally not crazy. You are amazingly talented,” Kurt said smugly. Colton nodded his agreement. “But more congratulations are due,” Kurt announced.

Blaine grabbed his hand, grinning instantly.

“What? Did it happen? Are you going to?” Colton asked, jumping up.

“We’re going to be parents!” Kurt squealed, jumping up and down with Colton.

Jason went and shook Blaine’s hand before pulling him into a hug. “Congrats, man. Wow, you a dad, huh?”

Blaine paled a little. “Yeah, me a dad. It’s crazy.”

“So? Tell us everything,” Colton said, sitting down again.

Kurt couldn’t stop smiling. “Her name is Colette, isn’t that precious? She is three months old with the most adorable brown curls all over her little head. Her eyes are the most beautiful shade of green, almost hazel like Blaine’s. We were approved and we should have her within the month. So if everything goes well, you two will be able to meet her!”

Colton sat there, dazed. “I am so incredibly happy for you,” he said.

“Me too. Seriously, that’s amazing. Colette Hummel-Anderson,” Jason mused.

“Actually,” Blaine interrupted. “She will be Colette Elizabeth Hummel. After that last blow up with my mother, I changed my last name to Hummel. So we are Kurt and Blaine Hummel now.”

Kurt couldn’t hold back his smile. It was just one more way that Blaine was his, now that they shared a name.

“What about your books?” Colton asked after another round of congratulations.

“We are going to reprint them with Blaine Hummel on them,” Blaine said with a shrug. “Easy enough. The publishing company loves me so they were only too happy to agree to this.”

“You make them enough money,” Kurt said.

Blaine just hugged him closer. “We have a question for you guys,” he said, looking at Colton and Jason.

“We would be honored if you two would be Colette’s godparents,” he announced.

Colton and Jason stared at them before Colton began crying. “Of course! We would be honored. Oh my god, I can’t believe this! It’s amazing! I’m gonna be a godpapa!”

“Hey, thanks for the honor, man,” Jason said. “We accept, obviously.”

This, of course, required another round of hugs. Finally Blaine pulled Kurt away.

“Well, we are going to get out of your hair,” Blaine said. “Call us when you’re ready for dinner and we’ll come pick you up.”

“Sounds good,” Jason said.

Kurt and Blaine left, returning to the car. “Let’s go to the tower,” Kurt suggested on a whim.

Blaine looked at him but gave the instructions to the driver.

Soon they were standing on the lower balcony of the Eiffel Tower. Kurt looked out over everything, feeling so full, he couldn’t hold it in.

“Blaine, I am so happy,” he said, a wide smile on his face.

“I know, babe. I am too. We’ll have her soon,” Blaine said. He already loved his soon-to-be daughter. She was a delight and so beautiful it made him ache.

“And then we’ll be a family,” Kurt sighed. “And we’ll never leave her.”

“And we’ll accept her as she is,” Blaine added.

“A family,” Kurt said, leaning his head on Blaine’s shoulder, staring out at the world around them.

“Forever,” Blaine agreed, smiling and pulling Kurt closer to him. Anything was possible, even being happy. He could handle that.

“Love you, Blaine.”

“Love you, too, babe.”

 

**THE END**

**. . . . . .**


End file.
